Big sticks and luscious lips.

Big sticks and luscious lips.


Title: Big sticks and luscious lips.
Pairing: Erestor/Glorfindel.
Rating: R
Notes: AU, Silly, Un-beta’d, Slash.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Summary: Erestor catches Glorfindel beating his snake...

Elladan and Elrohir had whiled away the day lounging on the forest floor, simply enjoying the gifts nature had to offer and postponing their hunting trip until they could in all fact be bothered to move. It had not been until dusk that evening that they had picked up their hunting tools, that had until then lay motionless upon the ground, and decided to quite literally, bring home the bacon.

They had indeed caught a wild boar, and a large one at that. But the boar lay unattended to on the floor, as did their weapons as they stood stone still and with mouths agape at the scene before them. They had come running when hearing what they had thought a maidens scream, but were shocked to find no helpless maiden, but their two tutors, in a most compromising position.

From what they could see, Glorfindel, their tutor in warfare, was leaning back against a rather large log, naked. That in itself, was not all that strange, but what did cause them to gasp was seeing their other tutor Erestor, with his head bowed between the mighty warrior’s thighs. Every now and then Erestor would raise his head with a look of pure disgust on his contorted face and spit something out of his mouth, and then go back down for more. All whilst Glorfindel sat with his arms resting on the log, and his head thrown back with a look of strained pain and concentration. They looked to each other however, with heat rising in their cheeks and laughter bubbling in their throats at hearing the dialogue shared between their beloved tutors of old.

“Oh Valar this taste vile!” Erestor cried amongst his spitting as he wiped the back of his hand across his mouth.

“Well I apologise but there is not much I can do about it!”

“Do not take that tone with me, if I had known that this would happen I would not of excepted your invitation to a ‘private picnic by the stream in the woods.’ This is not my idea of romantic Glorfindel!”

“I know, I know! And I am sorry, I swear I will make it up to you. But please Erestor, suck it out! I need you to suck it all out!”

“Oh you owe me Glorfindel! Never have you had such a debt over your head!”

The twins watched, utterly astounded as Erestor, with many a grumble, lowered his head to continue with what they assumed their tutors sordid and out of character activity.

“Oh please Erestor, mind your teeth!” Glorfindel hissed.

“I thought it made your legs numb?!”

“It did, all but where your lips are, please it’s very sensitive.”

They listened as they heard Erestor heave a heavy sigh.

“Surely it must all be out now, I’ve been going at it a while.”

“You need to suck it dry Erestor, you have to be sure there’s none left!”

Yet again they saw Erestor begrudgingly lower his head, and still they could not move, to shocked were they. They both quirked a brow as Erestor suddenly shot his head up; a furious blush spreading across his cheeks.

“You…I can’t believe you find this arousing!”

“I..I am sorry I can’t help it, I told you I feel very sensitive there and it’s just, seeing you, down there, doing what you’re doing…”

Erestor crossed his arms before him; the very tips of his ears turning a delightful shade of crimson.

“I am sure I must have gotten all of it by now”

“Erestor please, I am sorry but this is a matter of life and death, you have to suck it all out, there cant be any of the vile juices left inside of me!”

“But you’re….arousal…”

“Please, just try to ignore it and get on with it Erestor!”

Silence reigned through the small glade before Glorfindel sighed and spoke again.

“Oh Erestor I am sorry, I did not mean to snap at you, truly. I just, need you to do this for me.”

“Fine,” was the quiet response. It was then that Elladan and Elrohir decided to leave. Their boar forgotten as it still lay cold and unattended on the ground.

Glorfindel closed his eyes in frustration and humiliation, the day had not turned out how he had planned. He had meant for it to be utterly romantic, he had brought Erestor here to the secluded glade for a picnic, and everything had been going well, extremely well. It was when he had leaned forwards to engage Erestor in much sought after kiss, that things had gone array.

Asfaloth, who had bared them through the woods had suddenly snorted and reared up. Within moments the stallion was in a full blown panic, Glorfindel had raced from where he had been sat on blanket with Erestor to grab a reign and calm the startled horse. Though it was useless as the great horse pulled free; ignoring his masters calls as he bolted through the forest. If the fact that they had just been left stranded in the forest to walk back was not bad enough, the great steed had caused Glorfindel to loose his balance and fall into the stream they had been picnicking by.

He had dragged himself out of the surprisingly deep stream; utterly drenched and humiliated, not to mention shivering. Erestor had insisted he remove the sopping clothes and had built a fire. And despite the situation of sitting in naught but his loin cloth, when dusk had approached they had regained their somewhat romantic atmosphere. But that too, had been abruptly shattered when Glorfindel discovered first hand what it had been that had spooked his horse.

Once again he had leaned forwards in what seemed the perfect moment to kiss Erestor. Though when their lips were but an hairsbreadth away from each others, he had felt something move in the soft grass, and touch his thigh. At first he had though it Erestor, though when hearing an ominous hiss he had looked down to see a snake slithering across his thigh. And then, he experienced perhaps the most embarrassing part of the entire trip, he, a mighty slayer of demons, had screamed like a woman. A frightened woman.

But it had been to late, the snake had lashed out and bit him. Frantically he reached for something, anything to bat it away with, finally he came across a rather large stick, and proceeded to beat the snake to death with it. All whilst Erestor stood, watching, in utter shock.

When the snake, who had put up quite a fight, lay dead upon the ground, Glorfindel had dropped the stick with a sigh. Only for his legs to lose all feeling and give way beneath him. Erestor had rushed to his side and helped the warrior to pull himself up so as to be leaning against a large log.

“Erestor,” he had said, “look at the snake, please.”

“I assure you it is dead Glorfindel.”

“Nay, tell me, are there yellow spots along its back? Please tell me that I was imagining things, and that there are not yellow spots along its back.”

“I’m afraid there are yellow spots along its back.”

“Oh I do not believe it! This entire trip has been an entire disaster I really don’t…”

“Glorfindel shh, it will be alright. Give it a couple of minutes and you’ll be back on your feet, then we’ll make for home.”

“Nay Erestor, we will not. You see even if my coward of horse had not left us stranded to walk the two hour journey back to Imladris, I could not move.”

“What, why? It was just a little bite, you’ll be fine I’m sure of it,” Erestor had began worriedly.

“The snake was poisonous Erestor, and my legs are quite numb right now,” he had said in a calm state that did not befit the situation.

“Poisonous?! But we…I…we have to get you back! On your feet now!” Erestor had tried valiantly to pull Glorfindel’s weight up, but was simply unable to.

“Nay Erestor, I can not quite walk, and, and I would not make it back in time, ‘tis a strong poison.”

“But…but…”

Glorfindel had held Erestor’s head with both hands when seeing the advisor quickly lose his composure and on the verge of tears.

“Erestor, you must suck the poison out.”

“What?!”

“You must suck the poison out before it gets into my system, I will not survive otherwise.”

“Well, where were you bit?” Erestor asked quietly.

“In…in the thigh.”

“The thigh?” Erestor had squeaked; a blush creeping up into his cheeks.

“The…upper thigh,”

“Oh Valar,” Erestor ducked his head in the sheer awkwardness of the moment.

And that had been how they come to find themselves in the position they were in now. Glorfindel gasped and immediately bit his lip to keep a moan spilling from his lips. Erestor, had quite by accident, brushed the blond’s arousal that stood tall beneath the thin fabric of his loin cloth with the side of his cheek and nose. For the bite, was most unfortunately, along the very sensitive line between thigh and groin. He was only grateful that the snake had not bit any higher.

“That’s all of it, I think.” Erestor said after spitting out the last of the poison.

“Thank you, and Erestor, I’m sorry I snapped at you, it was not my intention.”

“I know,” the advisor stated quietly, though it was obvious all was not well between them. “Can you walk?”

Experimentally Glorfindel bent his knees, but knew himself to weak to make it back home.

“I can, but I can not make the journey home. And it is not safe for you to journey it alone, we should just stay here this night.”

“Very well,” Erestor nervously tugged at the grass beneath his fingers, “I will go wash my mouth out I think, and get your clothes, they should be dry now.”

Now fully dressed Glorfindel did not feel as chilled. But having insisted they extinguish their fire so as not to attract any unwanted visitors, it left only a the blanket they had been sitting upon between them during an upcoming rather cold night.

“Well I imagine I am the last person you wish to spend the night with at the moment, so here…” he held out the blanket in offering.

With a sigh Erestor snatched the blanket away, but surprised the warrior as he came and sat beside him; spreading the blanket over both of their laps.

“Lay down,” he commanded briskly and rather matter-of-factly pushed the warrior flat on his back. “You can be so juvenile at times,” he ground out between clenched teeth as he lay down beside the warrior. He snuggling close for warmth and spread the blanket equally over both of them.

“You are still chilled,” Erestor commented in a softer, less harsh tone.

“The effects of the bite I’m afraid,”

“But I thought…”

“Oh I will be fine, by morning anyway, thanks to you” he felt some small relief as Erestor smiled a small smile, and snuggled closer. “It has simply left a chill in my bones, between the bite and the stream and all…”

Erestor grinned and even chuckled.

“You are not very good at this are you?”

“Actually I usually am, its just, well it would appear when most needed, my charm and grace fled me.”

“Indeed it did,” the advisor chuckled.

“I can’t believe what a mess I have made of this evening”

“Oh I don’t know, you’re not doing so bad now.”

“Am I not?” He murmured in a low voice as he let his hand pull Erestor’s shirt loose from its leggings, to ghost up the soft flesh of his back.

“Nay, in fact, you are doing rather well. I would like that kiss now.”

“Gladly,” yet, it would appear that not only did he speak to soon, but that he was simply not meant to get his kiss that night.

“Oh, uh…oh dear..” he spoke before pulling back and away from the expectant elf laying in his arms.

“What, what is wrong?”

“I…I think that bite has left me feeling a little more than chilled…”

And with that Glorfindel made a desperate dash to the edge of the small glade, and emptied the contents of his stomach. Erestor rolled onto his back with a groan, it was clear that neither of them would find rest that night. Something, that only a few moments ago, had seemed a positive thing.

They had indeed found little rest that night, four more times Glorfindel had had to make a dash for the surrounding trees and empty his stomach. And each time he had returned he had apologised profusely to Erestor, who was simply to tired and uncomfortable to care.

There had been a brief few moments in the morning, that had been utterly precious. Glorfindel had awoken first, still feeling groggy but considerably better. But what warmed his insides, was having woken up with a slumbering Erestor all over him. He had smiled as he gently swiped back strands of black hair out of the fair councilor’s face. He loved that Erestor’s leg was draped possessively over his own, and that one of his slim hands had found its way beneath his rumpled and dirty shirt to rest against the his chest.

Though, the moment passed quickly as Erestor too woke, and both groaned as they stretched and stood. Their muscles complaining after having spent a night on the hard and cold ground.

After splashing water over their faces they picked up their blanket and empty basket, and started the long walk back. They had paused though, when seeing the dead boar that lay but a little way from the glade.

“Perhaps it died laughing,” the warrior stated and simply walked past it.

Erestor grinned.

Fortunately, Glorfindel had picked up what seemed to be hoof marks, familiar hoof marks, and a short while after that they had come across Asfaloth. The horse had been happily grazing on a healthy patch of green grass it had found. When seeing Glorfindel however, he quite happily, and without a shred of guilt walked over to his master and nuzzled into his chest.

“Oh no you don’t, just wait until I get you home. No salt licks for a week!” Though despite his words, he petted the stallions nose and smiled fondly.

Now that they rode upon Asfaloth the remaining journey home was but a short one. After leaving Asfaloth in the stables, Glorfindel had walked Erestor back to his own rooms. They stood now, in contemplative silence.

“Well Glorfindel, thank you for the picnic, it was….”

“Terrible?”

“Monstrous.”

“Hmm,” the warrior nodded in agreement. “Again, I am sorry for what happened,”

With a sigh Erestor smiled tiredly.

“Let us forget it,” he leaned forwards and kissed the warrior upon the cheek, for after a night of hearing the warrior empty his stomach, he no longer had such a burning desire to kiss the warrior as he had so wanted, at least not yet.

“I still owe you.”

“Oh you so owe me,” he replied with a grin.

“Perhaps, you will give me the chance to prove myself not a buffoon?”

“Perhaps.” Erestor grinned and then entered his rooms, he was in dire need of a bed, a bath and a toothbrush.

Glorfindel yawned as he exited his rooms, having had a proper sleep, and a long warm bath he felt almost like his old self again, the bite wound did not even pain him. He had been heading over to the stables to give Asfaloth his salt lick (and had been rolling his eyes at how the horse had him wrapped around his hoof as he went) when running into the twins. He frowned at their odd behaviour.

“Glorfindel,” they stated with a clear disdain that made the blond wonder what it was he had done to deserve such a cold reception.

“Boys,” he greeted in reply, “is there something amiss?”

Both snorted and looked to each other and then back at the warrior with mildly disguised disgust.

“We know Glorfindel, we know what happened between you and Erestor in the forest.” Elladan stated angrily, as Elrohir simply stood with arms crossed and a scowl upon his face.

“You do?” Glorfindel sighed, he had hoped Erestor would not mention what had happened to anyone.

“Aye,” Elladan replied again, if not a little more angrily at the lack of remorse shown by their Captain, “we know what it was you made Erestor do!”

“Oh this is so embarrassing, I had hoped Erestor would not tell anyone,” he sighed, but this proved to only inflame the elder twins ire. Elrohir, continued to stand and glare in stony silence.

“What?!” Elladan had shouted, taking Glorfindel by surprise, “how could you make Erestor do such a thing when he obviously did not want to? We thought him dear to you!”

“I had no choice, I needed someone to suck it out and he was the only one there!”

What happened next, took them all by surprise. Glorfindel took three rapid steps back after the unexpected blow, only just keeping his balance. Elladan stared aghast at his brother, who in turn stood with a look of equal shock, glancing from his raised fist to Glorfindel’s quickly bruising cheek.

“You hit me!” Glorfindel shouted in disbelief.

“’Ro you hit Glorfindel!”

“’Dan, I hit Glorfindel!”

All three stood there in suspended shock and silence, before abruptly, Elrohir simply turned and fled. Elladan glanced back at Glorfindel, and seeing the confused anger in those famous blue eyes, he quickly followed his brother. Leaving Glorfindel standing alone, gently massaging his cheek and wondering what in Arda had just happened.

“Oh I just do not want to know!” He growled to himself, he would question the twins later, and if they were lucky, he may not inform their father. Now however, he simply wanted to find Erestor. And he freely admitted to himself, that he needed a hug.

It did not take Glorfindel long to find Erestor, for he had intercepted him in the hallway. And without even thinking it through and in a sudden bought of spontaneity, he pulled Erestor into the nearest doorway closet and slammed the door behind them.

“Glorfindel what are you…”

“Shh,” Glorfindel pressed a finger to the advisor’s lips and made fast work of the laces to Erestor’s leggings. All whilst kissing along the advisor’s neckline; making him gasp in a most lovely manner.

Once the leggings came loose, Glorfindel rashly pulled them down as he fell to his knees. He was satisfied to see that his abrupt surprise had had the desired effect and had completely aroused Erestor.


Without warning or any teasing touches, Glorfindel took the whole of Erestor’s length into his throat and sucked, hard. Erestor cried loudly above him, and grasped desperately at the blond’s shoulders. Erestor ran his hands along the shelves behind him, trying to find anything to hold onto in support, which sent objects crashing to the floor left and right. Glorfindel held tightly onto the thrusting hips and delighted in every frantic moan and pant that came from above him. With the fast and furious pace he set it took but a few minutes before Erestor was spilling with a cry, down his throat.

Releasing the sated member from his mouth he wiped t his chin and stood to face a very flushed advisor, and grinned smugly.

“What…what was that?” Erestor asked between breaths.

“I simply wished to show you that I am not as ungraceful as you may think I am,” he murmured huskily as he rubbed his nose against Erestor’s.

“Hmm…..your left foot is in a bucket by the way”

Glorfindel blinked at Erestor, and then glanced down at his left foot, which was indeed lodged in a bucket. He sighed.

“Perhaps next time then.”

Erestor laughed, a mirthful and delighted laugh which made Glorfindel grin and bare his umpteenth humiliation with just a little more ease.

“Can I kiss you now?”

“Hmm, you had better.”

Glorfindel had sighed in relief and slowly leaned in for the kiss he had coveted and suffered through bountiful embarrassment for.

“Wait,” Erestor held his hand against the warrior’s chest, pushing him back, “what is that?” He asked with a frown as he indicated to the fresh bruise on the warrior’s cheek.

“Oh this, well, I came across the twins earlier, and they were not pleased with what happened between us in the forest. So, Elrohir thought to punch me.”

“Elrohir?!” Erestor asked with eyes wide, for Elrohir was known to be the more rational and calm of the twins.

“Indeed, you know, I could be wrong….no wait, I’m right, Elrohir I think has developed quite the infatuation with you.”

“Oh do not be silly,”

“Why else would he punch me?”

…..

“Exactly, and it’s not so hard to believe, I have quite the obsession with you myself.”

“But he punched you?”

“Indeed, hard. I really wish you had not told anyone of what happened in the woods.”

“I did not.” Erestor shrugged,

“Well then how do they know? I did not tell anyone.”

Erestor furrowed his brow for a moment in thought, and rolled his eyes as the solution suddenly came to him a moment later.

“The twins were hunting yesterday,” when Glorfindel frowned Erestor continued, “the boar Glorfindel, you remember the boar that had been slain but not taken?”

“Oh Valar they saw! And what it must of sounded like!”

Both roared with helpless laughter. An elf that happened to be passing the closet paused with a raised brow when hearing such boisterous laughter come from within, with a perplexed but amused expression he simply moved on, thinking the closets of Imladris haunted by mirthful spirits.

“Ai Glorfindel, what are we to do? We must explain to the twins at least.”

“Aye, I suppose we had better. I still can’t believe Elrohir dared to strike me, though I admit he looked terrified after realising what it was he had done. He will have to know some form of punishment.”

“I am hiding all large sticks from you.”

Glorfindel snorted. “Nay, I think him seeing me kiss these luscious lips of yours will set him straight, and tell him that you are unavailable.”

“A sound plan, though perhaps, you had best run this kiss by me first, just to make sure that they will have the desired effect.”

“Mmm,”

And finally their lips met, in an upward curve of a smile as they gently pressed and moved against each others. And so they remained that way for some time, kissing in that closet. Erestor with his leggings around his knees and Glorfindel with his left foot in a bucket. And it was only passing elves who had any inkling to their presence, though they shrugged it off as lusty spirits who haunted the closets of Imladris.

The End.