The old ways

"You are afraid, herven nín. Why?" Haldir let his forehead rest against Legolas’ lower body. He released one of his hands and put it against the slightly rounded belly before him.

"This is what you fear isn't it?" Haldir whispered gently.

Tears were running down Legolas’ face, as Haldir slowly opened the tunic young elf was wearing. Pushing the long silver shirt out of the way, Haldir unfastened the lacing of the leggings, to find the armour Gimli had made underneath.

Haldir trailed the silver inlays with his fingertips. So much care, so much love. Given willingly by a dwarf.

Haldir reached for the leather straps and undid them. And then at last it lay before him. The pale, tender skin of Legolas body, stretched by the growing child inside. So he had been right. Legolas had indeed become pregnant during their time in Lothlorien. They biggest wish was fulfilled. It was sad that it had happened at a time like his. A time of war....

Suddenly Haldir understood. It were his words that had made Legolas tremble with fear instead of coming to his arms. His words that now put a barrier between them.

Haldir’s fingers stroked the swollen body of his lover tenderly, tracing along the new contours, feeling the hardness beneath. He brushed his lips over the skin, taking in the warmth, the life and new emotions.

"I love you, Legolas. And you are the only person that I would trust the life of our child with. Even to carry it safe and sound through this war. Gods, I need you so much." Haldir pressed his face against Legolas body.

Legolas sobbed at the words from Haldir and moved his arms around his husbands shoulders holding him.

After some minutes the prince had composed himself again, and he placed his hands on Haldir’s shoulders. "Come, let me help you to the bed."

Haldir nodded and got up from the ground with difficulty. Leaning on Legolas he moved over to the bed, sinking onto its soft mattress with a sigh, never letting completely go off Legolas.

For the first time in many weeks full of grief, worry and emotional turmoil, the two lovers were holding each other close. Relishing the feel of the other, the soft words were with tender caresses of their hands. Not very long after, both had slipped into the first peaceful slumber they didn't enjoy for days.

It was already late in the evening when Aragorn came by to look after them and he found them, still fully clothed, except for Haldir’s bare torso and Legolas’ opened leggings, spooned up on the bed. Haldir was lying behind Legolas, one hand protectively resting on the growing body of his husband.

Aragorn smiled at the sight. It was something to warm his heart and he quietly pulled a blanket over them, blowing out the candles in the room and then left them to rest.

It had long grown dark when Haldir awoke, inhaling the scent of Legolas’ hair. His body felt warm and relaxed against him. His back snuggled tightly to his own body.

To Haldir’s surprise his own back did nurt urt that much anymore, but he knew that this was only a short lived luxury. As soon as he would move, it would start aching again. But in this state he felt like in the warm cocoon, safe, happy and oh, so much in love.

His hand was still resting on the swollen belly and Haldir concentrated on all the feelings his hand could absorb. A child, it came to his head. Their child. Something they wished for, for so long. Something that had caused their separation. NO! That was not the reason for their separation. It had been their own stupidity and pride. They wouldn’t make the same mistake again.

This time they would stand together, go all the way together and wherever Legolas would be going he would follow.

Was it because his back did not hurt at this moment or because of Legolas’ firm bodyssedssed against him, Haldir didn’t know, but his body was growing aroused. A nice form of arousal, actually. Not the frantic need for satisfaction, not the hunger or addiction. No, it was like a warm feeling spreading throughout his body, leaving it tingling and humming. He wanted to feel Legolas’ skin on his, share this feeling with him, hold him, caress him and make him feel all his love and devotion.

Very carefully, Haldir undid the rest of the fastenings of his lovers tunic and the shirt underneath. At last he could feel all of the creamy skin of Legolas’ torso underneath his hands.

Legolas shifted slightly as he felt the warm touch of a hand on his skin and awoke slowly. At first he seemed disorientated and flinched at the touch. But only a moment later he remembered and closed his eyes fighting down the grief and fear that had already locked themselves again in his mind and throat. Haldir was not dead, as he had believed. Instead Haldir was lying here beside him, alive and warm, holding him close.