A Gift of Love

CHAPTER 15
What Will Be ......


The closer we come to home the more sure I became. Yet there is the doubt that perhaps it is what I wish so much for that my body has been deceived. I still consume the potion not knowing whether it was wise or nay. This alone troubles me. Searching through the remembered words of the parchment that had been graced into my hands, I take comfort in knowing Elurin and Elured also had little guidance for they were seldom visited.

Elladan still worries mightily for me despite his best endeavours to shield me from his concern. Although not noticed by many, each subtle movement of his is keenly evident to me. He stands a little closer in battle, is a little quicker to embrace me when all was done, barely allows me from his sight when we rest. In sleep, though he does not know it, his hand lies always on my stomach, fingers splayed in protection of what may rest there.

He smiles to me now as the mist lifts from the valley below and before us is laid out the splendour of our father's realm. Alone now, Elladan grips my hand as we descend. We have spoke little of this moment, only the need to return as swiftly as we may once our duty had been fulfilled and the men from the North returned before the snows of winter delay them overly. We both held silent on what we each want so desperately to know. Yet with the knowledge, certain or not, we would need to speak on other things. More practical things that would surely pain both we two and Ada. It will not be a secret we can easily keep overly long.

Elladan's hand slips from mine once we encounter the first patrol that journeys out to the borders. They bow in acknowledgement of our arrival and we are informed Lord Elrond knows of our return and the wizard Gandalf, newly arrived, resides within the walls . Ada will not immediately expect us before him. There will be time to wash and dress in other than our traveling garb. It would not appear unseemly to go to him first but our news from beyond our land is not so urgent, messengers that brought word of our return home would also have informed the council of what we have achieved.

At mention of the wizard's name Elladan looks sharply to me. I shrug, shaking my head. I do not know why he would make his appearance at this time. Perhaps....I shake my head once more, powerful though he may be, I do not think he could discern what condition he would find us in once we had returned. And yet the thought will not leave me that perchance he has seen something.

There are several elves in the stables as we ride in. They will see to the horses while we see to ourselves. I stretch as I dismount. It has been a long ride and muscles that have been idle for hours protest at their activity now.

"A bath,¨ Elladan suggests and I need no second option. A bath it is and a chance to be together for a short while.

Our packs and weapons echo as they are thrown to the floor once we are inside our shared rooms and the door is shut. Elladan strips off his clothes as he goes to the bath. Soon the room is filled with sweet scent and warm steam. I take a little longer to undress, ready by the time my brother beckons from the door. I walk into his arms and he leads me to the bath. The water is pleasant after the cold rivers we have bathed in over the last weeks and I sink into the heat of it, bringing my brother down to me. He runs his hand over my neck and shoulders as he has done countless times to ease the muscles there, but it is only alone in our chambers does that touch become more intimate. I moan softly as Elladan's fingers linger over my skin rubbing at the tightness he finds there. It is soothing and that combined with the herb soaked water, I find the tiredness of the past week descend on me. I vaguely hear my brother's sweet laugh as he bends to kiss my neck and lay me back against his chest.

It is late evening when I wake. Candles cast a soft glow about the room. I am covered in the thin fabric of the bed linen. Instinctively I reach out, there is something amiss and as my mind clears, I listen. There is no sound but the rustle of the curtains at the window. I look quickly around me, disorientated by the loneliness I feel. Then comes an answering heartbeat and almost soundless footsteps across the floor. A hand holds mine, a kiss is laid on my brow. I look up to see the smiling face of my brother.

I make a move to sit up for surely Ada awaits us.

Elladan's gentle hand pushes me back to the bed.

"All is done, brother,¨ he answers.

As I frown, he strokes my hair.

"You look so beautiful asleep, I could not bear to wake you.¨

He shakes his head when I ask if he has slept.

"I could not tear my eyes from you Elrohir, save when I was summoned to Ada.¨

I bring him down to me and kiss him.

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I surrender happily to his kiss, nestling into the space beside him on the bed.

I had not left his side, nor would I have but for the messenger that had come to our door with Ada's message. I had held him in the bath while he rested until I feared the cooling water would awaken him. He had not stirred as I carried him from the bath to our bed, save to nestle closer to me as I held him. I had dried us both as best I could before lying him down to slumber undisturbed. The chair I had pulled to beside the bed rests there still. I had watched the steady rise and fall of his chest and tried to see what the future would bring us. Tried to imagine how my brother would seem in the months ahead if what we both believed true indeed is.

I had not related to Ada anything other than the report of our hunting. That we had cleared the northern lands as far as we could. We spoke of the weapons the enemy had used and the skill with which they wielded them. We spoke of those know to him whom we had lost. Of Elrohir I said nothing more than he was safe, suffering no ill effects of the wound to his arm. Ada took that this was the reason for his son's absence and I did nothing to dissuade him otherwise. What else needed to be said would be in the presence of Elrohir.

Gandalf had sat in the corner, almost out of my view, listening without interjection to my discourse. He rested his head thoughtfully in his hands. When I made move to leave he gripped my shoulder heartily.

"Welcome home Elladan and to your brother. It is indeed glad tidings you bring with you.¨ I cocked my head in puzzlement at him but he said no more. I knew it was not to the manner of the orcs that he spoke. He turned from me with a wink to step closer to Ada to speak on other matters. I too turned with a bow to Ada and left them to their plans.

"Elladan?¨ my brother whispers my name. He looks to me with a bemused smile, it is obvious he has said something to me and I have been so taken with recalling what had happened as he slept that I have not answered.


Gandalf, Elladan, why is he here?¨

"That I do not know. He sits with Ada, they discuss matters I am not privy to, but,¨ I pause, then remember, no secrets, "he welcomes us home and is pleased we bring good news.¨

Elrohir studies me as I speak.

"To what news?¨

"I had at first thought it the clearing of the northern lands, but then there was a look about him that gave me cause to think otherwise.¨ Elrohir's beautiful face creases into a frown. I shake my head, "he resumed his talk with Ada and I had no chance to ask him his meaning. But Elrohir....it was not the news of our questing to which he referred, I know that now.¨

"It matters not, Elladan, we will soon learn what he and Ada speak of ......and we will soon learn of other things also.¨

I wrap my arms tighter around him. He is calm as he speaks, yet he shivers in my arms. I pull the bed coverings around us and watch him sleep once more.

It is late in the morning when we wake and dress. A knock to our door delivers Ada's message to us.

I sit with Elrohir while Ada places his hands on the flat of his stomach. My brother holds tight to my hand. He has been quiet since he woke, withdrawn as I have not seen him in the past. I know all his hopes rest on this, so sure is he that I fear his despondency if we are wrong.

Ada probes and prods about his body. I make move against this but Elrohir shakes his head slightly each time. He is in no pain.

The wizard sits on a wooden chair in the corner of the room watching my brother lying on the bed, Ada with his examination and I watching Elrohir. When I catch his eye he smiles in a manner that gives no insight into his thoughts. There are no others with us, as yet it has not been decided how any announcement will be made. Until that is done we dare not risk any nature of speculation toward Elrohir.

Yet I see Ada look up from where Elrohir lies to glance toward the door. He nods slightly, the movement of his head barely distinguishable. I turn from my brother to look upon a familiar yet unnamed figure standing there. He nods back with a faint smile to me and then departs. I mean to ask Ada who this elf is who seems to watch over me when other events overtake my thoughts. Elrohir cries out softly as Ada pronounces himself done. By what process he had employed with his skilled hands I do not know. I do know that Elrohir grips my hand tighter as we wait. Ada merely nods his head as a slow smile appears. Elrohir turns to me, pulling me close to him. There is a satisfied sound from the wizard who has risen from his seat.

I stare at Elrohir, a mix of laughter and tears between us. I hold his head in my hands and despite the openness of our surroundings, kiss him deeply. I hardly know what to say as we part, wiping away Elrohir's tears.

"I love you,¨ he says.

What can I say to this elf who is prepared to sacrifice so much to me?

"I love you,¨ I answer, hoping it is enough.