Deny Me Not

Disclaimer: LOTR belongs to the creative genius of JRR Tolkien, not me.

Deny Me Not

Chapter 6


Although Erestor’s condition remained unchanged, Elrond was torn between his reluctance to leave his patient unattended and his need to see to Glorfindel. However his instincts and his own sense of perception were telling him that the maiden was a danger to Erestor, and that he should not leave them alone, and since he had always trusted his inner feelings, he heeded the warning. He decided the most prudent solution would be to request his assistant’s aid in treating Glorfindel, yet when he turned to speak to Amien he was surprised to find she was no longer in the chamber. Shaking his head in confusion at Amien’s strange behaviour, he made his way swiftly to the infirmary where Glorfindel had been taken. Elrond was disturbed to note Amien’s presence at the seneschal’s side with a raised eyebrow sudden understanding dawned. She obviously cared deeply for him, and she had not behaved in a particularly rational manner since she set eyes on the handsome golden lord, so perhaps she was even capable of causing Erestor harm. The matter certainly required further investigation, but at a more appropriate time.

“Glorfindel?” he asked loudly, rousing his friend to consciousness as he none too gently pushed Amien aside, and indicated with a gesture that he required Elladan’s assistance. The seneschal managed a weak smile, but his face was soon wracked with lines of pain from his untreated wounds and Elrond quickly sought to dismiss the others from the chamber.

“Elrohir, will you please go and watch over Erestor? I will send word as soon as we know how our valiant Balrog slayer fares.” With a slight tilt of his head, Elrond also wordlessly requested his younger son to escort Amien from the chamber.

“Of course Adar,” Elrohir acquiesced as he took the maiden gently but firmly by the arm.

Both Elrohir and Elladan had initially been attracted to the beautiful daughter of Erestor’s new scribe, and had unsuccessfully sought her attention on several occasions. Celebrían had explained that the maiden was infatuated with Glorfindel, and like their naneth, they were not at all pleased with her improper behaviour but they were both confidant that their beloved tutors were well able to deal with the situation. Besides it was not their place to interfere however they had promised each other they would do so if necessary.

“Come Amien, I do not believe your assistance is required. Perhaps you would be kind enough to inform Lady Celebrían of Glorfindel’s injuries?” Elrohir spoke coldly and in a tone of command that gave the maiden had no choice but to reluctantly allow Elrohir to lead her from the chamber.


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“I need to see Erestor,” were the seneschal’s first words before he fell weakly back against the pillows. He closed his eyes as if to draw on his inner strength, and then grabbed Elrond’s hand. “I need to see Erestor, now!” Bright eyes filled with an unnamed fear stared into the Healer’s. “Please Elrond! There is something wrong with my beloved.”

“Is that why you were returning to Imladris on your own?” Elladan asked. He and Elrohir had been the ones to find the seneschal who had apparently been travelling alone when he was attacked and strangely there had been no sign of the o mem members of his patrol. Glorfindel nodded wearily, what little strength he had left deserting him as his injuries and inner turmoil took their toll.

“An unwise decision. However, the sooner you allow me to tend to your wounds, the sooner you will be able to see Erestor,” Elrond commented before he shifted his attention to more immediate matters. “Elladan if you will?” Elrond asked gesturing for his elder son to help remove Glorfindel’s attire. They washed away the dried blood and dirt did with well practiced efficiency, ignoring Glorfindel’s grunts of protest and pain as Elrond proceeded to discover the nature of the injuries.

There was blood pouring from the gaping wound in the seneschal’s right thigh and the broken shaft of a black arrow protruded from his left shoulder. Whilst Elladan applied pressure and bandages to stem the flow, Elrond carefully felt the swollen area, hissing with disgust at the ugly grey colour of the wound that indicated the tip was poisoned. Fortunately it was not imbedded too deeply, and with a swift movement, Elrond pulled the barb free. He examined the wound more closely and breathed a sigh of relief when he ascertained that the type of poison used was one for which he had a remedy already prepared. He immediately smeared a liberal amount of the healing salve into the injury and offered Glorfindel a draught of a potion that dulled pain. The Balrog slayer accepted and aster a few minutes was feeling well enough to determine that he was not being told the entire truth about Erestor.


“Where is he? Why is he not here already?” asked Glorfindel, now openly displaying his suspicions. Reluctantly Elrond could not help but answer truthfully.

“You were right to be concerned for Erestor. He is not well.” The words were an understatement and as close to an outright lie as Elrond had ever uttered, but he had not the heart to say more.

“He is fading, I can feel it,” Glorfindel stated with sudden certainty. Elrond nodded.

“And it is no wonder!” declared Celebrían angrily as she stormed into the chamber, waving a dusty piece of parchment. “I can not believe you would do something so cruel to Erestor!”

“What do you mean? I would rather die than cause Erestor a single moment of grief,” replied Glorfindel both confused and hurt by Celebrían’s accusation.

“Then why did you send him this? I found it when I went to your chambers to collect your morning robe,” explained Celebrían. Glorfindel read the lies written in his own hand and without a second thought rose shakily from the bed and stood before Elrond.

“Take me to my betrothed now, son of Eärendil!”

The inner glow of one who had lived in Valinor burned brightly and the authority in the voice filled with pain and fear for his lover was not to be denied. The gentle and carefree Glorfindel had vanished beneath the countenance of the fearsome warrior who had slain the Balrog, and was now filled with determination to save the one he loved above all others.

“As you wish, my Lord,” said Elrond with the respect he knew this Glorfindel deserved as his elder and the Lord of a noble House.

Without further hesitation he offered his arm as a crutch to the unsteady elf and led him to the darkened chamber where Erestor lay and obeyed the gesture of a single raised hand that indicated he should remain outside. Moving as quickly as his paininjuinjuries would allow, Glorfindel limped to the bed and bent to place a loving kiss on the pale brow of his unconscious lover. Tears filled his eyes as he cast his eyes over the blue white pallor of Erestor’s skin that matched the ice cold feel beneath his lips. With a sad sigh, he kissed first the closed eyes, then the finely boned cheeks and finally the lips thasteasted of tears yet did not open to welcome the sweetness of his lover’s tongue. The slight shifting of a body in the chair opposite reminded Glorfindel that Elrohir was still present.

“I will tend to Erestor. Leave us now and close the door on your way out Elrohir,” he said with an affectionate smile for the young one.

“Bring him back to us, Glorfindel,” whispered Elrohir as he bent to place a chaste kiss on a cold cheek.

“I will, and if I am too late I will follow him to Mandos, for I can not live without him,” pledged Glorfindel without taking his eyes from the seemingly lifeless form on the bed.

Elrohir felt a lump rise to his throat at such a declaration of love, and before he pulled the door closed he glanced backwards to see Glorfindel disregard the pain of his injuries and lay beside the wasted body of the unaware Erestor. With tender affection he held him close, demonstrating his love with the most delicate and loving caresses Elrohir had ever witnessed. The pale skin seemed to blush with pleasure beneath Glorfindel’s touch, and when he whispered what Elrohir could only assume were words of love into the advisor’s ear, a soft sigh escaped lips that were once again claimed by the seneschal.

Elrohir smiled with relief at the sign of improvement in Erestor and eagerly left the lovers to their privacy as he sought out Elrond to relay the good news.

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“Erestor, can you hear me?” Glorfindel asked hopefully at the small indication of returning awareness of his lover.

“I hear you, but this is only a dream. My Glorfindel no longer loves me,” replied a tearful Erestor as he turned away from the apparition he believed the seneschal to be, only to have his face turned tenderly back by the touch of a finger.

“I am no dream, I am your Glorfindel and I love you now and forever,” the seneschal reassured him. “Search your heart. Can you not hear our song?” Erestor closed his eyes again, and listened for that which had almost faded away.

“It is faint, as if someone is singing in a chamber whose door is being slowly closed,” he affirmed sadly. “Soon I will be unable to hear it and knew that when the last note dies away, I will gratefully enter the Halls of Waiting.”

“Then break the door down and join in the song, or I will follow you.”

“I have not the strength left in me to do as you ask,” he whispered as he slipped back into unconsciousness.

“Then I will lend you my strength, even as I give you my heart and soul, and we will overcome this together,” declared Glorfindel. He wrapped both his arms around his lover and pressed his lips against Erestor’s in a searing kiss that was filled with desperation pas passionate need, sharing the heat of his desire and brightly burning love in both body and spirit. Flames licked greedily at the door that had almost closed between them, and in moments it was nothing but ashes, having been burned away from both sides. Erestor’s inner voice joined with Glorfindel’s as they sang their joyous song of love.

“I love you Erestor, I never stopped loving you and I never will,” Glorfindel whispered reassuringly as the eyes he gazed into slowly began to focus.

“As I love you Glorfindel, ever and always,” replied the advisor. Although Erestor was weak and exhausted, he found the strength to take Glorfindel’s hand and bring it to his lips. Had they just made love for the first time, Glorfindel could not have been happier at the gesture.

“Then let us wait no longer and ask the Valar to bear witness to our love. I would bind with you this very moment, my beloved.” Glorfindel’s words were spoken as a formal vow and Erestor accepted them as such.

“As the Valar are my witnesses, I will bind with you, my love, here and now,” replied Erestor. This time when they kissed, a sweet harmony of voices joined in their song and they knew that their union had been blessed by the Valar.

“I am afraid neither of us is in any condition to consummate our binding,” said Glorfindel as he gingerly moved onto his back to ease the pressure on his injured shoulder when the kiss finally ended.

“Nay, we are not, and I doubt that I can keep awake much longer even if we could,” said Erestor as he unsuccessfully tried to stifle a yawn against Glorfindel’s uninjured shoulder where his head now rested. “Glorfindel?”

“Hmm?” The seneschal’s response was also sleepy.

“Why did you write that letter?”

“You are mistaken, I did not write that wicked deception my love.” Glorfindel said as he drifted into reverie.

“Then who did?”