The Probability Factor

Chapter Fifteen-To Have and To Hold

Once I was naked, Haldir led me into the bedroom, where a slender bed lay open for our use. Haldir had pulled back the light covers and gently laid me down on the surprisingly soft bed. He quickly undressed himself, tossing the clothes carelessly near the door.

Crawling over top of me, he kissed every inch of my face while he said, “I want to make love to every bit of your body. I want you to know how much I have missed you and how much I love you. I want you to know I will never leave your side again.”

I pulled his face in line with mine and kissed him as deeply as I was capable of, and said, “I know.” I knew how much he loved me. He said it with every touch, every look, every action. Words were not necessary to express his feelings to me. I knew.

Haldir smiled at me, and moved down my body, placing kisses down my chest and paying special attention to each of my breasts. He moved slowly and with deliberation down my belly, and finally came to his destination at the apex of my thighs. By the time he arrived, I was completely ready for him. I was so turned on I was shaking. I felt one finger slid inside me, and then another, as he sucked and licked me into a delirium. I couldn’t have stifled a cry if I had shoved my entire fist inside my mouth. The force of the climax ripped a scream right out of my throat, and left me shaking like a leaf in Haldir’s arms.

“Oh. My. God,” was all I could croak out.

A rich baritone rumble of laughter bubbled up from Haldir’s chest, as he softly said, “I told you I missed you.”

I laughed softly, “I missed you and your magic fingers.”

Haldir rubbed my belly, “My magic fingers missed this as well.”

He pulled himself level with me and parted my legs a little farther apart. I felt him at my entrance, and as he kissed me, he slid in. It was a bit of a fit as I had not made love to him in six months and I had tightened up a bit. I sighed as his pelvis met mine. It felt like home.

Haldir began thrusting; kissing every bit of skin he could reach. I touched his face, stroked his back, and grabbed his butt. Haldir stopped momentarily, moving my legs over his shoulders, so he could go deeper. I groaned as he came into contact over and over with that internal spot. My hips thrust to meet his, as tiny cries of ecstasy were emitted from my throat. Haldir sped up his thrusting as I clenched my pelvic muscles in time with his rhythm. Pools of sweat from the exertion gathered between my breasts, my legs, and on my belly, as I lost myself in the rhapsody of sensations we made together. I felt like every molecule of my being had fully merged with Haldir’s, and we were essentially one being making love to itself. Then, I lost my sense of self and what made me an individual at that moment. Everything fell away. The room, the bed, Haldir, myself; everything fell away and yet was extremely present. We existed and didn’t exist, all at the same time. I felt like what constituted me had stepped outside the boundaries of me, and I existed and not existed, completely connected to everything all at once. An explosion of energy ripped through the universe, and I fell back into my self, letting the waves of the climax rip through me like a heavy tide.

Haldir collapsed on me, breathing heavily, before he rolled off to my side. I stretched my legs out and curled into his body, as the sweat from our skin dried in the cool night air.

“Did you feel that, when we were making love?” I asked, wondering if Haldir had the same experience as I did.

“Yes,” Haldir spoke softly, his breath tickling my ear, “It was wondrous.”

I nodded, and kissed his arm that was wrapped around my front.

“I believe we have also made the entire city aware of our love as well,” he remarked drily.

I giggled, “What’s that crap people say about time?”

“I have no idea, but I believe our time spent apart resulted in a rather cataclysmic rejoining,” he shrugged and laughed, “I am sure your scientists would want to study it.”

I poked his arm, “It was definitely worth studying.”

He kissed my ear, “It was at that. Let us rest now, as first light will come sooner than we expect.”

I fell asleep in his arms, as Roxy crawled into the room and lay down beside our bed.

The next morning, Haldir woke me with kisses, and helped my sore body get up out of bed. I couldn’t believe how our lovemaking had made me feel like I had run a marathon and then some. I was going to get into a pair of pants, but Haldir opened a wooden wardrobe door and showed me several dresses he had made for me. Matching shoes in the softest leather sat below each dress. I felt a mixture of gratitude for Haldir’s thoughtfulness and trepidation regarding my ability to pull off this complicated look. I now have maybe four skirts and dresses in my wardrobe. I am not the most graceful person, and as such, I usually stick to pants in order to prevent any ungainly flashing incidents. The dresses Haldir had made for me were long, but quite a bit of cleavage showed from the low necklines. I had noticed the women I had seen the previous night were rather small busted, so I guess this sort of décolletage wouldn’t be so unseemly for them. For me, it was another story. While I didn’t have huge boobs, they were a generous handful, and I was worried about the cup that runneth over. Did I mention that I was practical? Notoriously so. It’s why Alistair believed I would be more likely to clean my apartment than shag a cute guy.

Haldir helped me into one of the beautiful gossamer garments, and as he tied me into the dress, I looked down and noticed a difference. My bust wasn’t hanging out for all to gawk at. I looked at my husband, who just smiled and kissed me.

“I know you are a modest woman. I had the tailors and seamstresses raise the bodice, so you would not feel as though you were on display,” he caressed my covered breast, “Do you approve?”

“Uh, yeah!” I kissed him, “I was a little worried about being ‘on display’ so to speak, and the fact you remembered about my little issue relieves me to no end.”

“I remember everything about you,” he said softly, “I even remember that you do not drink alcohol, and I smelled that water you brought with you. It smells terrible. What did you put in it?”

“A water purification tablet. You can’t smell cryptosporidium, y’know,” I replied.

“Susan, you are in Arda. We do not have the same diseases as you do on Earth. And here in Lorien, the water is the purest of all. It comes directly from crystal clear springs that are completely safe.”

I looked up at him in surprise, “But I thought you told me that the race of men were not as advanced in terms of sanitation?”

“They are not, which is why I do not want you to visit their cities. You will become sick from their water supply. But in Elven lands you are safe to drink from any stream, river or pool,” he gave me a cup of water to drink, “Taste. You will not have tasted anything so pure before. Not even your bottled water is this clean.”

I took a sip. It tasted like nothing I had ever let pass my lips before. The cool liquid passed my lips and down my throat like cool liquid air. No aftertaste and the smell was vaguely sweet and clean.

“This is really good,” I declared. Haldir looked smug. “Don’t be so damned happy just yet baby. I’ve gotta say, not so down with this whole ‘chamber pot’ thing.”

Haldir’s face fell, “I know. We have not the technology for the sophisticated sanitation system you have.”

“Well remember, I am the person who has said on numerous occasions that if ever I met the chap who invented the flush toilet, I’d give him a bit wet one for making my life easier,” I said archly, “Or do we not remember the trauma I suffered from having to dig my own hole on overnighters when I was nine? Or the outhouse experiences I barely tolerated during the annual summer camp tradition? The fact that my brother and I would race to the nearest toilet the minute we got home, just to flush it and cry in utter joy?”

Haldir bit back a snort of laughter, “I remember your trauma well.”

“Baby, bowel habits are to be rushed away in a flash flood of water, taking with it the bacteria and accompanying smell. It is what civilised people do,” I said in a haughty tone.

That did it. Haldir buckled over in gales of laughter, “My love, while I know you are a delicate creature, I am sure you can adapt to the philistine’s lack of comforts.”

The ‘philistine’ did it for me. I should’ve never introduced Haldir to CNN. He had become far too adept at using other cultural idioms, and it was disconcerting to hear some things fall from his lips. I collapsed onto a chair holding my sides as I laughed. My husband just called me a snob! Delicate creature indeed.

Haldir snorted delicately, and held out his hand for me, “It is time to go to breakfast.”

I pulled myself up and took the proffered arm, and off we went to breakfast. I caused quite a stir, as I was a human female married to the third most powerful elf in the city. Haldir was the go-to-guy for the Lord and Lady, and from what I found out from translations supplied by Lady Galadriel, there were a lot of females who were pissed I managed to snag him. He may’ve been the head of Security, but I equated what I heard about what my husband did for a career with that of a Lord Chancellor or a Lord High Steward. I was amazed that a more formal hierarchy didn’t exist. I guess it was up to humans to complicate those sorts of things.

By the time breakfast was finished, I was sure I was a complete and utter failure as a wife, and I told Haldir as such. The look of rage that crossed his face made me regret saying a word about my insecurities. He looked at me, took my hand in his, and began to breathe evenly and slowly. His grip was just a tad too tight, but I figured he was trying to reign in his temper, so I let it go. He stood there, staring at me for a full five minutes, before he let go of my hand and spoke to me.

“Who told you that you were an insufficient wife?”

“No one, but that’s the impression I just get. That’s all,” I kicked the floor under my dress, feeling foolish for even saying a word.

“Who gave you that impression?” The words were forced out of his mouth with a steely calm that I knew could buckle with the wrong answer.

“No one,” I sighed, “I just…well it’s just that…Jesus Christ on a cracker! I can’t explain it. Call it a vibe. Call it bad mojo. Call it whatever you damn well please. I just know that I don’t measure up. I’m a common woman, and human at that, and I’m married to the third most powerful guy in this kingdom! God, if we were at home and you were Prince William; I’d be getting lynched right about now.”

Haldir’s lips formed a tight line, “You are a most satisfactory wife. You give me everything I desire and more. All the elleth in Arda and Aman could not hold a candle to the woman you are! You provide for me on Earth and request nothing from me. You give me anything I need or want without complaint. You have put up with all of my idiosyncrasies and do it with a smile on your lips. You love without conditions. You give whatever you have if there is need. None of the elleth can even come close to the person you are. You fit me. Completely. You have fit me from the first day I saw you on the road. I would not dream of not having you as my wife. You are my other half. You said that there can be no one-sided coin, no top without a bottom, no light without dark. You said that even when things cannot get worse, and you lose hope of finding your way out of the darkness, you know deep within that things will work out for the best. That there is a lesson in everything. That the cycle of life will keep going and you will find yourself again. You have taught me that I can find my way out of the darkness, no matter what, because you are my light, my top, the other side to my coin. You are a permanent fixture in my cycle of life, and I know that no matter what befalls me, you will come back to me,” he wiped a tear from his eye, “I am the same to you. I am your dark, your bottom, your other side of the coin. Just as I am not complete without you, you are not complete without me. Forget the petty jealousies of others. You are the only one I can see. They all pale against your light.” Haldir pulled me close to him and kissed me with every fibre of his being.

That was the longest speech I had ever heard him make. And it made me cry. I sobbed in his arms as other elves made their way around us on the walkway where we had stopped to talk.

Feeling someone waiting, we broke apart and I looked up. Lady Galadriel was standing there, waiting for us. I gave her a shaky smile and she took my free hand.

“It is time we had a talk. Yes?”