Legolas Finds Love. And Loses a Mitten.
folder
-Multi-Age › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
8
Views:
2,980
Reviews:
23
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
-Multi-Age › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
8
Views:
2,980
Reviews:
23
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Four
Aragorn? Legolas? Chapter Four is starting.
Aragorn: [panting] Wait a minute, will you?
Legolas: Harder! Ohhh, yeah. Thaaats it!
Aragorn: Hail to the King, baby.
*~*~* Three hours, four minutes, and nine sec seconds later *~*~*
Legolas: [walking a bit funny] Okay, we're ready.
Aragorn: Let's do this thing!
//
A Secret Reveled" 4
When Layoin and Legolas came back to Rivendell they ran to find Lord Elrond. On the way there they ran into Aragorn!
//
Aragorn: You need to watch where you're going. Second time this fic that you've run into me!
Legolas: Sorry. Must be all that revelling in secrets.
Aragorn: Another secret? Didn't we just reveal one?
Legolas: Yeah, well you know. Mary Sues are a tricky lot. Got lots of secrets and whatnot.
//
"Woo there," he said as Layoin ran past him. She stopped and looked at him, and then Aragorn looked back at Legolas.
"Ah there you are Legolas, ware have you been all day?"
//
Legolas: Woo there, eh? Articulate bastard.
Aragorn: Yeah. Apparently I'm not the brightest bulb in the box. You've run into me, but I've only just realised it's you.
//
"I have been out with the Lady Layoin, but now we must go find lord El." ."
"Why may I ask?"
"For we were ambushed by Orc's in the woods and now we need to worn the lord for we fear that the Orc's are coming this way" said Layoin.
'Ai, you must be the Lady Layoin, your father has told me much about you.but you are not dressed like a lady"
"I do not have to be do I?"
"No I guess not"
"Then pleas excuse us for now" Layoin said and ran off.
//
Aragorn: There's entirely too much emphasis on the fact that she's wearing pence, er, pants. Or ters,ers, even.
Legolas: She's got the pence in the pockets of the pants under her trousers.
Aragorn: Right. Have you got pants under your trousers?
Legolas: Don't be daft. Elves don't wear pants. Or trousers. We wear leggings and you know it. Now stop asking asinine questions so we can get this piss-awful story done with.
Aragorn: I was just making pleas and excuses not to have to do this.
Legolas: [groans]
//
Legolas looked at Aragorn and shrugged his shoulders and ran after Layoin. They got to lord Elrond's chamber and burst in. He was talking to Layoin's father. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him. The two elves looked at her. Legolas came from behind her and put his hand on her shoulders.
//
Legolas: So we went into the chamber, back out, and then burst in? Seems like a waste of energy to me.
Aragorn: Got pretty big hands to be putting one of them on both her shoulders.
Legolas: You know what they say about Elves with big hands. . .
Aragorn: Yeah. They've got to have their grey fluffy gloves specially ordered.
//
'Layoin why are you dressed like that and. why do u carry a weapon" Marhash said
//
Aragorn: Translated into English: "'Layoin, why are you dressed like that? And why are you carrying a weapon?' Marhash asked."
//
"Father lesion I shall explain that later but I have to tell you something of great importance."
//
Legolas: Father Lesion. Sounds like a bad television programme.
Aragorn: Wherein the villain is a priest gone homicidal?
Legolas: No, not homicidal. He just goes around causing people injury.
//
"NO! I want my question answered first daughter. You do not look like how a far elf should"
//
Legolas: She looks more like a close Elf.
//
"I'm sorry father I know I'm not dressed to your liking."
"You are not dressed to an elf's liking and I want to know why?"
"I was out shouting with Legolas"
//
Aragorn: Doesn't he follow fashion? She's wearing the latest in shouting attire.
//
"Daughter you are not telling me all the truth, and how do you know how to use a bow"
"Is this really necessary Father"
"Yes it is"
"Hindo taught me"
"Your brother taught you this! Do you not know that you should not be dealing with a bow"
"I know father but I'm at at it and I know what I'm doing"
"How do you know your good?"
"Must I explain everything to you Father?"
"You are my daughter and I do not wish for you to get hurt."
//
Legolas: [grabbing mobile and ringing Punctuation Police] Hello? Yes. I'd like to report the gross misuse of punctuation in a Mary Sue. Yes, I'll hold. [humming along to hold music] Oh, okay. Yes. She's got her exclamations and questions all buggered up. And she has no ideat pat periods come at the ends of sentences. Okay. Thanks anyway.
Aragorn: Are they sending someone out?
Legolas: No. They've got quite a backlog of bad!fic to deal with, so we're on our own.
Aragorn: Rats!
//
"I'm old enough to take care of my self. I am in an army and."
Layoin stopped talking because she just realized what she said.
"You joined the Lorien army?"
Layoin looked down and said nothing.
"Answer me Layoin" Marhash said
Layoin looked at Legolas, he grabbed her hand and held it tight. "I believe in you," he whispered to her in elvish.
//
Legolas: I whispered to her in Elvish so Elrond and Marhash-the-Ganja-toker couldn't understand. Since they aren't Elves, and therefore don't speak Elvish.
Aragorn: Was that Quenya, Sindarin, or Silvan? Perhaps Black Speech?
Legolas: Don't confuse the poor dear any further, Aragorn.
//
"Yes father. I disguise my self and they let me join"
"Layoin of all people how could you do this to me. We lost your mother in battle and I do not wish to lose you to the way I lost her."
//
Legolas: So her mother desisted herself as male as well to join the renowned Lórien army?
Aragorn: Huh?
Legolas: That's right, you weren't here for the second chapter. She was a young she-elf because she desisted being male and joined the army.
Aragorn: Could have been worse. She could have disguised herself as an Indian chief, a cop, a cowboy, and construction worker and joined the Navy. Or at least have sung about it.
Legolas: I'm going to *pretend* I know what you're on about, cos I really don't.
Aragorn: The Village People.
Legolas: Oh. Right. [moves slowly away from Aragorn]
//
"But father this is what I like"
"No I will not let you do this to your family! You can no longer be in the Army"
"But you can not tell me what I can and can not do"
"I will tell you what to do as long as you're my daughter"
//
Aragorn: So, she's not his daughter forever then? You Elves are strange.
Legolas: I'm just bloody amazed she used the correct forms of your and you're.
//
"That is not fair Father"
"I will not discuss this now. The conversation is closed you can not be in the army any longer"
Layoin began to cry and she ran out of the room. Legolas looked back at her and then to Marhash.
//
Legolas: I've got amazing x-ray vision to see through walls. I can see people after they've left a room.
//
"I do not understand your ways. She is good for we fought Orc's in the Forest not to long ago"
"Orc's here in the forest of Rivendell?" said Lord Elrond
//
Aragorn: If you've got to be good for something, it may as well be fighting Orc's Inn.
Legolas: Especially when Orc himself has made a special appearance in the Forest.
//
"Yes that is what we came to tell you about for we fear there coming here."
"I must go then for I need to send out scouts and prepare the elves, please excuse me" Lord Elrond said and then walked out of the room. Legolas stood there looking at Marhash then he spoke.
"You crushed your daughters heart" he said to him then walked out of the room. There he left Marhash sitting by him self to think about what just happened.
//
Legolas: I've sent Marhash to his room to think about what a bad Elf he's been.
Aragorn: I should send you to my room, cos you've been a bad Elf too.
Legolas: When was I bad?
Aragorn: In about ten minutes, you're going to be positively wicked.
Aragorn: [panting] Wait a minute, will you?
Legolas: Harder! Ohhh, yeah. Thaaats it!
Aragorn: Hail to the King, baby.
*~*~* Three hours, four minutes, and nine sec seconds later *~*~*
Legolas: [walking a bit funny] Okay, we're ready.
Aragorn: Let's do this thing!
//
A Secret Reveled" 4
When Layoin and Legolas came back to Rivendell they ran to find Lord Elrond. On the way there they ran into Aragorn!
//
Aragorn: You need to watch where you're going. Second time this fic that you've run into me!
Legolas: Sorry. Must be all that revelling in secrets.
Aragorn: Another secret? Didn't we just reveal one?
Legolas: Yeah, well you know. Mary Sues are a tricky lot. Got lots of secrets and whatnot.
//
"Woo there," he said as Layoin ran past him. She stopped and looked at him, and then Aragorn looked back at Legolas.
"Ah there you are Legolas, ware have you been all day?"
//
Legolas: Woo there, eh? Articulate bastard.
Aragorn: Yeah. Apparently I'm not the brightest bulb in the box. You've run into me, but I've only just realised it's you.
//
"I have been out with the Lady Layoin, but now we must go find lord El." ."
"Why may I ask?"
"For we were ambushed by Orc's in the woods and now we need to worn the lord for we fear that the Orc's are coming this way" said Layoin.
'Ai, you must be the Lady Layoin, your father has told me much about you.but you are not dressed like a lady"
"I do not have to be do I?"
"No I guess not"
"Then pleas excuse us for now" Layoin said and ran off.
//
Aragorn: There's entirely too much emphasis on the fact that she's wearing pence, er, pants. Or ters,ers, even.
Legolas: She's got the pence in the pockets of the pants under her trousers.
Aragorn: Right. Have you got pants under your trousers?
Legolas: Don't be daft. Elves don't wear pants. Or trousers. We wear leggings and you know it. Now stop asking asinine questions so we can get this piss-awful story done with.
Aragorn: I was just making pleas and excuses not to have to do this.
Legolas: [groans]
//
Legolas looked at Aragorn and shrugged his shoulders and ran after Layoin. They got to lord Elrond's chamber and burst in. He was talking to Layoin's father. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him. The two elves looked at her. Legolas came from behind her and put his hand on her shoulders.
//
Legolas: So we went into the chamber, back out, and then burst in? Seems like a waste of energy to me.
Aragorn: Got pretty big hands to be putting one of them on both her shoulders.
Legolas: You know what they say about Elves with big hands. . .
Aragorn: Yeah. They've got to have their grey fluffy gloves specially ordered.
//
'Layoin why are you dressed like that and. why do u carry a weapon" Marhash said
//
Aragorn: Translated into English: "'Layoin, why are you dressed like that? And why are you carrying a weapon?' Marhash asked."
//
"Father lesion I shall explain that later but I have to tell you something of great importance."
//
Legolas: Father Lesion. Sounds like a bad television programme.
Aragorn: Wherein the villain is a priest gone homicidal?
Legolas: No, not homicidal. He just goes around causing people injury.
//
"NO! I want my question answered first daughter. You do not look like how a far elf should"
//
Legolas: She looks more like a close Elf.
//
"I'm sorry father I know I'm not dressed to your liking."
"You are not dressed to an elf's liking and I want to know why?"
"I was out shouting with Legolas"
//
Aragorn: Doesn't he follow fashion? She's wearing the latest in shouting attire.
//
"Daughter you are not telling me all the truth, and how do you know how to use a bow"
"Is this really necessary Father"
"Yes it is"
"Hindo taught me"
"Your brother taught you this! Do you not know that you should not be dealing with a bow"
"I know father but I'm at at it and I know what I'm doing"
"How do you know your good?"
"Must I explain everything to you Father?"
"You are my daughter and I do not wish for you to get hurt."
//
Legolas: [grabbing mobile and ringing Punctuation Police] Hello? Yes. I'd like to report the gross misuse of punctuation in a Mary Sue. Yes, I'll hold. [humming along to hold music] Oh, okay. Yes. She's got her exclamations and questions all buggered up. And she has no ideat pat periods come at the ends of sentences. Okay. Thanks anyway.
Aragorn: Are they sending someone out?
Legolas: No. They've got quite a backlog of bad!fic to deal with, so we're on our own.
Aragorn: Rats!
//
"I'm old enough to take care of my self. I am in an army and."
Layoin stopped talking because she just realized what she said.
"You joined the Lorien army?"
Layoin looked down and said nothing.
"Answer me Layoin" Marhash said
Layoin looked at Legolas, he grabbed her hand and held it tight. "I believe in you," he whispered to her in elvish.
//
Legolas: I whispered to her in Elvish so Elrond and Marhash-the-Ganja-toker couldn't understand. Since they aren't Elves, and therefore don't speak Elvish.
Aragorn: Was that Quenya, Sindarin, or Silvan? Perhaps Black Speech?
Legolas: Don't confuse the poor dear any further, Aragorn.
//
"Yes father. I disguise my self and they let me join"
"Layoin of all people how could you do this to me. We lost your mother in battle and I do not wish to lose you to the way I lost her."
//
Legolas: So her mother desisted herself as male as well to join the renowned Lórien army?
Aragorn: Huh?
Legolas: That's right, you weren't here for the second chapter. She was a young she-elf because she desisted being male and joined the army.
Aragorn: Could have been worse. She could have disguised herself as an Indian chief, a cop, a cowboy, and construction worker and joined the Navy. Or at least have sung about it.
Legolas: I'm going to *pretend* I know what you're on about, cos I really don't.
Aragorn: The Village People.
Legolas: Oh. Right. [moves slowly away from Aragorn]
//
"But father this is what I like"
"No I will not let you do this to your family! You can no longer be in the Army"
"But you can not tell me what I can and can not do"
"I will tell you what to do as long as you're my daughter"
//
Aragorn: So, she's not his daughter forever then? You Elves are strange.
Legolas: I'm just bloody amazed she used the correct forms of your and you're.
//
"That is not fair Father"
"I will not discuss this now. The conversation is closed you can not be in the army any longer"
Layoin began to cry and she ran out of the room. Legolas looked back at her and then to Marhash.
//
Legolas: I've got amazing x-ray vision to see through walls. I can see people after they've left a room.
//
"I do not understand your ways. She is good for we fought Orc's in the Forest not to long ago"
"Orc's here in the forest of Rivendell?" said Lord Elrond
//
Aragorn: If you've got to be good for something, it may as well be fighting Orc's Inn.
Legolas: Especially when Orc himself has made a special appearance in the Forest.
//
"Yes that is what we came to tell you about for we fear there coming here."
"I must go then for I need to send out scouts and prepare the elves, please excuse me" Lord Elrond said and then walked out of the room. Legolas stood there looking at Marhash then he spoke.
"You crushed your daughters heart" he said to him then walked out of the room. There he left Marhash sitting by him self to think about what just happened.
//
Legolas: I've sent Marhash to his room to think about what a bad Elf he's been.
Aragorn: I should send you to my room, cos you've been a bad Elf too.
Legolas: When was I bad?
Aragorn: In about ten minutes, you're going to be positively wicked.