melme Colle (or: hidden love)

Chapter eight I’ll take your place

Thranduil had ordered his men to go ahead and inform the others. Elrond should prepare for a healing. He now cursed himself for not bringing more horses. Now they had to carry the litter themselves. He sighed.
Placing Erestor on the one horse they had was out of the question, for it would only result in more blood loss and he had lost so much already.

He looked at the others, seeing his own worry and concern mirrored in their eyes. Elladan and Elrohir carried the litter while Aragorn kept a close watch on Erestor’s pulse and temperature. Glorfindel looked grim, feeling guilty.

Thranduil looked up, realising the light was growing less. They wouldn’t make it back before nightfall.

He halted. “We have to make camp and start a fire.”
Aragorn nodded. “Aye. He needs the heat. Moving might harm him more than stopping the night.” The twins carefully lowered their charge and smiled sadly at each other.

Thranduil sighed, knowing he had to remain in control. It looked like the others weren’t coherent at all. “Aragorn, search for healing herbs. Elladan and Elrohir, get a fire going and then aid Aragorn. We also need water and food, so some of us will have to hunt.”
He smiled at Legolas. “You stay, your ankles still need mending.”
He closed his eyes, just remembering Erestor might need herbs that didn’t grow now. “Glorfindel, mount the horse and go to Elrond. Bring back the herbs and the healer. Now go.”

Glorfindel was extremely pleased he had something to do. Casting one last look at his friend he mounted and flew away.

Gimli snuffed. “And who will hunt?”
Thranduil smiled and sat down. “I will and once the twins and Aragorn return they can aid me. I am not a good hunter, so I will need it.”

Gimli grinned and attended to the fire, making it warmer without making it higher.
Thranduil cocked his head. “How do you do that?”
Gimli shrugged. “Don’t know. How do you know how to climb?”
Thranduil understood. “You just do.” He smiled. “I shall see it as a Dwarven skill then. Take care of them Gimli.”

Gimli nodded and poked the fire some more before turning his attention to Legolas. “What is wrong, laddy?”
Legolas’ eyes were filled with tears and he cradled Erestor to his chest. He now looked at Gimli and the Dwarf gasped at the empty expression. He scooted closer instantly. “Laddy?”
Legolas looked down again. “I love him, Gimli. I know he never loved me and never will, but I don’t want to lose him.”
Gimli placed his hand on the elf’s shoulder, not knowing wha say say. “Let’s hope your Valar will stand by him.” He signalled for Legolas to settle next to him.
The wounded elf needed to lay down, so Legolas had to do so too, if he wanted to hold him. He shook his head as Legolas didn’t utter any protests but simply laid down.

He rested his head on Erestor’s shoulder and sighed. He wanted to remain awake but exhaustion caught him and he fell asleep, his arm wrapped around Erestor’s waist.

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Aragorn and the twins returned and smiled at the way Legolas slept. They silently walked closer and greeted Gimli.

“Where are Thranduil and Glorfindel?”
Gimli cocked his head and poked the fire some more, stunning the twins as well. “Glorfindel went to get Lord Elrond here and the King asked you to join him in his hunt for food.”
The twins stifled their laugh, unwilling to wake up their sleeping friend. “Aye, he is a poor hunter. Let’s go then.”
Aragorn shook his head. “I have to make this first.” He sat down before the fire and started working on the herbs.

He looked at Gimli. “I am glad you are here, Gimli. Your knowledge of heat is needed.”
Gimli nodded and spurred the fire to blaze even more. He could see Aragorn sweat profoundly and even the twins had huffed at the heat it produced, but it was good for the wounded elf. He wondered why the elves felt the heat at all. Was it really that hot? “Aragorn? Is the fire too hot? I do not think so but then again…”
Aragorn shook his head. “Nay, it cannot be too hot, Gimli. Erestor needs it and I think Legolas does too. Please don’t turn it down.”
He stood and blew some air in his face, making Gimli grin. “Go after them, Aragorn. I’ll look after them. Does he need to drink it?”
Aragorn nodded. “Aye. And the other one needs to cool and harden. Hopefully it will stimulate the making of blood and closing the wound.”
Gimli nodded and waved him away.

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Celeborn jumped up when he heard a horse approaching fast. His eyes scanned the trees and he sighed, seeing only Glorfindel return, without a body in front of him. He ran towards him. “Man nás?”
Glorfindel jumped off and panted. “Elrond, we need Elrond. Erestor is gravely injured. Herbs to stimulate blood production and to close the wound and…”
Celeborn nodded and turned round, leading the warrior to the healing rooms, where Elrond was already preparing. He couldn’lp blp but grin when he saw reality was more Elrond fidgeting and Thranduil’s healers preparing everything, working around the troubled lord.

He cleared his throat. “Elrond. Your skills are needed.”
Elrond’s eyes regained their normal focus and he ran towards the blond, grabbing his tunic in fear. Glorfindel lowered his eyes, his guilt coming at him again. Elrond saw and narrowed his eyes. “Glorfindel?”
The blond swallowed. “He was too swift. I didn’t even see him do it.” Before his eyes the minutes had come back.
Elrond shook him to get him back. “Glorfindel, is anyone injured?”
Glorfindel blinked and steadied himself, nodding. “Aye, Erestor. He took an orc-blade meant for Legolas.”
Celeborn gasped. /If Erestor hadn’t Elrond’s vision would have become true./ He sighed. “Elrond, get the herbs you need. Glorfindel will take you there, we will prepare here and I’ll arrange for two horses immediately.”

Back in the courtyard he found the mount that had brought Glorfindel here, fighting the stable grooms. He grinned and approached. Respect made the others step back instantly. He smiled and touched the horse. “You are weary, my friend, and deserve a rest and food.”
The horse shook its head and threw it backwards; the nostrils wide and ears flat.
Celeborn frowned and cocked his head. “Is he always this reluctant?”
One of the grooms shook hisd. “d. “Nay, my lord. She’s the kindest horse we have. Which is why the counsellor rode her.”
Celeborn lowered his head at her, to show his apology for calling her male and smiled, petting her nose. “You’re worried about him.” The horse nodded and Celeborn smiled again. “What’s your name?”
The groom grinned and answered. “Yulë annava.” He smiled fondly. “She was born in Yulë.”
Celeborn nodded and looked at him. “Prepare two swift horses.” The grooms flew away to do his bidding and Celeborn continued rubbing the nose. “And you will go with them, maybe you can hthemthem, but please do not strain yourself.”
The horse whinnied, happy the elf understood.

Glorfindel and Elrond ran towards them and the blond looked angry. “Why hasn’t the horse been tended to?”
Celeborn grinned. “Because she doesn’t want them to. Yulë annava here is anxious to return to Erestor. It seems he’s stolen her affections.”
Elrond grinned when the horse whinnied and seemed to nod. At any rate, she did seem very eager to leave again. He shrugged and mounted the horse led to him. “We move. Glorfindel, lead the way.”
But the mare shook her head and took the lead instead, guiding them even swifter than Glorfindel could have done.

Celeborn watched them go and smiled. /I hope Erestor survives./
He smiled when he saw Arwen approach. “Arwen, remind me to ask Thranduil to gift that horse to Erestor, should he survive.”
Arwen nodded and her eyes were filled with determination. “He will. He must.” She now realised he had been a beacon to her entire family. She strangled a sob and leaned gratefully against her grandfather.

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Legolas blinked when he heard someone pass him by. He sat up and looked around dazed.

Gimli smiled. “Awake?” He stood and brought over the cooled down salve and potion. “Here, Aragorn said this goes on his chest and he needs to drink this.”
Legolas nodded and helped Gimli apply the salve and making Erestor drink the liquid. “I hope it works.”
Gimli nodded. “We all do. But Glorfindel is getting the healer here. Have hope.” He returned to fire and made it blaze again.

Legolas wiped away some wayward strands and kissed Erestor’s brow. “Saes, ú fir. Im boe le.”

He laid down again but flared back up, shocked. Nay, this couldn’t be. His breathing sped up as he lowered his head on Erestor’s chest and he flared up again. “Erestor, nay, ellë váfir.”
He gasped in fear and shock, realising Erestor was cold, no matter the heat Gimli’s fire produced and his heartbeat slowing down. /Erestor, no. You cannot die. You cannot. Mandos cannot have you./

He didn’t notice Aragorn and Gimli standing beside him. They had felt the cold too and recognized it. Aragorn knew it had to be Mandos’ cold, and he now knew Legolas had died that day.
Gimli’s look was knowing too. Legolas had felt just as cold and had died and now Erestor was dying. But maybe he would magically survive as well. He hoped so and clung to it.

He pulled Aragorn away. “There’s nothing we can do, right?”
Aragorn nodded, hating to admit it.
Gimli smiled sadly. “Then let us stay at bay. He loves him.”
Aragorn’s eyes widened and he looked at the horrid scene in shock. /Legolas…/ He nodded and sat down. “We will leave them alone. And prepare to support him.” He prayed they wouldn’t lose him to grief.

Legolas now cried in earnest, feeling the body turn colder and colder, hearing the heartbeat slow down and seeing the breathing become slower. “Nay, don’t take him.” He rocked Erestor in his arms. /If only I could die in your stead./
He gasped in shock and horror when Mandos himself materialised before him. He clung to Erestor and tightened the embrace protectively and possessively. He glared at the Vala. “You cannot have him. I won’t let you.”

Aragorn shook his head when he heard Legolas address open air. /Why do they always try to challenge Mandos that way?/
Gimli too heard the words, but his eyes narrowed, making out a silhouette standing close to the two elves. He knew it was the fire’s heat that allowed him to see it. /Can it be?/ He forced every sense on the scene, wishing to know what was going on.

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Mandos smiled. “I do not decide who dies when, Legolas.” The prince’s glare didn’t lessen, but intensified instead. He nodded. Lorien’s plan had worked, was going to work. He cocked his head and studied Legolas. /Things would have gone differently had Erestor told you, but he didn’t. Does he not know we wouldn’t have granted this if you two aren’t compatible?/ No matter how old he was or how long he’s watched Erestor, that was one elf that continued to puzzle him.

Legolas growled and pulled Erestor closer, whispering soothing words and endearments.

Mandos took one step closer but stopped when the blond growled at him. “I heard your words, Legolas. Did you mean them?”
Legolas briefly wondered what he meant, but then realised what Mandos was offering. He didn’t hesitate. “Aye. I meant it. Take me instead of him.”
Mandos cocked his head. “Why? Blocking the blow was his own free choice, there’s no need for survivor’s guilt.”
Legolas’ glare intensified and defiance shone strong from within him. “I love him and I would take his place any time. And he needs to survive. He is living for two.” He snorted. “But you know that. He challenged you to bring back a dead elf.”
Mandos nodded. “Aye. And now you are prepared to die for them?”
Legolas shook his head. “Nay, I die for Erestor. The second life is a bonus, I do this for Erestor solely. Take me.”

Mandos approached and kneeled down, touching Erestor’s forehead. The elf’s breathing and beating sped up a little. “Even if I would agree to this, there is no guarantee, young Prince. Your love might still die and your sacrifice in vain.”
Legolas stubbornly shook his head. “He is strong and will survive if you stop calling to him.”
Mandos smiled ruefully. “I never call anyone to my halls, Legolas. They are free to go in or back.”

He sighed. Legolas was stubborn. /Just what Erestor needs./ “If I accept your offer all it does is buy him a little time, not survival itself.”
Legolas shook his head. “Nay, it buys him the time they need to bring him home and heal him. He will survive. He will. Take me in his place, I beseech you.”

Mandos cocked his head and placed his hand on Legolas’ shoulder. “If we do this you cannot dwell amongst the other souls. You will spend your waiting in solitude. Please think carefully.”
Legolas’ gaze hardened. “It will be worth it, knowing Erestor alive.”

Mandos remained silent but then nodded. “A bargain.”

Legolas smiled and looked at Erestor. He felt Mandos’ hand on his chest and the cold seeped into his body and soul. He gently lowered Erestor on the litter again and kissed his forehead. “Melin lle. Eä, Erestor, ëa.” He didn’t look away, wanting Erestor to be the last image he saw.

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“Legolas!”
Aragorn screamed and jumped up, running to catch his falling friend. He gasped as he felt the cold. He shook him and frantically searched for life-signs. He sighed relieved when he felt a steady, yet weak pulse. “Just another swaying.”
Gimli shook his head. “Nay.” It startled Aragorn, he hadn’t expected it that close by.

Gimli looked at the two elves. “Didn’t you see? Or hear? That Mandos-person was here, talking to laddy. He took his place.”
Aragorn shook his head. “I heard Legolas speak as well, Gimli, but I’ve heard it many times. They all beseech Mandos to take them instead of their loved ones.”
Gimli shook his head but didn’t speak again, kng Arg Aragorn wouldn’t believe him. And truth was that Legolas did have a pulse. But the eyes were even emptier than before.

The twins and Thranduil ran towards them, thinking they were under another attack, but instantly realised it was worse. Thranduil’s sword fell to the ground as he stared at his son’s lifeless body, limp in Aragorn’s hold. He went to his knees, his eyes filled with tears and fear. He heard the horses come but paid them no heed.

Glorfindel and Elrdismdismounted, shocked at the scene that greeted them. That was not what they had feared to find. Elrond looked at the blond but Glorfindel shook his head. Legolas had been fine when he had left.

Elrond kneeled, examining Erestor first. He sighed, realising the elf would life if they moved him soon. He grabbed his pouch and applied more herbs before bandaging the wound. “Glorfindel, you take him.” He looked at Aragorn and the twins in pride, they had done well.

He now turned his attention to Legolas. “What happened?”
Aragorn shrugged. “I know not, ata. He just collapsed.” He threw Gimli a warning look, but the Dwarf knew better than to address it now.
Elrond frowned. “His life-signs are very weak. Let’s get him to his room.” Thranduil nodded and lifted his son, cradling him to his chest.

Glorfindel was facing a dilemma. Like Elrond, he wanted Erestor safe as soon as possible, and now that the wound was bound he could be taken on e, be, but the mount he had been given was extremely edgy and jumpy. A ride like that wouldn’t do Erestor much good. Nor Legolas.

Elladan saw and correctly interpreted his look and smiled. “Ata, me thinks you have to take Glorfindel’s horse so Thranduil can take Legolas on yours.” His eyes were warm at seeing the affection the mare displayed towards Erestor. “And Glorfindel can ride her.”
But Thranduil shook his head. “Nay, she’s tired and won’t run as fast as these two. You and Glorfindel take them, Elrond, and Erestor and Legolas. We will follow on foot and guide her.”
But the mare shook her head and moved protectively and demandingly before Glorfindel, who was holding Erestor. Her point was clear.
Elladan laughed. “It doesn’t look like she wants another to carry him.”

Elrond and Glorfindel exchanged a look and nodded. Glorfindel would ride her, with Erestor. A slow steady ride was to preferred to a fast and bumpy one.

Aragorn too made a decision. Thranduil was in no way to control a horse right now and he didn’t want to add another patient to the list. He jumped on the horse Glorfindel previously rode and pulled the king in front of him. He looked at Gimli and the twins. “You will have to walk.”
Gimli grinned. “We’ll see you there.” The three of them took off, which prompted the others to move as well.

Thranduil was stunned at being on a horse so suddenly, but he felt grateful for Aragorn’s understanding. His bemusement grew when he saw Yulë take off. He’s never seen her ride that swiftly before.

Translations
Yulë annava : means : the gift of Yule
Saes, ú fir. Im boe le. : Means : Please don’t die. I need you.
ellë váfir : means : -you- cannot die
Melin lle. Eä, Erestor, ëa : means : I love you. Life, Erestor, life.

TBC

also beta-ed by Bettina