Strange Allies

~~~

Haldir hung his head. Annowe was gone and she did not need to return. She could simply slip off without another word to him. Goldberry could lead him to the Havens!

Panic began to creep over him. He should tell her! He needed to tell her! If she did not know how he felt, how could she choose between them? Was it already too late? Would she just walk away without another word to him? Without even a backwards glance?

He could not bear the thought. Certainly he had to mean enough to her that she would at least bid him a safe journey! She must return! If she did not then he would go after her! Yes, that is what he would do. He would go after her and make her understand that she could not leave him.

He sighed heavily as Tom watched him thoughtfully. There was certainly much more between the elf and naiad than either cared to admit. He wondered how long they had gone on with this charade and how much longer it would last. He smiled to himself.

Knowing Annowe’s stubbornness and the legendary haughtiness of elves it would be a small miracle if they could ever bend enough to meet in the middle. But Tom had an inkling that all it would take is for one of them to bend even a little for the dam of feelings to break between them.

“Have you told her of your thoughts?” Tom murmured as he gazed into the fire. He felt the elf shift uncomfortably next to him.

“I believed she would know since we have bonded,” Haldir answered softly, knowing it was not the correct answer and feeling even more foolish for not telling her in the first place.

Silence greeted his words as Tom let him consider his folly. Haldir sighed heavily and closed his eyes. He wanted her to know but he was frightened to tell her! She wanted Legolas! He knew that! If he told her of his true feelings for her and she rejected him, it would be worse than never knowing! He could still cling to the illusion that she was his alone if she never knew the true extent of his feelings for her.

The quiet creak of the rocking chair broke his line of thought and he opened his eyes to find Tom studying him intently.

“What would you do if she returned your ardor?” He asked with a grin.

Haldir blinked. He had not quite considered that. If she cared for him more than Legolas what would he do? What could he do? He groaned. He could do nothing! He could not stay with her! Even if he could have her he could not keep her! Oh, the bitterness of it! He would not leave her and yet he could not stay! Even if he had what he desired he could not keep it! No matter what their feelings for each other they were stuck!

“Is it possible for me to remain here?” He asked hopefully.

Tom’s bushy brows met his hairline and his eyes disappeared as he laughed merrily at the idea.

“Why would you wish to hide from Valinor?” He laughed. “I think the madness is already upon you!”

Haldir lowered his eyes and studied his hands clinched over his knees. It did sound like madness once he voiced it. To refuse Valinor for a naiad! What had he been thinking?

“Yes, indeed, the madness is upon you,” Tom said more gently as he smiled. “It is the madness of desire! The daughter of Ulmo has seeped into your veins and flows through you, does she not?”

He did not wait for an answer but continued as he leaned back in his rocker and stared off into the distance, his voice growing soft. “Yes, your flesh and blood calls to her but it is more than that. Even your very soul calls to her.”

The elf did not answer but when he raised his head to look at Tom, he saw the old one smiling wistfully at him.

“I, too, was smitten by a daughter of Ulmo. You have my condolences, young elf,” Tom laughed.

Haldir smiled slightly in spite of himself. Somehow he did not believe that Goldberry had quite the temper or passion that her younger sibling possessed. But that did not matter.

“What can I do?” He asked. “I cannot leave her and yet I cannot stay here!”

Tom seemed to consider this for a while as he resumed rocking in his chair humming softly to himself.

“Perhaps you should speak to her of your dilemma,” he finally suggested.

Haldir grunted. “So you do not know if I can remain here?” He pressed.

“You cannot remain here, of this I am certain,” Tom answered firmly. “But perhaps she would be willing to join you in Valinor if she knew of your feelings for her.”

“She can come to Valinor with me?” Haldir asked, his heart thumping. He had been hesitant to ask, not wanting to know the answer in case it was negative.

“I do not see why not!” Tom replied, smiling slyly. “If she knew how you felt about her and she returned your feelings, I am certain Ulmo could find a place for the two of you to be together.”

Haldir eyed him for a few minutes and Tom grinned wickedly.

“Just like he found a place for you?” Haldir murmured, finally understanding the mist and the ancient trees and the danger that could lie in the forest for those who strayed from the path.

Yes, it would make sense. He and Goldberry were safe here. No one could come into the valley uninvited. Haldir’s heart felt as if it were suddenly unchained and soared to the sky. But he would have to tell Annowe! He would have to bear his feelings for her once and for all and let her make the choice. The thought made him tremble. If she refused him and decided to remain behind with Legolas he would perish. Of that he was certain.

He suddenly became painfully aware of how much he had hidden from her and even from himself. He had refused to admit that she could mean so much to him but now that the time was drawing near to leave her he could not stand the thought. Yet all the while they were together he could not admit the depth of his feelings for her. He had assured himself that the pain would be less than when Glorfindel left but what if it were worse? Could he bear it? Did he even want to chance it?

“You cannot tell her until you know how she feels,” Tom voiced for him.

Haldir raised one dark eyebrow in surprise.

The old one laughed heartily. “I know your kind, my young March Warden! You want her desperately and yet your pride will not allow you to speak the truth of your heart. Funny that, yes?”

Haldir inclined his head guiltily. Yes, it was true. It was his pride that would not allow him to go to her and beg her to come with him for if she refused him he would have nothing! He would be left with nothing more than that last painful memory of leaving her behind because she would not have him.

“Fret not,” Tom soothed amicably. “I will make her confess her heart to you but you must be ready for she has a considerable amount of pride as well and will be quite angry with you and me both.”

“Yes, indeed, she does,” the elf admitted. “You will not hurt her.”

“Nay. Only her pride,” the other assured him.

Haldir sighed and closed his eyes. He would know the truth of her heart and then he could confess his own. He must be ready. It would be his only chance.

“When?” He asked anxiously.

“Tomorrow at dusk,” Tom answered with a twinkle in his eye.

If the two sisters were as alike as he believed, soon they would all know how Annowe felt about the March Warden. He smiled at the thought and leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes and humming happily to himself.

~~~