Haldir's Sweet Abigail

Title: Haldir’s Sweet Abigail

Rating: NC-17

Author: Ambur

Beta: Fianna

Disclaimer” Haldir belongs to Tolkien and Abigail is mine. No money being made off this. I write only for the enjoyment it gives me.

Warning: adult sitons,ons, angst

Summary: This is a companion piece to ng’sng’s Obsession. This is told strictly from Haldir’s POV. He is reflecting on how he first met and fell in love with Abigail. He is also coming to grips with his own rage toward what has happened to her. Has Haldir lost her to her own grief, or can his love bring her back to him?

Author’s note: I know, I swore no more angst. I promised happiness and humor, romance and adventure. I’m working on that too, I’ve just got to finish this one up first.

Feedback: Yes, I am one of those authors who desire it greatly! Feedback is my precioussess! haldirswhore69@yahoo.com

**

The room is lit only by the moon. I sit with my back against the head board of my bed, cradling the sob wracked elleth I love so dearly. I would give my very soul if I could only lessen her sorrow and shame. She thinks I do not know of his treachery, of his lies and manipulation of one so sweet and dear. Oh, my sweet Abigail, I should have never left you. Forgive me my love, for leaving you so helpless at the hands of a tyrant. At the hands of the one I have served for so many millennia!

I am struggling with my own tears…my own rage! I feel such rage that it will eat me alive and I can do nothing. The fires of my hatred are engulfing me as I sit here with her, my precious little one. Had it not been for my Lady, I would have killed him.

Abigail will not speak to me; she will not even look at me. She thinks I would find her to blame. Never! I could never find fault with one such as you, my lovely one.

I found her huddled in her own talan after it had happened. She clutched the cloak that he had put around her naked body tightly to her. She was preparing to bathe. I could see the horror and shame in her eyes when she beheld me. I could see the look of panic and fear come over her. I know this is why she tried to run from me. My dear, sweet Abigail, you could not escape me. Nothing would ever make me let you go. I am yours for always and you are mine.

I captured her easily around her waist as she tried to flee. Scooping her up gently into my arms, I carried her trembling body back to my talan where I could sit and hold her in my arms until the end of days if need be. I could hear her weak cries, No, No, do not look at me…I am tainted…

Tainted? You are pure and innocent! It is not you who is tainted, sweet Abigail. It is that wretched elf whom I shall take my revenge upon soon, very soon. His Lady will not stay my hand for long.

Her cries are softer now. I am glad of it for I was afraid she would make herself ill. I stroke her hair, speaking softly to her. Whether she can hear me or not I do not know. Her distress and grief are too strong. I lift her chin to look into her sweet face. By Eru, she is even lovely when she cries. Her tears are as clear as crystal, tears that sparkle like diamonds as they spill over her cheeks. Her eyes are swollen from her crying, but that is not what alarms me. I shake her gently, calling her name softly as she stares past me blankly. I see only nothingness in the depths of her eyes. I move to lay her on the mattress and take her small hand in mine.

Abigail! Abigail! Beloved! Speak!

I can hear my voice growing frantic. Suddenly and unwillingly, my own tears burst through the dam that had been holding them. I grab her to me as my own body now trembles in fear.

Abigail…please…come back to me…Abigail…

**

Days have passed and she still has not spoken. Her eyes are haunted and dark. She does not eat nor sleep. She only stares. I can feel her life force leaving her slowly each day. My own heart is breaking and I know I am dying with her. In my delirium I think back to happier days.

Do you remember my sweet, the first day we met? I remember it as clearly as if it had happened yesterday. I had just returned from a seven month campaign against the dark armies. I was war worn; ragged, weary. I had withdrawn into myself. So many had been lost. I never thought I would find beauty and tenderness in the world again, but then my breath caught in my throat…I had just laid eyes upon you.

You were in the garden with the Lady, your glorious silver hair flowing in beautiful waves down your back. You were holding several rosprespresenting them to the Lady as you gifted yourself to her with your service. You had caught the eyes of many of my wardens that day. I heard the whispers. You had just returned from a very long stay from the lands of Mirkwood. I smiled in the knowledge that Lothlorien truly experienced the return of an angel that day.

By Illuvator, you wereatheathtaking. I heard your soft giggles as you walked arm and arm with Galadriel. I never thought to have heard any sweeter music than your gentle laugh. It caressed my ears, washing away the months and months of the angry hate filled cries of the enemy. I knew that very day that you would be mine.

You were so shy…often I wondered if I would ever be successful in my wooing of you. How many sweets and roses did I bestow upon you before you would even grant me your company for a walk in the gardens you so loved?

Ah, but were it not for my Lady intervening, I do not think you would ever have spoken to me, only giggling softly and batting your eyelashes at me when you would pass me along the walk ways of the city.

Sweet Abigail…dear lovely Abigail…you bewitched me the instant I beheld you.

So often you reminded me of an elfling with your constant chatter and curiosity of things. My heart was gladdened to see such as you, one whom could still find the beauty and innocence of such a harsh world. So many times I would fight the urge to crush your soft body against mine when you would grab my hand and pull me through the forest, wanting to share with me the things of the earth that brought you so much pleasure and joy. Nay, I did not! I resisted! You were but an innocent and I did not wish to frighten my sweet Abigail.

I shall cherish the memory of our first kiss until the day I am called west. I cannot put into words the elation I feel in knowing I was your teacher. To know that I was the first male to ever make you tremble so with desire. To know that I was the very first elf you ever loved.

You are my heart, my very life’s breath lies within you. When I close my eyes I feel you…taste you…I can smell you… your smell is of a fresh spring breeze blowing the delicate scent of daisies and baby’s breath along the air. Your lips are as sweet as vanilla and your skin as soft as satin. I cannot get enough of you. I cannot go on without you.

Do you remember when we first made love, Abigail? You were so very excited, but so very nervous. I had to bite my lip to keep from chuckling at your nervousness. It was the night of the winter ball. The forest looked as if it had been painted shimmering white as the snow was sparkling under the clear, full moon. You were so very lovely with your hair pulled back elegantly and twisted within a wreath of pale pink flowers. Your tiny neck was ever so delicate and soft. I could smell the scent of lilacs upon your skin. Your crystal blue eyes sparkled under the soft glow of the candles.

I remember how you felt in my arms, so small and tender. I was afraid I might break you if I held you too tightly against me. You stood on the tips of your toes, trying desperately to reach my ear to tell me your secret. I chuckled softly when you whined, your lovely little face contorting into a pout. I lifted you off the ground and you were as light as a feather. I could feel the warmth of your breath against my cheek and I wondered if you could feel the tremble of desire that coursed through me.

You told me how you wished this night to be so very special. You told me you wished to give yourself to me this very night. I could not believe you would be so bold, my sweet Abigail…so very shy and innocent. We danced late into the night together before slipping away in silence.

I remember how you looked at me, standing in the middle of my bed chamber. Your eyes were wide and uncertain, but you trusted me all the same. I swore to you that night that I would lovu anu and protect you always. I swore to you that I would never let you go and I would cherish you until the end of the world. No harm would befall you and I would never leave you.

Forgive me…sweet Abigail…come back…do not leave me…I will die…

Slowly you slid your gown from your body, letting it pool at your feet. You offered me your hand, beckg meg me to come to you.ouldould not speak. Never had I seen such perfection…such flawless beauty!

I lifted you into my arms, placing you gently on my bed. My body covered yours, pressing you into the soft folds of the mattress. I placed butterfly kisses along your neck line in between nipping and suckling your skin. I could not help but smile when you giggled softly as my tongue tickled you.

My hand glided down your soft curves to find the apex of your thighs. A groan escaped my lips when you parted your milky thighs, allowing me access to your most guarded secret. I began stroking you as you arched into me, moaning softly. Your folds were so slick…so wet…so soft…

I had to struggle with my intense need to taste your sweetness. I feared it would be too much for you this night, my sweet. Your soft moans set the pace of my rhythm as you moved against my hand. Your eyes were closed, your face relaxed as you allowed this new sensation to work its will through you. I watched the expressions on your face as your head thrashed back and forth, the flush to your beautiful body driving me mad with desire. I feared I could’ve spilled my seed upon you watching the pleasure that I brought you.

Never did I hear such a lovely sound as my name falling from your lips as you coated my fingers with your sweet essence. I could not help myself as I brought my fingers to my lips leily lly licking your nectar from my fingers, inhaling deeply the musky scent of your desire.

I could barely contain my own desire to bury myself deep within your velvety softness. As if understanding my need, I felt your legs wrap around my waist. You took my face within your tiny hands, placing a chaste kiss on my lips…love me Haldir…make me yours…

And love you I did.

I can still remember your warmth encasing me as I sank gently into your tight, slick channel. By Illuvator, you were so delicate…so lithe…so silky. I wanted to push myself deep within you, to stay within you forever. I wanted to claim you for my very own. My eyes were smoldering with hunger for you but you were not afraid. You trusted me completely, giving yourself to me body and soul.

I pushed past your barrier and you cried out. I remember kissing the single tear that slid down your lovely cheek. You clung to me as you waited for the pain to pass.

Yes, my lovely…hold onto me…open yourself to me and feel my love for you pour over you…I lovu fou for always…

Slowly I began to move within you. I could see the sketches of pain across your brow, though you tried to be so brave for me. Sweet Abigail, I could hear your muffled cries as you buried your face against my shoulder. How I wish I could have taken the pain away, no matter how brief it was. It broke my heart to see you suffer so.

I could feel the tension leave your body slowly as you tightened your hold on my waist. I was delighted when you began to move with me, your hips thrusting upwards to meet mine. The soft cooing sounds falling from your lovely mouth only stirred my fires stronger. I could feel your vaginal muscles clinging to me as if beckoning me to spill myself within you.

My thrusting became more urgent and once again I could see the slight sketches of pain across your brow. Your beautiful, bright smile comforted me. I should haven thn the one to offer comfort, but you were too good to me…always so selfless…loving me unconditionally. I did not deserve you…I do not deserve you.

I could bear it no longer when I heard your cry, my name falling from your lips. I followed you with a hoarse shout and poured myself into you, my hot seed scorching your silken center. I collapsed on top of you. I was crushing you I know, but I could not stand to move away from you. You are as gentle and mild as a dove.

Bdgindgingly, I rolled away from you taking you with me and pulling you into my embrace. I could hear your soft cries and feel the warm tears to my bare chest. I tilted your head, afraid I would see regret, but did not. I struggled to remain composed as I looked into the depths of your eyes. Never had I seen such love and tenderness, it brought tears to my own eyes. How could you love me like that? How could you love me so completely and perfectly?

**

Can you hear me Abigail? Will you not speak to me? Once again I am holding her in my arms. She stares at nothing; her lovely blue eyes are clouded with despair. My heart is bleeding…aching with a pain I have never known.

Oh, my sweet Abigail. Will you return to me? Or will you leave me to suffer this world alone? Surely you know I would die without you. I would welcome death if it meant I would be reunited with you for always and forever, never to part again.

Abigail, if you go I shall follow. Wait for me, my love…