The Price of Pride

Elvish translations

Seron vell – my beloved
Melin chen – I love you
Im naa sinome – I am here
Gwador – brother
Hannon chen – thank you
Nach maetolo – you’re welcome
Maer – good
Meldis – friend (female)
Meron ron – lover
Mellon - friend
Ae syntrea chen – please
Veston – I promise

Chapter 47

After they had eaten, I motioned the twins to my side. “You have worked alongside these people all day,” I said, speaking softly in Elvish. “Have they impressed you as they have me?”

“Aye,” Elrohir replied, “for my part at least. Hamaden is a master of herblore. Ada could have done no better today, short of using his healing touch.”

“The greybeard over there,” Elladan said, pointing out an older man, “Haleth is his name. He claims no title, but he leads the others by quiet example, much as I saw the healer doing. Already, the fires are out, the Orcs are burned, the livestock contained for the night. They are a strong, self-sufficient group.”

I agreed, sharing with them what I had learned of and from Freyla. “Estel will need to stay warm and dry for some time to heal. I am no healer, but even I know he almost died today. Shall we offer our help, such as it is, in exchange for a place to stay while he recovers?”

“I think they would give their help unasked for and unpaid, but our help they shall get, ask or not,” Elladan commented.

“Good. Will you ask Haleth to put me to work? When I spoke to Freyla earlier, she tried to refuse. She knows of our rank, and though she was not intimidated, she was perhaps concerned that their simple ways would not meet our approval,” I told them.

“Simple, they may be, but they have done all they need to survive and flourish,” Elladan replied. “I will speak to Haleth. He is wise enough not to refuse our aid.” With that, he went off to speak to the old man.

That night, Elladan and Elrohir spread their bedrolls out to dry, accepting pallets near the fire. I lay down next to Aragorn, one hand on his shoulder, subconsciously monitoring the rise and fall of his chest. As long as I could feel his breathing, I knew he was still alive.

Though he was still unconscious the next morning, Aragorn’s color seemed improved and I was able to coax him to drink some of the broth Freyla prepared. Having doll Ill I could for him, I left him in her care and went to offer my hands to Haleth. Seeing with clear eyes the destruction that had been done, I wondered immediately about food supplies. When I offered to hunt, Haleth accepted gratefully, even offering me a mount to speed my travel. He suggested I ride to the east where game was usuallentlentiful. I armed myself for battle as well as for hunting, the previous day’s experience having shown me that Orcs had spread even this far south. The horse they provided would not have been a match for the horses my father rode, direct descendants of the Mearas, but it was easily as fine as any other in my father’s stable. The Riddermark was indeed the land of the Horselords.

I hunted for several hours, bringing down a variety of small game, but I really wanted larger prey, something to hold us for a few days. My luck held and I found a deer that fell to a swift arrow. My mount was hesitant at first, but he finally accepted the delunglung across his back behind me. Satisfied that I had done my part to contribute to the well being of my temporary home, I rode eagerly back to the hamlet, wanting to check on Aragorn. I knew that Freyla and Elrohir had taken good care of him, but I needed to see him for myself.

When I made it back, I surrendered my catch to the village cooks, good-naturedly bearing the twins’ teasing about my cooking. In Westron. So that the whole village knew I was hopeless at preparing a decent meal. One of the village women, Beata, shooed them away finally, telling them that if I always hunted as well as I had that day, she would gladly cook for me every day. Feeling vindicated, I went to check on Aragorn. He was asleep when I came in, but Freyla greeted me with the welcome news that he had awakened for a short time. “He sleeps now because Hamaden gave him some medicine for the pain. He should wake again this evening. Hamaden’s potions usually cause half a day’s sleep,” she assured me. “You have time to bathe before he wakes.”

I stroked Aragorn’s face tenderly before pressing a kiss to his forehead. “I am back, seron vell,” I told him before addressing Freyla’s offer. “I will bathe before I sleep, but let me see first if Haleth has more for me to do.”

“But you have done so much already,” she exclaimed.

“Have you had a break today, Freyla? Have you stopped caring and organizing once?” When she shook her head, I continued. “Then why do you expect me to do less? My father may be a King, but I am no pampered prince. I have hunted and fought, defending my home and my people. I have probably spent more nights in a bedroll than in a bed over the course of my long life. You do not need to worry about me. If I do not want to do a task, I will refuse. If I cannot do one, like cooking, I will say so, or the twins will say so for me. Let me help, Freyla. You are helping me, taking care of my … shield-brother. Please, meldis?”

She relented. “Very well, but do not complain to me that Haleth works you too hard.”

I smiled at her and went back outside. A group of men and boys were struggling to raise beams to repair one of the damaged houses. “I know nothing of building,” I told Dagrun, the man in charge, “but I can pull on the ropes to raise the beams in place.” Dagrun motioned me to a team at one end of the building and I added my strength to theirs. Building, I discovered, used different muscles, or used muscles differently, than fighting. By the time Dagrun sent us to wash before dinner, my muscles were aching n ways they had not since Glorfindel had worked me back into shape in Rivendell. I thought wistfully of the massages Arwen had given me those first few days, when I could hardly move from the muscle cramps. I still thought of her from time to time, especially at times like these when something brought back a particularly tender memory. I felt a little guilty at continuing to find such pleasure in thoughts of her, as if the love that I would always bear her was in some way betraying my new love, but I could not change my past, even if I had wanted to. I had told Aragorn about Arwen, of course, but we had not spoken of it since becoming lovers. There had been no reason to. Though my feelings toward Arwen had not changed, have never changed, I had taken a new lover. She and I had always known that we would someday go our separate ways. I had expected her to be first, but I had known it would happen, one way or the other. I loved Aragorn enough to be the one to call her mellon when next we met.

“You are preoccupied,” Freyla commented when she found me, half-dressed at the basin she had set out for me.

I still do not know what made me confide in her, a woman I barely knew, but the words came tumbling out. “Can you love two different people at the same time?” I asked her.

“That is an odd question,” she replied, “but aye, I believe you can. Is it love that troubles you?”

“It is. I have loved an Elf for more years than you can imagine, but I have never told her because love between us is forbidden. Now, I have met Estel. What I feel for him is not the same as what I feel for the Elf, for they are each unique, but it is no less strong. I think of hrom rom time to time – how can I not? We have two thousand years of history together – and then I feel guilty, as if I am betraying Estel. I do not know what to do.”

“Does Estel know of your other love?”

“He knows we were lovers and he understands why she is forbidden to me. I did not tell him that I love her. How could I when I have not told him that I love him as well?”

“You have landed yourself in quite the fix, Legolas. I assume you have a reason for not having spoken.”

I explained about Celebrian and my promise to be there for Arwen.

“You speak of things I cannot begin to imagine, but I know this, my friend. At soment, nt, you must be completely honest with Estel or the life you build together will crumble like a poorly built house. And the longer you wait to speak, the more difficult it will become.”

I knew she was right, but I also knew that I would wait until I had talked to Arwen before I spoke. My word was my bond, and I was too proud of that fact to speak sooner.

Come, Estel should wake soon and I know you will want to see him. He asked for you when he regained consciousness before.”

“Let me finish cleaning up. I will be there in just a moment.”

She left me to finish my ablutions. My spare tunic had dried so I changed back into my own clothes before joining Freyla in the main room. I sat with her and ate what she put in front of me, but my attention was all for Aragorn on the pallet nearby. As soon as he stirred, I was on the floor next to him, holding his hand, stroking his face, pleading for him to wake.

“Legolas?” he murmured, his voice cracking. I put a cup of water to his lips.

“Im naa sinome, melethron. Drink. It will help you wake up.” He drank obedie, st, still groggy from the medicine he had taken. When he had drunk his fill, I leaned down and kissed him, not caring who mige wae watching. I had almost lost him. It would be weeks, probably, before I could make love to him again, but I planned on kissing him every chance I got.

“What happened?” he asked when I released his mouth.

“You were wounded when wlpedlped stop the Orcs from destroying the farms. Do you remember the battle?”

“I could not find you,” he mumbled.

Later, when he was well, I would tell him what I thought about his endangering himself to worry about me, but now I just smiled and kissed him again. “I am fine, melethron, but you are not. Is your side very painful?”

“Not so much right now. Probably the medicine.”

“Are you hungry?” I asked.

“A little.”

“Freyla,” I called, switching back to Westron, “do you have something Estel could eat?”

“Hamaden said he could have some broth when he awoke, but nothing solid for a few more days.”

Aragorn grimaced when she mentioned broth. “I will have some if you will,” I offered in an attempt to convince him to eat.

“Very well,” he sighed, resigned.

“Maer. Two bowls of broth, please, Freyla.”

“Cosseting the invalid, my friend?” she asked teasingly. Aragorn started to take offense at her tone, but I soothed him with a reassuring caress.

“Whatever it takes to see him healed,” I replied, meeting Aragorn’s gaze as I spoke. The words were directed at Freyla, but they were really meant for him. It was as close to a declaration as I could make. The words pacified Aragorn and he drank the broth without protest when he saw me doing the same. Just as we finished, Elrohir came in.

“Maer. You are awake. I need to change the bandage and check the wound.”

“Be gentle,” Aragorn requested.

“As gentle as I can, but it will probably still hurt. Do you want something to bite on?”
“Nay,” he answered, but he reached for my hand. I squeezed, promising my support.

Elrohir cut away the bandage, revealing the ragged gash in Aragorn’s side. He probed at it gently, but Aragorn stifled a cry, bearing down on my hand. I held on as Elrohir finished his examination, hoping my grip provided some comfort amid the pain. As Elrohir began applying a healing salve, Aragorn gasped out, “Is it poisoned?”

“Nay, gwador. There is no poison. You would not be awake now if there were. It will heal, it will just take time.”

“How much time?”

“I do not know. That depends on you. If you do as I say, you will heal more quickly than if you do not. Now, let me replace the bandage, then you should sleep.”

“Do not give me something to make me sleep. I will sleep, I promise, but no more potions. Ae syntrea chen?” he pleaded.

“Theionsions, as you call them, will help ease the pain.”

“I will bear the pain. I do not like the gaps in my memory.”

Elrohir looked disapproving, but he agreed. “If you ch you your mind, you have only to ask.”

“I know. Hannon chen, gwador,” Aragorn said.

“Nach maetolo, Estel. Do you feel well enough for a little mcompcompany? Ell would like to see you as well.”

Aragorn nodded, then grimaced at the pain that even that small movement caused.

“Are you sure about not taking something?” I asked as Elrohir went to find his brother.

“I am sure. The last day is a smothering blackness. I woke up in a panic earlier today. Only hearing your voice as I awoke kept me from panicking again. I do not want to feel that way.”

Elladan came in before I could answer, full of cheer and teasing. Aragorn tried to respond in kind, to reassure his brother, but the effort obviously cost him. From behind Aragorn, I sent Elladan a discouraging look. He tarried a moment longer, then left, admonishing Aragorn to rest.

“Stay with me,” Aragorn mumbled as sleep took him again.

“Until morning,” I promised, “but then I must help our new friends. If I am not here, someone else will be and I will be nearby. I will not leave to hunt without teg yog you. Veston.”

“Mel…” He fell asleep before he could finish the sentence. I wondered then and I wonder now what he would have said if he had stayed awake just a little longer. Was he, as I hoped, trying to tell me that he loved me? Or was it something else entirely that he started to say?” I knew not, but I whispered the words I wanted to hear. “Melin chen, Estel.”