Lim Aear

Author’s Note: Is anyone still reading? :-P

Please let me know if there are any mistakes in the elvish phrases!


Disclaimer: See Prologue.


italics: thoughts


[translations]


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Chapter 18

Legolas jumped down from his horse and turned around to help the injured warden down. He steadied him on his feet and motioned for the healers to come and check his wounds.

“Le ad!” [You (are) back!]

He looked over his shoulder to the source of the voice and saw Belwen emerge from the crowd that had gathered around them, throwing herself in Adanoth’s arms. She pulled away and searched for any wounds with her eyes.

“Le harnannen?” [(Are) you wounded?]

Adanoth shook his head and smiled at the elleth; he was glad to be back. Legolas approached them slowly, giving his two friends space to reunite with each other. The two finally pulled apart and turned to face their Prince, Belwen checking once more for wounds, this time on Legolas. She touched her heart and then his cheek in a formal greeting -in respect to his royal status- only to embrace him laughing, abandoning all etiquette. She was so happy they had made it back safe.

“What happened?” she asked them, concern written clearly on her features.

“The small group was a diversion. They set a trap for us, but they underestimated our numbers. Thank the Valar, we had no casualties”, he told her and looked around, his eyes searching for a familiar face. A frown appeared on his face when he did not see her in the crowd.

“She is in her room. She has probably exhausted herself to sleep.” Belwen explained and looked for any signs of his feelings on the Prince’s face.

Legolas tried to look impassive, but his eyes betrayed his concern.

“She was in a terrible condition. She has been crying continuously and hasn’t eaten or slept the past couple of days,” she continued, hoping to make Legolas understand that she still cared about him deeply, no matter what she had told him.

“She has brought this upon herself”, he said in a flat voice taking a step forward to leave. He would not allow himself any hope for her love again. He had been more patient with her than he had been with any other person and he could not wound his pride anymore; his anger seemed to return only at the mention of her!

A small hand grabbed his wrist and he turned back to see Belwen looking at him with sympathy.

“She thought she would protect you. She didn’t want to see you fade away from grief at her death. She never thought you would fade away just the same if she left you. Legolas, she thought she was doing the right thing.”

Is that an excuse for her lies? Legolas thought bitterly. Even if what Belwen said was true, he was tired of her lies and secrets! How could Belwen expect him to trust her so easily again? He was neither thin-skinned nor a fool. If Elaine was troubled about him fading away, why couldn’t she just TALK to him, instead of throwing all those terrible lies in his face! And by the Valar, had she deceived him again! That cold look in her eyes spoke nothing of her true intentions, only of a terrible void of feelings; and he was so fast to believe her! How could he have been so easily fooled by a mere mortal girl?!

“She has made her decision”, Legolas said coldly.

“Do not let your pride destroy your love, young Greenleaf.”

Legolas turned around at the melodic voice and bowed upon seeing the Lady and Lord of the Golden Wood, his anger flying away from him at her soothing presence.

“My heart sings to see you are all safe. Tolo, let us speak no more of the battle until tomorrow. You all need rest”, Lord Celeborn said and motioned towards the city. [Come]

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Legolas silently opened the door to the talan he shared with Elaine. His eyebrows lowered in confusion upon seeing the bed empty, when a soft sigh brought his attention to the armchair in the corner of the room. Elaine was asleep with a book on her lap, a small frown on her face. Legolas felt a tug on his heart, realizing he was the cause of that frown, but dismissed the feeling quickly. He was so confused. Never before in his life had his mind and heart fought so fiercely! He wanted to forgive her; to leave everything behind them and start on new, more powerful foundations. He needed peace and he could only find it in her company. But how could he forgive her so easily? How could he be sure she would not act so foolishly again and lie? He could not understand why she hadn’t talked to him about her doubts and fears, choosing to make such a grave decision by herself… A decision which was not hers alone to make!

Because she knew what you had decided and thought she would save you by forcing you to follow the only option left if she pushed you away: to forget her and continue your immortal life…

The voice in his mind made him freeze mid-step, bathing him in the light of clarity. Elaine had thought he actually had a choice! That foolish child! She had thought there were two paths in front of him to choose from: a life with her that would lead to his death and a life without her that would allow him to live forever; when the truth was that both options led to only one road and that was his fading! It is my destiny, Legolas realized furrowing his dark brows, the sudden thought filling him with awe at the discovery. He approached and kneeled in front of her, sitting back on his heels to watch her sleeping form. She was so beautiful. Not even the dark circles under her eyes made her any less beautiful to his eyes.

“Ël tithen nín”, he whispered and took the book carefully out of her hands. [my little star]

He sighed. The Lady was right. He should not let his pride get in the way of his feelings. He could now see the reasoning behind Elaine’s actions and he found himself admiring the courage of the young girl. It must have required a lot of strength to tell him she didn’t love him. He didn’t need any more proof of her love; the putting aside of her own feelings and needs for his good was enough. He looked down ashamed at himself. How could he be so quick to believe her and give up on their love? How could he not see it coming? He could hardly recognize himself anymore. He was so wrapped up in the tricky net of love, that he was acting completely out of character.

Elaine stirred and he brought his eyes back upon her face. She slowly opened her own to meet Legolas’ blue gaze. For a moment, she thought she was still dreaming, but his disheveled appearance made her realize he was actually back. She slowly slid from the arm chair to kneel down in front of him and touched his face to reassure herself he was there; alive and safe.

Legolas leaned into her touch and closed his eyes against his pride’s wishes, realizing just how much he had missed it.

“I’m so sorry.”

He opened his eyes at her whispered words and looked at the green eyes in front of him, shining with unshed tears. She sounded so honest in her apology; regret was evident in her tone. But she could be just deceiving him again… He had been quite sure of her lack of feelings last time, when the truth was the exact opposite!

“You apologize so frequently Elaine, that the word has started to lose its meaning,” he replied in a neutral voice, fighting the urge to wipe the tear that escaped from the corner of her eye with his fingers.

Elaine looked down at that and pulled her hand away from his face. What did you expect, that he would forget everything with a snap of your fingers? she thought in bitter realization. He’s not a guy like those idiots you used to have fun with, but a mature man with wisdom none of them will ever have. A man with honor and pride; both of which you have run over and trampled under your feet.

“You’re right,” she said in a broken voice after some moments of silence. “But I don’t know what else to say.”

She looked up at him again, pushing her chin up and holding on her last threads of dignity.

Legolas was amused at the sense of honor she held deep inside. If she had to face the consequences, she was determined to do so with pride and gravity. It was one of the things that made him love her even more: even though she was acting rashly and childish at times, she always realized her mistake and sought to fix it in a mature way without losing her dignity; such opposing features!

“You could have told me the truth,” he remarked in a tone that could not hide his hurt and annoyance at her actions.

“I have been hiding my true thoughts and feelings for too long to start talking about them so easily all of sudden!” she retorted in a defending manner and looked away from him.

“Then what do you expect, Elaine, that I will forgive you knowing you may face this problem again in the future?”

She had no answer to that. He was so right as always. She thought she had overcome her problem by telling him the truth about Justin, but that was never the real problem; it was to admit her fears and thoughts and feelings to him… to open up her heart to him, like he had.

“Will you not answer?” he prodded her when she remained silent for too long and gently turned her face toward him with his long fingers.

“I expect no such thing,” she finally said. “Actually, I don’t expect anything from you ever again. I have lost this right.”

Legolas felt the wounds on his pride heal completely in a strange way. It was good to know she respected and valued him, the same way he did with her. Maybe she had never shown any disrespect to him, but only sought to give him what she thought he deserved: an immortal life next to someone of his own kind.

“I am willing to let you earn this right again, but I will have you promise not to lie to me again. The only thing I ever asked of you was to let me look inside you and cherish what I would find; to let me love you and find peace by your side. But I am not a child to be trifled with, Elaine. I demand the respect I deserve and the right to be part of any decisions made that concern us.”

Elaine’s heart leapt at the word ‘us’. So there’s still ‘us’… There’s still hope… she thought feeling a little relieved, but not any less guilty. She had to wonder at Legolas’ benevolence. He truly asked so little of her and gave her so much… and yet she hadn’t given him even that little which he asked! She suddenly felt overwhelmed by the swirl of emotions inside her; there was no other man she wanted to marry. There could be no one else she would love more and no one else would ever love her like Legolas did. Many problems would come up, she knew that. There were so many differences that made them the oddest couple. But the heart is a powerful thing and we are all victims of love: she kept fighting against something she could never be a match for and failed each and every time. It was her fate; how stupid of her to think she could control it! And by trying, she had lost Legolas’ trust… but she was determined to win it back no matter the cost.

“I think I can do that,” she told him after another long silence and looked into his eyes. Her own filled with tears once more and this time Legolas did not force himself to remain unaffected; he returned her smile and pulled her in his arms, kissing the top of her head affectionately.

“Do not cry. All is well now”, he told her soothingly, as she surrendered herself to his embrace and held him tightly.

“I love you. I really do”, she sobbed on his shoulder and he closed his eyes smiling happily at the words coming from her lips.

“I love you too, ël tithen nín.”

Elaine felt him wince, his sharp intake of breath coming in a hiss. She pulled away looking him over with concern and gasped when she saw his blooded sleeve.

“Oh my God, you’re bleeding!” she exclaimed and got up heading for the bathroom to fetch a towel, when his hand stopped her.

“I am fine. ‘Tis a mere scratch”, he told her smiling and pulled her back to his arms.

“Are you kidding me, your tunic is soaked in blood! Come on, we are going to find a healer!”

Legolas sighed and shook his head, slowly getting up. That woman could be so persistent sometimes, it was truly annoying! He didn’t care about any wounds but the ones of their love, which he wanted to heal with passionate kisses; they had been apart for unreasonably long!

She grabbed his wrist and pulled him out of the talan, and down a set of stairs only to be pulled in a different direction when she reached an interconnecting flet.

“’Tis that way”, Legolas told her amused and she rolled her eyes.

“Of course. You know better.”

“Lady Elaine!”

They both stopped at the sound of Belwen’s voice, Elaine’s face twisting in irritation at the sound of the title.

Belwen approached them and took Elaine’s hand.

“You promised me you would eat when the troops returned!”

Elaine groaned.

“But Belwen… We have to go to the healer!” she told her and started moving away when Belwen pulled her back again.

“I am sure his Highness knows the way. You have to eat”, Belwen insisted and Elaine looked at Legolas for help. The amused smile on his face was not the help she was looking for.

“Go meleth nín. I was told you have not eaten for two days. Do not wear yourself out.”

She sighed and, flashing Legolas a smile, she let Belwen pull her in the opposite direction.

“Belwen?”

“Yes?”

“What does ‘methnin’… ‘melthin’…” Elaine struggled over the unfamiliar sounds.

“Meleth nín?” Belwen offered and suppressed her mirth to avoid embarrassing the human girl. She was literally butchering their language!

“Yes, that!! What does it mean?”

The elleth smiled. “My love.”


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