Barriers both Noble and Arduous

Fic Name : Barriers Both Noble and Arduous 7/?
Pairing : Glorfindel/Erestor, Haldir/Elladan, Elohir/Erestor, Elrohir/Elladan, Haldir/Rumil, Elrohir/Rumil. Viva La Amore! Elves, Elves, let there be elves!
Rating : NC17 (No holds Barred. Thus you are warned)
Timeline : During the Third Age before the War of the Ring.
Synopsis : Erestor fights with the past, Glorfindel is wounded severely. Several factors complicate them getting together, but love blossoms amid the pain.
Disclaimer : I don't claim to own anything or make any money. Suing me will not do any good, you'd get a quarter at the most. Tolkien owns all the pretty elves.
Author's note : Haldir is a “Watch” Warden in my fic. Some mistakes with putting Elrohir’s name instead of Elladan. Sorry. It happens.

Chapter Seven

They had stopped for the night, Glorfindel was really too weak to travel farther and Elladan had called a halt. A strange silence had fallen upon the group of elves, each avoiding the look of the other. So many questions unsaid and unanswered rippled through their minds. Finally, Rumil offered to cook the game that was hunted and they sat around a small fire as he did so.

Elrohir sat near Rumil, sharpening one of his blades, busily paying attention to it without speaking. Elladan was with Haldir, speaking in low tones. Erestor rested alone, leaning against a rock, while one of the other elves tended to Glorfindel’s wounds. Rumil cast a sharp glance at Elrohir and sighed. He knew exactly how Elrohir felt. Elladan hadn’t spoken to him the entire day. His gaze shifted to Haldir’s back, eyes traveling down the hard planes of his shoulders and the way his long silky hair contradicted them. He tensed when Haldir’s arm reached out and draped over Elladan’s shoulders. Their faces were very close now, close enough to touch, but with their backs to the others, it was too difficult to tell what they were doing or saying.

He jumped as Elrohir’s knuckles cracked, glancing directly at his companion and sympathy edged into his eyes as he saw the look of fury in the younger twin’s gaze. While the meat cooked he reached over to Elrohir’s hand and laid his over it. His friend swore under his breath. “I can’t take much more of this.” he said very quietly. “I’m sorry Rumil. I’m not much conversation tonight.”

“That’s alright.” Rumil said quietly. He turned the meat over. “Elrohir….” He swallowed. “Is it wrong? Do you think….”

“No.” Elrohir’s voice was almost a snap. “No its not, I won’t believe it.” he shook his head fiercely. “But I will never tell Elladan.” He looked away from the site and glanced down at his now very sharp blade.

“Neither will I tell Haldir. So it seems we both are at an impass. Neither s abs able to sate our desires.” Rumil’s voice was barely above a whisper.

So finally, he admitted it, Elrohir caught his friend’s eyes again and held them. “If you are not doing anything else tonight.” he found himself saying.

Rumil’s eyebrows knitted together, they could not….they did not hold any particular love for each other. It would simply be lust. That was all. But it would be something, some way to release the frustration. He simply nodded. “I accept. After dinner.”

Haldir and Elladan were talking quietly as well. “It has been a long time, my friend. But you know, I never expected anything from you.” Haldir smiled. He and Elladan had always seen eye to eye on just about everyone, it had been one of the chief draws to Elrond’s eldest. “I understand, you know. Its quite alright.”

“What do you understand?” Elladan frowned, he had been talking with Haldir that night, and they had both agreed to keep their friendship on a level that did not include the intensity of their previous encounters. He wasn’t sure entirely if Haldir would have understood at all, but for some reason, the Lorien elf had not put up any protest.

“Frustrating, isn’t it? Wanting what you can’t have.” Haldir glanced back to the fire where Rumil and Elrohir were seated, just in time to see an intimate look pass between them. He looked away. “I -do- care for you, and would have you again. But I value your friendship more than that. I’ve never met anyone who I can talk to as I can to you. I won‘t forget the nights that we shared.”

“You never talk at all, according to rumor.” Elladan smirked. It -was- true, Haldir rarely spoke to anyone of his feelings, he was not good at conversation. He was better at directing and controlling a situation, he was not good with words from the heart. “Yes…I know. It is, and I -will- tell him. He is not aware that I have spoke to father already. He raised my ire today, unfortunately.”

“Brothers have a way of doing that.” Haldir nodded sagely, ignoring Elladan‘s comment regarding his lack of . He was not so lucky, in Lorien it would be difficult to get what he truly wanted. He never seemed to get a moments peace from his duties.

Rumil called the party of elves to come to get their dinner, and the fare was presented with the barest of luxuries, but still very tasty. Erestor did not come over to eat, however. Haldir took a bite of the fare and sighed with appreciation.

Elladan echoed the sigh and grinned at Rumil. “Aye, Rumil. You’re a good elf to have around. You cook a fine meal, as well as any maid would.”

“He’s quite correct, my brother.” Haldir nodded his endorsement of the meal. He licked the sauce upon his fingers, causing his younger sibling to blush severely. He was not used to praise from Haldir, and when he received it, it sent shivers up his spine. That sweet tongue snaking out to taste the sauce found him experiencing a tightening in his groin, and feeling very glad that he would be able to sate his desire this night.

“Thank you.” Rumil murmured softly, lowering his gaze to his own plate.

Elladan rose and took a bowl over to where Glorfindel rested, crouching as he studied the blonde. “I know you’re not entirely inert my friend, he’s not going to come over here, so why don’t you go take this to him?”

Glorfindel had been pretending to be sleeping, but apparently it had not worked as a ruse. He grunted and shrugged. “If he wanted to be near me, he’d be here.” He complained, almost sounding like a small child who had not got his way.

Elladan rolled his eyes, “Really, Glorfindel. One might think that it was you who was the younger, not I. If you want Erestor, you’re going to have to throw away that pride of yours and -go- to him. He get anything for dinner, so here.”

Glorfindel looked over to where Erestor was sitting with his back to the group, staring up at the stars. The moon illuminated his face, troubled as it was, and touched the ancient elf’s heart, surly though he was at the moment. With an exaggerated groan, he allowed Elladan to help him to his feet. The world spun a little at the sudden change in altitude and he braced himself. Eventually, the vertigo subsided, and he managed to breathe steadily again. “I’m alright.” He reassured Elladan, and took the bowl.

“Don’t overdo it.” Elladan warned. “I’m going to wash up, and scout around. I‘ll be back later.” With that, Elladan walked away from the camp.

Glorfindel found that walking on his own wasn’t as entirely easy as he might have expected. His site was somewhat awkward givin one eye was now completely covered with a bandage. restrest of his body contained a variety of bruises, and one of his ankles was slightly sprained from the fall off his horse. Therefore, he limped over to where Erestor rested and sat down heavily, causing the other to start in surprise. “Good evening.” Glorfindel said, mustering a smile. “You haven’t eaten. You should try it, Rumil’s cooking is very good.”

Erestor’s heart began to beat a little faster. His eyes narrowed, however. “You should not be walking around.” He said harshly, ignoring the bowl. “I am sure that it is fine fare, but I am not hungry, I wish to be alone. Good night.” He made as if to rise, but Glorfindel’s hand snaked out and grabbed his arm in a vice grip.

“No you don’t.” the blonde shook his head. “You are going to stay here, for once and hear me out.” He tried to keep the ire out of his one good eye, but really Erestor was -impossible-.

Erestor’s own visage flashed with rage. “How dare you order me around? You have no right. Let go of me.” he hissed.

“Erestor, will you just be quiet and listen to me for once. Valar help me.” he took a deep breath. “Calm down, and let me speak.” Glorfindel released his grip upon Erestor’s arm, hoping that the elf he desperately needed to talk to would relent.

His war warred with his body. Get away -now-. You know what happens every time you are around him. You can’t do this. Leave. But he made the mistake of looking into Glorfindel’s eyes and seeing the sincerity there. It made his heart lurch and flutter, and finally he ceased resisting, bringing his legs up and resting his arms on his knees. “As you wish.” he yielded.

Sucking in his breath, Glorfindel’s mind raced to figure out what to say that would not scare Erestor away now. “I am sorry that I surprised you so in the Hall of Fire. It was wrong of me. I should have asked.” he spoke carefully, emphasizing every word, and watching Erestor’s face.

The younger elf frowned, listening to the heartfelt apology. It was sincere. It was even filled with remorse. He -could- forgive, but what could he then do about the other times? “I forgive you.” he found himself saying. “But that does not mean anything more than that.” Erestor said quickly.

Glorfindel cleared his throat, trying to think of something else to say, “Erestor…” he wanted so much to reach out to the other, but words failed him now. He looked so defensive, strung tight and afraid. Afraid of him? “I will not hurt you.”

“I know.” Erestor whispered. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“You care for me, I can see it. You want me too, you returned my kiss earlier. Can we not…try? I will go slow. As slow as you wish.” He resisted the urge to pull Erestor into his arms. He could not go through his life wanting what he could never have, it would be torture.

He shook his head sorrowfully. “I wish I could. Please understand. You must forget about this. Forget about me.” Even if Glorfindel could forget about him, Erestor did not believe he would ever be able to forget the look in the blonde’s eyes just now.

“What happened to you, Erestor?” Glorfindel asked then, “Because I cannot accept this. You want me, I want you. Its more than just lust, I can see it in your eyes. You war with pain every day. Elrond refused to tell me when I asked. He warned me, but it was too late. Erestor…Tell me. Tell me so that I can understand.”

“Very well.” Elrond’s advisor’s tone became very somber as a hollow look came into his beautiful eyes. He clasped his hands together. “I am guilty of a grievous crime, Glorfindel. A crime so heinous that were it known by any other those who do, I would be shunned. You would hate me, as much as I hate myself.”

Glorfindel’s one good eye widened, this he had not been accepting. With impulse, he pulled the other elf into his arms and held him there, surprised that there was no resistance. Erestor literally curled up in his arms as though they was a haven from all evil in the world. “I could never hate you.” he shook his head fervently.

“You will. Elrond did, long ago. It was my fault. All of it. I do not deserve to be alive, but the valar did not allow my attempt to end things and so this is my punishment. To bear the burden.”

Did not allow my attempt to end things? Did he hear right? Glorfindel’s fingers found Erestor’s hair and stroked it gently.

“I took Celebrian, by force.” Erestor shuddered as Glorfindel’s fingers in his hair froze. “Are you sure that you want to hear this?”

“Continue…” Glorfindel nodded, his blood already running cold. Somehow, deep within his heart he knew there was more to this tale. Erestor could not have done such a horrible thing, he just knew it. Even without the tale, he knew it. It had to be wrong. There had to be a reason. A siA silver tear fell from Erestor’s cheek as his mind’s eye returned to the past. A past he would have truly liked to forget forever.

***

Elsewhere in the night, two young elves sated their lust with each other, and unbeknownst to them a pair of angry eyes were fixed upon them…rage filling the heart of their voyeur.

***

To Be Continued….

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