Faithless

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I don't make money off it. I'm a poor, but humble (at least most of the time) student/librarian-type thing. Who would want to sue me? Was it the incident when I kicked someone's camel?


Faithless


"Faithless is he who says farewell when the road darkens." -Tolkien


Chapter 1


"Reality is what refuses to go awaen Ien I stop believing in it..." - Philip K. Dick


Elrond entered his son's room accompanied by a look of frustration and affection. They were simply adorable nestled up to each other, hands entwined and identical looks of exhaustion and delight plastered upon their faces. He despised the location of their rooms, right next to his on both sides. Yet they were luckily away from anyone else's. Their screams, moans, and squeals were easily heard, although somewhat muffled by walls and pillows.

Elladan yawned snuggling his face into Elrohir's neck when Elrond sighed in observation of the display left from the love making that had occurred nearly fifteen minutes earlier. The twins' naked forms lay atop each other, pale skin shimmering in the candlelight. The blanket was beneath them, knocked halfway off the bed. They had both taken after their father with raven black hair – in more places than one, Elrond thought. They, in public at least, carried samesame dignity and honorable will... Elrond sighed... And then they had their mother's eyes...

It wasn't that it was wrong, or Elrond thought it wrong, simply that his mind wasn't willing to accept it. He would eventually, but now he couldn't care less. He closed the door, leaving Elrohir's room and walking to his own. As usual, it was lit dimly, darkening roomroom. It had stayed that way after Celebrian's departure to the Havens... In the far corners of his mind, it was he that he had truly blamed for her torment. He felt she shouldn't go, but had said nothing. Then –

The cork of the wine he had been opening popped off. The scenes played through his mind while he poured the remainder of the bottle into his goblet. Collapsing into a chair, he stared silently into the fire, sipping until the glass was drained. Anyone looking in would have pitied the sight. Elrond was sobbing in guilt, face buried in his hands.

He had resisted weeping for an entire week. He didn't want to, he wanted to retain some dignity. He was too proud, too stubborn... Stubborn... Elrond gave a choked cry. Celebrian had constantly told him he was stubborn... He had wept before, and remembered crying the most, when Gil-Galad's death came.

Elrond recalled weeping the night away when sensing it. When Gil-Galad had given him Vilya, it was more as if he had placed his life into his hands. Life was so difficult to figure out and he was so tired. He began to get up and fell back into the chair. The wine had taken effect sooner than he'd thought, and he had doubted how strong the wine of Mirkwood was. One glass, and now he could not even remove himself from a mere seat. He began to cry in frustration as he recalled once doing as a child.

"Oh, Elrond," Glorfindel said, sighing. He was looking in from the hall passing by. Elrond hadn't seemed well at the council but for him to weep... Elrond had taken Celebrian's departure, the few days before...five, he thought, worse than he had even imagined. Laying a warm hand upon Elrond's shoulder, the blond elf whispered soothing words until Elrond calmed himself a bit more. Glorfindel helped him to the bed with encouraging words and
motherly care.

Then, the most unexpected thing happened. Elrond clung to him, sobbing into his chest, muttering, "Please say you'll stay... Please... I'm afraid to be alone..." Either Elrond was indeed quite drunk, or this had driven him to fear of solitude. Probably both, thought Glorfindel. Glorfindel looked down at the Elven lord – his lord, once a great and powerful leader and warrior, and now reduced to this, a weeping child. Ai, Elbereth... He had been in this darkened room all week.

After a few minutes of "I'll stay" 's, "Quiet now, I'm here" 's, and kisses to Elrond's forehead, Elrond had finally managed to fall asleep in Glorfindel's arms, closing his eyes. "Goodnight, dear Elrond. Sleep well," Glorfindel whispered into the lord's ear. "My, what an imbroglio there shall be in the morning..." He pulled the blanket over Elrond and himself and fell asleep as well.


* * *

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around." - Leo Buscaglia


Elrond groaned. His head hurt severely, and his stomach wasn't in much better health. Why DID his head hurt? All he could remember from the night before was glancing at his sons and then drinking the remainder of some wine. It couldn't have been the cause from a small glass, could it? Unless... it hurt his head to much to think. He nuzzled closer to his pillow, at least he thought it was a pillow. It was silky on his face and strangely warm...

He opened his eyes. This could not have been a pillow...but it probably was. It was every other morning for the past eight days. He had often woken up expecting to wake to the sight of eyes that were a perfect mimicry of Galadriel's or Celeborn's blond-white hair.

To his surprise, blond hair was across his face. He could even smell a fragrance very much like oranges. He'd always loved the smell of oranges. Celebrian! His Celebrian... "Celebrian!" he whispered into the neck of the creature. He moaned softly, even a whisper was beyond painful.

Glorfindel woke to his voice allowing his opened eyes to come into focus of his surroundings. Elrond thought he was Celebrian... Ai, Elbereth... Why was life so complicated?

Elrond was now whispering love phrases in some sort of language he couldn't quite understand. They were meant with all his heart, along with the kisses softly littering his neck, but not for him. For a while, he considered allowing Elrond the few minutes' happiness that he deserved after all he had – Glorfindel's eyes were wide as he pulled away. Elrond had licked his neck and his breath still smelled of wine, he noticed.

"Celebri– Glorfindel?" Elrond asked in shock.

"Yes, My Lord, but you don't understand." He would tell him most of the night's events as though it was entirely his own fault. Elrond blamed himself enough, but to know he had begged him to stay... It would have been too much for him to handle.

"I need no explanation. Forgive me," Elrond sighed, yet again close to tears. Elrond was in a hellish misery, from which he could not escape, and Glorfindel felt it was his duty to comfort him. When Celebrian had left on visits to Lorien, Elrond was never bothered in the least bit. The lord had always assumed they'd be toge for for eternity and the years passed as easily as weeks.

Glorfindel looked to him. "I merely thought – Nothing happened. I only thought you might need the comfort and...um...warmth. It has been...um...so cold... It was my fault, I assure you." Needless to say, Glorfindel was a horrible liar.

Elrond tried suppressing a whimper and Glorfindel shook his head. "It's your own fault. If you wanted wine, you should have drank something light from Lorien, not that poison from Mirkwood. I'll go get you some water and mix something together to ease the pain."

"Yes, Glorfindel." Elrond managed a small, slight nod only to receive an even more painful throb. "...Thank you..." Elrond was content with that said. Glorfindel left Elrond's chamber thinking he had became a mother to Elrond, and at that time, it was exactly what he needed.


* * *


"Life is a long lesson in humility." – James M. Barrie


Elrond yawned, pulling the covers up to his chin. As much as he hated to admit it, he liked having Glorfindel take care of him. He had admired the blond lord for the longest – Suddenly, he remembered the events of last night. Well, bits and pieces of it at least. Glorfindel was...different.

Instead of sarcasm and little concern, he gave Elrond motherly care. Exactly how long had he sobbed into Glorfindel's chest? He remembered only that it was plenty of time for what seemed like a hundred brushes of Glorfindel's lips to Elrond's forehead and tearstained cheeks. Elrond cried without shame, wanting ever so desperately to have that embrace once more.


* * *


"You can complain because rosebushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses."
- Unknown

Elrond glanced up and focused hard upon Glorfindel, which wasn't as easy as it might seem. He was still suffering the after effects of the wine, his eyes were filled with tears, and he was still somewhat drunk. After staring a few seconds, he looked down dizzily.

"Oh, 'Rondy," Glorfindel sighed gently setting down the platter. "What's wrong now?" he asked, calmly placing a cool hand on his head letting his fingers stroke through the dark hair.

"I missed you..." Elrond looked up with childhood innocence, trying to change the subject and pouting slightly. Glorfindel smiled tenderly, placing his hands upon Elrond's shoulders and letting them gently massage his back. Glorfindel assumed the affects of the wine were still gradually wearing off, for Elrond cuddled close to him, yawned, and fell asleep with his hand and arm lying atop the middle of Glorfindel's arm.

Glorfindel kissed the slightly smaller sleeping elf on the forehead and
pulled the covers around him. Glorfindel amused himself by toying with
Elrond's currently unkempt hair. First, he reached to the table nearby to
retrieve a comb. Then, as carefully as possible, so as not to wake him, he ran the silver comb through the midnight black hair.

Elrond muttered in his sleep, yawned once more, and turned onto his back
facing Glorfindel. He was asleep and his eyes were closed, Glorfindel
observed. He was beautiful, as always.


To be Continued...