Strange Allies

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A/N:
Sandra - Oh, I feel your agony, girl! I can't tell you how many times I've tried to load chapters with notes and the thing kicks me off or I forget to put a chapter title in so it doesn't take. Makes me wanna pull my hair out, it does! Awww, thank you for your praise. It's really been a labor of love for me in some ways. In other ways I just want to commit elficide (if there is such a thing). It played like a movie to me as well. Sometimes, truly, I don't even feel like I'm writing it. Just I'm seeing it and trying to "report" what I see. If that makes a bit of sense. I'm not sure how many more chapters. I wanna say about 10 but I can't be too sure. He could throw another twist at me, you just never know! lol!

Naira - yes, finally! I don't think that pretty elf is going to be lonely for long! There was never a doubt in my mind that someone would snatch him right up! lol!

Paige - yes! All in good time. It certainly took her long enough, didn't it? Geez! The red glow in him - yes, sort of. Hopefully this chapter will answer that question for you. And if not, I'm sure the later ones will!

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“Yes,” Haldir whispered to her neck between urgent kisses.

Annowe moaned in anguish as she felt his need wash over her, drowning her. How could she say such a thing? What of Legolas? Certainly there was a special place in the depths of Mount Doom for one as treacherous as she!

Again, she moaned, torn between her desire for the March Warden and her loyalty to the Prince of Mirkwood.

“Little one,” Haldir breathed against her skin, unable to voice his overwhelming feelings for her.

“I can’t do this,” she whimpered, the guilt gnawing at her. When did this happen? How did it happen?

“It is too late,” he hissed against her throat between greedy kisses to her delicate skin. “It is done.”

Annowe made a strangled noise and he raised his eyes to her. The pain he saw on her face made his heart ache. Tenderly, he stroked her cheek, needing her to understand how desperately he wanted her. To Mordor with Legolas! He did not love her! He did not need her! He had abandoned her without so much as a backwards glance!

“It is done, little one, why must you continue to fight it?” He asked soothingly, the back of his elegant fingers caressing her temple.

“I am damned,” she trembled. “I know it. I have betrayed him. He loved me and I betrayed him.”

“Then we are both damned,” he said. “For you would not have betrayed him if I had not asked you to.”

She seemed to consider this for a moment and he kissed the tip of her nose.

“I should have left you at Helm’s Deep,” she whispered miserably, turning her head away. “I could have.”

“Yes, you could have but you did not,” he countered. “And I could have made it to the Havens alone – I need not have told you that I had heard the call.”

This came as a surprise to her and she jerked her head back to stare in disbelief at him.

“You lied to me?” She asked in shock, beginning to struggle again. Why would he lie to her about something so unimportant? He could have told her Legolas perished on the wall and she never would have known. If he were going to lie why didn’t he lie about something like that?

Haldir smiled silkily, the gleam that she knew all too well returning to his gray eyes. “I did not lie to you, little one. I merely did not tell you everything that I could have.”

She narrowed her eyes at him and he took the opportunity to let her rise to her feet. She would not run from him now, he had sparked her interest and would stay to see what he might say. He rolled over into a sitting position and watched her as she brushed herself off and eyed him suspiciously.

“I could have found the way to the Havens myself but I wanted you to accompany me,” he admitted.

He grinned at her dark look and decided to confess all of his transgressions against her. She would find it in him sooner or later and he wanted her to know. She deserved at least that much from him.

As he began to speak, the fog started to creep toward them and Annowe turned a wary gaze toward the forest.

“We should go,” she said softly.

Haldir turned to glance over his shoulder and could see the trees seemingly begin to draw closer together and he quickly stood up to take a better look.

“Come,” Annowe said, reaching for his hand.

The mist grew thicker around them and Haldir squeezed her tiny hand in his reluctant to leave but understanding that he must. He nodded and the two of them began walking hastily back to the safety of the house hand in hand.

They quietly slipped into the safety of the house, as the fog grew heavier outside. There was no sound and no one about. The fire had been left burning in the grate but there was no sign of Tom or Goldberry. Annowe smiled ruefully. Both of them had known all along.

“I must confess everything to you now. In the beginning I wanted both of you,” Haldir began as they moved toward the warmth of the fireplace. When she nodded at him, he continued. “And when Legolas left Lothlorien I believed that was the end of it but then you came to me.”

“By the waterfall,” she murmured, staring into the flames. “Yes, I remember.”

“When I had you for myself – when you took me like that with your desire – I knew then that I could have that sweet bliss again. You wanted my desire just as I wanted yours,” he admitted softly.

“So that part was true. You did want me for yourself no matter how short the time,” she mused, glancing at him curiously.

“Yes and no,” he said. He leaned one arm against the mantle and sighed. Why was this so difficult for him? He should just come out with it! Now was his chance to tell her!

“When you left me in Lothlorien, I no longer cared what happened to me. I knew I was damned and my fate did not matter,” he finally said.

“No!” She hissed and grabbed his arm. “Why?”

Slowly, he turned to gaze down on her upturned face. Gently, he took her into his arms and smoothed her hair back, watching the thick curls spill over her shoulder.

“I prepared myself for the Halls of Mandos,” he continued softly ignoring her question. “I was ready to leave until the time came for me to make my choice at Helm’s Deep and I heard your words again. I knew I could not betray your trust in me no matter how badly I wanted to perish.”

“But why? Why would you do this? Why would you let your self die?” She was shaking now and becoming more agitated the more he continued to speak to her. Never mind that she had just been considering the same fate only a short time before!

“Because I knew what I wanted was wrong!” He whispered hoarsely. “It was wrong and I would condemn both of us but I didn’t care!”

The stunned naiad blinked several times trying to understand what he wanted and what was so wrong with it.

He could see that she was struggling to come to grips with his confession. If only she had touched his heart the first time they bonded she would know everything! She would have seen it all and he could have soothed her then. But she had been frightened. She had been afraid to hurt him so she did not touch the dark red ember that burned so brightly inside of him.

The bitter irony of it! She had feared hurting him so she did not see how deeply he cared for her. How utterly lost he would be without her.

“Why do you think I told you I needed you to guide me to the Havens?” He asked in an even tone, deciding to approach this from a different path.

Annowe shook her head, still trying to understand why he would want to let himself die. “I don’t know!” She sighed in exasperation. “To keep me away from Legolas?”

“No!” He nearly shouted at her in frustration. How could she be so blind to his desire?

“No,” he repeated more softly. “I wanted you and you alone but it was so very wrong and I knew it! I knew it was wrong and I wanted it anyway!”

He could feel her trembling in his grasp as she began to understand what had happened – how he had manipulated the circumstances and her own emotions to get what he wanted in the end.

She drew in a deep breath and slowly let it out, willing herself to remain calm. He had managed to tear her away from Legolas, damning them both in the process. And for what? To get what he wanted. She grunted in disgust. He did not care who he had hurt or why as long as he got what he wanted.

“Well, you have won, then, Haldir,” she admitted grudgingly, pulling slightly back from him and tipping her chin up in defiance. “You have what you wanted. You have won. I cannot go with you and I cannot return to Legolas. Now leave me in peace to throw myself against the Gates of Mordor for my part in this betrayal.”

“No,” he moaned, sinking to his knees in front of her and wrapping his arms around her waist holding her tightly. “No. You cannot!”

He could hear her heart beating like thunder in her chest. With a sigh, he ran his fingertips over her back as he held her close. She still did not understand his words or how much she meant to him! It was so much more than she even suspected!

“Why not?” She frowned coldly. “You have what you wanted and you will leave for Valinor. You said yourself the pain from breaking the bond will pass so what does it matter if Legolas breaks it or if I die? Either way it is broken and I will be free.”

“No!” He cried gazing urgently into her face, willing her to understand. “You cannot do this to me! Even if there had been no Legolas I would have done it all anyway! That night I kissed you in Rivendell I knew I had to have you! I felt it then.”

“What did you feel then?” She demanded.

“I will not live without you, little one,” he whispered. “You are my very soul.”

Annowe stared at him in a stunned silence before her knees began to shake as the gravity of his words struck her.

“Haldir,” she choked, cupping his upturned face in her hands. She trembled in his arms and he pulled her down to kiss him.

“I cannot leave you,” he breathed against her lips between desperate kisses. “I will not. You cannot make me go. I will not survive.”

“No,” she gasped in shock. “You must go to Valinor. You cannot stay here! You will go mad!”

“I do not care!” He hissed adamantly, biting her tender neck. “I will go mad if you make me leave!”

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