Mea Culpa

Mea Culpa

by Imogen
Warnings: domestic abuse, attempted sucide, violence, language, slash
pairings: Orli/OC, Vig/Orli, possibly others
Thanks: beta Gwen
archive: sure, just let me know


Chapter 4:


The party had been winding down for some time now. Despite his initial reservations, he was glad Orlando had persuaded him to invite everyone round. Everyone seemed to have had a good time. Karl Miranda and Liv all having left a while ago, and Beanie was just taking off and only three hobbits, an elf, a ranger and a wizard lingered. Orlando was resting against Viggo’s chest, clearly dozing off, while Ian was quietly chatting with Viggo. Elijah was leaning against Dom under the pretext of ‘manly companionship’. Billy seemed to find this highly amusing and even more so when Dom gave him an ‘evil eye’.

Viggo unconsciously ran his hands through Orlando’s hair, careful not to wake him.

“You really love him, don’t you,” smiled Ian. It wasn’t a question.

“More than I thought possible,” whispered Viggo as he placed a gentle kiss on Orlando’s forehead.

Seeing this tender act, Elijah promptly let out of whoop of joy, grinning like a maniac.

“You guys are just ... great, I love you sooo much,” Elijah grinned stupidly. Billy laughed out loud and Dom groaned theatrically.

“Why thank you, Frodo. Glad to know we have your blessing, but shut up. The Elf’s tired,” Viggo whispered.

Ian grinned at Elijah; the young man did have a point. They did make a rather striking couple, polar opposites that were perfectly aligned. Yes, this was one couple that might just make it. There was no doubt of Orlando’s love for Viggo; that had been obvious since the latter had arrived.

True, it had begun as admiration, maybe even awe, but it quickly changed. Ian had watched as Viggo had become infatuated with Orlando and his struggle to make his feelings go unnoticed, but Ian was nothing if not observant. The little touches, smiles and jokes; it was building up into a very beautiful love story and Ian couldn’t be happier for his friends.

“Oh come on, seriously! Look at you guys. You’re like uh ... love birds ... no ... Romeo and Juliet!” Elijah beamed.

Viggo looked at him in slight disbelief and Ian chuckled slightly. Dom, who was helping prop Elijah up, felt it was definitely time to leave.

“Ok Lijjy, you’ve definitely had too much, c’mon,” he sighed, rolling his eyes slightly.

It was going to be a long night. Dominic wasn’t a happy hobbit. Elijah’s drunken rambling had woken him up, only to discover his hair wasn’t all that tasty. He looked imploringly at Billy. Surely he could have Elijah slobber on him for a while? No chance. Billy was too sober to fall for that. Shit. He hated drunken-stupor Lij; he had a habit of getting way too over the top, too loud and too ... too much of everything. Damnit! Billy was a hobbit; it was his duty, nay, his responsibility to share their annoyingly drunk friend. Damn Billy for being smart. Grrr! Billy was smirking and this wasn’t funny! Oh well, he’d just lumber Elijah with Billy next time. Heh, that would teach him.

“I’m absolutely, positively, fine, and can definitely hold my alky ... urr, drink-thingy. Seriously, think about it ... Romeo and Juliet, Viggo and Orlando. It makes perfect sense. I’m drunk and I always talk complete sense when I’m drunk. Trust me,” Elijah said, a look of absolute seriousness plastered on his otherwise drunken stature.

“Alright, Elijah. Just how are Viggo and Orlando like Romeo and Juliet, considering one is actually a woman? Last time I checked both our lovebirds were most definitely male,” Ian leaned forward as if he were on the Oxbridge debating society, not entering into a drunken bizarre ramble with Elijah Wood.

“Oh come on Ian, you can’t be serious-” began Viggo. He felt Orlando stir in his arms, and Viggo cast an annoyed look at Elijah, who completely missed it.

“Hey, did I fall asleep?” Orlando asked.

“Welcome back to the asylum, Sleeping Beauty,” grinBillBilly. At Orlando’s puzzled frown, he elaborated. “You’ve conveniently woken up just in time for the great debate,” he grinned, while Dom moaned slightly. “Elijah believes that you guys are Romeo and Juliet,” Dom explained, rolling his eyes. “And Ian wants him to prove it.”

“Lij, I love you but you’re totally nuts,” Orlando ofd. d. Then a few seconds later, “Who’s meant to be Juliet?” he added, his curiosity getting the better of him.

Elijah sighed as if the answer was painfully obvious. “You are, of course. Viggo’s not pretty enough and you *are* like a woman – thin and stuff, except for the boobs, but you’re still absolutely gorgeous! Viggo’s more ... manly, too much stubble, and since Juliet isn’t butch, you’re perfect,” he beamed.

”Elijah, I am actually a man, you do realise that, don’t you?” Orlando asked, slightly uncertain. God knows what went through Elijah’s head sometimes.

“You wear a long blond wig so you could easily be a girl,” Elijah argued.

“Just out of interest, if Orlando is Juliet and Viggo his Romeo, does that mean he has to wear a codpiece?” grinned Ian, glancing at Orlando. Even though he was still rather sleepy, he managed to blush and turned away mumbling.

“He doesn’t need one.”

“Ok, enough teasing. I want some evidence for Elijah’s ... um ... statement,” Viggo demanded, his eyes twinkling with humour.

Dom shook his head; he didn’t see how Elijah was going to get out of this one not looking like a total idiot. Billy grinned as Elijah slumped slightly on Dom’s shoulder.

“They’re really pretty ... and they love each other sooo much!” he whined.

“So you base one of the greatest love stories of all time on the fact that they love each other? Good argument Lij,” Billy grinned.

Elijah shook his head, whether in denial or to attempt to clear it from the drunken stupor, no one was quite sure. The alcohol was definitely taking its toll on Frodo.

“No ... no, it’s more. They ... they have a tough time, thinking we wouldn’t accept them, ‘cause their love is forbidden, ‘cause they’re guys or something stupid like that. The families didn’t like each other did they? Right. Well, we aove ove each other but we could’ve been nasty ‘bout them and got them apart but we didn’t ‘cause they’re cool and we’re cool. And the whole love thing, Vigsy would have killed anyone who tried to get with Orlikins, and gets really possessive like Romeo did, y’know? He brooded a lot before Juliet and kept getting sad. Viggo does that and Orli is really young like Julie...et and is really innocent. Plus he won’t look at anyone else, ‘cause he loves Viggo so much and he’d drink p-poison for Viggo. I don’t want you guys to die!” he whimpered, ending his monologue sniffling into Dom’s shoulder.

“It’s so sad! You’re really lovey-dovey types,” he murmured, his words now horribly slurred.

Dom wrinkled his nose in distaste ... Elijah was drooling. All over him. Wonderful, just wonderful. It was obvious they weren’t going to get any more crazy theories out of Elijah tonight. Hallelujah.

“Looks like our little hobbit’s worn himself out. He’s growing up so fast,” sighed Billy, a mock sadness in his voice. Placing a hand on Dom’s chest, he grinned. “Look’s like it’s your turn to be Lij’s chauffer/babysitter, Dom. Enjoy!” He grinned at Dom, who let out a long-suffering sigh.

“You’re an uncharitable bastard, Boyd,” he muttered. Why was he cursed to be drooled on by a drunken Ring bearing hobbit? Obviously he was very, very wicked in a previous life. Maybe he killed cute animals or something. Yes that was it - in their past lives, Elijah was a gofer and Dom had killed him, hence he was now being punished in this life with Elijah’s never-ending drool.

“Aww, he’s so cute when he’s sleeping. And quiet,” smiled Orlando, as he nestled into Viggo’s arms.

“That’s not funny Orli. Next he’ll be asking me for his false teeth,” Dom groaned. “I feel like an old married couple.”

“Hey Dom? I don’t know about us being Romeo and Juliet, but you both look rather cute,” he grinned. Viggo raised his eyebrows in amusement.

“Something you’re not telling us, Orli?” grinned Billy, an eyebrow raised.

“Together, I mean. I like my men older and with more stubble.” He smiled tenderly as he reached up and briefly caressed Viggo’s cheek.

Dom, on the other hand, was not happy and looked rather panicked, as if the idea of being with Elijah was horrifying, which, considering Elijah’s current state, Orlando could certainly sympathise with him over.

“Oh God! I’m cursed! Doomed to be Elijah’s babysitter,” Dom moaned quietly.

Viggo chuckled and wrapped his arm even tighter around Orlando, providing a barrier to all who would seek to harm his love, including the insanity that was the hobbits. Orlando sighed contentedly, nestling in further. He always felt so safe there, as if Viggo’s arms protected him from all the madness of the world. He let his eyes droop again as a wave of tiredness swept over him and couldn’t repress a yawn.

Ian leaned forward as he gazed at the couple for a moment. Such a state of peace and trust surrounded them. It was quite amazing, as if Viggo and Orlando were two halves of an extremely beautiful whole. Their auras – or whatever you wanted to call it - perfectly complimenting each other.

“As strange as this seems, I think our young hobbit may have a valid point.”

”Gee thanks Ian. All we need now is to be sworn enemies and kill ourselves. How terribly romantic,” Viggo dead-paned.

Ian chuckled slightly. “My dear boy, are you forgetting the depths of passion and despair they went through? What is that if not true love? To die for love is no small feat. I’ve seen you together; rarely have I seen two people so committed to each other as you are. I have no doubt that you would give up your lives for each other. That’s a rare thing, very similar to a pair of star crossed lovers, if I recall.”

“They didn’t exactly have a happy ending Ian,” Viggo sighed slightly. For some reason, he occasionally became terrified that he would lose Orlando, in some way. Things were too good, too perfect. Surely happiness, or love like this, wasn’t meant to last.

“Not every love story ends in death, Viggo. Most of the great ones end in tragedy, caused by forces outside their control. It was never their love that was the problem; it was other’s interpretations of that love. Surely, you as an artist can appreciate that?” he smiled gently.

“Not if it means I have to wear tights and a codpiece,” Viggo grinned.

Ian chortled slightly. “Viggo, my dear, I think we all know who looks better in tights,” he grinned as his eyes fell on Orlando, who rolled his eyes.

“Ok, enough taunting the pretty elf,” Orlando warned, smirking a bit. “It’s not easy looking so manly in tights,” he added.

“More like impossible,” laughed Dom. “At least I only get hairy feet. Don’t the tights bunch up in your arse, Orli?” asked Dom, sounding genuinely curious, but Orlando could feel the humour behind it.

Well, two could play at that game.

“Depends on what kind of reaction I’m after,” Orlando smirked wickedly. “After all, I mean an elf can’t be shag happy all the time, even if they are blindingly gorgeous.” He mock sighed.

“I thoughts Elves were perfect beings. Didn’t know they could be such vain wankers,” Dominic grinned.

Ian and Viggo looked over at each other.

“You wound me, Merriadoc Brandybuck. Elves take commitment very seriously. My body may belong to anyone and everyone, but my heart solely belongs to Gandalf, and Elrond.”

At that, Ian let out a loud chortle.

“What, no love for a mere ranger?” whispered Viggo, kissing Orlando’s neck, who managed to stifle a moan.

“Eh, you’ll do. We elves have to make some sacrifices,” Orlando grinned, although his voice was lowered to a husky whisper as he turned and gazed at Viggo, seemingly have forgotten his friends. Viggo didn’t appear to be in a much better state either, and leaned in for a kiss.

“Well, I think we’d best be off. We’ve trespassed on your hospitality quite long enough,” Ian’s amused voice broke through Orlando and Viggo’s trance.

“Oh ... right ... thanks for coming. It’s been fun,” Viggo said as he lifted himself up, along with Orli, who seemed to be still joined to him.

“But you’d appreciate it if we left you in peace,” Ian said knowingly.

“Dominic and Billy, do you think you can help your inebriated friend to the car? I’ll drive you back,” Ian offered.

Stretching, Dominic managed to get a sleepy Elijah on his feet and Orlando helped Dom carry him to the car, with Billy joining them. Keeping his distance from a drunken Elijah was the best option right now. “Thank you Orlando, nice to know someone will help me carry Lij” Dominic said, shooting a mock-glare at Billy, Orli smiled while Billy simply snorted “you want help getting out of a burning building? I’m your man. Drunken Elijah? You’re on your own”

“We still on for tomorrow?” grinned Orlando.

Billy shook his head; it was unlikely Elijah would be doing anything tomorrow, unless they had any say in the matter ... which they would. Dom nodded with a grin on his face. Nothing like a little surfing at the crack of dawn to cure a hangover.

“Lij isn’t going to forgive us y’know,” Billy smiled evilly.

“Serves him right for drooling and making up crazy theories, although you would look pretty good in a skirt. We already know you look good as a blond,” Dom teased as he and Billy hugged Orli before he got in the car.

Elijah, who seemed to have woken up slightly, beamed at Orlando before he launched himself at the Elf, hugging him tightly. Orlando feared a loss of oxygen if he didn’t removed Elijah soon.

“I’ll miss you Orli. I love you buddy.”

“Yeah, me too, but I’ll see you tomorrow, ok? You have to go with Dom and Billy now though; they’ll take care of you,” he said as he gently peeled Elijah off him, handing him over to Dominic.

Orli grinned at Dom’s long suffering sighs, and Billy trying to keep as far away as possible. Tomorrow was definitely going to be interesting. After he’d hugged Ian goodbye, he went back inside to Viggo, only to be pulled gently into his lovers arms and kissed breathless.

“Hey Orli, want to see if we can do a non tragic scene of Romeo and Juliet? Maybe the balcony scene?” he asked as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Orlando simply purred in response, leaning into Viggo’s caresses and feeling the familiar rush of excitement pulse through his being.

“God, I love Shakespeare.” Orlando grinned as Viggo grandly swept Orlando up in his arms and carried him upstairs to recreate their own epic love story. Yes, life was definitely good.

****

Taking a deep breath, Viggo walked into Orlando’s hospital room. Dom was still there, his eyelids drooping. He wasn’t sure where Elijah was, probably having a cigarette. The way the kid was going, he’d end up with lung cancer by the age of 25. But Viggo didn’t have any right to throw stones or pass judgements.

There was no way Elijah could be dismissed as ‘a kid’ any longer, not after what he’d gone through, what he’d seen and had to deal with. Maybe he’d gone home; he hoped so but had to admit it was unlikely. Elijah undoubtedly would stay until Orlando woke up, or at least something changed ... either way.

Viggo couldn’t help but be amazed and awed by the friend’s dedication. He wondered what the rest of the Fellowship would do when they heard the news.

Viggo hadn’t phoned anyone yet, and he knew he would put it off for as long as possible. How do you tell someone that his or her friend has been abused for several years now and subsequently tried to kill himself as a means of escape? That wasn’t even taking into account Sonia and Samantha Bloom. They probably had no idea what was going on and that made Viggo feel really low. He knew he’d never forgive someone if they didn’t tell him something was wrong with Henry. They, more than anyone, had a right to know. But they’d also be the hardest to tell. Viggo didn’t really know the Bloom women; Orlando had never gotten around to introducing them properly before they’d broken up.

How would it look for Orlando’s ex to ring up and inform them Orlando had a) tried to kill himself; b) had been systematically abused for years; and c) because of Viggo, his heart had been irreparably shattered? What a wonderful introduction. No, he didn’t think he could face that yet. Not right now. Probably not ever. Yep, Viggo ‘Cowardly Spineless’ Mortensen, at your service.

Walking over to Dom, Viggo nudged him gently, tying to rouse the younger man. He and Dom hadn’t really had a proper conversation since he arrived. Viggo swallowed his nerves. He was a grown man, for God sake, with a severely hurt friend/ex-lover/would-be-current lover and he had to clear the air with Dom ... and Elijah too, if need be. There couldn’t be any uneasiness between them, for everyone’s sake. Dom and Elijah could still be angry with him - that he could deal with – but first he had to open up the lines of communication.

He shook Dom gently, not wanting to scare him. Dom moaned slightly, clearly not happy about being woken up, but after reluctantly cracking an eye open and seeing Viggo, Dom quickly found himself waking up fully.

Neither said anything while Dom stretched, trying to work out all the kinks that had accumulated in his body from napping in a hospital chair.

“Where’s Elijah?” Viggo asked at last, breaking the silence. Easy question to start off with.

“Hmm? Oh, fag time,” Dom mumbled, and then found himself embarrassed by the connotations of the sentence. “Cigarette, I mean,” he added hastily.

For the first time in what seemed an age, Viggo felt a smile hover on his lips, but it soon faded. There wasn’t really much to smile about; the reason was lying unconscious between them.

“I sent him out for some fresh air, clear his head. What did the doc tell you?” Dom asked as he lifted himself out of the chair that seemed to have moulded to his shape. Ugh, not a pleasant thought.

Viggo paused for a second, wondering if he should he mention what Dr. McCoy had said. Could Dom handle it, but more to the point, could Viggo? To tell Dom would be to admit those acts had taken place. While it was stored in his head, it somehow seemed less real, less frightening. The doc said she wasn’t sure how much Dom could take, and he had little doubt she was right. The lack of sleep and sheer worry was evidently taking its toll on Dominic, and Elijah. This would destroy them, of that he was certain.

While Viggo internally debated the issue, Dominic looked carefully at the older man. He was hiding something. Something had definitely happened in the doctor’s room. Just how far had the doc gone with details? While Viggo had never really looked his age, in a good way, of course, he’d aged considerably since he came out of that room, and now Dominic was feeling bad. He felt sick from lack of food and sleep, sick from the worry and terror he’d been through, sick for himself, his friend and Orlando.

Maybe he shouldn’t have been so harsh with Viggo. Yes, it was Viggo who broke Orlando’s heart, but he couldn’t control Mark’s actions. He didn’t know that Orlando still loved him, and in all honesty, Viggo couldn’t control that either. Viggo had been foolish, cowardly and to a degree, rather selfish, but he’d also had Orlando’s welfare genuinely in mind. He’d never hurt Orlando when they were together, never controlled Orlando. It was Mark who’d done all of that; Viggo was just a viable target for Dom to channel his anger at. Mark wasn’t here so Viggo had to take the brunt of Dominic’s rage, and he knew that was wrong. His anger was directed at the wrong person for the wrong reasons.

“Dominic,” Viggo began, and then paused.

Oh. Viggo had used his full name. Slowly, Dom looked up at him. The older man looked lost as his gaze moved to Orlando for a moment; as if his reason for living had been destroyed, which in some ways, Dom reasoned, it had been.

“I ... before I tell you about what Dr. McCoy said, I need to ask you something, and you have to be honest.”

That annoyed Dom. “You want to talk about honesty? I’m not the one who lied to Orlando, pretending the break up was for his own good, pretending I didn’t want to see Orlando, pretending that Orlando couldn’t cope with the outside world. Orlando isn’t a child Viggo. He hasn’t been for a long time. He was young when you guys were together, yes, but even then he wasn’t a child. He was an adult, he knew his mind-“

”Look, I didn’t come here to fight. I was wrong, stupid, cruel ... I accept that, but I can’t change it, no matter how much I want to.”

”Honesty. Nice change,” Dom growled sarcastically. He wasn’t helping matters, but he didn’t care. No matter how much he told himself not to be angry, he couldn’t stand Viggo’s ‘attempted justification’ for leaving Orlando. As far as he was concerned, there was no way Viggo could ever justify that, for ripping Orlando’s heart out.

“I was scared, ok? Scared shitless. Orlando was young and hot. Everyone wanted him ... he was getting so many offers. I though he might meet someone ... younger, or I don’t know ... find a better offer. I didn’t want to go through that, nor did I want the whole ‘gay bashing’ thing if we came out. It would have affected Orli and Henry, no matter what they said. I didn’t want to be responsible for stopping his career before it took off. So yeah, I was dishonest; I was cowardly because I couldn’t see any other way to stop myself or Orli from being hurt,” Viggo admitted quietly.

Dom didn’t say anything, but nodded in acceptance. He knew that must have been hard for Viggo to say and he appreciated it.

“Look, I’ve been giving you a hard time, awa aware of that. I’m angry with everyone, including myself. I can’t blame you for Orlando’s abuse ... that’s just dumb. You can’t control how Mark thinks, or how Orlando feels, and I accept that. I hate that I didn’t stop things sooner ... that I didn’t get Orlando away. I’m his best friend; I promised I’d look out for him. I’m angry with you for leaving, for ripping Orlando’s heart out. I’m angry with Orlando for giving up, for not doing ... something ... to stop Mark, and I want to rip Mark’s heart out with my bare hands. I ... don’t think I’ve ever hated anyone before, Viggo. But I hate Mark; I hate him with every fibre of my being,” Dominic paused, looking up at Viggo for a moment.

It was close to how Viggo was feeling. Undoubtedly, Dominic and Elijah carried their own guilt, however nonsensical it was for ‘failing’ to protect their friend.

“Dom ... what happened, with Mark. I have to know, please,” Viggo whispered, looking imploringly at him. He had to know how much they knew.

“I don’t know when it started, but I noticed things changed after the party, the reunion. Orli was withdrawn, tired a lot. I thought he was working too hard. Mark wanted him to stop acting; he got jealous when Orli made friends with his co-stars. He got really pissed off around Johnny Depp, the way they hugged each other and stuff. Then he didn’t like Brad, never mind that both are straight; he really saw them as a threat,” Dom snorted, shaking his head.

Viggo sighed slightly. “When did Orli tell you? About the abuse?”

”He didn’t. I just ... knew something was wrong. I remember seeing Orli in the bedroom one day. He had a massive black eye and was trying to cover it. Plus all the long sleeves and stuff. It didn’t take a genius to work it out. I couldn’t believe it, that he’d kept it from us. God, I felt betrayed in some way, hurt that he couldn’t, or wouldn’t tell us. When I asked him, Orli wouldn’t talk about it, pretended everything was fine ... a stunt accident, his clumsiness, always his fault. Same excuse every time; it began to really piss me off but I couldn’t do anything, he wouldn’t let me. When Elijah’s filming wrapped, he called in and immediately knew something was wrong. It took him all of three hours to discover what it was,” Dom paused, his gaze drifting back to Orlando.

“I’ve never seen Lij so mad. I didn’t think he could get angry, y’know’s s’s sweet and cute but then ... I was scared of him, scared of what he’d do. Christ, Lij wanted to kill him, really kill him and he looked like he’d do it ... like he’d do it and not care. And that’s what scared me. Orlando stopped him. He ... he didn’t want Mark hurt!” Dom bit out, his eyes clouding over. His mouth took on a bitter smirk and he looked up at Orlando and then to Viggo.

He shouldn’t be surprised. That was Orlando; he never wanted anyone hurt, even the bastard had had hurt him. Was that why he didn’t fight back?

“He ... he just wouldn’t talk about it, clammed up or changed the subject. I just remember him looking so ... haunted, so lost; he was being destroyed and I couldn’t stand that.”

“It wasn’t your fault, Dom. You couldn’t make Orlando leave, short of kidnapping him,” Viggo said, his voice gentle and soothing.

Dom shook his head vigorously. “He did leave once,” Dom sighed, as he looked at Viggo for a moment. “I forced him to. I was so scared that he’d end up dead,” he admitted, as his mind drifted back to that day.


*** flashback ***

Dom stood with his arms folded, a scowl marring his usually cheerful face. He hadn’t smiled much recently. Orlando didn’t look at him, as he busied himself tidying the room.

“You’ve got to leave,” he said, a harsh note in his voice.

Orlando didn’t look up or give any sign he’d heard, but Dom knew he had. He knew the bruise was there, no mr ifr if Orlando hid his face or not. That’s all Orlando did nowadays ... hide. It was frustrating to say the least; all Dom wanted to do was help, but for every wall Dom managed to knock down, there was another barrier, another fake smile, hiding the sadness, the pain. Nothing changed.

Sighing he tried again. "He did it again, didn’t he." It wasn’t a question and both knew the answer. "Where was it? The jaw, an eye, an arm? Doesn’t really matter does it? As long as he hits you, he’s happy. Why can’t you accept what’s happening? Fuck, Orlando, he’s abusing you, he has been for years! Why won’t you leave?!”

"He doesn’t mean to," Orlando sighed, not looking up. "He gets so angry he just can’t control himself."

"Oh, how sad, poor Mark. Forgive me if my heart’s made of stone. He never means to, does he Orli? He never means to punch you in the gut, or slam your head against a wall. I’m sure it’s an accident when he kicks you – oops, his foot slipped. He’s a grown man; he should control himself,” Dom said, his voice harsh and unforgiving. He had no sympathy for Mark. No one deserved to be hit, no matter what.

"I’ve seen what he does to you; don’t tell me it was a mistake, or that he loves you. If he loved you, get counselling or stay away. Look at everything he does to you! He controls everything in your life, and then when he’s bored, he kicks the crap out of you because something pisses him off. Well, I’m fucking pissed off now. You’re my friend. I want to keep you safe but I can’t do anything if you don’t admit what’s going on," Dom pleaded, looking at Orlando.

He was tidying the bedside table; no doubt that was something else Mark could punch him for. Dom ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. This wasn’t working; he needed a response, or some sign of recognition from Orlando. He needed to see he was getting through.

“How much longer is this gonna go on, huh? What will it take? Maybe a broken arm, or a shattered skull. Oh I know, how about your funeral?” he growled, fury welling up inside him. "Have any preferences on funeral arrangements – flowers, music? Because that’s how this whole thing’s going to end, Orlando. You in a box, and Mark ... well, one day Mark could be lying gutted in a ditch somewhere, and I doubt anyone will mourn him. But people love you Orli, we care about you; just let us help you ... please."

Orlando stiffened for a moment and Dom was hopeful, maybe he’d managed to reach Orlando, but after a pause he continued his tidying, albeit slower than before. This was impossible; nothing he said woulke ake a difference. He’d become a zombie and that scared Dom more than anything. Had Orlando truly given up? Did he think he was that worthless, that he didn’t deserve saving?

If only he could get a spark of anger ... something, anything ... from Orlando. Couldn’t he see this was killing him, that Mark was killing him slowly? Orlando would shake his head, try to smile, convince the world there was nothing wrong, but the press had picked up on something. Gossip columns had talked of Orlando being ‘over worked’ which caused his ‘tired, drawn appearance’. One had even suggested Orlando was bulimic.

“Orlando ... I ... I’m worried. I don’t want to lose you,” Dom whispered, a note of desperation in his voice.

To his relief, Orlando stopped his mechanical tidying. He slowly turned to Dom, tears in his eyes. God, he hated to see his friend so upset, but tears were good, even better than that smile. He didn’t even try to smile at Dom as he slowly sat down on the bed.

“I can’t leave,” he whispered. “He needs me Dom, he’s sick.”

Yeah, no shit ... sick in the head, Dom thought to himself.

Tears began to roll down Orlando’s cheeks and the bruised jaw was more pront tnt than ever. The cut above his eye would need some work as well. Drawing his knees up to his chest, he finally allowed the tears to fall. He hated hurting his friends so much - that’s why he didn’t look up anymore. He didn’t want to see the anger and sorrow in their faces, didn’t want to know he was causing their worry. He felt so selfish; Mark was his problem, he should deal with it, not drag his friends into the sorry mess his life had become. They didn’t need the worry or hassle. He hated himself for being so weak, so vulnerable. He tried not to cry anymore, it never did him any good. It wouldn’t stop the pain he felt, or Mark’s anger; in fact, it’d make matters worse.

Dominic immediately went onto the bed and gathered Orlando in his arms as he began to gently rock him.

Neither spoke for a while as Orlando cried quietly, all the fear pouring out of him as Dominic stroked Orlando’s head gently. He couldn’t be angry with Orlando, not really. How could he when Orlando was suffering so much? Frustration was the word. He didn’t understand why Orlando stayed; it couldn’t be love, surely? There was no way this was love, not on Mark’s part ... not proper love. Everyone had noticed a change in Orlando. Even when Billy had popped down for a few days, he’d had a quiet word with Dom, but what could Dom say?

Orlando had never admitted what was happening, even though the evidence was plain to see. He tried to hide it, covering up the bruises, wearing long sleeves, hiding away. He’d withdrawn from his friends more recently, and Dom had toder der if that was Mark’s doing. Was he really jealous of Orlando’s friendships? He didn’t understand that. Orlando was affectionate, yes, but he wasn’t a playboy or anything. Despite his age and his free, loving personality, Orlando had surprisingly strong views on monogamy. People seemed to be under the false impression that Orlando, like most young people these days, didn’t give much thought to an exclusive relationship, but it wasn’t true; when Orlando loved someone he gave them his heart. So why was Mark so terribly possessive?

Even as he asked the question he knew. It always came back to the same reason. Viggo. Ever since that reunion party, things had been tense between Mark and Orlando. Of course Viggo had been there, he was part of the cast, but Orlando had kept his distance. Even Dominic had noticed that. He didn’t blame Orlando; he didn’t want to imagine how hard it must’ve been for Orlando to be confronted with Viggo again. Mark had been like thunder after that and had taken Orlando home early. Was that when he started hitting Orlando? Dom felt sick. Sne hne had made a joke that Orlando was definitely going to get lucky tonight; he hadn’t seen Viggo’s face, but Dom had been worried.

By now Orlando’s sobs had stopped and he was simply curled up to Dom, barely moving.

“Orli? You’ve got to leave,” Dom whispered, threading his figures through Orlando’s unruly curls.

It wasn’t a romantic gee, ie, it was solely comfort. Despite their easy, affectionate manner, there was no romance in their relationship. Similar to Elijah, their relationship was a bond like a cross between friends, brothers and confidents. It would never be romantic love and people seemed to find that hard to believe. So did Mark, it seemed. He’d accused Orlando of cheating on him with both Elijah and Dom. By this time though, Mark had already accused him of sleeping with several co-stars, including Johnny Depp, who Mark had developed a dislike for.

Of course this was based solely on Orlando’s friendship with him. He didn’t like Johnny’s compliments of Orlando, or them laughing together. He certainly didn’t like them hugging. He also seemed to overlook the fact that Johnny was happily married with two kids. Fortunately Johnny had shrugged it off, although he was definitely apprehensive about Mark, and warned Dom and Elijah to keep an eye on him. Johnny, it seemed, had met people like Mark before. But by then Orlando had ceased to correct Mark, he wouldn’t believe him anyway.

It pained Dom to see Orlando so beaten. He waited for a response, a sign that Orlando had heard him.

“I know,” he whispered, pulling back from Dom slightly.

That was unexpected, to say the least. Orlando had never admitted his abuse, he never talked about it. Dom’s heart soared. Would Orlando let himself be helped? Orlando looked up at Dom for a moment and beneath the tear stained, tired face he saw his friend, and Dom wanted to cry himself. It’d been so long since he’d seen any glimpse of his friend. He was beginning to think Orlando would be forever lost.

“I ... I ... I’m scared, Dominic. I want to Mark to get better. I just keep thinking, if he can get help then things will get better ... he ... he’ll stop and realise what’s going on.” Orlando paused for a moment. “But it’s not going to happen, I’ve tried so hard. I love him but ... he won’t listen. He thinks I’m cheating on him, again. I’m sick of pretending, of fighting. I just want it to stop. Everything hurts so much.” Tears began to fill his eyes again, but he brushed them away.

“Just ... let me get you out of here Orlando, please. We cigurigure everything else out later. But right now, we need to leave,” Dom begged, getting off the bed.

He wasn’t sure when Mark would be back and he wanted Orlando long gone before that happened. Orlando nodded, not speaking. Dom let out an exhale of relief. Without speaking, Orlando took a bag from the wardrobe and quickly threw some clothes in it, not really paying much attention to what he was taking. It didn’t matter anyway, who would care?

Suddenly he stopped.

“What’s wrong?” Dom asked. He really didn’t want to hang around, and he was beginning to feel anxious and wouldn’t relax until he had Orli far away from this place.

“Viggo” he whispered.

Dom stopped dead. Oh God. Not now, please.

Orlando passed him a worn photo of himself and Viggo cuddled together, their faces beaming, love and happiness radiating from every pore. Dom felt his throat catch. Where had that come from? It must’ve been taken a few years ago, several creases making it look rather worn. Of course this is what had started the whole thing off ... Viggo. Even now, Dom was amazed at how Viggo had got into Orlando’s heart and stayed there. Orli never talked about Viggo anymore because it ‘upset’ Mark. He’d even distanced himself from those friendly with Viggo: Liv, Beanie, Ian, even Henry.

He knew how much it hurt Orlando. He hadn’t meant to cut them out of his life and even though he still kept in contact with them, it wasn’t the same, and frankly it wasn’t worth the grief Mark would give Orlando afterwards. They’d all been concerned over Orlando’s appearance. He thought Ian definitely suspected something; he was sharp and knew what to look for, but hadn’t said anything except to tell Dom to take care of him. Beanie had asked Dom outright what was wrong, but he’d just shrugged; what could he say? Orlando would only deny it. Of course, it didn’t convince Beanie, but there wasn’t much he could do. He briefly wondered if Beanie had told Viggo about Orlando. He wasn’t sure whose idea it had been or who started it, but Viggo and ndo ndo didn’t communicate anymore. Not since thartyarty.

He was somewhat amazed that Mark had allowed Orlando ‘access’ to the outside world. This really pissed Dominic off more than anything - the manic controlling. It was as if he viewed Orlando as his possession, his toy to mould into whatever he saw fit, and he would be punished if Orlando did not conform. He hated Orlando acting, his clothes, and his co-stars. He hated his friends, and he absolutely loathed anyone remotely connected with Viggo, or more specifically, anyone who liked Viggo.

When he’d read an interview where Viggo mentioned Orlando, he’d flown up in such a rage that it had taken Orlando two hours to calm him down and convince him that he wasn’t have a secret affair or plotting to get back with Viggo. He marvelled that Mark could be so blind, that he’d think after everything Orlando had gone through with Viggo, that he’d actually get back together with the man, although that would be ten times more preferable than staying with Mark.

His mind briefly turned to the media. How they were going to keep this secret was a worry; the last thing Orlando needed was the sodding Paparazzi hounding him. Usually Orlando managed to keep away when he had bruises, but on the rare occasions that the vultures did catch him out and about, he had pretended it had been a stunt gone wrong. It had worked at first, but some of the tabloids were already making speculations, some of which Dom didn’t want to know about. No, scratch that. He didn’t want to know about any of them.

As an actor, he was still as popular as ever, but Orlando had grown to cherish his privacy. He didn’t court publicity, despite what Mark thought. To have proof of his abuse splashed across national tabloids, or even worse, in England where his mum and sister could read it, would tear Orlando apart. He’d figure something out with Elijah; do some recon or plan a diversion of some kind.

“That’s what love’s supposed to be, right?” Orlando asked as he carried on packing, searching for various items. “All smiles and hearts. What a lie,” he muttered not looking up. “Why does love hurt so much? I don’t get it, do I have a ‘hurt me’ sticker on my forehead?” he whispered, pausing slightly.

Dom didn’t respond, what could he say? It was true after all, not about the sign though. Both Viggo and Mark had severely hurt Orlando, although in very different ways. Truth be told, Dom didn’t understand either.

“I want you to stay with me for a bit, or Lij. I don’t care which, ok? I just want you to be safe,” Dom said, his voice authoritative.

Orlando nodded as he grabbed his bag and took a last look in the mirror, cracking a wry smile.

“You think people will notice this?” he asked, motioning to his eye before he looked back at Dom.

“Yep. Which is why we’re out of here,” Dom said, as he navigated Orlando out the door to his car ... and to safety. Only then did Dom allow himself to breathe easily.

"He’ll know I’ve gone," Orlando whispered, looking back at the house.

"Maybe he could beat himself up instead, would make a nice change," muttered Dom. After all, who else would Mark have to target his anger at if Orli wasn’t available? Dom didn’t know and frankly didn’t care. For all he cared, Mark couldtroytroy the whole bloody place, preferably killing himself in the process. Orlando was away frherehere, and that was all that mattered. Right now their main focus was keeping Orlando safe and as far away from Mark as possible.

"Look, none of this was your fault Orli, ok?” Dom said, as they stopped at a traffic light. Orli didn’t respond at first, he appeared lost in a world of his own. He hoped it was nicer than his current world, but then again, Mount Doom would have been nicer.

"Maybe it was ... maybe I didn’t love him enough," Orli whispered, tears forming in his eyes again.

When did he become such a cry-baby? Mark hated it when he cried. Mark hated him period; he told him often enough, but then Mark didn’t leave him, he never abandoned him. He told Orlando he was weak, and maybe he was. He’d never be strong, not really, regardless what others thought. He thought he could be happy with Mark. Sure he had a temper, but no one was perfect, right? Maybe Mark did love him, after all, ‘you always hurt the one you love’. Yes, Mark hurt him, but perhaps with that hurt came love. Could it be possible?

"Bullshit," Dom snarled. "He’s a sick bastard who gets off on controlling you. All you did was love him. He doesn’t deserve you, especially not your fucking sympathy. For fuck’s sake Orlando, you did everything you could. Please tell me how you failed him, because I sure as hell can’t!" he yelled.

Norm he he didn’t sweart mut much, but God damn it! How could Orli even think of blaming himself for this?

"Look, sorry Orli, I’m not mad at you, no one is. We’ll sort this out, I promise. Lij is waiting for us. Think you can manage some pizza with two hobbits?” he grinned.

For the first time, Orlando smiled. It might have been small and slightly uncertain, but it was there. As far as Dom was concerned, that right there was worthy of a celebration.

"Thanks Dom," he said as he bent down to tune the radio, a lingering sadness still hovering about him.

So much went unsaid in that small sentence; both knew it was more than a simple thank you, though it didn’t matter. But Dom felt more encouraged. They had a long way to go yet. It would take a long time for Orli to recover, but he’d be there for his friend every step of the way, both he and Lij would.

"No worries Orli. That’s what friends are for, mate," Dom smiled.

Orli laughed and Dom felt himself chuckle as well.

*** end flashback ***


“So why ...” began Viggo, gazing at Orlando’s battered form.

Dom shook his head. Viggo really didn’t understand.

“Mark forced him back,” Dom sighed. “He knew Orlando wouldn’t go back willingly, he still had enough self-respect not to do that. Besides, he knew me or Lij would kill him if came anywhere near our house. So he used a little ... leverage. Us.”

At that Viggo’s brow knitted in confusion. “Hang on. Mark abuses Orlando, so he leaves-“

“He wouldn’t leave at first, he wanted to try and get Mark help,” Dom snorted, disbelief and disgust clear in his voice. How Orlando thought that someone like Mark could ever be helped was beyond him.

“You have no idea how long it took me to persuade Orlando to leave. Every time I saw Orli, he had more bruises or cuts, and every time he refused to leave. I took him to Elijah’s and told Lij not to leave Orli on his own, no matter what. I wanted to call the police but Orlando refused. He was too embarrassed, said no one would believe him, and since there was no restraining order, there was nothing to stop Mark from coming round here, which he did.”

Viggo said nothing but he felt his blood boiling, remembering Dr. McCoy’s words before. He definitely did not like the way this was going.

“He knew that Orli would be round at one of our places. He ... he thought Orlando was sleeping with us,” Dominic laughed incredulously. It was a hollow laugh, with no humour, no warmth. It chilled Viggo.

“It was so stupid; I should’ve taken Orlando somewhere else, anywhere. You’d think I’d realise it would be the first place he’d come, but at the time I just wanted to get Orlando away. I didn’t think.”

Dom sounded angry with himself, no, furious. Something that Viggo found he could identify with over the last few hours.

“Look, you were just trying to help, don’t beat yourself up over it,” Viggo sighed, and then cringed at his choice of words. Considering he was a poet, there were times that he could be so dumb when it came to using them.

“I mean, you did what you thought was best at the time, end of story. You got Orlando away from Mark, which sounds like a Herculean task in itself. You were there for Orlando, don’t forget that. You can’t take into account everyone’s actions and thoughts; there’s always going to be unforeseen circumstances-“

“But I should’ve seen that one coming! It was so obvious.”

“Most things are, in hindsight,” Viggo said gently. “God, the amount of stuff I’d change if I had the chance. At least you had Orlando’s well-being at heart; you took the only viable option. I doubt Orlando had anywhere else to go at that time.”

“He said he was going to go back to England. He really meant it as well. I really thought things would get better; Mark couldn’t follow him to England, but he didneedneed to. He used his best weapon against Orlando, his love. He threatened Elijah, me, anyone he could think of. His idea was that Orlando would do anything to keep us safe-“

”Even go back to him,” Viggo finished. Shaking his head, he clenched his fist, resisting the urge to punch the wall.

“And guess what? It worked. Orlando went back to Mark and the beatings started again. He refused to leave again - didn’t want us getting hurt.”

There was silence between the two men. Viggo’s mind began to reel. How long had Mark kept this enforced relationship on Orlando?

Dom went to sit down by Orlando.

“Fuck! He stayed with Mark because of me! Me and Elijah, we were supposed to protect him ... he’s our friend. I should’ve known something like this would happen. He was dead already; I suppose he thought killing his body wouldn’t make a difference, since he’d already died inside. Perhaps it was an act of rebellion against Mark?” he asked looking up at Viggo, his eyes pleading.

“Maybe it was Orlando’s way of fighting Mark,” Viggo offered as he moved over to Dom, pausing for a moment.

He wanted to offer Dominic comfort, but he wasn’t sure how, or even if it would be welcome. He settled for putting a hand on Dominic’s shoulder. It wasn’t shrugged off. For a long while the only sounds in the room were the quiet beeps and whirls of the breathing equipment.

“I called you because I know Orlando needs you. He still loves you Viggo, and you love him. He needs you to recover.”

The admission was greeted with silence at first, as Viggo processed the words and the truth that surrounded them.

“I’ll stay here, as long as Orlando needs me. I ... I’m here if either of you need me,” he added, slightly more quiet. He doubted Dom would be willing to accept his offer. Undoubtedly, he had used up all his credit in Dom’s eyes and was only putting up with him for Odo’sdo’s sake.

“Thank you,” Dom said quietly, which surprised Viggo, but he said nothing at the moment. “Thank you for coming, for just being here. I know how much it hurts you. I’ve been really harsh with you and I’m sorry. You don’t deserve that, you didn’t put Orlando here. I’m just so scared. Scared that even if Orlando wakes up we’ll still have lost him,” Dom admitted. “What if he’s never the same again?”

“He can’t be the same, Dom. Not after this, nor can we. Everything’s changed. We just have to be there for Orlando, let him know we still love him, no matter what.”

There was a pause for a moment.

“I can do that,” Dom declared.

“Things will get better, Dom. I’m not leaving, not now. I’ve run away too many times.”

”Time to seize your destiny, oh King of Men?” Dom grinned.

Viggo smiled at that. He missed Dom’s humour.

“Something like that,” hewerewered honestly. He’d ask Dom about the injuries later.

“I’m glad you’re here Vig, we both are,” Dom sighed quietly.

He knew how much the events had taken their toll on Elijah, and Dom himself was tired. He needed someone else to help, someone he could confine his fears in; he needed reassurance that Orlando was going to be alright, even if it was a lie. For the first time since his arrival, he was truly glad of Viggo’s company.

“Hey, Vig?” Dom asked, isinising it’d been the first time since his arrival that he’d used Viggo’s nickname. It felt good.

Viggo smiled slightly. Orlando had always called him that.

Dom grinned. “Think you can get Beanie and Karl to help us dismember Mark?”

Us? Was Dom including Viggo in that? The smile on Dom’s face confirmed it.

“That, you can count on,” Viggo said, andmeanmeant every .
.

And from the look on Dom’s face, so did he.

TBC in chapter 5

FEEDBACK, PLEASE!!!