Mea Culpa

Mea Culpa - Part 6
by Imogen

chapter 6

Viggo clenched and unclenched his hands. He had to tell them, let them know exactly how much damage Mark had done. What if they already knew? If they didn’t, they had a right to know. They were his friends, his family. He looked at Orlando’s still form for a moment and let out a frustrated sigh.

“God. I can’t do this Orlando. The abuse alone is killing them. Dom and Lij are so frightened. I’m more scared of you waking up, because I’m afraid you’ll hate me; hate me for telling Dom and Elijah about… see, I can’t even say it to you! Dr. McCoy told me. Don’t blame her; she’s trying to help. It wasn’t your fault, please believe that. No one blames you, I promise.” He paused, reaching down to stroke Orlando’s curls, his forehead. “I…I just want things to be how they were, you and me. God, I don’t know who I hate more, myself or Mark.”

After a brief pause, he continued. “You know, I kept wondering if you were happier with Mark. I hoped you weren’t; God that sounds awful, but I swear, I never wanted you to be hurt by him. Please believe that, I just couldn’t stand someone loving you more than I did, to accept that it was really over, that you’d moved on. I’m so, so sorry Orli. Please forgive me, angel,” he whispered, his throat catching.

Orlando had once told him that he'd never love anyone the way he loved Viggo. Was that still true? Did he ever think about Viggo, or miss him? Did Mark know everything about Orlando? How Orlando constantly fiddled with his rings when he was nervous, did Orlando snuggle up to Mark at night, trying to bury himself in the crook of his arm, like he’d done with Viggo? He hoped not, he didn't want Mark to know Orlando the way he did. He'd given Orlando to Mark and he hated himself for it. It had taken all of his self-control to not punch Mark just for being with Orlando. He realised at that moment, at the reunion, exactly what he'd lost, what he’d probably never regain.

He let his hand linger for a moment. A small part of Viggo didn’t want Orlando to wake up for two reasons. Orlando was bound to be in pain, and he didn’t want to see him like that, and the other reason was that once he was awake, Viggo couldn’t touch him anymore. Orlando would want him out of his life for good. He couldn’t blame him, it was the least he deserved. As long as Orlando slept, he was safe. They were both safe, Viggo from rejection and Orlando from reality.

“He looks so peaceful,” came Dom’s wistful voice from the door. Elijah was hovering by the side, looking suspiciously like a ghost.

Viggo jumped and quickly pulled away his hand, mentally cursing himself. “How long have you guys been here?”

”Long enough. What do you know?” Lij stated, looking directly at Viggo.

This was it. There was no way he could duck out of this. “We need to go somewhere private,” he insisted.

Dom looked puzzled as a frown spread across his face. “I don’t want to leave Orlando, he needs someone with him,” Elijah argued, a glare spreading across his face.

”This is important Elijah! The nurses are keeping an eye on him. If something happens they’ll let us know,” Viggo reasoned, trying to keep his voice level, but also interject the right amount of pleading.

Reluctantly Elijah nodded and both men followed Viggo to the office where his world had collapsed just a few hours earlier. Eyeing their choices of seating, both Dom and Elijah elected to stand.

How had Dr. McCoy been able to do it? Unconsciously Viggo began pacing the room. Just tell them, then deal with the fallout.

“I… how much…detail do you know about Orlando’s abuse?”

“The physical speaks for itself,” sighed Dom, rubbing his neck. “We always saw Orlando with bruises and cuts, but it varied; sometimes it was an eye or his jaw, sometimes he was kicked. It depended on Mark’s mood.”

“Can you get this over with or are you going to tell us how terrible it all is and how desperately sorry you are?” sneered Elijah, as he automatically pulled out a cigarette. Orli had told him off, said that they would kill him. Now Orli was possibly dying. What would it matter if he coughed his lungs up?

That was enough. Viggo stalked over, looking every inch the ‘don’t fuck with me’ Ranger that Elijah almost gulped. Viggo yanked the cigarette out of Elijah’s mouth.

“It’s a ‘non-smoking area’ Elijah, or can’t you read among your other talents?” Viggo bit back, fury glistening in eyes.

As the condescending words came out, Elijah’s eyes narrowed. “What gives you the fucking right-“ Elijah began, his voice icy.

“Orlando gives me the rigI’m I’m here for him,” snarled Viggo, his hackles rising.

“Oh right, because he means so much that you just had to rip his heart out. You see Orlando throw up until he’s coughing up blood, or when you spend the night rocking Orlando to sleep after *another* nightmare, then tell me you’ve got the right! You’ve no fucking idea what you put him through!!” Elijah snarled as he desperately tried to control the fury welling up in him.

“Look, I’m trying, ok? But I can’t do this if you won’t even give me a chance. Just let me get this out. Shit…I…I don’t know how to even begin…Dr. McCoy told me- something about the abuse. She… didn’t know how much more you could take after hearing all the other… um… details.”

”We know what happened to Orlando. Anyway, she hardly diluted the details, so what’s so different about this?” Elijah asked. Nothing could be worse than seeing your best friend, your virtual brother having the crap beat out of him.

“God, there’s no easy way to say this. Do you know exactly what Mark did to Orland…h-how he abused him?” Viggo asked.

”Boots, fists, stairs, threats, he was pretty thorough,” Dom bit out, his face grim.

Viggo resisted the urge to hit something. “How… far did the abuse go?” Viggo looked at both in turn, keeping his voice steady, calm, reassuring, everything he wasn’t feeling.

“Other than having the living shit kicked out of him?” Elijah stated blandly.

“Besides that. Did Mark do anything - else?” he pressed, a note of impatience creeping into his voice.

“He’s a vicious sadist. far far as I’m concerned nothing can make this worse,” Elijah butted in.

“Things can always get worse,” Viggo whispered.

“Just how could it get worse? C’mon Viggo, we deserve some answers,” Elijah demanded. Why wouldn’t Viggo just tell them? After everything Orlando had been through, shouldn’t things get better, light at the tunnel or something like that?

“He raped Orlando,” he stated.

Viggo was granted their full attention as a look of disbelief and revulsion spread across Elijah’s white face.

“W-what?” Dom whispered, unable to speak.

“Dr. McCoy said it was a regular occurrence.” Professional, concise…now all he had to do was watch his friends disintegrate.

“THAT FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!! HOW DARE HE?!!” yelled Elijah, not caring that Viggo winced when he turned to him.

“Fuck this, you’re probably lying…not even Mark would…” he mentally shuddered.

“It’s the truth Elijah. I wish to God it wasn’t. Dr. McCoy’s got evidence. I’m so sorry Elijah.”

“SORRY?! You think a ‘sorry’ will make things better? You can’t do anything; in fact, you’ve done more than enough! This isn’t some fairytale; you’re not Aragorn, you can’t make anything better. Dom-“

Dominic wasn’t listening. He seemed trapped in a world of horror, as if he was witness to a terrible car crash only he could see.

“Dominic…can I-“ began Viggo, moving forward to try and comfort him, but Dom quickly darted back as if Viggo had stung him.

“No…” He croaked, shaking his head, as if to clear the terrible images forming in his mind. This wasn’t right; Orlando had been through too much already. He wanted nothing more than to throw up.

Viggo’s attempts at comforting Dom were brought to an abrupt halt by Elijah’s shouting.

“HOW COULD HE DO THAT TO ANYONE - TO ORLI?!! FUCKING SICKO…WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON HIM, HE’LL FUCKING WISH HE’D DIED AT BIRTH!!” he thundered. Without any kind of warning, he balled his fist and punched a hole in the nearest wall.

Dom flinched but didn’t say anything. Elijah was breathing hard, a bloodied hand hanging limply by his sideeminemingly oblivious to the pain, gazing intently at the partially destroyed wall as if it could present him Mark. Viggo went over to Elijah, putting a hand on his shoulder, trying to gently tug him back. Viggo was almost knocked off balance when he was roughly shoved back.

Elijah spun round, his eyes flashing with ferocity. “I trusted you! You promised you loved Orli, that you’d protect him. How did you protect him from this? He’s been abused and raped, by his BOYFRIEND because you were scared of some SHITTY HOMOPHOBES!! You’re a fucking coward Viggo Mortensen. Orli gave you everything, like he gave Mark, but it was NEVER ENOUGH!! He’s my friend, my brother. His family is happily living in England, with no fucking clue what’s going on. Mark’s probably enjoying himself, not giving a shit about Orli, and Orlando is probably DYING right now and I can’t help him!!”

“Elijah,“ began Viggo, trying to placate Elijah.

“Don’t you fucking get it, Viggo? It’s gonna change everything. Orlando will NEVER be the same again; he’ll probably never let anyone ever touch him. Once the press finds out – and believe me they will - they’re gonna have a field day. Can you see it: ‘Gay star abused by boyfriend! All the juicy details inside!’? It’s the stuff journalists live for,” he sneered, disgust dripping from every word.

“He’s going to have his life publicly dissected by those parasitic vultures, and Orli’s family gets to read all about it, that’s how they’re gonna find out. Everyone who loves Orli is gonna suffer, and you think you can play the hero?!” Elijah turned away in disgust and crouched down to Dom’s level.

As far as Elijah was concerned, apart from Orli, Dom was the only innocent person in all this shitty business. Slumping down next to Dom, Elijah desperately tried to reign in his anger. As he instinctively reached out to his friend, Dominic backed away, seemingly terrified. He didn’t notice Elijah’s hurt expression as Viggo came up but Elijah ignored him, trying to comfort Dominic again, only to be rejected once more, a little more forcefully this time. Dom didn’t speak; he simply shook his head, and moved away.

Dom was rocking himself, his head clutched in his hands, a look of absolute horror, disgust and fury mingled on his face as his sobs became incoherent. He could barely think, much less form a coherent sentence. He couldn’t explain it to Elijah, or try to soothe him, not now. He hated pushing Elijah away, but he just couldn’t handle…anything, not right now, not when his own heart had been so thoroughly ripped to shreds. God, he should have known; there’d been enough signs. How could he have been so blind?! Was rape really a far step for abuse? Honestly, it should’ve been obvious, how Orlando acted, how he started refusing to do steamy film scenes or wear anything remotely sexy. He’d seen Orli get nervwhenwhen people chatted him up, or how he’d begun to unconsciously flinch whenever anyone touched him. He wanted to scream in frustration and horror, but no sound would come out.

Elijah looked at his friend in absolute disbelief. Dominic had never rejected him before. Why was Dominic pushing him away now, when he so obviously needed his friends? Did some part of Dominic blame himself, or even Elijah? He just stared at Dom, crying and shaking, rocking himself against the wall. In the years he’d known Dominic, he’d never seen his friend lose control like this.

Viggo stood in the middle of the room, looking between the two men, feeling lost. He wanted to comfort Elijah and Dom, but neither would let him near them. What could he do? Lie, tell them it wasn’t real? That bad things like that didn’t happen, not to good people like Orlando?

“Please don’t me me away Dom,” Elijah urged as he sat down next to Dom.

It amazed Viggo to see Elijah, who not minutes ago had been swelled with rage, become tender and concerned towards his friend. Still no response, Dom just turned his head away, not looking up as he tightened his grip around his legs, his head buried in his lap. The sobs were silent now, but the shaking could still be seen in a silent testimony to Dom’s agony.

Elijah looked at Dom, confused as to how to proceeightight now Dom was the only person he could bear to look at without an all-consuming rage within him, and now Dom was rejecting him. He was only trying to help, why couldn’t Dom see that?

“Easy Elijah, just give him some space,” Viggo suggested.

“In case you’ve forgotten, I’ve dealt with this for four years. I don’t appreciate you barging in with your Zen attitude when you’ve got NO idea what I’ve… what we’ve, been going through. I’ve gone through jas mas much as Dom in this shit, and if he wants to close himself off, fine! I’m going for a fag. With any luck I might actually die before I get too old to care about friend’s well-being!”

Viggo moved forward “Look, I know you’re angry, I just want to help. I’m here if-“

Elijah’s eyes held a mixture of fury and disbelief.

“Lij, I know you’re angry, you have every right to be-“

Elijah’s eyes hardened at Viggo’s words. “Don’t call me Lij, I’m not your ‘buddy’. You think I’m an Ang Anger doesn’t even begin to cover what I feel so don’t even try to understand, or try to baby me; I’m not a child, I know how the world works.”

“I want to help you. I didn’t tell you because I wanted to hurt you, but I felt you had a right to know.”

Elijah couldn’t take any more as he strode over to the door.

“Please Elijah, just wait,” Viggo jumped up and without thinking grabbing Elijah’s arm, to stop him from wrenching the door handle off.

“Get the fuck off meisseissed Elijah with such venom it was almost palpable.

“Elijah-“ began Viggo, his tone lowering in warning.

Elijah let out a humourless laugh. “Oh threats, that’ll work. Well, Orlando quickly caught on, behave or bruise. Simple enough really-“

”Elijah, please just stop it.“

“Or what, you’ll hit me? Isn’t that what people do? C’mon then Viggo, you’re a big, strong man - I’m an easy target aren’t I, like Orlando, vulnerable, remember?”

Truthfully for a moment Viggo wanted to grab him, shake some sense into him, but would he have reacted any differently? In truth, he deserved at least some of Elijah’s venomous anger.

“It definitely calmed Orlando down. It’s amazing what a few punches will get you. What are you waiting for Viggo? Oh that’s right, you don’t hit, you’re too noble to hit anyone.”

“Stop it!” muttered Dominic, from his position on the floor.

Dom looked up and Elijah wanted nothing more than to hug him, soothe away his hurt, but he also wanted to cry; Dom was empty…lost.

“Please…just… don’t. This is about Orli, not who’s to blame. Save your hatred for Mark, Lij, please,” he whispered, a note of pleading in his voice.

Elijah looked chagrined; he’d beo wro wrapped up in his anger, convinced only his hurt mattered. To hear from Viggo that Mark had violated Orli, he just saw red.

“God, I’m sorry Dom.”

“It’ll be ok,” Viggo whispered, cautiously laying a hand on Dom’s shoulder.

“How? Orli could die. I can’t let him die Viggo,” Elijah’s voice lowered for what seemed the first time in hours, his anger seemed to have exhausted itself.

Viggo felt his heart constrict. It’s a wonder he could still feel at all. “He won’t die. We’ll help Orli and each other,” he kept his voice low.

“You can’t promise that Viggo,” came the quiet reply.

At last Viggo allowed his own tears to fall as he was forced to fahe the truth of Elijah’s words.

“I’m so sorry, Orli. I never wanted to hurt you,” he whispered, gazing off into the distance as the tears slid down his face.

Elijah stood for a moment, not knowing what to do as he stared at Dom and Viggo lying on the floor, almost as if the wall was supporting them.

Seeing the look of utter devastation and sorrow on Viggo’s face made his gut twist. How had Mark managed to wreck so many lives? Without pausing, Elijah reached out to touch Dominic, being prepared for a rebuff. It didn’t come, and Elijah felt himself sag in relief. He feared that he’d lost Dom to the sorrow that had seemed to eat him up.

“I love you Lijah. I…I didn’t mean to push you away, I just…feel so lost,” he whispered as tears streaked down his face, a look of utter misery visible.

“There’s nothing to forgive,” he soothed; he couldn’t be angry with Dom.

Viggo stared into space as the words tumbled from his lips. “When… Dom and told me about Orli’s attempted suicide, I wanted to die myself. I couldn’t understand why Orli would do that, then I heard about the abuse and the rapes and I wanted to crawl away, to hide and I hated myself even more for that. You’ve always been there for Orlando, when I should’ve been. Don’t ever think you’ve let Orlando down in any way, either of you. If it weren’t for you both, Orlando would be dead. I want to make amends with Orlando, if he’ll let mewantwant him back in my life, however much he’ll allow.”

There was a long silence after Viggo’s speech. He’d bared his soul to them and he hoped this would help them begin to trust him again. He didn’t want to fight. He felt as lost and hurt as they did. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could do this; he was crumbling, slowly.

Elijah pulled Dom close to him, trying to offer what little comfort he could.

“Remember that morning, afthe the Reunion. He was so quiet; he had bruises then. That’s probably when it started. I don’t know what set Mark off, maybe he just flipped,” Elijah offered.

There was a horrible pause as Viggo felt his heart clench at Elijah’s words. Didn’t they know?

“I ran into Orlando at the reunion,” he blurted. The two men looked up and stared at him as if he’d just announced he was pregnant.

“Wait…you…and Orlando met, at the reunion, with Mark. We should’ve taken Orli home with us. We all saw how angry Mark was… that’s probably when it all started,” whispered Elijah, his eyes brimming with tears. This was so much worse, knowing that they could probably pinpoint the exact time the abuse began.

<>

Orlando was curled listlessly on the bed, not moving. His entire body ached way way he never thought possible. Flashes of the previous night came back to him and he felt the taste of bile rise up in his mouth. Rushing to the bathroom, he emptied the contents of his stomach, and probably half his stomach lining as well.

He glanced at his reflection in the small mirror and shuddered. Bruises were beginning to form around his neck and shoulders, a testimony to what had happened last night, yet his heart and soul rejected it, screamed at him that Mark lovim, im, but the evidence was there. A silent, stubborn sign of what he couldn’t even admit to himself; to admit it would make it real, and Orlando couldn’t stand that, not ever. He felt so dirty and tired, a terrible self-loathing hanging over him. No matter how much he’d showered, nothing would shift it, like a lingering stench, choking him.

He’d sworn it was for Orlando’s own good, he’d been left with no option. Was that true? Did he deserve the pain Mark had put him through? He promised Orlando it was cleansing him, making him Mark’s again. Orlando could have sworn Mark spat out ‘Viggo’ in between his tirades at Orlando, blaming him. But by the end he’d cried, begged Orlando to forgive him. He’d hurt so much, every part of him ached and burned, and not in a good way. He’d tried to absolve Mark but no words had come out; for the first time Orlando hadn’t been able to speak, the pain had been too much. He’d turned on his side, allowing the tears to fall, praying Mark wouldn’t notice. He’d tried not to cringe when Mark had pulled him close, whispering meaningless endearments in his ear.

Orlando wasn’t an expert in male relationships but he knew enough to know this wasn’t right. He shouldn’t hurt like this, not so badly. He’d never hurt with Viggo, he mused. Viggo had always treated him like glass, worshipping him like an idol, whispering Orlando was his god, his perfection. Orlando had never understood that. Orlando wasn’t an idol. He was human. Viggo had always put him on a pedestal, too high, too unstable and now he’d fallen, hard. It seemed so long ago, like he was another person; a young man so full of laughter and innocence, curls glistening and his eyes dancing with untold mischief and love. Now those same eyes were dead. Idol, what a joke, he snorted disdainfully at himself. If Viggo could see him now, his godhood was stripped to reveal what? A coward. He couldn’t stop Mark last night, and he couldn’t face his friends now.
In his mind he was so terrified of rejection he’d let Mark do what he wanted. Mark said he loved him. Maybe he showed it in a different way. That had to be it; he loved Orlando, he’d said it, held him and promised to never let him go. That had convinced Orlando. He didn’t want to be left alone, to be unloved…unlovable. Viggo didn’t love him anymore, that was certain; he’d practically ran away from him last night, but not before giving him a look of pity. That was all that Viggnsidnsidered worthy of him now. To have someone who claimed to have loved you so deeply look at you like a hurt puppy…it had crushed him. He’d been so convinced he was over Viggo. He would never be over Viggo, and he hated it. It wasn’t fair to Mark, who loved him, who stayed with him. He didn’t deserve someone with a broken heart.
He was shaken out of his self-recrimination by the doorbell ringing rather incessantly. Orlando cringed. He couldn’t face the outside world in any form at the moment. Heading back to the bed, a source of comfort and infinite pain all at once, he hoped they’d give up and leave. He tried not to make a sound as he felt tears prick his eyes and harshly brushed them away. The bell stopped and Orlando breathed a sigh of relief, until he heard the lock wrangle and someone let themselves in. He felt his heart pound and tried desperately to fight the urge to hide under the covers. Making an effort to control his quivering mussels, he sat rigidly silent on the bed and waited.
“Hello!!” came a voice. Dominic. He cursed the day he’d given his friends the spare key. “Orli, mate, you here?” No reply.
“Orlando?” came another voice. That was Elijah. Maybe he had time to jump out the window? He silently congratulated himself for getting dressed. “Can you hear us?” How could he not?
Dom came in first, with Elijah trotting behind. Trust them to choose the bedroom as the first place to look; they really knew him too well.
“Are you OK Orlando?” he asked, a look of concern painted on his face, as he looked at his friend on the bed. Very unlike Orlando, he seemed…smaller somehow.
“I’m fine, just tired. I didn’t get a lot of sleep last night. I’ve got a lot on my mind. What are you guys doing here?” Orlando asked, not looking up, anything he could do to deflect attention away from him was good.
Elijah was nothing if not an observant little bugger, and would immediately pick up on something. Dom was almost as bad; he had this way of looking at someone, sussing out the truth. How annoying. Of all the people that could have called on him today, why did it have to be Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson in training? Bloody wonderful.
“Just you had to leave really quickly last night. I said I’d try and organise something today, remember?” Dom said, beginning to feel rather uneasy. Orlando was hiding something from them, but what?
“How’s Mark?” Elijah butted in. Dom wanted to throttle his friend. Normally it would be considered a civilised question, but Elijah’s tone made it anything but civilised.
At Mark’s name, Orlando fidgeted, and Dom noticed how pained he looked. What the hell was going on?
“He’s fine, he had to leave really early for work. Why?” Orlando tried to keep his voice level.
Elijah eyed him carefully, taking in Orlando’s reactions; the fiddling hands…were they shaking? The lack of colour in his face, the ridged unnatural posture was so unlike Orli.
“Oh, no reason. He just looked a bit… annoyed last night. I got the impression he wanted to get going,” Elijah said, widening his eyes in fake innocence.
Under other circumstances, Orlando would have laughed but he felt himself squirm instead. A horrible chill was creeping up his spine. Dominic nudged Elijah none to gently in the ribs, causing a scowl from the younger man.
“We were just worried that’s all.”
“Well you needn’t be. I’m fine, everything’s fine, why wouldn’t it be? We had a fight, that’s it. Couples row, we made up, end of story!” Orlando exclaimed, his words coming harsher than he’d intended.

Both Elijah and Dom looked a little shocked. Elijah noticed Orlando was clamming up, which was not good. Friends didn’t keep secrets, did they?

“Look, Orlando, if there’s something you’re hiding-“

“Stop it Elijah!! You’re my friend, not my bloody keeper. Just stay out of it, will you?!” he demanded, becoming more than a little flustered and pissed off with Elijah’s constant questioning. “I couldn’t sleep last night. I’m exhausted, plus I’ve got a nasty hangover, happy?”
“You didn’t drink, remember? You stuck to water, and the last time I checked water doesn’t give you a hangover,” Elijah challenged, a rather triumphant sound in his voice.
Orlando looked like he’d choked on a lemon and wanted nothing more than to bolt.
“Lij, just leave it OK? Orli clearly doesn’t want us around at the moment,” sighed Dom, and for some reason that made Orlando feel even worse. It wasn’t their fault Mark was mad. They were just trying to help.
“I’m sorry, both of you. I just feel really grotty and tired; it’s nothing personal, I swear. I’m just not good company today and I’ve been busy feeling sorry for myself.” There, good performance. They didn’t need to know how terrible he felt, that he wanted to crawl under a rock and die; that he could barely look at his friends anymore.
His control was hanging by a thread. If they didn’t leave he was going to start crying, telling them he was scared, but he couldn’t do that to his friends. Dom would be pushing him out the door if he knew what had happened, and he had to stay, sort things out. Viggo had quit over their relationship, and Orlando wasn’t going to do that with Mark. If he hadn’t met Viggo last night nothing would have happened. Even far away Viggo managed to screw up his life.
Elijah looked most unhappy about the whole situation. “Just come out for a drink or something Orli,” he cajoled. Why was Orlando acting like this? He just couldn’t understand it. “Everyone misses their prissy elf.”
Orlando shook his head firmly. “I’m too tired Elijah, sorry.”
Dom looked around the room, resisting the urge to crinkle his face. He watched Orlando fiddle with the blanket, noticing how his friend’s fingers trembled; the sweater seemed ridiculously big for Orlando’s slight frame. As Orlando fiddled, the sleeves rolled up slightly and Dom caught a glance of Orli’s wrist; there was definitely bruising on it. He frowned at that, just how much of a ‘row’ had they had last night?
Elijah moved easily towards the bed and plonked himself down as if he owned it. He’d helped Orlando pick it out, shortly after he arrived in New Zealand. For a moment Elijah said nothing, kicking his legs against the bed, humming deliberately off key. Dom was looking decidedly confused. What was the little git playing at?
“Have you eaten today?” Elijah suddenly asked conversationally.
Startled by the question, Orlando shook his head dumbly. He didn’t know whether he could hold any food down right now.
“Great! Me and Dommie-boy are taking you out for a real meal. No buts. My treat, you’re all skin and bones. There is nothing to eat here, cept that veggie crap you call ‘food’. C’mon, get up,” he urged, pulling on Orlando’s arm, which was presently shrinking away.
“I’m not hungry-“ began Orli, but Elijah shook his head firmly.
“Best friends look out for each other. Look, you’ll feel better if you eat something. You can’t live on rabbit food all your life. I want some company, besides Dom,” he wheedled, yanking harder on Orlando’s sweater. As Orlando pulled away, his sweater rolled up, exposing his arm to his friends.
A dead silence fell over the room, and Orlando looked away, ashamed. Elijah had a grim smile on his face. He’d seen! Dom didn’t know whether to yell or hug him.
“What’s going on Orlando? Did Mark you you-“
“Mark has nothing to do with it. He doesn’t know; I didn’t want to worry him,” Orlando whispered, not looking up.
Elijah reached up and hugged Orlando, noticing, rather unhappily, that Orlando froze. “OK fine, Mark’s innocent, but something’s up Orlando. Don’t try and pull a load of bull with us, please.”
”He’s right Orli. If you don’t want to talk right now, that’s OK. We’re always here for you no matter what. We love you, you know that, right? C’mon get changed, we’ll wait for you,” Dom said, his voice soothing and comforting. Dom had that affect on people.
Slowly he nodded. He couldn’t stay here, not right now; he was scared to be alone. He could go somewhere else; pretend home felt safe from a distance.
No one spoke while Orlando changed into a random sweater. Turning back he looked at his friends and smiled slightly as he ran a hand through his hair, trying to make it behave. Taking his keys, he debated about leaving a note for Mark. Mark wouldn’t be happy if he didn’t know where Orli was, but even less happy if he did. Suddenly, looking at his friend’s concerned expressions, Orlando found he didn’t care. They said they’d always be there for him, and he knew that was true. If Mark was angry about him going out, so be it. He didn’t leave a note for Mark as he walked out the door with Dom and Elijah flanking him, rather like mini-bodyguards. He vaguely wondered if he could call his home ‘safe’ again.
<>
Viggo, Dominic and Elijah had been sitting silently in the doctor’s room for over half an hour, struggling to come to terms with this new information.

“My meeting Orli at the…I never liked the fucking bastard when I met him,” Viggo sighed, a bitter grin on his face. “Of course then it was petty jealousy. I should have looked more closely.”

”And have Beanie lecture you about ‘ex’s decorum’?” teased Dom. It seemed too easy to fall back into the old pattern of their friendship.

“If it’s any consolation, I hated him with a fiery vengeance when I met him too,” Elijah offered, no shame in his voice.

“Don’t let Elijah kid you. He was still sore you and Orli weren’t together,” Dom sighed. “I thought he was just being a stubborn git, moo tho than usual. He gave Kate hell too.”

“I had justifiable cause,” Elijah said haughtily.

Viggo smiled slightly. Hearing them banter like this, it was almost as if nothing had changed. Lord knows he was more than willing to turn his back on reality.

“She was blond and too perky. What was I supposed to do?” he shrugged.

“You really liked me and Orli together?” Viggo suddenly spoke up, curiosity tingeing his voice.

Elijah nodded seriously. “You guys were always so happy together. You loved him. It was the break-up you seriously fucked up, not the relationship.”

“Thanks. I think,” Viggo whispered, looking off into the distance.

“Anytime, Vi,” Elijah smirked.

”Don’t call me that, Ellie,” Viggo warned, a grin plastering his face.

“Sure, smelly ranger.”

“Pervy hobbit.”

“Would-be king.”

“Pansy assed halfling.”

‘Elf screwer’ almost tumbled from Elijah’s lips, but he caught himself just in time. There was no need to make things worse.

As the name-calling went back and forth, Dom found himself smiling, truly smiling since he found Orlando. What made him smile the most, though, were Viggo and Elijah, because they were smiling too.

“When are we going to tell the Bloom women?” Elijah sighed, his tone turning serious again.

“Bast’ll want to know too,” sighed Dom.

Before Viggo could think of a reply, there was a gentle knock on the door. How long had they been in here anyway? Probably too long. He kept forgetting the hospital was public.

A soft cough interrupted them. As they looked up, they found Dr. McCoy standing there, a small smile on her face. She felt a rush of relief when the three men before her smiled, real smiles that lit up their eyes. Seeing the devotion to Orlando was heart-warming, and heartbreaking all at once.

“I’m sorry to interrupt you, but Orlando’s waking up. He started coming around about ten minutes ago.”
At this, three heads shot up in disbelief.
”H-he’s awake?! Can we see him?” asked Elijah, jumping up with an unbridled enthusiasm, his eyes sparkling with relief and gratitude.
“Yes, but not for long. He’s still very groggy, so don’t expect summersaults from him.” She smiled. “But before we go, I just want you to be prepared …he doesn’t look good. Don’t push him for details or reasons, just…be there for him,” she offered, as she stood aside. “I’ll be along in a moment.”
The two younger men practically fell out the door in their haste to see their friend. Viggo walked slower, an all-consuming dread welling up within him. This was it, time to face reality.
“Aren’t you going to visit Orlando?” she queried. He’d had spent hours by Orlando. Why wasn’t he with his friends?
“I don’t want to crowd Orlando,” he offered with a shaky smile.
“You want to avoid a surprise reunion?” she offered with a wry smile. “I’m assuming you’ve talked about Orlando?” she asked, and received a nod of affirmation.

“He’s going to get through this, he’s a fighter,” Viggo smiled wistfully. “He always was.”

“It’s not my business, but I really think you should be there too. If not for your own peace of mind, then for your friends; they need support as well.”

Viggo nodded slowly. To see Orlando one last time, awake and alive.

“I…umm…thank you,” he offered simply, a tentative smile gracing his lips, as he walked down the hall, trying not to run, either to or away from Orlando.
Dr. McCoy sighed as she saw him walk away. Maybe this tale would have a happy ending. She could hope; it’s what people did best, after all.

Tbc in part 7