Life is Too Short

Life is Too Short

Chapter 12 – Starting Over


I slept for the first few hours of the trip while Haldir drove. I was tired, but that wasn’t really why I slept. It was a defense mechanism. I had a lot to think about and I hoped I wasn’t making a mistake by moving. By the time I woke up, we were still traveling through the desert but we were well away from Vegas and I began to feel better. When we got to Reno that night, we decided that it was time to stop and began to look for a place to stay. I saw a couple of older, small motels and pointed them out, but Haldir just rolled his eyes at me.

“I will not take you to a place like that,” he told me disdainfully.

It looked fine to me, but if he wanted something nicer, I wouldn’t argue. I was just a little concerned about the money, now that I was on a fixed income.

“You are not paying for the room,” he informed me.

“Stop reading my mind,” I told him.

“I wasn’t reading your mind that time, Sinda. Sometimes you are simply very transparent. I know that you are worried about the money and I don’t want you to do that.”

Apparently I was the only one that was worried about it, because he got us a room at one of the nicer hotels. In fact, he got us a suite.

“Haldir, this is wonderful,” I told him, standing at the sliding glass doors and looking at the view of the city below.

“I prefer the view you had, of the lake,” he told me, coming up behind me. He placed his hands on my shoulders and kissed the top of my head.

I nodded. I would prefer a lake view to a city view, any day.

“Oregon has many nice lakes,” he said now, massaging my shoulders as he looked out the window over my head, “as well as the ocean.”

“I’m sure I’ll love it,” I told him. I was probably being transparent again.

He put his chin on my shoulder and wrapped his arms around in front of me. We stood there like that for a while before I finally broke the silence.

“I’d really like to try out the Jacuzzi,” I told him.

“Would you like some company?” he asked, hopefully.

“I would love some company,” I said.

It was by far the most fun I’ve ever had in a Jacuzzi. We eventually got out and moved to the couch where we watched a movie together. We had never done that before and it was a nice change of pace. I loved the sex, of course, but I also enjoyed just spending time with Haldir.
We slept in the next day, not in any big rush to get back on the road. We would have to be there by Tuesday or Thranduil would be unhappy, since it was our night to share, but that still gave us quite a bit of time between now and then. Cutting across California, we spent a day in San Francisco, just playing tourist. Rather than renting a car and trying to maneuver the narrow, busy streets, we walked everywhere. By the end of the day my feet were aching, but I wouldn’t have traded it for anything.

That night we took a cab to a seafood restaurant overlooking the bay and it was the most wonderful, romantic meal I’d ever had. When we were done, I leaned back against Haldir in the booth and I realized that I could possibly spend the next ten years like this; enjoying life with my two elves. I was lucky and I knew it. I made the decision, then and there, to enjoy it while it lasted, rather than spending my short time with them feeling guilty about having more than one sex partner and worrying about not working. Life was too short to spend it feeling guilty. I would have plenty of time to pay for it later.

When we got back to the room that night, Haldir spent ten minutes massaging my feet and healing them from the damage I’d done to them walking all day. When I tried to tell him that other parts of my body also hurt, he fought back a smile and massaged them, too, though I don’t think he really believed me.

*********

From San Francisco, we took turns driving as we made our way up Highway 101 along the coast. I often found myself just staring at Haldir, when he was behind the wheel. He was such a spectacular sight that I had a hard time pulling my eyes away from him, though I mostly controlled the urge when I was doing the driving. Everything about him demanded that I look at him, from the eye-catching contrast in his light hair and dark brows, to his full, sensuous lips. Just the way he rolled his muscular shoulders when he’d been driving for a long time sent chills down my spine. Sometimes he would catch me staring at him like a lovesick puppy and he’d turn and meet my gaze with a smile on his face. It always made my heart race.

When we crossed the border from California into Oregon, the change in scenery was like night and day. In Oregon, he explained to me, there was a law that the beaches could not be owned by individuals, but were to be kept as public land. There were no fences chopping the white sand into little private sections, just mile after mile of pristine coastline. We stopped often to look for whales or just to relax together on different beaches as we meandered up the coastal highway. Sometimes we did more than relax.

It took us a long time to make it to the Newport area, but we enjoyed every minute of it. It was Tuesday morning when we rolled into town and Haldir took me directly to the house that he shared with his two brothers, anxious to have me meet them. I was nervous. I had read about Orophin and Rúmil, of course, and I had seen them both in the movies, but now I was about to meet the two elves in person.

We pulled into the driveway of a gray shingled house, high on a hill overlooking the ocean. I suspected that it had a wonderful view from the back and couldn’t wait to find out. Haldir took my hand with a smile and led me up the sidewalk and inside.

Both brothers were home and they each kissed my hand when they met me. I liked them immediately and they went out of their way to make me feel at home. While Haldir spoke with Orophin in the living room, Rúmil insisted on showing me around with a running commentary that kept me laughing. I was surprised to find that the house was actually much larger than it had seemed from the outside. From the front, it had appeared to be a single story, yet in the back, there were two levels. The three bedrooms were all located downstairs and each had a spectacular view of the ocean. Upstairs, the whole back of the house seemed to be almost solid glass, like the bedrooms, and I wondered how much time Haldir spent standing there, staring out the window.

“Shall we bring your things in?” Rúmil asked, when we returned to the living room in the front of the house.

“No, I have a room. In fact, I should probably take my things to the storage unit then go check in at the hotel.”

Nobody said anything for a moment as both brothers regarded Haldir with questions in their eyes. Haldir finally broke the silence.

“I couldn’t talk her into staying here. I tried to change her mind,” he sighed and excused himself to use the restroom.

“Thranduil?” Orophin asked me, after Haldir left the room.

“That’s only part of it,” I admitted, wondering how much I should say. “I don’t want to be in the way if Haldir has other women over.”

“What other women?” Rúmil laughed.

“The other women he’s seeing. I assume that he brings them here sometimes as well as meeting them at their homes,” I said, not really wanting to think about it.

“Sinda, Haldir isn’t seeing anybody except you,” Rúmil announced, confused. “You are all he’s spoken about since the trip to Michigan.”

I looked at Orophin who was nodding in agreement and then over to Haldir who had suddenly returned to the room looking very concerned.

“Rúmil, you have no idea what I do when I am not here,” Haldir said, agitated, as his eyes flashed back and forth between his brother and me. “Sinda, why don’t we…?”

“Haldir?” I asked, wondering what was going on. “Tell me the truth.”

“Will you stay if I tell you or will you run back to Nevada?” he asked, looking at me intently.

“Tell me,” I said, already knowing.

He looked at me for a moment longer before sighing and confessing, “I have not been with another woman since we were at the lake in Michigan together.”

I stared at him, not understanding how this could possibly be true. “But, there were several nights when you weren’t with me, when you allowed Thranduil to visit me. We were together for over a week in Nevada.”

“I visited the women I knew and I told them that I wouldn’t be coming back. I didn’t have sex with them. I had a lot of loose ends to tie up before I could give more of my time to you,” he admitted. “It is all done now.”

My mind was reeling. “Haldir, why did you agree to share me with Thranduil? If you don’t have other women, then I don’t need another elf. I...”

It took me a moment before it hit me.

“Wait, wait, wait,” I said, shaking my head. “Isn’t this very dangerous for you? I thought that was why you had other women?”

“Sinda,” he took my hands, “I don’t care how dangerous it is anymore. You don’t understand.”

I looked at his brothers for help, but they remained silent.

“They are in the exact same situation. Amalee and Neume have both moved in,” he told me.

“It’s too dangerous,” I repeated the obvious. They should all know this. Why were they allowing it to happen?

“It doesn’t matter any more,” Rúmil said. “We are tired of our long, lonely lives on this earth. We want to love and to be loved again.”

I thought about Thranduil and the change in him. “Something’s going on; something big.”

Haldir nodded. “We have discussed it and it is not only us. The same thing is happening to every elf we know. They are no longer fighting it.”

I sat down on the couch because I didn’t think that my legs would support me.

“But won’t you all fade and die when we die?” I asked them.

“We don’t know,” Orophin admitted. “Maybe. We don’t care.”

I looked at Haldir. “You intentionally kept this from me because you knew that I wouldn’t come to Oregon, didn’t you?”

He nodded, meeting my gaze.

“I can’t do this to you, Haldir. You know that.”

He sat down next to me and took my hand. “It is why I am allowing you to have Thranduil, Sinda. If I do not have you all to myself, I think that I can continue to hold back. My brothers are already too far gone for that, but as long as I am able to share you with Thranduil, then I am not lost yet.”

“We made a vow, not to give up our immortality unless we all do it, Sinda,” Orophin said. “Haldir is the last holdout besides Bálgin and Táurnil.”

Bálgin and Táurnil were the two elves that were both in love with the woman, Michelle. I let my mind wrap around everything I had just heard. Rúmil and Orophin were ready to give up their immortality. Haldir was too, but I wouldn’t allow it. By having Thranduil as competition, he was somehow able to hold back a bit. I wondered about the other women and why they were allowing this to happen and it finally sunk in. I had Thranduil. I wasn’t giving Haldir one hundred percent of myself because my affections were split between them, though not evenly. I knew that the others had been with their elves a lot longer than I had been with Haldir, too, and I was willing to bet that it made a difference. I thought about the fact that Michelle’s situation was similar to mine and it reinforced the idea that because we both had two elves, the attachments were not as strong.

“If I go back to Nevada, wouldn’t that solve everything?” I couldn’t look at Haldir. “You would break your ties with me and be safe. All of you would be safe.”

“That would destroy me, Sinda. I know how we feel about each other and to go through life knowing that you did this to save me…no, it would be unbearable. I sincerely think that Thranduil will provide that buffer that we spoke of before. Especially now, since your feelings for him have changed. If I know that you also love him, I can hold back my own feelings a bit. It will also keep you from giving in and allowing this.”

That was exactly what I had been thinking. “Are you sure about this, Haldir?” I asked him, ready to get back in my car and return to Nevada.

“No, I am not completely sure, but I do think that there is a reason for what is happening and that maybe it is not a bad thing. We all feel that way. It is simply in my nature to fight what I do not understand.”

“In other words, while Orophin and I have given in, Haldir is still being stubborn,” Rúmil replied. “But we made a promise.”

I thought about that and hoped that we were both right about Thranduil. I also had the very strong feeling that what he had said about something causing this to happen, was true. I didn’t know exactly what it was, but my mind suddenly drifted back to the beings that I had sensed on the bottom of the lake after I had drowned. They were part of it, I was sure. They had given me my life back after I promised them…anything…if I could be with Haldir. Maybe this was all part of the same big picture. I had to hope so, but I wondered how Thranduil really fit into it all. Something had changed and the elves were being drawn to certain women, it seemed. I was very anxious to meet the other women now, to get their take on this. I mentioned it to the elves.

“They are shopping right now and plan on having a welcome party tonight, if you are not too tired,” Orophin stated.

“That would be great,” I assured him. “We took our time getting here so I’m not tired. It’s just that this is Tuesday and it’s…” I shrugged, looking at Haldir. I didn’t know how much his brothers knew about our situation.

Haldir took over. “We have worked out a schedule and on Tuesday nights, Thranduil and I both spend time with Sinda. Thranduil will have to be invited to the party, too.”

Rúmil nodded and neither he nor Orophin seemed to think that it was strange. I let out a pent-up breath. Apparently I was judging myself more harshly than they were judging me and for that I was grateful.

“Táurnil and Michelle will be here, too,” Rúmil said. “I am not sure if Bálgin will be or not. Michelle was rather vague when she spoke with Amalee, but it sounds as though something has happened.”

“I really need to talk to her,” I stated. I was curious to see just how similar our situations were.

Haldir turned to me and kissed me now and it was not a light kiss. Orophin immediately took the hint and stood.

“Rúmil and I need to go down to the docks and buy some fresh seafood for the party tonight,” he said.

“We do?” Rúmil asked then caught Orophin’s annoyed look. “Oh, right…seafood.” He stood quickly.

I told them that I was glad to have finally met them and they repeated the sentiment. It was hard to talk to them, though, because by now Haldir was growing very passionate in his kisses and I had to restrain his hands from wandering over certain parts of my anatomy.

“Haldir,” I whispered, “can you at least wait until your brothers are gone?”

“No, I want you in my bed. Now,” he said, lifting me into his arms and taking me down the stairs into his bedroom. He kicked the door closed behind him. “I have waited a long time to have you here, Sinda.”

He turned on his stereo, allowing quiet music to fill the room as he undressed me, his hands moving quickly. When we climbed into his bed, I smelled the nice, clean sheets, though I could still smell Haldir’s scent in the bed or maybe just in the room. I loved the way he smelled; so much nicer than a man.

He was very passionate, almost aggressive, now that we were in his bed. I could see that it meant a lot to him to have me here and I was glad we could share this time alone together before everybody else came back.

I quickly lost track of time and my surroundings as he lavished attention on my body and I did the same to him in return. I couldn’t get enough of him. I loved watching and feeling his muscles work beneath his perfect skin. He was a work of art and I was his very appreciative audience. By the time he finally entered me, I cried out in ecstasy, glad that the waiting was over. It just never got old with him. I wrapped my legs around his waist, drawing him into me as fully as possible and when I cried out again, in release, I was barely aware that he had been marking my neck. He finally emptied himself into me as he groaned into my hair.

“How can it be so good, every time?” I asked him at last, reaching up to place my hands on either side of his face when he raised his head. “No matter how often we do this, each time is wonderful.”

“It is true for me also, Sinda,” he said. “It is because we are meant to be together.”

I wished that were true, and maybe it was, in the short term. We stayed in bed for another hour before we reluctantly dressed and left to take my things to the storage shed. I was happy to see that the movers had already been there with my other belongings and the furniture appeared to be undamaged. Now I just needed a place to live. We went to the hotel to check in and after entering the room, Haldir and I stood for several minutes staring out the window at the waves that mercilessly pounded the beach. Like Haldir’s house, the whole back wall was picture window. There was a fireplace and a Jacuzzi, as well, making it absolutely perfect.

“This is a bit nicer than what I had in mind,” I told him, “but I love it.”

“I want you to be happy,” he told me. “I knew that this room would make you happy.”

“You make me happy,” I told him.

He touched my face with his fingertips before turning to look out the window.

“It will be a long three days, Sinda,” he said.

I thought so, too. Of course, I would have Thranduil with me, filling the time, but I would miss Haldir badly.

“We still have today,” I told him. At least until Thranduil showed up.

Turning back towards me, he captured my mouth in a passionate kiss that turned into something more. We didn’t leave the room until it was time to go to Haldir’s house for the barbeque. I was nervous about meeting the others and a bit worried about how to handle Thranduil in front of everybody. I decided to play it by ear.

When we got back to the house, everybody else had already arrived and there were several cars parked in the driveway and on the street. Thranduil was waiting for us outside and Haldir kissed me briefly, telling me he’d see us in the house. I was swept into Thranduil’s arms where I stayed long enough to receive a very intense kiss. He didn’t seem to want to let go of me and his strong arms wandered up and down my back as he explored my mouth.

“I wish we had time for me to give you a proper welcome, Sinda,” he whispered into my ear. “I don’t suppose it would be appropriate to ask your Marchwarden if we could borrow his bedroom. Maybe he will allow us to leave a bit early so that we can have some time alone together before he arrives.”

“Go ahead and ask him,” I suggested. I wasn’t going to get in the middle of it – they could work it out between them.

He led me inside, where Haldir waited. Thranduil held my hand as I walked into the living room with the two of them. I was introduced to Michelle and Táurnil there, before being taken into the kitchen where Amalee and Neume were putting finishing touches on the meal. On the redwood deck, Rúmil was grilling some sort of fish, while Orophin looked over his shoulder, telling him not to let it burn *this time.*

I liked everybody that I met and was grateful for the way they made me feel so comfortable. Within a matter of minutes, I was completely relaxed as I stood with Thranduil on the balcony overlooking the ocean. He rubbed my shoulders as we watched the waves crashing on the beach below and listened to Rúmil and Orophin argue over the cooking of the salmon. Haldir returned shortly with a glass of wine for both me and Thranduil and kissed me before moving to stand next to me. I felt happy and comfortable with both of my tall, handsome elves nearby.

Neume called us to dinner before long and we went inside to sit at the long table. My seat was between Haldir and Thranduil. The meal consisted of grilled swordfish and a huge kettle full of fresh crabs, in addition to the salmon and all of the accompaniments. Orophin had made clam chowder, too, and it was the best I had ever tasted, though Rúmil insisted that his was better. There was talk of a contest.

I hoped that they didn’t eat this way all the time, or I’d be sure to gain weight. For the first time in my life, I was truly concerned about how I looked. I was afraid that any change in me might end my relationships with the elves even sooner. I didn’t think either of them would put up with me being overweight. That thought reminded me that I wanted to get signed up at the local Taekwondo studio as soon as possible and I decided that I would see if Thranduil would go with me the next day. I wondered briefly if my non-elf related activities would be a problem. If they intruded on the time of one elf more than the other, the one that got shortchanged might not appreciate it. There were so many little details that would still have to be worked out before we knew if this schedule would be the answer for us.

Amalee called us out to watch the sunset on the ocean and it was spectacular. I sighed as I leaned back against Thranduil and held Haldir’s hand. Life was wonderful. We stayed on the deck until the sky grew dark before finally going inside, where the others began to have dessert. Thranduil spoke a few words to Haldir in Elvish and the Marchwarden glanced at me before answering with a nod.

Thranduil whispered into my ear, “We can leave now, if you wish. Haldir will give us an hour alone before he joins us.”

I was torn. I had just met these people and was having a wonderful time being with them, but Thranduil had been very patient so far and I appreciated it. We said our goodbyes and I promised to see them all again, soon. I pulled Michelle aside and told her that I wanted to speak with her about our similar situations and she suggested that we get together for lunch one day, with Neume and Amalee. I thought that sounded great. Maybe they would be able to answer some of my questions.

The drive back to the hotel didn’t take long. Thranduil was in a hurry and he drove a little fast for my liking, but I figured that he had been doing it for a long time and knew how to handle the little Mercedes convertible. That’s what I told myself, anyway, as my fingers dug into the armrests.

He was anxious to get me inside the room and he grabbed me around the waist with one arm, even as he was kicking the door closed. His mouth sought mine at once, as his hand worked its way beneath my shirt. It didn’t take him long to back me to the bed and get my pants off, growling because he thought it took too long. To say that he was amorous would be an understatement as he took me five times before the hour was up and yet his ardor did not seem to decrease with each event.

“Thranduil, stop,” I said, needing a break. “What’s up with you tonight? You’re going to have me worn out before Haldir even shows up.”

He regarded me for a moment, frowning. “I don’t know, Sinda,” he admitted. “It seems that it is getting harder to be away from you each time. These last three days were very difficult. Now I feel like I need to make up for the time that I was away.”

That was going to be a problem, I thought.

“You assured me that if you had me for half of the time, that you would let me rest more. From what I’m seeing so far, that isn’t going to be the case.”

“I’m sorry, Sinda,” he said, running his fingers through his long hair. “I shall try to slow down.”

“Maybe it’ll be better tomorrow, after we’ve been together for a while,” I told him, hoping it was true.

“Maybe it will,” he agreed. “We can use this week as an experiment to see how it works out.”

He ran his finger over a spot on the right side of my neck. “I see that the Marchwarden decided to mark you. I wish for you to bear my mark, as well.” He lowered his mouth to the left side of my neck and began to suck at the soft skin there as he positioned himself between my legs once more.

We heard Haldir’s key card, but Thranduil ignored it, attacking my mouth once more when he was done with my neck. He was growing more persistent by the second.

“Stop,” I finally said, quietly. “Just for a while?”

He freed my mouth but began nuzzling my neck, sliding a hand down my body. It was obvious to me that he was having a hard time stopping and though I wanted to get up and greet Haldir, it just wasn’t going to happen.

“Sorry, Haldir. I’d get up, but I can’t,” I told him, from my position beneath the king.

“I see that,” Haldir said, eyes watching us. “It appears that his Majesty is in one of his states.”

Thranduil didn’t reply. How could he? It was true. I watched Haldir as he undressed. From the looks of him as he pulled his pants off, he was ready, too. Our eyes met across the room and when he lay down next to us, I turned my head to kiss him. Thranduil finally took the hint and rolled away, lying on his back for a moment as he stared up at the ceiling.

“Are you okay?” I asked, turning away from Haldir long enough to turn to Thranduil and kiss his cheek.

“I don’t know,” he said, still staring at the ceiling. Something was happening. We all knew that this thing, whatever it was, had taken hold of all of us and was not letting go.

“Something is happening,” I voiced aloud what I had been thinking, wanting to talk about it with both of them.

“Yes,” Haldir said. “We already talked about that.”

“But Thranduil wasn’t there at the time,” I reminded him. “Does he know about your brothers?

Thranduil slowly turned his head towards us. “What about them?”

“They’re both ready to give up their immortality to be with their women,” I said, watching for his reaction. He didn’t seem surprised.

“If Haldir is at that point, I’m not the least bit surprised to see that his brothers were there first. He is much stronger than they are,” Thranduil said.

I hated not being able to see them both when I spoke to them, so I sat up in the bed, changing directions so that I faced them, still in the middle.

“Am I the only one here who is bothered by what’s happening?” I asked, beginning to get stressed. Their lives were all at stake.

“I am concerned and I’m sure that Haldir is, too,” Thranduil said. “It bothers me quite a bit, in fact.”

We both turned and looked at Haldir who did not reply at first. Sitting up, like I was, he finally said, “I am fighting it. It is all I can do.”

I looked at Thranduil. “He told me today that he thinks that my relationship with you will prevent him from giving in like his brothers have done.”

“So it is up to you and me, Sinda, to save the race of elves in this world,” he said, eyes once more fixed upon the ceiling. “Does that bother you?”

“That’s a lot of pressure,” I said. “Why are you the only one who is able to resist the pull, whatever it is?”

There was silence for a moment, before Thranduil turned his head towards me again. “I am stronger than they are, Sinda. I am being subjected to the same pull, but I am stronger.”

“That isn’t it,” Haldir said, pulling me over to sit between his legs. I leaned back against his chest. “Sinda and I are fea-mates. I can feel it. I do not know what your part is in this, but you do not have the same bond with her that I do.”

Thranduil sneered. “The only bond you have with her is the one you created yourself, though you knew the danger! That doesn’t make you fea-mates.”

Haldir said something quietly in Elvish and Thranduil responded, rolling onto his hands and knees and looking like he might go after Haldir. I had no clue what they were saying, but I didn’t like the tone of their voices or the sudden tension between them.

“Stop it,” I said, looking at Thranduil, but speaking to both of them. “If this is going to continue, we won’t be sharing Tuesdays. I could always take a day off.”

Thranduil’s eyes swung towards me at that, as if trying to read me. He finally lay back down, on his side, “Do you love me, Sinda?”

He had never asked me that in front of Haldir and I wasn’t sure why he was doing it now. Probably because of the comment Haldir had made about believing that we were fea-mates. That had really bothered Thranduil and he wanted to re-establish his own territory, now. Haldir already knew how I felt about Thranduil, so I was free to answer truthfully. All of this rushed through my mind in a second and there was very little hesitation before I said, “Yes, I love you.” I reached down and put a hand on his leg.

This seemed to reassure him and he smiled at me as I leaned back against Haldir.

“So are you two going to behave now, or will I have to spank you?” I asked them, trying to lighten the tension in the room. Thranduil’s eyes blazed at the suggestion and I had the feeling that he might enjoy it.

“I would prefer to spank you, Sinda,” he said, running a hand up my leg. I hoped that I hadn’t given him any ideas. I didn’t think I’d enjoy it half as much as he would.

“Haldir,” he said now, though his gaze held mine, “what would you like?”

“Are you tired, Sinda?” the Marchwarden asked me. Yes, I was, but I wanted them both. I could sleep the next day, if Thranduil would allow it.

“Not that tired,” I said as a suitably vague answer.

“Sinda knows what I like,” he said, leaning down to kiss my ear.

Yes, I did. I knew that he would want me to use my mouth on him at some point during the night and since they were both with me tonight, it would have to be before other acts were performed on me. I had become very open-minded but I had my limits. We rearranged ourselves and I ignored Haldir’s erection that was begging for attention. I kissed his thighs instead. He had the best legs I’d ever seen. They had some meat on them, but just the right amount and it was all muscle. I loved the way I could make them tense up. I kissed and licked most of the inside of one thigh before jumping over to the other side. The whole time, Thranduil seemed to wait patiently for me, watching intently. I was surprised at his newfound self-control after his earlier behavior but I was grateful for it, too.

When I finally moved my tongue to the bottom of Haldir’s erection, I heard a collective groan in the room as both elves made their feelings known. Deciding that I had teased him enough, I drew Haldir’s shaft deep into my mouth and sucked on it, hard. He arched up towards me, his face a mask of pleasure and need. The mattress shifted as Thranduil made his move, spreading my legs and taking a position behind me. I felt his fingers slipping into me and I groaned, making Haldir react once more.

Thranduil wanted the same thing when Haldir was done and that was just the start of the night. I could tell that Thranduil was trying to hold back, but it was a battle he was losing and he wore me out. In the early morning hours, I finally had to tell them to stop, falling asleep almost as soon as the words were out of my mouth.

*********

They woke me in the morning, which was a first, I think. I was disoriented as I lay in bed, listening to the sound of screeching seagulls outside the room. I eventually remembered where we were as I glanced around and took in my surroundings.

“Sinda, we are going to look at a house for you, while we are all together,” Haldir told me, sitting on the bed beside me. I hadn’t remembered being this tired in a long time and I closed my eyes again. Telling them to go without me, I pulled the blanket over my head.

“No, Sinda,” Haldir laughed, pulling the blanket away. “We have already seen the house this morning and now we just need to see what you think.”

That got my attention and I finally quit fighting him over the blanket.

“You already looked at a house this morning?” I asked. “What time is it?”

“Ten o’clock,” Thranduil said, walking in with bagels, cream cheese and three coffees in a paper holder. “We looked at three houses and both liked this one the best. If you are not happy with it, we will show you the others.”

I inhaled the scent of the coffee and it perked me up a bit more.

“Are you awake yet, Sinda?” Thranduil asked me.

“Not really,” I told him, running a hand through my hair. “And I think it’s mostly your fault.”

“My fault?” he asked, slicing open a bagel.

“You wore me out before Haldir even arrived yesterday,” I reminded him. Haldir raised an eyebrow.

Thranduil glanced at the Marchwarden and smiled.

“Just wait until your three days are up,” he said, mysteriously.

“The pull is getting stronger, isn’t it?” Haldir asked. Thranduil nodded.

“I had a very hard time not driving down towards Nevada, looking for the two of you,” the king admitted. That didn’t sound good to me.

“I suspected as much,” Haldir replied, grabbing the cream cheese covered bagel from Thranduil’s hands and holding it beneath my nose.

“Mmmm,” I said. I reached for it, and he pulled it back, a smirk on his face. So it was to be a lure.

I covered my head with the blanket again and tried to go back to sleep, choosing sleep over food. About two minutes later, the blanket was yanked aside and a very naked Thranduil was lifting me into his arms.

“Hey!” I said, grabbing for Haldir but the Marchwarden just watched in amusement as he ate the bagel. I was whisked out of the room and into the bathroom.

Knowing what was coming, I said, “Warm water, please.”

“Will it wake you up?” Thranduil asked as he sat me on his lap on the edge of the tub and reached for the faucet.

“Yes, as long as there’s sex involved,” I promised.

“Oh, there will be sex involved,” he assured me. “But it will be fast. We have an appointment.”

“You should have told me that before you had sex with me for seven hours straight yesterday,” I said. He pulled me into the tub with him.

“That’s a slight exaggeration,” he said, laying down. “Ride me, Sinda.”

“No,” I told him. “I’m too tired.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Sinda, are you all right?” he asked, looking into my eyes.

“I’m just tired,” I told him, though I wasn’t sure that it was true anymore.

I looked down and saw how ready he was, but I just didn’t have the energy to do anything about it.

“Maybe you need vitamins,” he said, looking serious.

I laughed. “Let me guess, you’re going to offer to inject some into me.”

“Sinda I am serious,” he said, frowning. “This is not like you.”

As a distraction, I reached back and pulled the little shower switch, causing a rush of water to hit him almost square in the face.

“Oops, sorry,” I said, trying not to laugh. He didn’t look too terribly upset and in fact, he looked damn good. I watched the water run down his chest and had to do something about it. I repositioned myself and started licking the water off. He closed his eyes and let me have my way with him for a while.

He had to sit up, eventually, to give me room to maneuver, and after a few more minutes I decided that maybe I was getting a second wind. He slid back down in the tub, once I was in place, but it became apparent to both of us that I just couldn’t do it. He took over, grabbing my hips and moving me up and down on his shaft as he wanted. Even though I had done very little work, it still wore me out and after I came, I collapsed on him, oblivious to the water hitting me in the side of my face.

“Sinda, we need to get ready to go,” he whispered into my ear. I couldn’t move. I knew that I needed to and I finally was able to lift myself partially off of him, but I fell back down and didn’t try again.

“Haldir!” Thranduil finally called.

He was there at once, turning off the water and lifting me out of the tub and into a nice, fluffy motel towel. I wondered where I could buy towels like these, because they were wonderful. I slept through the whole drying off sequence and didn’t awaken until Haldir shook me slightly again.

“Sinda are you ill?” he asked.

I suspected that I was, but I wanted to go see the house so I made myself sit up.

“I’m fine,” I said. His skeptical look told me that he suspected otherwise.

He handed some clothes to me and I put them on without looking at them. I think I even got them on the right way, not that I would have cared if it had not been the case. I grabbed a brush and ran it through my wet hair, and it hurt. “I’m ready.”

We took Haldir’s car again, but this time Thranduil didn’t climb into the back seat with me. That was good because I would have pushed him back out this time. The drive was short and I was surprised to find that the house was very close to Haldir’s. I had assumed that Thranduil would want something more centrally located between the two of them and I knew that he lived in Portland, which was quite a distance away.

“I love the beach,” he explained to me when I questioned him. “I moved to Portland for a change of pace, but I’ve been considering moving back. This way I can be on the beach part of the time. Besides, later, it will be good to have you close to Haldir.”

What he meant was it would be good for me to be close to Haldir so that he could take care of me when I grew old. That wouldn’t happen. I’d ship myself off to a home before I’d let him see me age.

“You won’t mind the drive back and forth?” I asked him, quickly shifting mental gears again.

“What else do I have to do?” he asked me. Well, last I knew, he had kept a pretty busy schedule.

“How about your other women?” I asked him. “Will that make it more difficult for you to visit them if you’re driving back and forth twice a week? It’s got to be a fairly long drive.”

“I suspect that his Highness no longer has any other women,” Haldir said, getting out of the car.

“I doubt that,” I said, laughing. Thranduil did not respond. “Thranduil?”

He looked at me but still did not respond. He took my hand as we walked up to the door behind Haldir. The realtor was already there and she let us in. I wondered how much they had told her about our situation because she looked very curious.

I found that the house was perfect. It sat on the ocean, off of the main highway, and overlooked a small cove that whales occasionally visited. I knew I’d love it before I ever even stepped inside. Everything else that I saw now was just extra icing on the cake. It wasn’t very big, which was fine for me, since only two of us would be there at a time and when the day came that I was alone, I didn’t want a large, empty home to ramble around in. There was a small living room with a fireplace in the front and a fairly good sized bedroom as well, with a bathroom in between the two rooms. The back of the house held a large, modern kitchen with a dining area off of it. The whole back wall was mostly glass, like Haldir’s house and I gasped when I finally stepped into the master bedroom. Besides a view to kill for, the room was very large and had a wonderful bathroom, complete with a Jacuzzi tub.

“I love it,” I told them. Haldir nodded. He had known that I would think it was perfect and he had simply been going through the motions by showing it to me. As the conversation drifted to price, I left them to discuss it with the realtor while I went outside to stand on the redwood deck off of the dining room. It felt too warm inside and I needed to cool down. I got a little dizzy walking outside, but decided that it was from the lack of sleep.

The ocean was gray that day, with angry thunderclouds overhead. Some may have considered it a dismal day, but to me it was beautiful. I looked at the ocean and wondered how soon I could move in to the house, feeling like it was home to me already. As my mind wandered, I decided that I could use the second bedroom as a computer room and was already mentally arranging my furniture. Eventually Haldir joined me outside, standing behind me as he placed his hands on either side of mine on the railing. He rested his chin on my shoulder.

“Will you be happy here, Sinda?” he asked me.

“Yes,” I told him. I’d be happy in a cardboard box, as long as he was there with me, but this was even better.

“Hopefully we will not resort to living in a cardboard box,” he told me, reaching his head around to kiss me.

“How soon can we… can I move in?” I asked him. It was strange. I would have one of them with me all the time, yet they both had their own homes. It seemed like they should be moving in as well.

“It should only be a few days, since we are not financing the house,” he informed me. “Cash deals close much more quickly.”

“Great,” I said, excited about it.

“Sinda, your skin is hot,” Haldir informed me, rubbing his cheek against mine. “You must be ill.”

“Oh,” I replied. That would explain why I felt shaky, too. I must have a fever.

“Come with me,” he said. “We’ll take you back to the hotel.”

They decided that they would put me to bed and let me rest while the two of them went to the realtor’s office to sign papers. The realtor seemed a bit flustered and told them that it normally took a day or two to even draw up the papers, but Thranduil offered an extra thousand dollars if she could rush it. Her eyes grew big and she assured them that she would have the papers ready in an hour.

I lay down on the seat while we drove back and fell promptly asleep to the lulling movement of the car. Thranduil carried me inside and undressed me while Haldir pulled back the covers of the bed for me and went to turn on the gas fireplace. They spoke quietly in Elvish and it was apparent that they were worried, though I didn’t see what the big deal was, myself. I don’t imagine they had dealt with too many feverish humans before so maybe it was frightening for them. It felt nice to have somebody take care of me and this time I didn’t even have to drown first. When Haldir finished with the fireplace, he tried to cover me up, but I threw the blankets off, already too warm.

“Sinda, you need these on,” he told me. “The room is still cool.”

“It’s hot,” I argued.

He sat down next to me and placed his hands on different parts of my body. I assumed that he was trying to heal me and not just fondling me, but he didn’t seem to be having any luck. Thranduil tried but had no better success.

“Maybe some flu medicine would help,” I told them. Thranduil went to get what I needed while Haldir lay down next to me, watching me anxiously as I tossed and turned. He tried to put his arms around me but I pushed him away as gently as possible, telling him it was too hot.

“Sinda, I don’t like to see you like this,” he said, concern in his voice.

“It’s just the flu,” I told him. “I get it once every two or three years. I’ll be fine.”

“I don’t know if I should leave you with Thranduil,” he said. I had forgotten. As of noon, the next three days belonged to the king and I wouldn’t see Haldir for a while. I reached out to him despite how hot I was. I didn’t want him to leave. Maybe I was just overemotional because of being sick, but I felt like crying.

“I wish we could all move in together,” I told him, “but I guess that wouldn’t work.”

He never did respond to the comment but he held me closer, despite the heat radiating from my body. I rested in his arms until Thranduil returned and started giving instructions as to what medicine I should take and how often, as well as how many liquids I needed. He had had quite a conversation with the pharmacist, from the sounds of it. I just hoped that he hadn’t asked any unusual questions. I could picture him interrogating the pharmacist as to what one would give to a mortal with the flu. I took the little plastic cup of medicine he offered and gagged it down before drinking a glass of apple juice.

“I am not sure we should leave you while we meet with the realtor,” Haldir said, stroking my hair softly.

“Haldir, I’ve never had anybody stay with me before when I’ve been sick. I’ll survive. I just need to rest.”

They finally left, promising to hurry back, and I fell asleep at once. I dreamed while they were gone. I was under the water again, at the bottom of the lake, and I had made a deal. It was all so clear now, like it was actually happening again. This time, though, when the mysterious beings asked what I would give to be with Haldir and I told them that I would give anything, they questioned me.

“Anything?” one of the voices asked.

“Yes, anything,” I said, knowing that I didn’t have much to give.

“But you do,” they told me.

A picture of Thranduil flashed through my mind and I felt a moment of dread. Give up Thranduil? I didn’t want to do that, but if it meant having a life with Haldir, I would.

“Yes, I’ll give up Thranduil if it means that Haldir and I can be together,” I told them.

“For your lifetime,” the second voice, a female voice pointed out.

“No!” I said beginning to grow agitated. That wasn’t right. I could have that right now if I wanted so they weren’t giving me anything. “No, not just for my lifetime. That’s not what I want.”

The voice questioned me. “Would you prefer to see him go through eternity alone?”

I began to cry. “Yes. I won’t be responsible for his death.”

“He has already made his decision,” the male voice said. “The rest is up to you. You are the only one that can stop him.”

“Then we will never be together,” I said, agonized, “because I won’t let him do it!”

“The time will come when you will have to be strong enough to stop him,” the voice said, already fading away.

Then there was no hope for us, I thought. They had led me to believe that Haldir and I had a chance to be together if I would make a sacrifice, but it was not true. I began to cry in despair as the mysterious beings left me alone on the bottom of the lake once more. My lungs began to ache and I knew that I was drowning, all over again.

Strong arms suddenly enfolded me.

“Sinda,” Haldir said urgently, as he pulled me into his arms, “you are dreaming.”

I gasped for breath as I began to wake up, slowly becoming aware that I was back in the hotel room and not beneath the murky surface of the lake. I sucked in a couple more breaths, as the panic began to fade.

“Sinda!” he said, not understanding what was wrong.

I focused on him, aware that he was there with me.

“I won’t let you do it, Haldir!” I told him, still agitated. “Do you hear me?”

“Do what?” he asked, baffled by my words and actions.

“They said that you had already made your decision,” I accused him.

“Who said this?” he asked, glancing quickly at Thranduil.

“They did,” I told him, beginning to feel stupid. I tried to explain the dream to him but he assured me that that was all it had been – just a dream. He said that he had made no promises yet.

“Yet,” Thranduil said, touching the side of my face with the back of his hand. “I think that is the key word. You are still hot, Sinda.”

“I feel better,” I lied.

“No, you don’t,” he countered. He poured me another eight ounce glass of apple juice and made me drink it.

“Haldir, tell him that I’m not thirsty,” I pleaded, hoping to win him over to my side.

“Sinda, Thranduil spoke with the pharmacist and was told exactly how many fluids you need and what sort of medicine,” Haldir said, not coming to my rescue at all.

“Great. He’ll probably measure the fluids, too,” I muttered under my breath. I glanced over to see that he was, indeed, washing out the measuring cup as I spoke. He looked at me, offended and I laughed, but then I couldn’t stop laughing for a while and I think it upset Haldir.

He spoke rapidly in Elvish to Thranduil who seemed to be trying to calm him down and I hoped they weren’t going to start arguing. I wasn’t in the mood for it and I was starting to get cold. I crawled out of Haldir’s arms and back under the covers, though he tried to hang onto me. While it had been too hot earlier, now there weren’t enough blankets and I was getting the shakes, my teeth chattering. Haldir lifted the blankets and looked at me.

“Quit it!” I said, grabbing the edge of the comforter and pulling it over my face. “You’re stealing my warm air.” Now I had to breathe under the covers for a while to make it warm again. I felt Haldir’s weight leave the bed and then he was wrapping me in the blankets and lifting me.

He carried me over to the chair by the fireplace and kicking the chair around with his foot, he sat down with me on his lap. “Is this better?” he asked, still looking worried.

The fire was warm, but my teeth were still chattering.

“Closer,” I told him. He obliged me though I could see sweat trickling down his forehead from the heat.

“I don’t think that I should leave when she is ill like this,” Haldir told Thranduil, tersely.

“I can care for her,” Thranduil said, organizing his collection of medicines and juices on the dresser top. “I will call you if she needs anything that I cannot give her.”

“And you will allow her to rest?” Haldir asked.

Thranduil stared at the other elf. “I can control my impulses.”

“That is not how it appeared when I arrived last night,” Haldir reminded him.

“She wasn’t ill at the time,” Thranduil replied, testily. “I will do nothing to put Sinda in danger.”

Haldir just stared at him and Thranduil stared back.

“Three days, Haldir, and we shall see how well you do,” Thranduil said, his voice sounding dark.

“I do not doubt that it will be difficult,” Haldir said. “It is why I am concerned about leaving her alone with you.”

“Don’t be,” Thranduil said, angrily. “It is past noon. I believe it is time for you to go, now.”

I didn’t want Haldir to go. Besides not wanting to be away from him, I just knew that Thranduil was going to keep forcing me to drink juice and take medicine.

“You need the medicine and fluids,” Haldir told me, kissing my forehead.

Darn. I had forgotten to shield my thoughts. Must be the fever, I decided.

“Call me if you need anything, Sinda,” Haldir said, touching his lips to mine before reluctantly handing me off to the king.

“She will be fine,” Thranduil insisted, sitting down in the chair that Haldir had just vacated.

Haldir made a point of leaning over to give me another long kiss, which Thranduil didn’t appreciate, but tolerated. I watched him walk out the door and had to shield my sadness from Thranduil. We sat in silence for a while after the door closed, listening to the crackling of the fire.

“Tell me about you son,” I said at last. We had never really had the long, personal talks that Haldir and I did. I had wondered about Thranduil’s life often, but it seemed that when we were together we were busy doing things besides talking. He looked at me now and smiled before returning his gaze to the fire. For the next hour or so, he told me stories of his life, mostly dealing with his son. He also spoke of the elleth who had given birth to Legolas.

“Were you bound to each other?” I asked, a little confused about the whole binding thing.

“No,” he said. “I should have bound myself to her, but I did not. It is one of my many regrets. I was enjoying the freedom of being in a position of great power with many elleths at my beck and call. It wasn’t until the last ship had sailed and I had decided to stay behind that I realized I should have made that commitment to her. By that time, it was too late.”

“I’m sorry,” I told him.

“Don’t be,” he said. “It was a long time ago.”

I fell asleep in his arms by the fire and this time I did not dream.

~~To be continued~~