Love's Shadow

Love's Shadow

By: Bonnie a.k.a Artemis
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Dominic/Orlando Viggo/Orlando
Summary: One month after Dominic's death, Viggo tries to confort Orlando.
Disclaimer: If this were really happening I would be fucking all the LOTR boys on a nightly basis.
Warnings: ANGST!!! lol This is a deathfic so you might need a tissue. Or if you don't like it, don't read it.


The clubs music pounded through his ears. The neon lights flashed and flickered in front of him. He didn't seem to notice. It was all part of the dull roar of reality that had left him just a month ago. He took another shot down his throat. He didn't even remember what he ordered. He didn't care. The music changed beat and so did the dancers in front of him. The men and women in the club seemed to be dancing in slow motion. He looked around and was about to order another shot, when someone put their hand on his shoulder and said in his ear, "Orlando."

He knew immediately who it was. It was Viggo, former lover of those years in New Zealand, and friend. He could never mistake the touch of his hand or the deep soft sound of his voice. He turned around and gave him a fake smile.

"Vig, new place to hang out, mate? Not like you." He turned his head and made a gesture to the bar tender for another round.

"I've come to take you home, Orli." The chocolate eyes that met him weren't the one's Viggo knew. They seemed dull and vacant, no spark of the former Orlando seemed to be there. The dark dark circles around them also told Viggo that Orlando hadn't been sleeping.

"Why, mate? I'm havin' too much fun." He said laughing and looking around. The bartender gave him the drink and with a quick jerk of his neck he drank another shot.

"Elijah called me, Orli." His blue eyes looked of concern and sadness. "He told me that you were goin' out tonight. He sounded worried, like you might do something."

"Like kill myself?" He cut in sharply. "'S ok, Vig. That is too easy." He put his hand on Viggo's shoulder. He felt the black leather of his jacket underneath his sweaty palm. He gave him a wink and another fake smile and then headed off to the dance floor.

But Viggo gripped the fabric of Orlando's black shirt. "I'm taking you home." He rted.ted.

"I'll get home fine on my own! Now just leave me, I don't need a fucking baby-sitter!" He turned and flash of annoyance and anger met Viggo.

"Your in no condition to drive. Come on, let me take care of you tonight."

"No!"

"Damnit Orlando! You haven't been yourself, we all haven't, but you, you have barely said a word about it and shown any emotion."

"Everyone is different, Vig." Orlando shouted and then he pulled his way toward the dance floor. But o gro gripped harder and pulled on Orlando's arm, dragging his way towards the exit.

"Fuck, let me go." Anger was really showing through Orlando's face, but Viggo just kept on pulling him towards the exit. Even though he was a full grown man Viggo was strongly overpowering him. Maybe his subconscious was letting him. Maybe it was someone else.

Viggo pulled the swearing, staggering drunk Orlando out from the club. He was glad to be out of the noise and the mass of people. He was glad Orlando was too.

"Where are your keys?" Viggo asked.

"What about your car?" Orlando shot back. He seemed a mix of emotions, and it hurt Viggo to see his friend like this.

"I took a cab. Give me your keys. I'm driving." Orlando dug into his blue jeans and pulled out the car keys. He held them in his hand and looked at the key ring. It was a tiny surfboard that said 'Hang Ten'.

"Dom gave me this." Orlando whispered. Viggo just stared. Pain showing in his face. He started walking to the parking lot to the black BMW was parked. Viggo followed behind.

Unlocking the car Orlando made his way into the drivers seat, but Viggo caught him before he sat down.

"I'm driving. Remember?"

"Fuck you, Vig. I'm fine." He went to sit down again but Viggo pulled him up with a swift jerk. Orlando didn't know what had happened, and he was too drunk to realize. He stumbled and fell onto the pavement.

"Shit!" Viggo said. He bent down to help his friend up. "Sorry, Orli, I didn't mean to."

"'S all right, Vig." Orlando said in a moan. He winced as Viggo pulled him up. He touched his fingers to his forehead. "Fuck." He looked back on them and saw the dark red liquid on his fingertips.

The cut bled down the side of his face.

"Fuck. Here just a sec." Viggo reached around his pockets for some tissue or something to hold to the cut. Nothing.

"Don't worry about it, mate." Orlando said in a low voice. "I got stuff at home."

He let Viggo put him in the passenger seat of the car. He put his head back on the cool leather seats, and shut his eyes. He could feel the car sink a bit as Viggo sat in the drivers seat. The engine started and the car pulled forward.

Viggo drove on the highway towards Orlando's home in LA. 'Funny.' He though. 'Just Orli now.' He gave a small sad sigh and looked over to the figure beside him. The curls of Orlando's hair fell on his forehead, and the sweat pulled them down. All Viggo could think of was running his fingers through them and brushing them off the beautiful angels face. But it couldn't be. Not now.

"Mmmm, Vig." A small British whisper said.

"Mmmm?" Viggo glanced over at him. A small scowl was on Orlando's brow.

"Stop the car. I think... I think..." But Viggo already knew. He pulled over quickly and Orlando unlocked the door. Viggo got out and heard Orlando being sick on the other side.

After he had finished he walked over to the other side and looked at the slouching figure.

"God, knows what pain you are in." Viggo whispered. Orlando didn't hear him. "Are you ok?"

Orlando looked up and gave a weak smile. He looked horrid, and for someone that good looking it took a lot to make him look bad. The small streak of blood down the side of his face and sweat on him showed up more on his pale face. "I'll be ok, now."

"You sure?" He asked concerned.

"Yeah, Vig. Just take me home please."

"Ok."

Orlando shifted back into the car and Viggo got back into drive.

*****
Viggo unlocked the door to the house that had once belonged to both Orlando and Dominic. As he walked in he felt a strange emptiness and sadness in the air. Orlando just swaggered in the doorway, looking around. He just gave a small smile toward Viggo. Tears pricked into his eyes, feeling like tiny pins. He blinked to keep them back.

Viggo hung up his coat on the rack and looked at his friend. He looked away. Slightly embarrassed that he looked as if he would cry, Orlando quickly turned away.

"Lets go get that cut cleaned up." Viggo said. Orlando just nodded and then proceeded up the stairs. He got up to his bedroom and went immediately in. Kicking off his tennis shoes he made his way to the bathroom just off to the side of the room. Viggo stood in the doorway and stared.

Nothing was touched. All of Dominic's things were left as they were. Some of his clothes were draped over the chair, the cologne on the dresser, the shoes on the floor, his watch on the night table, the half used bottle of lube, his scent.

This time tears pricked into Viggo's eyes. He stood transfixed on the sight. The memories of his friend. Suddenly as if brought out of a trance he made his way to the bathroom. He found Orlando just staring at himself in the mirror.

"God, I probably look like something out of a zombie movie." Looked at Viggo a small real smile was on his lips. Viggo gave a small chuckle.

"No, you look worse."

"Cunt." Orli said laughing and turning away. Viggo walked over and put the toilet seat down and made Orli sit. Walking over to the sink he grabbed a washcloth and ran it under some warm water. He could feel Orlando watch his every move.

"Now," he said, ringing out the cloth, "lets get that cut cleaned up, mmmm?"

"Yeah." he said in a whisper. Viggo knelt in front of him. He wouldn't meet his eyes. Slowly he wiped the cloth over Orlando's forehead. Pushing the dark curls back he wiped the blood off the side of his forehead and cheek. The dark chocolate eyes met the blue ones. Just a sad longing was in them.

The cut wasn't that bad. But the head always bled more, so it looked worse then it did. Viggo finished wiping the blood and sweat away. Orlando's pale face looked into the mirror. He looked the same. Just paler and thinner. Viggo had wondered how much Orlando has eaten this past month.

ookeooked into the medicine cabinet and found what he was looking for, some hydrogen peroxide. He took out the bottle and found a clean q-tip on the counter. He went back to Orlando and knelt before him. Dipping the q-tip in the medicine he gently put it up to the small cut. Orlando looked into the blue eyes taking care of him.

Viggo finished and looked back. Tears sparkled in Orlando's eyes. He was held transfixed by his beauty, sorrow, hurt, and pain. Not saying a word the two men just stared at each other. Suddenly a small voice cut the silence.

"He was my Hobbit." A tear slid down Orlando's angel face.

"I know." Viggo whispered back, and he pushed back a curl that fallen back over his forehead.

"I was his Elf." Another tear.

"I know."

"Have you said goodbye?" Viggo asked after a moments pause.

"I don't know. I don't know if I can."

Silence again. Heartache. Nothing could be worse. As if something pulled Viggo up he grabbed a tissue, and went back down to Orlando. He wiped away the tears.

Orlando just stared. Hooked onto Viggo. The man that was taking care of him right now. The passion and depth of this man must be incredible, Orlando thought as he watched him. He sniffed and blinked away another tear, then leant forward.

He pressed his lips to Viggo's. The warm inviting lips of Viggo. He pressed in harder, but nothing met Orlando on the other side. He pushed away and then looked at Viggo ashamed.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

"It's ok. You know-"

"I know." Orlando said in sort of a final tone. Viggo wrapped his arms around Orlando and hugged him close. He felt him melt into his body. His head buried into his shoulder, soft curls touched his cheek. He heard a muffled sob. They stayed like that for a while when finally Orlando broke the embrace.

"You should get some sleep." Viggo said, looking at him.

"Yeah." Orlando agreed. His tear stained face looked back. Viggo pulled him up and they left the bathroom.

In the bedroom Viggo turned on a lamp beside the bed and took off his shoes. Orlando just stood there in the middle, as if paralyzed.

Viggo walked over and untuked his shirt from his jeans. Orlando let Viggo do this to him. He slid off the shirt and moved toward the front. He unbuttoned the waistband of his jeans and the zipper. He then slipped them off his hips and down his legs. Orlando kicked them off and stood in front of Viggo in his white boxers, that were low on his hips.

Viggo took an arm around him and then led him towards the unkept bed. He lay Orlando down.

"Thank you." Orlando whispered.

"Not a problem. Can I get you anything?"

"No, thanks, Vig."

"Ok." He turned to go out the door.

"Wait." Orlando said. "Can you turn on the radio on and..."

"Ok." Viggo walked over to the stereo and turned on the radio. J Lo and Ja Rule was playing.

"Want me to change-"

"No, thanks."

"And?" Viggo asked.

"And, stay with me." Orlandaileailed off.

"Sure." Viggo smiled and then walked over and lay in the bed beside Orlando. He could smell Dominic. He scent filled his nostrils and his mind. Memories flooded hif thf the good times... And of the call he got that had broken his heart. A tear slipped out of his eye. He looked at Orlando. His eyes were closed but he was humming softly to the music. But it wasn't the same song that was playing on the radio.

He didn't pay attention, until a hand grabbed his and fingers laced through his. Orlando shifted onto his side and moved into Viggo. He pulled Viggo's hand and arm around him. "Just hold me, like Dom used to." Orlando said hoarsely. Tears streamed down his cheeks.

"Yeah." Viggo pulled him closer to him and hugged him against his chest. He felt Orli's silk smooth skin underneath his hands. It set his mind on fire. He though how lucky Dominic was to have held Orli like this night after night.

"Why didn't I pick him up?" Orlando said to himself, but Viggo thought it was directed to him.

"I don't know." Viggo said softly into his ear. "Who knows what God's plan is."

"If I had picked him up then that drunk driver..." He sobbed softly and his body shook under Viggo's embrace.

"Shhhh." Viggo said softly into his ear. He hugged him closed, and waited until Orlando had calmed down a bit. His put a soft kiss onto his shoulder. A shiver ran through Orlando's e. He. His hand squeezed harder in Viggo's.

Something took over, and Viggo planted soft kisses onto Orlando's shoulder and the back of his neck. Orlando sighed and his whole body relaxed into the kisses. Before he knew his hand was guiding Viggo's down to his groin and his growing cock.

Slipping Viggo's hand under his boxers Orlando made him cup and stroke his erection. Viggo continued to kiss softly on his neck. Up and down slowly, Viggo went. But then he remembered the half used bottle of lube on the night table.

He grabbed it and slipped his hand out, put some of the lube on his and went back to stoke Orlando. Slowly at first, but then faster. Orlando moaned and whimpered under him. Faster he stoked. Up and down. His own erection pressed into Orlando's back.

Suddenly Orlando threw back his head into Viggo's shoulder, with a hoarse shuddering cry he came. "Oh god, Dominic."

Then the full weight of it hit Viggo. This wasn't right. It wasn't good for him. He had taken advantage of him. He just stared at the wall. Orlando guided his hand off of him. He had no idea what had just happened. His mind spun.

"Oh god, Vig." He didn't move.

"No, Orli." Viggo whispered. "I shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that. I shouldn't have let you." He gave an apologetic kiss on Orli's shoulder.

"But Dom..." Orli whispered again. He couldn't even think of it.

"Don't. Just go to sleep. Forget about it." Viggo cooed into his ear. He rocked him while Orlando just sniffed back his tears. The radio was playing some Elton John at the moment.

A few minutes later the two let the previous act go. It was like it had never happened. Viggo held Orli as he lay there, trying to get some sleep. The radio switched to another song. This time it was Celine Dion and R. Kelly. The music and lyrics floated in the room and touched Orlando's ears.

"I'll be your cloud up in the sky,
I'll be your shoulder when you cry,
I'll hear your voices when you call me,
I am your angel
And when all hope is gone, I'm here
No matter how far you are, I'm near,
It makes no difference who you are,
I am your angel,
I'm your angel..."

A jolt of sorrow and pain wracked his body. His face screwed up in pain and he turned his face into the pillow and sobbed violently. Viggo just held him, shushing in his ear lovingly.

All that was Dominic invaded Orlando's mind. His touch, kiss, voice, laugh, his face, his soul. He could hardly take it. He remember the first time he heard that song. It was the first time he and Dominic made love together. They both didn't really like Celine Dion but it just happened to be the song that was playing when it happened.

"I love you, Orli." Dominic's voice echoed into his mind. He cried harder. Letting everything go. Viggo just silently held him. His own tears and pain coming through. He rocked and cooed into Orli's ear until finally he fell asleep.

*****
A soft kiss on his lips, woke Orlando up. White light filled the his bedroom. He blinked. He felt strong familiar hands cradle and hug him. He blinked and looked up.

Dominic stared back at him. He smiled and kissed his confused lover again.

"Hi." He said cheerfully.

"Hi." Orlando choked out. He couldn't believe what was happening. All he did was stare into the blue grey eyes that looked into his. Tears again flowed down his cheeks.

"Hey, don't be a cry baby." He said laughing.

"But Dom, your... Your..."

"Dead?" He said, but no sorrow was in his voice.

"Yeah." Orlando sniffed. He shifted up and rested his head on Dominic's bare shoulder. He wiped away a few more tears.

"Look Orlando," Dom said. But Orlando broke in.

"God, Dom, I am so sorry. I should've... God I miss you."

"I know." Dominic said softly. "I've been watching."

"You have? Then Viggo and-"

"Yeah. But I don't mind. Hell, you need some cheering up." He laughed and then kissed the curls of Orlando's head.

"Orlando I need to tell you not to feel bad. Things happen for a reason. I can't bear to see you wrapped up all this sorrow, guilt and pain. It breaks my heart. I want to see you happy. I don't want to see this eat your soul for the rest of your life." He hugged him closer. "Let me go. Let someone else love you. Viggo does. I personally think you are the perfect match. Always have." He laughed.

Orlando choked out a laugh too. But then he went quiet.

"Orlando?"

"How can I?" He said quietly.

"Just say goodbye. Keep me in your heart. Whenever you need me I will be right there." Dominic smiled softly and kissed him again. Orlando whimpered and started to cry again.

"Hey! C'mon!" Dominic said "I'm happy! I'm in no pain. I'm fine. What I want is for you to be fine."

Tilting up Orlando's chin he captured his lips and took him into a soul searching, loving kiss. When it ended, he looked onto Orlando's tear stained face.

"I'm fine. You will be fine. You are stronger than you know. Say goodbye. Remember I am your Angel."

They kissed again. The most passionate and loving kiss that they had ever shared before. When it ended Orlando knew that was it.

"I love you, Orlando." Dominic said softly. Then everything went white.

*****
Orlando woke up. Soft daylight came into the room. He blinked and looked around sleepily, coming out of the dream. He suddenly remembered what had happened. He whipped around and saw that it was Viggo who slept beside him. He heart froze. No Dominic.

He sat silently, for how long he didn't know. He watched Viggo breath in and out. The birds outside chirped and the radio still played. A song by Areosmith was playing.

A calm came over him. It seemed if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and being.

Orlando breathed in deeply and smiled. He gripped Viggo's hand as if to use it for comfort.

"Goodbye, Dominic. I love you." He whispered.


end