The Prince of Lothlorien

Title: The Prince of Lothlorien
Author: Anu (anubeta@lycos.com)
Pairing: Celebrian/Thranduil, Celebrian/Elrond.
Rating: R
Type: Slash Romance
Warning: NOT HET!
Summary: Celebrian grows up. Elrond falls in love.

A/N: MALE Celebrian fic. Prequel to Undomiel. Celebrian pronounced kell-uh-brigh-in, not kelli-bree-ann.

/Elrond,

I write to invite you, dear friend of mine and fellow ring-bearer; to come and visit my husband and I in Lothlorien. We have a proposal for you that will bring unity, harmony, peace and prosperity for our homelands.

Celeborn and I have a son we would like to formally offer you in marrige. Celebrian is of age, healthy and strong of mind and body, and above all - fertile. He is untouched, as great steps have been taken to assure this, among them the appointing of three full-time bodygaurds.

A marrige between he and you would not only be benficial politically, but aesthetically and monetarily as well. The both of you; meaning Celebrian and yourself, need heirs and mates, and you can provide that for one another.

Thus, I extend to you my husband's invitation to come and stay with us in Lothlorien.
I feel I must warn you, Celebrian will not be an easy capture. He has his mother's spirit, I fear, and his father's strength of heart, I regret.

With love,
Galadriel/

Elrond re-read the letter, then put it down on his desk and laughed.

Erestor appeared from between the bookshelves, one brow raised. "And you are laughing because...?" he prodded. Elrond waved the letter at him in disbelief. "Galadriel and Celeborn want me to marry thier son!"

Erestor took the letter and read it through swiftly.
"Have you ever met him?"
"Who?"
"Celebrian."
"No."
"Perhaps you should."
"And let Galadriel think I've accepted?!"
"If you must. As your advisor, my lord, I think you should at least meet him. I think it would be good for you."
"Good for me?" Elrond sputtered.

Erestor nodded.
"Erestor, are you mad? I can't marry at this time...I've...I've...I've got obligations!"
"Like what?"
"Imladris is still under construction."
"It's finished, Elrond, has been a thousand years."

Elrond began to sputter for more excuses, scraping to get off the hook. Erestor cut him off. "I'm leaving Glorfindel in charge here and taking you to Lothlorien. You need to get out, anyway."

*****

"It's almost dark. Is it much further?" Rumil whimpered to Haldir, shifting on the horse in front of him. He wished they'd brought four horses instead of only two.

Celebrian, the fearless leader of the four, answered him from his place in front of Orophin on the second horse. "Nearly. We'll smell it before we see it. Men don't pride themselves on cleanliness or public health." Orophin snorted at the understatement.

This wasn't the first time Rumil, long past majority but vastly underpriveldged and nearly as overprotected as Celebrian, had been allowed to sneak off with his older brothers and thier royal charge. It *was* the first time they'd taken him to the town of Men where Arathorn, Celebrian's disreputable friend, lived.

Usuallen Oen Orophin, Haldir and Celebrian returned from visiting Arathorn, they would be either drunk or hung over, usually filthy, and always rowdy. Rumil was looking forward to seeing Arathorn.

He'd met the Man or or twice before, but...whew, what was that *smell*? Rumil sat straighter, sniffed again, then covered his nose with a grimace. He looked to Celebrian. "They dump thier refuse in the streets. You get used to the stench, after a while." Celebrian explained. Rumil nodded, trying not to throw up.

It wasn't long before they came upon the town. It was small, the lighted tavern it's main attraction. That was where they were headed, Celebrian leading his mount through the dirty village. Haldir steehis his own mount after Celebrian's lead. Although he and Orophin were older than Celebrian, they did not hinder him in where he wanted to go; only doing thier duty as gaurds: following and protecting thier charge. Rumil, although younger than Celebrian, also had the duty to protect and preserve Celebrian.

Celebrian had good sense, and was wise, so the only need he had of his baurdaurds was the occasional protection of his virtue, or the muscle in domination tactics. Beyond that, the three brothers were friends, companions, and the siblings he had never had.

Stopping in front of the tavern, Celebrian and Orophin dismounted. Haldir and Rumil followed suit, keeping close to Celebrian. They hadn't been his personal gaurds for nearly two and a half thousand years for nothing. The Prince of Lorien was a wild man, especially when egged on by the twenty-year old Isildur's Heir.

"Kell!" Arathorn bounced out of the opened tavern door and wrapped his grimy arms around Celebrian, lifting the elf off the ground. Celebrian hugged him back and growled like a bear. Arathorn roared at him and they broke free, laughing. Arathorn turned to look at Haldir. "My god Kell, you *still* haven't been able to ditch these three?" He always pretended to hate Haldir, and Haldir always pretended to find him scum under his boot. "I "I rather like them following me about." Celebrian answered, handing the stableboy the reins to the horses.
"Hah! I wouldn't. They stink of soap. Must scare off the wildlife for miles, and attract orcs like flies to honey."
"The orcs only avoid *you* because you smell so bad that eating you might give them indigestion." Orophin parried.
"No, they avoid us because everywhere pretty Rumil goes, screaming girls follow." Haldir teased his little brother.
"They only scream after they see Orophin's face." Rumil said evenly, following Celebrian inside the tavern, ducking under Arathorn's admittedly rank arm.

Orophin kicked him in the rear playfully and he fell to the floor. Rumil got up and wiped mud off himself, glaring at his brother. "Have *you* ever got it coming, brother." he muttered. Orophin only laughed.

They took chairs around a beaten old table scarred with knife cuts and scattered with a deck of cards. Arathorn cleared the mess off with his arm, and Haldir scrunched his nose before sitting. "Whatever happened to elven grace?" Arathorn asked. "You're not even drunk yet, lad." Rumil shrugged, surly.

"Come now, don't be that way." Celebrian said, leaning across the nasty table to lay a hand on Rumil's shoulder. "Buck up, and have a good time. Orophin always gets a little rough in antipation of what might happen when I get into my cups, is all."
"You *came* to get drunk?" Rumil asked in wonder. Celebrian lived a fairly tame life around him.

"No. I *came* to see Arathorn, and to get away from Mother's magic forest. There are eyes in the trees there."
"Yes, they watch you when you go for a leak." Arathorn added, and all five erupted into laughter. When it had died down, Celebrian lightly slapped Arathorn's arm. "You're sick, you know that?" Arathorn nodded agreement, and captured a bar wench on her way past thier table to gawk at the elves.

"Five ales, if you will, m'lady?"
"Certainly sir, but wouldn't thees pes prefer wine?"
"Not the wine you'vt! Wt! We came for the beer!" Orophin crowed, to cheers from the scattered human residents of the tavern.
The barmaid blushed prettily and scurried off for a few tankards.

When she returned, Arathorn had dealt out cards and was trying to teach Rumil how to play. He gave up after a while and had a go at his mug. Haldir, Celebrian and Orophin persevered and taught Rumil the meaning of the poorly drawn nude human figureines on the cards, how to play the game, and how to do it well. When he won a round, another round of drinks pushed Celebrian's half-empty mug closer to him on the table.

He had a swallow, not liking the bitter taste. When he set the mug down, he noted that Celebrian was watching him. "It grows on you." He said. "Don't drink too much of it, it's a lot different from wine." They had all been raised on wine and water, and as adults drank one or the other. Rumil had developed a head for wine, but Celebrian knew to watch him with a mug of beer. It affected elves differently than Men, and Rumil was likely to be falling down drunk very swiftly, if not cautioned.

Rumil stayed out of the cup for the most part, but was fairly sure that his brothers were riding the edge of drunkeness, and even Celebrian was barely holding his wits.

When Arathorn lost, he stood and dumped his cards on the table. "I'm out." He announced, and began to shuffle off. Celebrian smirked, standing. "No you're not Arathorn. You won. You just can't hold a decent bluff." He laid his hand down on the table. Indeed, Arathorn had bested him. He waved at Celebrian dismissively. "Go to bed, Elf."
"Kiss my ass, Man."

Much to Rumil's surprise, and to Orophin's delight and horror as he sat in his chair and laughed, while Haldir blinked at the sight like a sleepy owl, Arathorn did. He dropped to his knees behind Celebrian and kissed one of his buttocks through his leggings, then whisked down the waistband of them, exposing Celeb's 's creamy, shapely rear, and kissed him again. Celebrian tiredly attempted to slap the Man. "Some bodygaurds you are." He slurred at Haldir, who had fallen asleep and Orophin, who only giggled more girlishly.

Arathorn still had a hold of Celebrian's rear, and since the Man was on his knees, Celebrian only had to walk off to get his distance. "Piss off Arathorn." He stubbed his toe on a chair leg and swore. Maybe walking off wasn't such a hot idea. He sat on Orophin's lap and pulled the giggling elf's cloak over them. "'M sick. Take me to my bed." he demanded in a very snottish-prince way. Orophin valiantly attempted to, but fell over.

With Haldir's and the now-intoxicated Rumil's assistance, the five of them made it to the stable where Arathorn paid rent to sleep in an empty horse stall. The four-Elf, one Man pile slept well that night, mumbling, kicking, stealing covers, scratching at Arathorn's now-shared fleas, and complaining about 'that elbereth-awful smell', which proved to be the damp human at the bottom of the pile, stinking like dirty laundry.

*****

Elrond arrived at the borders of Caras Galadon in the early afternoon, and was led by the border gaurds to his reserved talan, and told that he would be sent for when the Lady was prepared to see him.

It was early evening before he wass sent for, and when he and Erestor arrived in the Lady's company, her brows were drawn and lips tight - the only sign that she was fuming.

"Ah, Elrond. It was so good of you to come. I trust that you would like to meet my son before you make any desicsions?"
"But of course, Lady. As is only wise."
"Then I will present him before you tomorrow."
"Galadriel, I think I would prefer a candid meeting with your son, actually."
"Well, I would drag him out here if I could, but I'm afraid he's...missing."

"Missing?" Elrond enquired.
"He's run off again, to valar-knows-where. My son is a wonderful warrior and a wise man, but he keeps rather disreputable company."
"Disreputable?"
"Men. Namely one, Isildur's current hier."
"Oh."
"Yes. Pardon me, but I must see that he reappears convieniently tomorrow." With a smile that betrayed her anger, Galadriel bowed and left gracefully.

Elrond turned and looked at Erestor.
"Don't you say a word. Celebrian sounds like a charming elf." Erestor warned.
"I wasn't. And charming isn't the word."
"What is?" There was warning in Erestor's tone.
"Fascinating."
Erestor smirked.

"He is, at that." Celeborn's sudden appearence made both noldor whirl. "And he annoys his mother to no end. I think it only bothers her so because she sees so much of herself in him."
"I hardly think Galadriel was the type to run off instead of meeting her betrothed-to-be." Elrond replied.
"How do you know?" Celeborn grinned.

Elrond found himself at a loss for words. He was *not* marrying another Galadriel all over again.
However unluckily, Celeborn understood his thought pattern.

"He's not like his mother." Celeborn assured.
Elrond wasn't sure if he should belive him or dare hope to not belive him.
Either way, he suddenly dreaded meeting Celebrian tomorrow.

*****

Celebrian woke to an unearthly smell, and the sound of snoring. The odd thing was, it was dark, but he knew it was daytime. And there was something in his mouth. Brows furrowed, and reality hit. With it, he tried not to scream.

Celebrian calmly spit out the lock of Arathorn's hair, and tried not to spit excessively *on* Arathorn. He carefully climbed *off* the grimy human. Even when you were used to him, Arathorn at close range *really stunk*. Haldir and Orophin were easy enough to clamber past to escape the straw nest of stench Arathorn had been cultivating, but Rumil had a habit of clinging in his sleep, and was currently wrapped around Celebrian's thigh. He kicked him off as gently as he could.

He walked outside the stall. There had to be a bucket of water *somewhere*.

"Hey girl." A voice and smell assailed him. Not another rank Man. His mouth needed washing out. He didn't have *time* to beat the crap out of this guy before he threw up. He turned to face an unshaven, burly, ugly Man. He opened his cloak and pulled his shirt taught against his chest. "Look. No breasts. Sod off." He said shortly to the Man, and turned away, continuing his search for something to wash out the taste of Arathorn's hair.

The Man went away, grumbling. Celebrian settled for the horse trough. Drinking after a horse was safer than Arathorn's hair, after all. At least the places the horse's mouth had been were predictable.

*****

Celebrian did not return home. The patrols sent to find him returned empty-handed. Celeborn hid in his rooms to escape the wrath of Galadriel, and to smother his giggle fits whenever Elrond looked pointedly at Erestor, meaning 'I told you so'.

Galadriel fumed, stalked, and muttered enough that Elrond and Erestor kept to themselves.

In the afternoon, a breathless rider brought word that Elrond's party had been seen leaving the Bruinen, and Glorfindel feared the sudden bravery of orcs tramping about the borders as a sign of a larger, more dangerous plot.

With many polite apologies, Elrond excused himself to return there and see to business himself, leaving Erestor there to wait for Celebrian's return and to console Galadriel, if he could, not that he would dare get in the agry elda's way.

*****

Celebrian, Rumil, Orophin and Haldir stumbled home.

They were broke, flea-infested, hung-over, filthy, and exhausted. All in all, it had been a great time.

On the border of Caras Galadon, they stopped for a bath and meal, and got some news. Galadriel wanted to see Celebrian, and she was very angry that he'd disappeared again. After a nap, Celebrian and his three bodygaurds cleaned up sufficiently that they were presentable, and allowed the gaurds to 'catch them sneaking home'.

Brought before his mother, Celebrian stood before her a long time.
She glared. He waited. His gaurds behind him were motionless. Haldir sucessfully smothered a case of the hiccups.

After a while, Celebrian's patience ran out. "Did you want to see me, Mother?"
"Yes."
"Why?"

Another look look into his eyes later, she spoke. "Your suitor Thranduil is not the right one for you."
"And you know this how?"
"I have seen it."
"In your mirror?" Celebrian had no awe for his mother's abilities, but plenty respect.
"Of course."
"What have you seen?"
"I saw you dead in his arms."

Haldir, Orophin and Rumil behind him tensed. Thier lives were devoted to keeping Celebrian safe. Galadriel spoke of thier failure. It was understandable that such speech should unsettle them.

Celebrian did not react vis.
.
"And so what do you take that to mean?"
"That you must not marry him."
"Who, then, *will* I marry?"
"Lord Elrond Peredhil of Imladris."

Celebrian went silent in disbelief, his handsome face stony. "Do I not have a choice?"
"I am afraid that in this, you do not, my son."

Celebrian spun on his heel and walked out. Haldir, Orophin and Rumil followed. Galadriel remained on the porch where she was, but shook her head at her son's stubborness.

*****

"So you see Elrond, I grew concerned, and called you."
"It was good that you did."

Elrond and Glorfindel were poring over a map that Glorfindel had marked with numbers and dates. It was the map they had charted the movements of orcs in and around the Bruinen Valley, and the last two day's tracks were indeed larger and closer spaced than before.

"So you have no guesses or ideas of how to handle this?" Glorfindel asked.
"No, not really. I'm glad you brought it to my attention, but I don't see where it's any sort of danger or risk. Keep watching them, and call me if anything worse happens before I return. I *was* away on personal business, you know."
"Yes, finding a bride. I know. Everyone knows. We can't wait to meet her."
"Not bride, groom. And not her, him. Galadriel and Celeborn expressly said son, and refer to Celebrian as a son."
"How do you know? You said he wasn't there when you went."
"Because he ran off. And I'll have you know, it's not a feminine trait to bear children among the sindar, particularly the mixed elves of Lothlorien."

Glorfindel made a face. "As long as he's not *girly*, I think we'll be fine. I don't want you to have a prissy mate, Elrond."
"Why is that?"
"You're selfish, Elrond. You need somebody as butch as you are, or they won't get enough attention from you."
"I'm selfish?"
"Yes, you are. But we all still love you anyway."
"Gil-Galad..."
"Was every bit as selfish as you are. I hoplebrlebrian is as butch as he appears to be, I really do."
"Butch. Isn't that a word from the launguage of Men?"
Glorfindel had the grace to blush. "It fits."
"Yeah well, from what I've seen, it suits, also."

Glorfindel smiled.
"I don't know if it was such a good idea to leave Erestor there alone, though. He was terribly eager to go."
Glorfindel's smile froze. "You left him there alone?"
"Yes. Is that a problem?"
"You had better get back there quickly Elrond, before Haldir kills him for messing with his brother."
"Erestor is with Orophin?"
"Was. He was also with Haldir, but the chase for him was ended by an unseen party, so Erestor settled for the younger brother. He's after the youngest now, Rumil."
"Oh Elbereth."
"Indeed."
"Shall I saddle your horse?"
"Would you?"

*****

It was late, nearing midnight, when Celebrian dared stir.

Rumil was curled tightly around Haldir tonight, because Celebrian had kicked him off to be sure that he wouldn't have to untangle himself from him to slip out later. Orophin was sound asleep, snoring softly, facing outward with his back to the inside of the nest. Haldir was in mirror position on the other side. Celebrian and Rumil had always slept in the middle, being the youngest and the protected ones.

Celebrian had gotten so used to them sleeping like this that it was hard to fall asleep if they weren't there. They had protected him ever since the days of the Last Allianc
He
He had accompanied his father to the battle, but was kept far back of the front lines, seeing as how he had only been thirty-seven at the time, thirteen years from majority. He had served as counsellor to his father in the Counsels, safe in his father's shadow from the hairy hulking forms of Men, the armored bulk of soldiers, and the roving eyes of King Gil-Galad.

Celebrian still had nightmares about the time he had woken up, rolled tightly in his blankets, and found himself in Gil-Galad's tent, with the High King looking into his eyes. He remember how Gil-Galad had prized him for fertility, for youth, for beauty. With his arms rolled tightly in his blankets he hadn't been able to fight as Gil-Galad stroked the planes of his youthful face, held the squirming bundle in his arms, and told him about his herald and lover Elrond, son of Earendil.

Gil-Galad had wanted to wed him, to make him bear both Elrond's children and his own. Celebrian was a frightened child then, so frightened he thought that if he closed his eyes and didn't respond, Gil-Galad would hopefully tire of him and go away. Gil-Galad eventually had, but not before stealing away Celebrian's first kiss in an innocent brush of lips.

King Gil-Galad had returned the elfling, virtue untainted, to his bed in his father's tent, and left the camp.

When Celeborn had come home and found himself pinned at the point of his own sword by his shaking and frightened underage son, he had been furious, and demanded to know who had dared touch him. Celebrian told him who did it, and what he'd done, every last detail. But that didn't mean Celeborn could undo it, or gain retribution. Gil-Galad was the King. The only thing Celeborn could do, he did. He prevented it from ever happening again.

Celebrian had met Haldir and Orophin and Rumil then. Haldir was just past majority, Orophin two years from it, and Rumil just old enough to have snuck into an oxcart of weaponry and stowed away after his brothers, thereby excluding all three from active battle duty. After that, Celebrian was safe. And he had brothers.

Gil-Galad had asked Celeborn for Celebrian. Civilly, Celeborn had refused. Thranduil was there then, but he had maintained a respectful distance of Celeborn and Galadriel's only son. Celebrian remained safe. Elrond likely never knew. Gil-Galad fell in battle shortly after, and with the war over, all had returned to thier homes. Except Elrond. The King's herald had been so distraught, he tried to bring the King back, and brought back Glorfindel of Gondolin instead. They were already home then, or Celeborn would have helped the elf reorient to life again while Elrond, exhausted and emotionally spent, lay semi-comatose.

But it hadn't been too bad of a time, all in all. For the most part, Gil-Galad had been too busy to chase after Celeborn's boy. But when he found time away from his herald/lover, it was Celebrian he sought out. And now Mother wanted him to marry Gil-Galad's former lover? He had a few protests. Forefront of them was that he loved Thranduil, who had courted him long and patiently.

And so it was to Thranduil Celebrian went.

In younger days, Thranduil had been forced to rule from his throne and castle. Now times were easy, and Celebrian knew that Thranduil would be on the ers ers with his gaurds. In times of peace, it was more exciting than sitting at home and counting chickens. But only marginally so.

Celebrian crept over the sleeping lump that was Orophin on fingers and toes, and dressed silently in the dark. Then he made sure all three were sleeping, before climbing stealthily down the ladder.

He untied his horse, led her halfway out of Mother's forest, and mounted. He walked her past the borders, and kept walking silently for a while, spurring her only when far enough away there was no chance of detection.

After that, he was fairly safe. He knew all the paths by memory, but he hadn't been to Mirkwood in a long time, and darkness always meant increased danger. What if Mother's premonition was right? Would he end this night dead in Thranduil's arms? Oddly enough, when he thought of it, he wasn't afraid. Was there ever a time when had been afraid to die? Celebrian couldn't remember any, but he didn't have that great of a memory anyway. Nearly two thousand seventy years was a long time to remember everything.

He felt nothing when he saw the small signal fire of a gaurd station. No relief, no worry, no fear. He wondered why. Soon Mirkwood elves were upon him, and when they recognized him they greeted him by name, and refused to let him dismount, instead taking the reins and leading him to the gaurd station where Thranduil was. Celebrian sighed in resignment and allowed it.

When he arrived, Thranduil had evidently just been woken up. His hair was a mess, hanging long and loose to his thighs, barefoot and wearing only some dirty, hastily pulled-on leggings. By the Valar, he was beautiful. Celebrian dismounted, and with a wave of his hand, Thranduil dismissed the clustered elves. "Why are you here?" he wondered aloud.
"I need to talk with you."
"Talk." Thranduil had always been very careful about appearences.
"Privately."
That earned him a glare, but Thranduil motioned him to the ladder to the treetop talan.

Celebrian climbed up, aware that Thranduil was keeping his distance to avoid breathing on Celebrian's buttocks as he climbed up behind him. As if Thranduil expected him to be disgusted by a simple display of inaverdent desire. Celebrian was sick of modest appearences. He brighted the lamp, and woke two sleeping elves. "Clear out." He demanded shortly.

Thranduil looked at him oddly, but said nothing. The elves left. Celebrian turned to Thranduil and dropped gracefully to sit on the bed Thranduil had recently been sleeping in. Thranduil sat on the end of it, a proper distance from Celebrian.
"What did you have to say?"

Celebrian took a deep breath. "Mother had a premonition. That I would lay dead in your arms if we were to marry."
If Thranduil had any reaction to this, he didn't show it. Celebrian went on.

"She's arranged for me to marry someone else. I have no say in it. I don't want to marry him."
"Well, it's not Gil-Galad." Thranduil commented. Celebrian had told him all about that. "Who then, is it?"
Celebrian closed his eyes, lashes fanning against his cheekbones. "Elrond." he whispered.

Thranduil rose, and went to stand at the doorway, his back to Celebrian. When he spoke, his voice held no emotion at all. "Why did you come here?"

Celebrian did kno know. "I love you." He said.

Thranduil turned on him. "Don't lie to me!"

Celebrian cowered a little under Thranduil's weighty glare. "I'm not lying." he said, straightening his shoulders.

Celebrian promptly found himself flathis his back under Thranduil's body. If the position was meant to arrest him to his senses by humiliation, it failed. Thranduil felt so *good* on top of him. Celebrian moaned without meaning to. Thranduil slapped him. "Stupid, stupid, foolish boy!" Now Celebrian's moan was of pain, tinged with anger.
"Have two thousand years taught you nothing? Have you been so overprotected that you really are this stupid?"

"Why are you angry with me?" Celebrian asked.
"Because I *know* you're smarter than this!"
"Than what? What have I done that's so unforgivably stupid?"
Thranduil growled in frustration, and kissed him.

Kissing wasn't the right word for what Thranduil did to him. It was nothing like the sweet, innocent, chaste kisses shared perviously. It was rape, if rape can be done to one's mouth. Thranduil's tounge thrust and beat against his in cruel parody of something unknown entirely to the virginal prince. He tickled the roof of Celebrian's mouth so mercilessly that Celebrian couldn't even rub away the tickle with his tounge, because it was knocked aside when Thranduil's pressed for his throat, laying his tounge flat, going over it, sliding back along his palate until Celebrian thought he would gag. It was as if Thranduil was trying to crawl down inside him, into his chest and eat his heart whole. He whimpered, couldn't breathe. There was no mercy. Thranduil continued his assault. Had he been this uncaring, this unfeeling the whole time? How could Celebrian have been decieved...Thanduil was trying to kill him. Was going to kill him. Suddenly, Celebrian was very afraid he would die.

He began screaming. He couldn't get any air in his lungs, and Thranduil gave him none. Celebrian fought, screaming on pure will, for he'd lost the physical ability to do it. Suddenly Thranduil pulled away and Celebrian's scream emerged into the hot night air, naked and seen for the helpless shriek it was. Celebrian thrashed against his lover. "Yes, that's it, you stupid boy, fight me." Thranduil encouraged, and Celebrian stilled, bringing his silver eyes up to his captor's violet ones. What he saw there made his head reel. Thranduil wanted him to fight him as if for his very life. He wanted loyalty from Celebrian, no, *demanded* loyalty, but for *Elrond*!

"No." Celebrian whispered.
Thranduil's eyes flashed anger, and wordlessly he bit Celebrian. On the thick tendon between neck and shoulder, he bit Celebrian. Again, there was no mercy. Celebrian did not plead, did not fight. Blood flowed. It really began to hurt. Tears came to both thier eyes. Celebrian couldn't believe Thranduil was hurting him. Thranduil wished he didn't have to. There were no screams this time. Only when Celebrian thrashed and Thranduil feared that he would hurt Celebrian terribly did he stop.

"Why? why?" Celebrian sobbed.
Thranduil held his face tenderly between his hands, lips and chin covered in his beloved's bood. "You trust too easily!" he hissed.
"Why shouldn't I trust you? You've never hurt me before."
"That doesn't mean I *can't* or that I *won't*. Celebrian, you don't protect yourself, child!"
"I am a warrior!"
"No you're not! Haldir and Orophin and little Rumil are warriors. You've never had to protect yourself before."
"I have."
"When you needed to, you couldn't, and therefore you haven't had to since. Brat! You are spoiled! You're more child than man!"
"I've never had to *be* a man."
"It's time to be one now Celebrian."
"Tell me how."
"Do your duty. Marry Elrond."
"No!" Now he fought. "I love *you*, Thranduil!"

Thranduil shook him to stillness. "You child! You don't know love!"
"Do you? Do you love me?"
"Stop trying to manipulate me, Celebrian. This is about *you*."
"What about me, then?"
"You are stupid. Childish, Inconsiderate. Immature. Foolish. Would you like me to go on?"
"No. Explain those to me. I don't understand yet."
"And you want so badly to understand."
"*Don't mock me!*"

"You are stupid because you don't know you can't protect yourself, and yet you went away from the only saftey and surety you had, and came to my arms. Childish, because you think you love me, but don't even know what that means. Inconsiderate, because you have a duty to your people as thier Prince, and you are shirking it for your own pleasure which causes *no one* gain!" Thranduil took a breath, and stroked the hair off Celebrian's temples. "Immature, because you do *not* know what I am capabl, an, and what you think you are getting yourself into. Foolish, because you came here to ask me to take you, thinking that Elrond won't want damamged goods. What if he doesn't mind, Celebrian? What if he didn't mind?"

The world was thrown into stark relief of black and white. No one had dared speak so to Celebrian before, and he had never heard these words, or heard them as they were meant to be said. "So I'm pitiful, and useless, as bad as a simpering maiden knitting doilies!" He cried out to Thranduil, his enemy.

"No, you are not Celebrian. Because despite all that, you are kind, and generous, and loving, and caring, and selfless."
Thranduil got off him and pulled him sitting. "You are kind, because you are innocent."
He removed Celebrian's boots, and Celebrian was powerless to stop him. "You are generous, because you are honest."
Thranduil removed Celebrian's bloodied shirt tenderly. "You are loving, because you are loved."
He lay celebrian back. "You are selfless, because while all this has been about you, you have not given thought to yourself. Celebrian, the impeccable virginal pride of Lothlorien, these things make you both beautiful and ugly, but only you get decide which you are more of."

celebrian lay naked before Thranduil now, and was not ashamed, because this man had seen deeper than his flesh, and that was such a little thing by comparision. "What am I in your eyes?" He sobbed.
Thranduil leaned over him and wiped away his tears with long slender thumbs, and kissed his brow gently. "Beautiful."
Celebrian shivered, and not from cold.

"When you came here, you wanted me to take you." Thranduil said, standing and stripping away his leggings until he stood as naked as Celebrian.
"Do you still?" Celebrian swallowed, hardening at the sight of all the masculine beauty before him. Before he spoke, Thranduil said softly "Think not out of your lust, Celebrian." And that swept what he was going to say away entirely.

"Yes." He said at last.

Thranduil knelt on the bed and crawled, cat-like, up his thighs, stroking Celebrian's hardened member. "Stupid boy." He said, and then his mouth covered Celebrian. Wordless, gasping, Celebrian clawed at the bedding and tried to *think*, dammit. "No." he choked out. He licked his lips, and tried again, eyes threatening to roll back in his head. "Nohe mhe managed, louder. "NO!" he screamed, at last. Thranduil stopped his torment, but Celebrian's body insisted for the continuation of things. He fought it down. Oh, but he wanted it so badly. It was wrong. But oh how he *needed*!

He whimpered in the maelstrom. "Very good." Thranduil said.

Celebrian began to cry. Thranduil looked at him a long moment. "Turn over." He said blandly. This also, was an important point, a choice in the reforging of Celebrian's heart. Thranduil was *not* helping him. He was the enemy right now. Celebrian knew better than to do what Thranduil wanted him to, who knew what he might do? Yet he hesitated to disobey. In the end, he turned over.

"Immature. Foolish." Thranduil whispered, and Celebrian felt fear. Then Thranduil was between his legs, long hair sweeping his thighs, and that felt good, but Thranduil's wicked tounge, oh Elbereth. Celebrian screamed into the pillow, but it went unheeded. His legs spread themselves of thier own accord, and he wept. Thranduil's tounge teased him, sliding along his carefully preserved virginal opening, and Celebrian felt a moment of icy horror. His parents would be so angry if all thier work to preserve him was undone. Then Thranduil's tounge slid into him and he screamed and nearly came.

Thranduil's tounge pulled away, and he whispered into Celebrian's cleft, air dusting the slickened entrance. "I could take you like this. Hard, and brutally. It would hurt you, but I'd feel nothing but pleasure. All because you were so stupid as to come here alone, to be alone with me. You thought you were safe with me. I'm not so safe Celebrian. No one is. Stop trusting so easily. Make people earn it. I haven't earned this." His touge lapped Celebrian at that point, but he continued talking, and Celebrian kept listening.

"Your parents would be so angry. They might kill me, you know. You might be smart enough to hate me. Elrond might still want this. He might take you anyway, just the same way; hard, brutal, selfish."
"I hate you." Celebrian whispered through his tears.
"Good, child, because I hate you." Celebrian didn't know why that hurt, but it did. "After tonight, we can never love one another again. You'll love Elrond with all your heart, and you'll be my enemy, because I must hate him, you see. There will never be another like you Celebrian, and I can't forgive him of that theft."

The wetness on his buttocks was Thranduil's tears. "I'll never love another so whole-heartedly, or the same way ever in my life, Celebrian." Celebrian wept into his pillow. Thranduil was hurting his heart, while he felt nothing but pleasure in his body.

Thranduil gently turned him over, and Celebrian wept because he was crying and because he couldn't hide his face.

"Your first could be with the rough, harsh, thoughtless suitor you thought you knew." Thranduil said, and then gently, oh ever so carefully and tenderly and slowly brought Celebrian to completion with his mouth and swallowed every drop, savoring the taste he would never have but this once. Celebrian cried and shook with the aftershocks of it. Thranduil whispered "Or it could be good like that, beautiful like that, every single time, with the man who loves you, who married you, who you don't hate, who you don't have to hate."

Thranduil sat up on his knees and settled back against his heels. He brought himself off quickly, efficiently, careful to keep Celebrian as pure and untouched as ever. When he had done, he looked atebriebrian to find his eyes on him. "Am I a man now?" Celebrian asked.
"No." Thranduil said, and before Celebrian could ask or protest or fight, put his hand between Celebrian's legs and forced two fingers into him, dry and fast.

Celebrian fought back the scream, then. Thranduil answered the unspoken question in those guiless eyes. "Men don't hate without a reason. I hurt you. Remember how this hurts, right now, forever. Remember how it burns and stings, how badly you want to scream, how I'm *hurting* you. Then you can hate me." Thranduil withdrew his fingers and Celebrian clamped his legs together, fresh tears in his eyes.

"Why do I have to hate you?"
"So you can love Elrond."
"I don't want to love him. I don't want to hate you."
"You must, Celebrian. It's one of us or the other. Do your duty. Do it for me."
"Why!"
"Because I'll always love you."

Celebrian closed his eyes, unable to handle the intensity in Thranduil's.

Thranduil got up, and came back quickly. He sat right next to Celebrian, and took his right hand, pressing soing ing cold and metal into it. Celebrian opened his eyes to see what it was. A star-stone, set in silver, intricately made. "One okindkind, like you. I'll never make another like it." Thranduil said softly, sadly.

Celebrian looked at him, speechless. Thranduil took it and put it on him, clasping the chain's lock shut securely. "I wanted it to give it to you when we married. Either way, it'll be your wedding gift from me." Thranduil was crying as he touched the gem in the hollow of Celebrian's throat, leaving all his hope for himself in a life with Celebrian as his own with it when he pulled his fingers away. "Everytime you feel it or see it, I want you to remember to hate me."

*****

It was early morning when Celebrian woke alone. He dressed in the clean clothes left for him, Thranduil's own. There was no note. He went down, and found his horse easily. The other gaurds avoided his eyes. Celebrian felt shame. They had probably heard him screaming last night. They thought he had had a grand time with Thranduil up there, mating like rabbits.

They should. All the of of years, the labor of his parents and brothers, was nearly undone due to his foolishness last night. If Thranduil were not who he were, anybody could have, would have, might have; grabbed him and given him just what he was asking for.

Celebrian felt sick. He refused the food the watch offered. He got on his horse, and he went home.

It was early afternoon when he got to the border. The gaurds eyed him because he was out without his entourage of gaurds. He hung his head in shame for having left them behind. The pendant jostled heavily against his throat. Tears welled in his eyes. They let him pass.

Haldir and Rumil did not.

They followed him as he rode his horse up to the foot of thier shared talan, and when he dismounted in pain, it was into Orophin's vengeful arms he was delivered. Orophin laid him over his stout shoulder and started up the ladder. No one stopped him. Celebrian did not fight. Haldir followed them up, and Rumil after.

Orophin laid him on the bed, and looked him over, taking in the clothes, the smell of sex on him, the pain with which he moved. Then he looked away. Haldir and Rumil settled by the door, sitting. There would be no mercy from them. Shame welled in him. He shouldn't have been so ungrateful, they had done so much for him.

"Where did you go?" Orophin asked quietly.
Celebrian touched the pendant at his throat and decided to be a man. "To Mirkwood."
"Why?"
"Because I didn't want to marry Elrond." Rumil closed his eyes. Celebrian looked away from him.
"Who did you go to?"
A deep breath. "Thranduil."
"What did he say to you?"
"That I was childish and stupid and immature, and made me to see it."
"Did he touch you?" Still that flat, unemotional voice. Orophin was not his brother right now.
"Yes."
"Where did he touch you?"
"Everywhere."
"In you?"
Embarassment and shame heated his face, now. "Yes."

"Did you fight him?"
"I didn't want to."
"Did you?"
"Yes."

"Did you come inside him?"
"Only his mouth." Celebrian found himself unable to look at any of them.
"And he in you?"
"No. Not at all."
"On you, then?"
"No."

Orophin was playing the question - answer game as if nothing Celebrian said meant anything to him. It helped some, to confess it to stone.

Orophin suddenly stood up, and towered over him. His dark eyes glittered in his harsh-featured face. He slapped Celebrian. "For your pain."

Celebrian did not move. Orophin stood him up, looked deep into his eyes. It was hard for him not to cringe. What did Orophin see there? The shame he felt? The hope Thranduil had left with the bitter in that draught of pain? Orophin suddenly punched him in the gut. Hard. So hard he was knocked back the remaining four inches to the wall and nearly lifted off the ground by it. He gasped for air, eyes watering.
"For causing it in others."

Orophin had judged him. And he had judged truly. Orophin pulled him up gently by the arm not stiff from where Thranduil had bitten him. He kissed him gently on the mouth, a brothers' kiss. "For coming to your senses." Celebrian was breathless, afraid of what might come next. Another punch, followed right after by a third, all vicious and keen to hurt.
"For not doing it sooner." Celebrian nearly blacked out.
"For doing it the way you did." Celebrian crumpled to the floor.

Orophin let him fall, and did not offer comfort or pick him up. He turned and walked away, and with every step away from him, Orophin became his brother again. Orophin went to Haldir, who held him, and Rumil, who comforted him. And with shocking clarity, Celebrian grew up. They were not his brothers. He had no brothers. He never had. They were merely his friends.

Heartbroken, he got enough air into his lungs to sob. Strong, warm arms came around him, saved him from the coldness he felt looming. By Elbereth the world was so large. So very, very large and he was so small. Celebrian, brave Celebrian, was small. And he was alone. He clung to his saviord lod looked for his face.

He found the eyes that met his to be those most like his in all the world. "Ada." he breathed. "Shhh." Celeborn said, and picked him up and cradled him as if he were a wounded elfling again, and for once he actually was; new-born into the world with adult realizations. And his Ada was there to help him through it. To save him from it, to lead him into it, to hold him and let him cry. Celeborn rocked back in forth with his grown son in his arms, and Orophin sobbed in the corner as if he had killed his brother, for in truth, he had.

And his brothers cried with him.


-End Prolouge-

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A/N: Growing up can be traumatic. :(

Translations:
Ada = Daddy

Pronunciations & Notes: Celebrian is male in this one. The name changes sounds when it changes sexes. Instead of 'kell uh bree ann', it is now 'kell uh brigh in'. Think Brian. Now add \l uhl uh' to the front. You got it.