Tyre
folder
Lord of the Rings Movies › General › Lord of the Ring Stars
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
1,626
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Lord of the Rings Movies › General › Lord of the Ring Stars
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
1,626
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
This is work of fiction! I do not know the celebrity(ies) I am writing about, and I do not profit from these writings.
Tyre
Not true. Full-stop.
Tyre
By Sonja. limey_sugar@yahoo.co.uk
Orlando Bloom/Elijah Wood
R
________
"Aww, fuck!" Orlando beat his fist against the steering wheel of the Jeep before easing over to the hard shoulder. In the middle of nowhere. "Help me change the tyre?"
"*You* know how to change a tyre?"
"Shut the fuck up Lij. And no, I don't. Thatâwhy why I need your help."
"How can you not know? That's basic car maintenance, man!" Elijah was near-hysterical with laughter. "You sure you're not a girl?"
"Look, if you don't want to help, at least get out of the damn Jeep."
"No, no. I'll help. It's just funny. A guy who can't change a tyre." Elijah jumped out wal walked around to the back to where Orli was now standing, staring at the offending tyre. "Where's the jack?"
"Huh? Oh. Oh shit! I lent it to Dom. He must not have put it back. Now what?"
Elijah rolled his eyes and sighed. "You *do* have your phone, don't you?"
"Yeah, of course I've got it. Not an idiot, you know." Orlando half-smirked and added, "Though the evidence seems rather to the contrary."
_____
After having rung Viggo and begging for rescue, Orlando joined Elijah back in the Jeep. He'd somehow managed to forget his cigarettes and was considering asking Elijah for one of his Cloves. Ahh, the Cloves. It had gotten so just the scent of one could make Orlando hard in two seconds flat. The scent of Cloves in the air meant Elijah was somewhere about, and the thought of Elijah being somewhere about turned Orlando into the randiest bastard this side of the equator.
Today was the day he was going to tell Elijah exactly that. That's why he'd suggested they go for a drive- to explore New Zealand a bit and get to know one another better. They were going to be here for more than a year, so they should (he'd told Elijah). Orlando's idea of getting to know Elijah better involved getting on his hands and knees and letting the boy fuck him into oblivion. Now to let Elijah in on it, and what better time than now? It would be at least an hour before o goo got here. Time enough for a quickie. Or to be shot down.
"Lij," Orlando began, but couldn't finish. He inwardly cursed his cowardice and bent forward to lean his head on the wheel.
"What?"
"Yowanafuhme?"
"Orli, did you just, ehm, ask me if I wanted to fuck you?"
"Yep. So, you want to?" Out with it. "I mean, I want you to, so you know, would you?"
"Out here? Unless you keep lube in your glove box, I don't think that would be a very good idea."
Orlando blinked. "I've got-"
"Oh my God! You *do*! Can't remember your jack, but you've got lube. Jesus."
"Funny, innit? Cos I planned this, but I didn't plan the flat tyre."
"Oh." Elijah wasn't quite sure what to think. Other than "˜hell yes,' that is. "Okay."
~END. I think. Hell, I dunno.
Tyre
By Sonja. limey_sugar@yahoo.co.uk
Orlando Bloom/Elijah Wood
R
________
"Aww, fuck!" Orlando beat his fist against the steering wheel of the Jeep before easing over to the hard shoulder. In the middle of nowhere. "Help me change the tyre?"
"*You* know how to change a tyre?"
"Shut the fuck up Lij. And no, I don't. Thatâwhy why I need your help."
"How can you not know? That's basic car maintenance, man!" Elijah was near-hysterical with laughter. "You sure you're not a girl?"
"Look, if you don't want to help, at least get out of the damn Jeep."
"No, no. I'll help. It's just funny. A guy who can't change a tyre." Elijah jumped out wal walked around to the back to where Orli was now standing, staring at the offending tyre. "Where's the jack?"
"Huh? Oh. Oh shit! I lent it to Dom. He must not have put it back. Now what?"
Elijah rolled his eyes and sighed. "You *do* have your phone, don't you?"
"Yeah, of course I've got it. Not an idiot, you know." Orlando half-smirked and added, "Though the evidence seems rather to the contrary."
_____
After having rung Viggo and begging for rescue, Orlando joined Elijah back in the Jeep. He'd somehow managed to forget his cigarettes and was considering asking Elijah for one of his Cloves. Ahh, the Cloves. It had gotten so just the scent of one could make Orlando hard in two seconds flat. The scent of Cloves in the air meant Elijah was somewhere about, and the thought of Elijah being somewhere about turned Orlando into the randiest bastard this side of the equator.
Today was the day he was going to tell Elijah exactly that. That's why he'd suggested they go for a drive- to explore New Zealand a bit and get to know one another better. They were going to be here for more than a year, so they should (he'd told Elijah). Orlando's idea of getting to know Elijah better involved getting on his hands and knees and letting the boy fuck him into oblivion. Now to let Elijah in on it, and what better time than now? It would be at least an hour before o goo got here. Time enough for a quickie. Or to be shot down.
"Lij," Orlando began, but couldn't finish. He inwardly cursed his cowardice and bent forward to lean his head on the wheel.
"What?"
"Yowanafuhme?"
"Orli, did you just, ehm, ask me if I wanted to fuck you?"
"Yep. So, you want to?" Out with it. "I mean, I want you to, so you know, would you?"
"Out here? Unless you keep lube in your glove box, I don't think that would be a very good idea."
Orlando blinked. "I've got-"
"Oh my God! You *do*! Can't remember your jack, but you've got lube. Jesus."
"Funny, innit? Cos I planned this, but I didn't plan the flat tyre."
"Oh." Elijah wasn't quite sure what to think. Other than "˜hell yes,' that is. "Okay."
~END. I think. Hell, I dunno.