Friendly Wagers
folder
+Third Age › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
7
Views:
5,492
Reviews:
26
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
+Third Age › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
7
Views:
5,492
Reviews:
26
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
The Challenge
Title:Friendly Wagers
Chapter One : The Challenge
Authors: Zhie, Maggie, and various others who offered a line or two
E-mail: Bubastis_Zagazig@msn.com ;
TragicAntigone@aol.com
Feedback: Much too proud to ask for it, but we'll take it when given
freely.
Type: Romantic Comedy, with various Dramatic situations
Archive: Sure, as long as we know where it's taking up residence.
Rating: G to NC-17, depending on the chapter
Pairing: Haldir/? (All kinf Haf Haldir loving going on...or Haldir lusting,
depending on the case...and on occasion, some Haldir friendliness, if the loving
& lusting goes awry.)
Warning: We are silly elves. Our stories get silly sometimes. Deal,
or don't read them. ;)
Disclaimers: These aren't our characters, but boy, oh boy, do we ever wish they
were! Of course, then we'd likely never leave our talans, and just sit
around playing strip monopoly with a few of them all the time, drinking fey wine
and making bad orc jokes...so, it's probably a good thing we don't own
them.
Notes:
I did not plan to ever write and LOTR fan fiction, in fact, I meant not
to. But then this challenge was
posted, and then I shared the info about it with my sisters, and before I knew
it, we were driving down the highway plotting this story.
I apologize for any mistakes; much of this was written at 35 miles an
hour in a Corolla. Due to the fact
that we have neither the time nor the skill required to translate into Elvish
that which we wished to, pretend that everything you read <that looks like
this> is written in the beautiful language of the elves.
This isn’t entirely consistent with the book, nor does it jive
completely with the movie, or even the cartoons, for that matter.
We’re just taking what we like and throwing it in.
Beta Reader: Monty (Sorta, since she's more like an Omega Reader after we've
gone through it the number of times we have.)
Chapter One
Legolas learned back in his chair, a thoughtful look plaguing his features. Gimli contemplated it while chewing not so thoughtfully on a lamb’s leg. The King of Gondor let a grin playfully drift across his face before taking a long puff of his pipe. “Then, perhaps neither answer suits him.” Aragorn said, offering a third solution.
“You mean to say he doesn’t do anythin’?” Gimli asked, an eyebrow raised.
The elf smirked. “He means to say the Galadrim has no preference, my friend.”
“Pahhh!” Gimli lifted his mug, drank deeply, and set it down with a flourish. “You could see right well that the man, eh, the elf, was more than a wee bit more interested in those of the male persuasion. You cannot tell me you didn’t notice it.”
Aragorn gave the dwarsligslight nod, and then glanced over to Legolas. “You wish for my opinion?” the elf cocked his head, amused. Aragorn nodded again, grinning lips nearly dropping the pipe from his mouth. “It is my belief that Haldir of Lorien acts upon the same…interests as the rest of us.”
Removing the pipe, Aragorn chuckled. “It seems, my friends, you disagree upon this subject.”
The three were sitting around a table in the rear of a pub on the outskirts of Gondor. Now anain,ain, in order to get away from daily kingly life, Elessar would have his court informed that he was ill, and away he went, for a few days or so, normally accompanied by his two companions. Elessar would become Aragorn once again, and the three would spend the time on a hunt, or camping in discrete locations. Or, sitting around an old wooden bar table, discussing the sexual orientation of elves they knew. Good, old-fashioned male bonding, one might say.
“There is no disagreement.” Grunted Gimli, wiping the back of his sleeve along his moist beard. “The elf is clearly mistaken.”
“Most assuredly, master dwarf, I am not!” Legolas defended, a bit more aggressively than he’d planned.
“Don’t you get snippy with me, master elf!” Gimli snorted. “What makes you so sure that Haldir fellow isn’t interested in males?”
“What makes you so sure he is?” Legolas countered, adding, “Or do you have some knowledge we do not?”
“What is that supposed to…whoa, ho, ho! – take that back!” Gimli warned, reaching for his axe, as a smug elf darted out of range of the weapon and be the the silent ranger’s chair, placing Aragorn between the two.
“My good friends,” Aragorn began, a playful look dancing in his eyes, “might I offer to you a suggestion?”
When neither answered, Aragorn took the opportunity to continue speaking. “What if we were to make a wager amongst ourselves?”
“A wager?” repeated the dwarf, interested in the prospect of financial gain.
“A wager, yes, a friendly wager, of course.” Aragorn paused. “But, no, tis folly.” He returned to his pipe.
“” Legolas slowly returned to his seat, resting his elbows on the table and his head in his hands. “What is on your mind, Aragorn?”
The ranger again waited until he had grasped their full attention, then the smile crept back, and he could wait no longer. “If you both have such great convictions, there would be but one way to resolve such a dispute. One of you will have to prove the other wrong.”
Gimli hoisted his mug into the air. “An interesting challenge, Lord Aragorn. I am willing to accept such a contest, that is, if you aren’t troubled by the fact I shall best you, master elf.” Gimli’s smirking caused more of the ale to flow into his beard than into his mouth, but this seemed to concern him little as he set his mug down and awaited an answer.
“And when it is known that I am correct and you are not, master dwarf,” said Legolas, staring with disdain as the soggy looking elf, “I should like to see that infernal beard of yours shaved clean as my prize!” Legolas bit his lip, then, knowing he’d spoken more of his mind than intended.
“And I,” stated the dwarf, regarding Legolas, “would take for my prize not three golden strands from your head, but the entire braid!”
Aragorn frowned, and was about to make an attempt to stop the competition before it began, but once Gimli and Legolas had firmly shaken hands, he leisurely slumped back into his seat. Gimli was drunk, Legolas seemed to be – perhaps by morning both would forget such a transaction had occurred. If not, there was little possibility that such a point could be proven. So many of the elves had already traveled across the sea, he doubted Haldir was still even in Arda. Aragorn took a long drag on the pipe, closed his eyes, and hoped beyond all hope he hadn’t become involved in another war.
Chapter One : The Challenge
Authors: Zhie, Maggie, and various others who offered a line or two
E-mail: Bubastis_Zagazig@msn.com ;
TragicAntigone@aol.com
Feedback: Much too proud to ask for it, but we'll take it when given
freely.
Type: Romantic Comedy, with various Dramatic situations
Archive: Sure, as long as we know where it's taking up residence.
Rating: G to NC-17, depending on the chapter
Pairing: Haldir/? (All kinf Haf Haldir loving going on...or Haldir lusting,
depending on the case...and on occasion, some Haldir friendliness, if the loving
& lusting goes awry.)
Warning: We are silly elves. Our stories get silly sometimes. Deal,
or don't read them. ;)
Disclaimers: These aren't our characters, but boy, oh boy, do we ever wish they
were! Of course, then we'd likely never leave our talans, and just sit
around playing strip monopoly with a few of them all the time, drinking fey wine
and making bad orc jokes...so, it's probably a good thing we don't own
them.
Notes:
I did not plan to ever write and LOTR fan fiction, in fact, I meant not
to. But then this challenge was
posted, and then I shared the info about it with my sisters, and before I knew
it, we were driving down the highway plotting this story.
I apologize for any mistakes; much of this was written at 35 miles an
hour in a Corolla. Due to the fact
that we have neither the time nor the skill required to translate into Elvish
that which we wished to, pretend that everything you read <that looks like
this> is written in the beautiful language of the elves.
This isn’t entirely consistent with the book, nor does it jive
completely with the movie, or even the cartoons, for that matter.
We’re just taking what we like and throwing it in.
Beta Reader: Monty (Sorta, since she's more like an Omega Reader after we've
gone through it the number of times we have.)
Chapter One
Legolas learned back in his chair, a thoughtful look plaguing his features. Gimli contemplated it while chewing not so thoughtfully on a lamb’s leg. The King of Gondor let a grin playfully drift across his face before taking a long puff of his pipe. “Then, perhaps neither answer suits him.” Aragorn said, offering a third solution.
“You mean to say he doesn’t do anythin’?” Gimli asked, an eyebrow raised.
The elf smirked. “He means to say the Galadrim has no preference, my friend.”
“Pahhh!” Gimli lifted his mug, drank deeply, and set it down with a flourish. “You could see right well that the man, eh, the elf, was more than a wee bit more interested in those of the male persuasion. You cannot tell me you didn’t notice it.”
Aragorn gave the dwarsligslight nod, and then glanced over to Legolas. “You wish for my opinion?” the elf cocked his head, amused. Aragorn nodded again, grinning lips nearly dropping the pipe from his mouth. “It is my belief that Haldir of Lorien acts upon the same…interests as the rest of us.”
Removing the pipe, Aragorn chuckled. “It seems, my friends, you disagree upon this subject.”
The three were sitting around a table in the rear of a pub on the outskirts of Gondor. Now anain,ain, in order to get away from daily kingly life, Elessar would have his court informed that he was ill, and away he went, for a few days or so, normally accompanied by his two companions. Elessar would become Aragorn once again, and the three would spend the time on a hunt, or camping in discrete locations. Or, sitting around an old wooden bar table, discussing the sexual orientation of elves they knew. Good, old-fashioned male bonding, one might say.
“There is no disagreement.” Grunted Gimli, wiping the back of his sleeve along his moist beard. “The elf is clearly mistaken.”
“Most assuredly, master dwarf, I am not!” Legolas defended, a bit more aggressively than he’d planned.
“Don’t you get snippy with me, master elf!” Gimli snorted. “What makes you so sure that Haldir fellow isn’t interested in males?”
“What makes you so sure he is?” Legolas countered, adding, “Or do you have some knowledge we do not?”
“What is that supposed to…whoa, ho, ho! – take that back!” Gimli warned, reaching for his axe, as a smug elf darted out of range of the weapon and be the the silent ranger’s chair, placing Aragorn between the two.
“My good friends,” Aragorn began, a playful look dancing in his eyes, “might I offer to you a suggestion?”
When neither answered, Aragorn took the opportunity to continue speaking. “What if we were to make a wager amongst ourselves?”
“A wager?” repeated the dwarf, interested in the prospect of financial gain.
“A wager, yes, a friendly wager, of course.” Aragorn paused. “But, no, tis folly.” He returned to his pipe.
“” Legolas slowly returned to his seat, resting his elbows on the table and his head in his hands. “What is on your mind, Aragorn?”
The ranger again waited until he had grasped their full attention, then the smile crept back, and he could wait no longer. “If you both have such great convictions, there would be but one way to resolve such a dispute. One of you will have to prove the other wrong.”
Gimli hoisted his mug into the air. “An interesting challenge, Lord Aragorn. I am willing to accept such a contest, that is, if you aren’t troubled by the fact I shall best you, master elf.” Gimli’s smirking caused more of the ale to flow into his beard than into his mouth, but this seemed to concern him little as he set his mug down and awaited an answer.
“And when it is known that I am correct and you are not, master dwarf,” said Legolas, staring with disdain as the soggy looking elf, “I should like to see that infernal beard of yours shaved clean as my prize!” Legolas bit his lip, then, knowing he’d spoken more of his mind than intended.
“And I,” stated the dwarf, regarding Legolas, “would take for my prize not three golden strands from your head, but the entire braid!”
Aragorn frowned, and was about to make an attempt to stop the competition before it began, but once Gimli and Legolas had firmly shaken hands, he leisurely slumped back into his seat. Gimli was drunk, Legolas seemed to be – perhaps by morning both would forget such a transaction had occurred. If not, there was little possibility that such a point could be proven. So many of the elves had already traveled across the sea, he doubted Haldir was still even in Arda. Aragorn took a long drag on the pipe, closed his eyes, and hoped beyond all hope he hadn’t become involved in another war.