Come to me in dreams

Chapter 9.

Mixed feelings dwelled inside Lindir when Imladris finally disappeared from horizon. He loved his mate with all his heart, but Imladris had been his home as long as he could remember. Lindir’s parting from Elrond had also been bittersweet; when the Elf- Lord had hugged him, and told him that he was always welcome back.

Lindir’s melancholy eased when they finally stopped for the night. It was still quite warm, so they didn’t need any shelter, but made love and then cuddled in each other’s arms under the stars.

“I’m so happy that you are with me, Lindir nín. I know that we have to face many obstacles, but nothing seems too hard as long as I have you.” Thranduil said, holding sated Lindir in his arms.

“I will always be with you, meleth (love). I admit that I miss Imladris and Elrond, but my home is now with you.” Lindir whispered, wondering how his life would turn out in Mirkwood. He couldn’t deny that he was a little worried about all that Thranduil had told him, but at the same time Lindir was grateful that his mate had been completely honest with him. Lindir didn’t want to walk into something nasty because he had not been aware of the state of affairs.

“I want you to understand that you will always be the only one in my heart, Lindir. As long as we keep this as secret, you will hear all kind of rumors and whispering about my intended marriage.”

“I know, but I can take anything as long as I know that you love me. I will do anything for you, meleth. I am just so sorry that I cannot give you an heir.” Lindir whispered sadly. How he hoped that he could fulfill this necessity. He had sent silent but intense prayers to the Valar that his beloved hervenn (husband) would have an heir worthy of the high position.

“Don’t be sorry for that, Lindir nín. You are everything to me. I could never find a better mate than you, even if I were to seek one for millennia.” Thranduil said, gently kissing Lindir upon the cheek. He sensed his mate’s melancholy and tried to soothe it.

“I would do anything for you… anything! I never imagined that it was possible to love someone this much, and I hope that someday we can love each other openly.”

“I swear we will. I have to find the solution to this problem, but I admit that I was earlier too sad and tired to do so. But now, with you beside me, I have every reason to live and fight for our love.”

“Hold me, meleth nín. I feel so safe in your arms.” Lindir mumbled, almost in sleep.

“I will hold you, meleth… for the rest of my days, and I will never let you go.”

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Lindir hated her at the very first sight.

His heart ached when the beautiful, raven-haired elleth flew into Thranduil’s arms, regardless of Thranduil’s obvious coldness. Lindir’s mood didn’t lift even when Thranduil pushed her away as soon as he possibly could.

“I’m so glad to see you well, my king.” The elleth purred, with a sensual voice that made Lindir’s stomach feel nauseous.

“And I’m glad to be back. Where is Sadron? I want to see him as soon as possible.” Thranduil said sharply, wondering where his valet was. Sardon was usually the first to welcome him back, and his absence was something unprecedented. When Thranduil took a closer look, there were very few of his people present. What in Arda was going on?

“I hoped that you wanted to spend your first evening with your family, my king. Don’t you have enough time to work tomorrow?”

Thranduil narrowed his eyes. Something was in amiss, but what?

“You know full well that Sadron’s place is beside me. I want to see him. Now!” He commanded. Whatever Vanmoriel (dark beauty) had planned; he would stop it now. Thranduil sensed Lindir’s distress, and he didn’t want his mate suffer more than it was necessary. He had to get rid of the troublesome elleth as soon as possible.

“Very well, my king. If you really want to get yourself as exhausted as you were earlier, you are free to do so. I was only worried.” Vanmoriel snapped, obviously disappointed.

“Whatever I am, it is not your worry, Vanmoriel. Go now and send Sadron to me.” Thranduil said, and dismissed her.

The elleth left but not before, she had thrown a gaze that flowed with wrath and jealousy towards Lindir. Still she didn’t ask anything about him. Lindir couldn’t help to feel sick when he saw such hatred…and he was the object of it.

When they finally were alone Thranduil glanced at Lindir, worried. He too had seen Vanmoriel’s jealousy.

“Are you all right, meleth?” Thranduil asked softly, but didn’t dare to come closer even if his whole being ached with need to take his mate in his arms.

“I… I think so…but I admit that I didn’t anticipate such a reaction. She hates me. No one has ever done so.” Lindir whispered, devastated.

“Just be careful, and try to stay away from her. The situation might be easier after I introduce you officially, and tell my people why you are here. But we cannot continue this way for very long. I will find the solution no matter how hard it may be.”

“I’ll do as you say. Do you think that I could go to my rooms now? I’m quite tired.” Lindir said, closing his eyes. This would be harder that he had imagined.

“I’ll arrange that as soon as possible and remember that everyone here is not like her. She has her supporters, but so do I, and soon you’ll meet the one who is my most trusted friend and confidant.” Thranduil had hardly said that, when he heard a voice behind him.

“My king, is that really you?” Sadron asked, delighted to see Thranduil looking so good. The king had been worn and weak when he left for Imladris, but now he was back to his old self.

“As you can see, meldir, I found the cure to my ailment.” Thranduil said, smiling.

“I see that you have brought someone with you. May I inquire who he is?”

“Of course, here is Lindir O Imladris, my new minstrel that I invited to come in my service. He has such wonderful talents like I never have heard before.” Thranduil said, carefully but obvious warmth in his voice that he couldn’t hide.

“Welcome to Mirkwood, Master Lindir. You are warmly welcomed.” Sadron smiled at Lindir. He sensed that there was something more between his king and this Lindir but chose not to ask about it. He knew about King Thranduil’s and Lady Vanmoriel’s complicated relationship. As long as Lady Vanmoriel pursued the king, that cursed elleth would make Lindir’s life miserable if she suspected something. It was better to be silent for now. Sadron knew that if Lady Vanmoriel were to become the queen someday, he would have no other options but leave Mirkwood. The lady hated him bitterly because of his close relationship to the king. Sadron wondered silently how the lady’s only ion (son) had to suffer his nana’s (mom’s) unjustified jealousy. Silently, Sadron hoped that his king would find someone as sweet as this Lindir. Unfortunately, he was a male, but Sadron couldn’t remember when he had seen anyone as beautiful and warm as the minstrel.

“Sadron, I want you to personally take care of Lindir and see to it that he has everything that he needs to feel welcomed. Our journey was quite hard for him and he needs rest. Take him to the Forest-room.” Thranduil requested, worrying at Lindir’s silence. He himself decided to retire as soon as possible. His mate needed him now, and Thranduil’s heart ached even more because he knew he couldn’t do anything about it.

Sadron made haste to fulfill his king’s request and didn’t ask why Thranduil wanted to give the best guest-room to Lindir, even if it was unprecedented. He saw that the young minstrel was, despite his smile, quite melancholy.

Lindir didn’t look back when Sadron escorted him away from Thranduil. He was sure that his façade would crash down if he saw his mate. Lindir wanted nothing more than to have Thranduil with him, to hold him close, but that wasn’t possible and the mere thought hurt Lindir deeply.

“Are you all right, Master Lindir?” Sadron asked, worried when they finally had reached Lindir’s new rooms.

“I’m fine, thank you. Just quite tired, I must say.” Lindir said wearily.

“What if I bring your meal to your rooms this evening? You seem too tired to attend the dinner tonight.”

Lindir managed a smile. “That would be heavenly! Thank you, Sadron.”

“You’re welcome, and I hope that soon you will feel more welcomed here. It was really an unfortunate incident that you met the most unkind person in Mirkwood first. I can assure that all of us are not like her.”

“I must admit that I was quite shocked at her reaction. She seems to hate me, even if we just met. What in Arda I have done to deserve that kind of treatment?” Lindir wondered. He liked Sadron, and Thranduil had told him that this elf was faithful.

“You haven’t done anything wrong. Lady Vanmoriel hates everyone who seems to be too close to the king. You traveled with him, alone, and she is jealous, so be careful and stay away from her. Remember that whatever you need, you can always come to me, and the king would surely help too, if necessary.” Sadron explained, carefully studying the young elf. He really liked Lindir and decided to support him in every way he could.

“You don’t know what that means to me. Thank you, Sadron.” Lindir smiled.

“I leave you now so you can rest. But I’ll come back at dinnertime to bring your meal.” Sadron said as he left.

For a moment, Lindir could only stare at the closed door, but finally he turned and walked slowly to the bed. The pain inside him was too great for him to even cry.

For a first time he thought that what if he had made a huge mistake, by coming here.