The Last Luster

The Last Luster
Author: Isabel schemes
Pairings: Glorfindel/ Erestor, Glorfindel/ Erestor / Elrond, mild Glorfindel/ Elrond
Rating: NC-17 (in later chapters)
Warnings: Graphic Male/Male sex, borderline NCS, mentions of domestic abuse
Summary: Erestor has lost all luster for life, and he needs friends, even love, to pull him out from a self-induced darkness.


Part One: Safe and Sound, or so He Thought

Glorfindel huffed in frustration as he tripped on a lush velvet rug, again. He was in a hurry to meet Lord Elrond for his daily afternoon report and tea, and as the clock slowly ticked towards five o’clock, Glorfindel began to loose hope of bathing beforehand. Sweeping into his rooms, Glorfindel lay down the worn saddle he’d been carrying from the barns, stripped off his riding clothes and slipped into the outdoor pool that served as a bath. He had brought the saddle back to his rooms so he could repair the leather that had long served him in combat riding. It was another task Glorfindel found himself digging into that he really didn’t need to do.
The pool was naturally warm, and after a hard day of training, the calm water was perfect to bathe sore muscles. Glorfindel hurried through his bath, and jumped out into his garden to dry off. He could hear the young trees giggle at his nudity, and he smiled in response. In the distance he could hear the bell tolling, reminding him of his meeting with Elrond. Along his walled garden, Glorfindel left his laundry up to dry over the flowerbed before running back inside to pull on new clothes. He left his room as he normally did, clothes and gadgets to “work” on strewn about.
By the time Glorfindel made it to Elrond’s study, the maid had come with the tea and was waiting for Elrond to let her in. Which was unusual, because Glorfindel was late and he could hear Elrond’s raised voice from within. The maid smiled at him and shrugged her shoulders. He was about to sit down when the massive wooden door swung open and Erestor strolled out, looking distressed and quite frail. Elrond appeared to be fuming, addled with frustration and regret.

“Erestor!” Glorfindel greeted warmly, reaching out for the advisor but retracted when the elf shied away from his touch.
Upon recognizing the golden advisor, Erestor smiled quietly at Glorfindel, the same reserved smile he’d always given Glorfindel. Before Erestor could slip off, the golden elf posed him a question.

“May I come by to see you this evening?”

Erestor smiled and nodded, bowing slightly before continued away. Glorfindel watched his friend disappear down the hall, again noticing the worry lines accumulated on his face and the hollows in his cheeks. Erestor was not taking care of himself, as usual. Glorfindel only had a moment to watch his dark haired interest before he disappeared entirely. Erestor’s culminating illness was alarming to Glorfindel, but he had yet to break through the rocky walls guarding Erestor’s heart.
Glorfindel took the tea tray from the confused maid before heading into see his Lord. Chances were Erestor had unwittingly set off Elrond, and now the afternoon seemed grim for Glorfindel. He had spent entire evenings trying to explain Erestor to his Lord, trying to calm Elrond down and usually to no avail.


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“Of all the things he could have asked me, he had to ask that! He knows I despise balls, and especially young elves. He knows I’m terrible at party planning and he knows I don’t like large clusters of elves! Why would he ask that!!?” Erestor’s mind was flooding with angry thoughts. Once again, Elrond had asked him to plan a coming of age ball, this time in honor of the twins Elladan and Elrohir. That would mean Erestor would have to pick out decorations, decide on a menu and wine, write up a guest list, and worst of all, socialize with other elves. There were so many points in party planning where he could go wrong, where he could forget the details or pick out the very thing everyone hated to eat. And the worst part of the job was as Host; dressing up in silly, expensive, frilly garments and prancing from table to table meeting Elves and inquiring about their health and wealth, when really he didn’t care. It was job he could never do, even while he lived in Lothlorien with Aiglos. Erestor hated conversation, and he was no good at talking to elves he didn’t like. He always ended up stammering and falling over his tongue - sweating profusely and eventually making a sad excuse to escape. The only elves he talked to were Elrond, for work, and Glorfindel, when the blonde pestered him into conversation (although he had recently become fond of the blonde’s attentions). Needless to say, Erestor had politely refused the job and Elrond forced it right back on him.

As he made his way back to his rooms, Erestor began to concentrate on emptying his mind of all the agonizing garbage he had created, and tried to focus on Glorfindel’s visit. It would do him no good to be mad at Elrond, nor would it be good to analyze his motives. Elrond always tried to do things like this, and he had finally succeeded. Now Erestor needed to plan this stupid party, and he knew that he would most likely fail and that upset him the most. He would ruin the twins’ special day, and that very notion had Erestor green in the cheeks. Erestor had always loved the twins, ever since they first came to him begging for lessons in war history and common speech. His love however, was from a distance and seemingly cold. This party was perhaps his one chance of showing the twins he cared deeply for them, and they’d never know because his “party” would end up mangled by his inability in society. Erestor knew he’d rather spend his lifetime loving from a distance than messing up, again. That was how it was with Elrond, and especially Glorfindel. It was the only safe way he knew how to love. Ever since his last encounter with love and courtship, Erestor had adapted this method as a way of self-protection.

Of course, he had heard the rumors circulating the Elves at tea time. The rumors saying his heart was cold and barren, that he was cruel so he had no friends, that he was a sickly creature who’d soon suffer elvish fading and worst of all, to explain his illness they rumored that he was a prude. To be a prude was the worst shame in Elven society, to be incapable of giving and receiving pleasure, to be afraid of finding comfort in another’s arms was a great grievance among the fair folk.

“And so what?” Erestor thought. He was afraid of love, of falling in love like young elves did: completely and incurably so. He was frightened of sex, and frightened of seeing his body any further than his parents taught him he should. He told himself that his fear was natural and good, that it kept him safe and sound. He told himself he wasn’t fading, that his sickness was passing and that he liked working and drinking hard; his health was fine. He thought he was fine and so he told everyone else.

When Erestor finally reached his rooms tucked away from the communal lawns, he was exhausted and wretched. He decided to put the whole mess out of his head till morning. So instead of thinking, Erestor took up his favorite occupation: drinking, and while he was at it, looked over the mountains of paperwork sitting on his bed. He could tend to work before a chat with Glorfindel.


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Elrond, Lord of the Last Homely House, did not look at Glorfindel as he entered the room. He simply glared out the window, watching the golden sun slowly sink behind the edges of his valley. He recognized the sound of glass hitting wood as his companion set down the tea tray, awaking his senses to the warm aroma and the clinking of china cups. He sighed and sat down again, motioning vaguely for Glorfindel to seat himself.

“Well?” Glorfindel asked. The guardian and long time advisor was curious about Elrond’s encounter with Erestor. It was not often that the two disagreed, and even less often when they could not compromise.

“I asked him to host the twins’ coming of age party. I thought it would be a nice way for Erestor to meet some new elves, and prove to the rest of Imladris that he’s approachable – to spring back into friendship with the people he serves. Of course, he refused. He complains that he’s incapable and unwilling – as if that should make a difference!” Elrond seethed, grappling with his tea cup. Taking a sip, the Lord sobered a bit and continued on.

“I don’t understand what’s happened to him. When he first came to my employment he was always eager to take jobs that were not his forte, especially parties! He was always full of laughter and love; enthralled with life! But these recent years have seen a change in our friend. He no longer finds courage to move beyond his strengths. His body is frail, as though his marrow has weakened his bones and sucked the very joy out of him. It’s as if he only exists on dredges, expending himself far too much and without the passion and fervor he used to have. He’s no longer a youthful, mischievous companion; he’s now the longing, scared elf who’s withering away with the leaves of autumn,”

“I think perhaps, he bit off more than he could chew, that he suddenly found parties and close friendships to have lost its appeal. He suddenly saw the risk in everything, for example – you know he was always timid about matters of the bed, and maybe the custom of bedding close friends scared him away,” Glorfindel offered quietly, swallowing a mouthful of tea.

“Since when? When did such a tragedy befall my friend? When did he loose his joys to fear? And what caused him to do so?” Elrond pondered darkly. Glorfindel had no answer for him, and instead lost his gaze in his cup. Elrond was right. Every time Elrond said the same things about Erestor, Glorfindel knew he was right. There was a great, terrible change in Erestor’s heart and no amount of questioning would bring them an answer.

“How did training go today? Are the new recruits measuring up to your standards?” Elrond inquired, although they both knew he didn’t really care about the answer.

“They’re coming along, slowly but surely. Several students already show their potential in leadership and strategy, while still others prove their war mongering and incompetence,” Glorfindel replied and they both shared a laugh, “But don’t worry m’Lord, they’ll measure up in the end,”

“Good. I expect nothing less,”

Silence followed as more tea was poured, and more tea consumed. Outside the sun fell behind the ridge and the last luster of daylight faded from the flowers and river. Young elflings just past their majority were running barefoot on the lawns, chasing one another in gleeful games and burbling with loving laughter. Couples of males, or females, or both could be seen emerging from their rooms into the courtyards, holding hands or carrying a child to dinner. The household staff was setting up tables in the largest lawn, while other elves helped them by setting up dishes and lanterns. This in itself was the spirit of his home, Glorfindel thought. This community, this haven of love and communion with the natural world was the way his people lived. The trees were singing with the joys of their elvish friends, bending their limbs to allow a lantern to rest on their arm, or to kiss an alda or elven companion. This was the way it ought to be, Glorfindel thought.
And suddenly the thought that Erestor was missing out on this collection of love was unbearable. For a long time Glorfindel had pursued Erestor’s love, but had been content to allow Erestor his privacy, but he could do that no longer – for both of them. Erestor was ill, whether he knew it or not, and his loneliness had carried on too long. Something had to be done.

“Elrond, we need to help Erestor,” Glorfindel stated loudly, setting his cup down on the table.

“Yes,” Elrond murmured in reply, “but how?”

“We don’t let him sulk anymore. We don’t let him eat alone in his chambers; in fact we never let him alone. I don’t want to loose him. ‘Ro… I feel him slipping away now. I… I never realized until this night how long he’s tarried on like this, and I can’t bear it,” Glorfindel proclaimed wearily and he felt himself breaking apart. His words were true, he’d never realized how far gone Erestor was until now. Glorfindel shuddered as he felt his friend wrap him up in strong arms. Elrond tucked the blonde’s head underneath his chin and held him firmly. Slow tears shyly found their way to his cheeks and Glorfindel knew he would be ashamed, but he didn’t care. He wiped away the tears and pulled away from the tight embrace until he was holding waists with his friend. He’d wasted enough time. It was time for him to go bring Erestor out of his darkness.

“We’ll pull him out, don’t worry mellon,” Elrond comforted, and let Glorfindel go to his love.