The Music in My Heart

Title: The Music in My Heart, Chapter 42
Author: Sorsha
Fandom/Pairing: Elrond/OFC, Glorfindel/Haldir, Elladan/OFC, Elrohir/Legolas, others implied
Rating: NC17
Warning: AU (Story set 770 years after ROTK); Slash and het.
Feedback: This is my first fanfic, so constructive feedback appreciated.
Archive: AFF.net’ fanfiction.net
Acknowledgements: Many thanks to Alex Cat for her help in betaing this fic. Thanks also to Lady Victoria for her comments and support.
Disclaimer: Any of the residents of Middle-earth and Aman that you recognize belong to Prof. Tolkien’s estate. The same is true about Middle-earth and Aman. I’m only visiting and admiring the “views”.
Summary: Sauron may be gone, but his legacy of evil still lingers. As Middle-earth faces the threat of another dark lord, a party of elves departs Aman on a mission for the Valar, a mission of mercy long delayed.

Chapter 42 --- Tread Softly

“Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.”
William Butler Yeats

*****

Now that they were away from the crowd in the dining hall, neither elf was sure if they were ready to become lovers. This was not a casual affair for either of them. They both knew what happened next could change the course of their lives, individually and as a couple. It had been many centuries since either had still believed in the possibility of finding their mate. It had been as long since either had considered taking a lover.

Both had a reputation for being passionate lovers, with a long line of broken hearts left scattered in their wake. Reality, as was often the case, bore little in common with their myth. After countless nights spent alone in bed, the notion was both amusing and frustrating. They had both laughed at the supreme irony of their situations; that the reputed great lovers had rarely shared their beds since the first heady bloom of their sexual maturity had begun to wane millennia ago.

This was not to say that they had not taken lovers. There had been, but neither liked to feel their bed partner was only there to satisfy some curiosity in bedding with them. They did not like feeling like a rite of passage or the purse in an outside bet or a trophy buck for some bed hunter. The older they got, the worse this situation became and it had inhibited their desire to take the risk.

For Glorfindel, Dinariel’s desertion had left him leery to trust his heart to another. He thought he had loved her and that she returned his feelings. He still felt the deep pain he had experienced when he returned from Lorien to find her letter. His recent discovery that Lomelinde was their child had reopened that wound. He found himself feeling both expectant and scared to begin a relationship with Haldir. The fact that he was considering it at all spoke volumes about his feelings for the Galadhrim.

Haldir was also waging war with his own doubts. Since his return from Mandos, he found himself feeling unsure of himself, his innate confidence shaken. He knew the danger of making a mistake; he had done just that at Helm’s Deep*. His attention had wavered for only a second, but a second was all that it took for the Uruk to drive his weapon into his exposed back. The fact that he had allowed himself to be lead back into the dining hall was a testament to his growing love for the living legend at his side.

*****

Elladan’s heart caught at the sight of the elleth waiting for him in their rooms, silently watching the moonlight reflecting off the tumbling water of the falls. She turned to greet him, a smile guaranteed to render him breathless gracing her lips. Azeriel’s smile quirked into a grin as she saw the effect she was having on her irrepressible mate. Slowly, she turned her gaze back to the falls after making sure he had seen the gleam of desire in her eyes.

A few seconds later, she was rewarded as his powerful arms slid possessively around her waist pulling her back into the cradle of his body. A subtle move of her hips confirmed the half-elf’s growing arousal. Looking up she met his glittering gaze as she tilted her head, letting his lips lay claim to hers in a burning kiss.

Turning her to face him, he lifted her up to sit on the window ledge insinuating himself between her legs without breaking the urgency of his kiss. Using the window to steady her, he let one hand slide up her trembling stomach to cup her right breast. Supporting the soft mound in his palm, he let his fingers begin the tease the swelling flesh.

Gliding slowly up the curve of her spine, his left hand began to untie the lacings at the back of her dress. Feeling the laces slip from their corresponding loops, he pulled the loosened fabric away from her upper body. Abandoning her breast for a moment, he shoved the material down her arms and let it puddle around her waist. His hands made swift work of removing her camisole freeing her breasts to the attention of his hands and mouth.

Arching onto his touch, Azeriel moaned, “Tunic… off…now!”

Elladan lifted his head from where it had been rested suckling at her left nipple and let her seeking fingers strip him to the waist. Before he could return to her breast, she began to untie his leggings. Once they were loosened, she reached inside to grasp his pulsing erection. The feel of her soft fingers spreading his oozing precum down his length before beginning to pump the pulsing shaft, drove any thought of restraint from his mind.

He reached down and yanked the skirt of her dress up to her waist. Finding she was not wearing anything beneath, he grinned. /She does love to be taken half-clothed and sprawled over some unexpected surface! She is indeed my match!/ Wasting no time, he let his fingers comb through the patch of golden curls at the top of her thighs and part the damp folds hidden beneath.

Running a long finger from her pulsing nub down to the source of her wetness, he sank his finger into her eager body. Pulling back only long enough to add a second finger, he matched his rhythm to that of her fingers as they stoked his erection. Pressing her back against the window, he retook her lips with a possessive fury. The two began to move in tandem, grinding against their mate’s teasing fingers. Hungry for the taste of his mate, Elladan wrenched his mouth away from Azeriel’s and dropped to his knees between her wide spread legs.

A few teasing swipes of his tongue drew a strangled moan from her lips as she pushed upward trying to achieve greater contact. Refusing to give her what she demanded, he tightened his hold on her hips while keeping his touch light, tantalizing. Feeling her movements become more frantic, he was not surprised when her hands wrapped around his head and pulled him closer.

Groaning at her uninhibited response, he took her nub between his lips as he began to suckle and nibble on the swollen bit of flesh. Picking up the speed of his invading fingers, the dual assault on her senses was too much for Azeriel. With a breathy cry, her legs tightened around his shoulders as release swept through her.

Freeing himself from her legs, Elladan rose to his feet and moved completely between her thighs. Aligning himself to her opening, he thrust forward burying himself to the hilt in her trembling body. Pausing only long enough to claim her mouth, he set a demanding pace within her body. The caress of Azeriel’s legs around his waist and her arms encircling his neck pushed all other thoughts and feelings from his mind. He was aware of only the elleth he loved so completely, his mate, and the building, burning demand charging his senses.

The sudden grip of her body around his thrusting length and the moans of pleasure muffled by his mouth signed her second release. It also triggered his own. As his climax thundered through his body, a hoarse shout was torn from his throat as his hips snapped forward twice more before he sank into her embrace, his still pulsing shaft still buried fully in her quivering passage.

Several minutes passed with only the sound of harsh breathing breaking the silence of the bedchambers. His smile soft and lazy with contentment, Elladan lifted his head from the curve of her neck to study her face. Seeing her sated expression, he dropped his head to place a tender kiss on her lips.

“Amin mele lle, Azeriel, sii' ar' ilyamenie.“ Elladan whispered into her ear as he lifted her into his arms and began walking toward the bed. (I love you, Azeriel, now and always.)

“Amin mele lle vithel, Elladan. Lle ná amin coia!” she replied, pulling him down to lie beside her on their bed. (I love you too, Elladan. You are my life!)

*****

Glorfindel could feel the tension building in the room. Haldir stood next to a small table, struggling to remove the cork from the bottle of wine they had brought from the dining hall. Studying the elf as casually as possible, he was relieved to see that his Lorien was as nervous as he was. /He must be for I have never seen him so defeated by a mere cork before!/

Knowing it was best to get this unease settled quickly, he decided to take the risk of looking foolish in order to initiate an honest conversation. “Haldir? May I be honest with you about something?”

Startled by the sudden question, Haldir pushed too hard on the stubborn cork sending it plopping down into the top of the wine. /Ai! He regrets coming here. I must seem like a nervous virgin unable to open the wine and being so tentative in my actions./

Sighing, he turned to face the other elf trying to appear calm in the face of rejection from the only person to stir his heart so completely in all his life. “Yes, Glorfindel? Always feel you can speak freely with me. What troubles you?”

“Would you be offended if I suggest we take our time and get to know each other as perspective mates? I am very much interested in getting to know you better and would like to court you if you will allow it?” Blushing slightly, he added, “It has been a very long time since I have been involved with anyone. I have been alone too long to be able to rush this… even though I would like to in many ways.”

Looking into the sky blue eyes of his companion, he asked “Are you agreeable to a courtship?”

Seeing the truth of his confession in the depths of the indigo blue eyes, Haldir felt his nerves relax. A pleased smile came to his lips as he nodded his head. “Aye, I would like that too.”

Grinning, he teased, “I do not object to being courted if you do not object to my courting you in return.”

Laughing, Glorfindel rose to walk over to the grinning Lorien elf. “This sounds like an agreeable plan… provided any courting that involves opening a wine bottle falls under my purview. That… or I guess I will have to develop a liking for bits of cork floating in my wine!”

Enjoying the slight blush his words produced, Glorfindel leaned over to press a gentle kiss onto the lips of his new partner. Pulling back, he was pleased to note that Haldir’s breathing was slightly faster than it had been. /But then so is mine!/

Taking the bottle from Haldir’s hands, he turned to pour two glasses, smirking at the pieces of cork floating in both. Finding a spoon in a nearby drawer, he began fishing the bits from each glass. “So, tell me, how did today’s practice drills with the new recruits…”

*****

“…and the look on Ada’s face was priceless when Seere walked out of the dining hall after Adar’ra. He was beside himself! The look only got better when she returned with both him and Haldir!” Smiling as he spoke, Elrohir bent to press a kiss to the exposed skin at the back of Legolas’s neck. He had gathered all of the fine blonde hair and moved it to out of his way as he had been giving his love a massage before retiring for the night.

“I would love to know the joke behind the gift of the bottle of wine. The laugh Haldir and Glorfindel shared was most intriguing! Not to mention the grin Celeborn and Seere exchanged at their reaction. Do you suppose they would tell me if I asked?” Legolas’s voice was muffled as he spoke into the pillow of his crossed arms.

“Those two! You would stand a better chance of getting information out of Erestor!” Stopping to concentrate on a bundle of tight muscles between his lover’s shoulder blades, Elrohir could not prevent himself from grinning. “I also loved Seere’s answer to Ada ‘helping two blondes figure out why they keep crossing the road’!!”

Smirking at the glare directed at him by another blond, Elrohir placed another kiss on the back of the exposed neck. Enjoying the low moan of pleasure that produced, he again lowered his lips to that sensitive area and began to nibble a trail toward his lover’s exposed ear.

“Would you by chance be trying to seduce me, vanima peredhel nin?” the Prince inquired. (my beautiful half-elf)

“If you must ask, I must not be doing it right, mal- taren nin. I guess that means I must try harder!” That said, Elrohir moved to straddle Legolas’s hips so that he could rub his hardening length along the cleft of his lover’s buttocks. (my golden prince)

Laughing at Elrohir’s playful mood, Legolas began to arch his hips to meet the increasingly more urgent movements of his partner. Groaning in response to the added pressure, Elrohir lifted his body enough to urge this lover to turn over. Once he did, he leaned down to kiss the smiling lips of the elf beneath him.

Wrapping his arms around Elrohir, Legolas pulled his love down into his arms drawing his body out over his own. Each elf sighed in pleasure at the silky caress of the other’s body sliding along his own. Their hard members began to pulse with need as the pair began to rub their erections together.

Suddenly, Legolas arched his body and succeeded in rolling Elrohir beneath him. Grinning down into glittering silver-grey eyes, he said “You were getting a little too cocky for your own good, melme.” His grin became a laugh at Elrohir’s theatrical groan at his bad pun. “No fair! I laugh at your bad jokes!” (love)

Deciding to exact his revenge in pleasure, Legolas bent to once again kiss his lover. Sliding his hands down the smooth, sensitive skin of Elrohir’s sides, he reveled in the shudder of pleasure that shook Elrohir’s body. Breaking the kiss, he let his lips trail over the smooth skin of his lover’s jaw before following the path his hands had blazed down Elrohir’s broad, well-muscled chest.

After a few memorable minutes spent teasing the flesh of the peredhel’s neck and ears, he let his lips slide down to fasten over the taunt bud of Elrohir’s left nipple. There he proceeded to lick and nibble then sucking the bud into a throbbing cluster of raw nerves. Satisfied with his handiwork, he moved on to lavish similar attention to its mate.

Raising his head to study Elrohir’s face, Legolas felt his own arousal spiral higher at seeing the desire and love burning for him in his partner’s gaze. Moaning, the prince lowered his head and began to nibble and lick his way down the warm expanse of chest and abdomen before rising up on his kneels to slide in between Elrohir’s thighs.

Sitting back on his heels, he spread this lover’s thighs wide apart before pushing his knees back toward his chest. Gazing down into Elrohir’s eyes, he was once again stunned by his lover’s erotic and exotic beauty. Overwhelmed, he lowered his head to take Elrohir’s straining length into his mouth.

Licking the salty precum from the head, he licked along the crown drinking in the taste, as well as, the groans of pleasure spilling from Elrohir’s lips. Letting his tongue trace the shaft from root to tip, he slowly lowered his mouth over his lover’s turgid length and began to pleasure him with a gentle suckling, bobbing motion.

Feeling himself nearing his release, Elrohir reached down to ease his lover’s mouth from his pulsing member. “Please, meleth nîn… stop! I need you in me! Please take me now!” (my love)

Spurred on by Elrohir’s words and his own need, Legolas lifted his head looking for the vial of oil they had been using earlier for his massage. Finding it, he urged Elrohir’s knees further back and apart. Satisfied, he moved closer to his lover’s body as his fingers opened the vial so the oil could pour our over into his palm.

Coating several fingers with the slippery substance, he reached down to rub the oil at Elrohir’s tight opening. Applying a little pressure to encourage the ring to open, he slipped his finger into the tight, hot passage. Feeling the shudder move through Elrohir’s body, Legolas slowly let his finger slide deeper. Pulling it back, he pushed a second finger in beside the first and let the two digits spread the oil along the walls of the clinging channel.

As the tightness began to ease, he angled his fingers seeking Elrohir’s prostate. The caress of the oiled fingers, the teasing of a fingernail over the sensitive gland, caused wild sparks of pleasure to fire through his lover’s body. Moaning, Elrohir arched up to meet the probing fingers seeking harder contact against his pleasure spot.

Knowing this was the sign his lover was ready to be taken, Legolas pulled his fingers from the clutching passage causing Elrohir to cry out at their sudden loss. Moving quickly, he settled his thighs tight against the base of Elrohir’s spine and positioned his erection at the prepared opening. Slicking his oily palm down his length, he gripped his love’s hips to steady him while he slowly pushed into the yielding channel.

Once he was in completely, he stopped for a moment to let Elrohir adjust to his large member. Pulling almost all the way out, Legolas thrust back into Elrohir’s body in a smooth, hard stroke butting his love’s prostate in the process. This set their rhythm as Legolas took his lover with a series of hard, deep thrusts.

Grabbing his own weeping length, Elrohir began to pump his shaft in time with his lover’s possession of his body. The battering of his prostate and the deep, steady pounding of his passage overwhelmed Elrohir. Crying out as his release overtook him, his hand slide rapidly up and down his shaft as his seed spilt onto his chest.

Elrohir’s intense release caused the muscles in his already tight channel to clinch and spasm. The added stimulation was too much for Legolas. His hard thrusts continued for several moments as he found release deep within Elrohir’s trembling body.

Collapsing onto his lover, they struggled to catch their breath in the wake of their intense release. Elrohir reached up to smooth the hair away from Legolas’s face before drawing his lips to meet his own. “Amin mela lle, Lirimaer.” (I love you, lovely one.)

“Amin mela lle vithel, Elrohir.” (I love you also,Elrohir.)
*****

Elrond felt the tension of the day melt away as Seere settled more comfortably against his side. Turning his head from the study of fire, he bent his head to place a gentle kiss on her soft lips. Already dreaming of the day when they would be free to fully express their growing love, he was content for now to have her back in his arms and all to himself… at least, until it was time for her to return to her chambers for the night. Breaking the kiss before it could deepen out of control, Elrond lifted his head and smiled down into the face of his dreams.

*****

Lindon, Second Age 1529

The party from Greenwood disappeared through the main gate of Lindon. Their king rode at the head of the column, his eyes fixed ahead and his shoulders set in a rigid line. The High King fought the urge to call out to him... to offer apologies and regret. Knowing there was little he could say that would make any difference, Ereinion clamped his lips closed.

He remained on the palace steps only long enough to see Oropher’s final exit from his city. Turning on his heel, Ereinion strode back into the palace intent upon finding the peace and solitude of his study as quickly as he could. His face was fixed in a hard mask that gave but few clues to his inner turmoil. Heedless of the milling crowd making their way to and from the main dining hall, he ignored the greetings and calls for his attention. The duties of kingship were ignored as the weight of personal guilt pulled at his fëa.

He knew his abrupt behavior would draw unwanted attention, but he was too distressed… too off-balance to care overmuch. He needed some time alone to gather his scattered thoughts and put a tight lid on his emotions. /They must think I nurse a broken heart. Better that I guess than for any to know my guilt in this matter… and my relief./

With an imperious wave of his hand, he dismissed the small crowd of advisors, scribes, and retainers that had crowed into the antechamber to his study to await his arrival. “I have urgent matters to attend. Nomin, see that I am not disturbed for any reason.” The King made brief eye contact with his personal scribe to reinforce his edict before closing the door to his study behind him. (wisdom --- seems a good name for a scribe)

For several long minutes, he leaned weakly against the door, his strength leaving him now that he was alone. With a muffled groan, he pushed himself away from its support and began to walk toward his desk. Half way across the room his steps veered to the right in the direction of a table in the far corner which contained several cut-glass decanters, each one etched with delicate elven motifs.

Uncaring of his choice, he randomly selected a bottle and poured a generous measure of Dwarvian brandy into a waiting crystal glass. Downing the brandy without tasting the potent liqueur, he refilled his glass before turning back toward his desk. The decanter was still clinched in one hand.

Dropping into his chair, he made short work of his second glass of brandy. After pouring a third, he leaned wearily back in his chair. /How did it come to this? How did I let this situation get so badly out of hand?/

Ereinion let the painful scene of the night before repeat itself behind his closed eyes. He had known for some time that Oropher was becoming increasingly unhappy… angry and resentful. His lover had stopped coming to his chambers unless actively encouraged. The King had found his desire to encourage the Silvan’s company had long since waned and they had spent but a few nights together in the past year. In some ways, this had been a relief for Ereinion, but it still confused him. Last night had been the first time he had made the effort to seek Oropher’s company in several months.

In retrospect, he blamed himself for taking so little regard for the other elf’s feelings. He had failed to take much notice in the increasingly bitter and vicious quality of his lover’s comments. It had been some time since Ereinion had responded to anything other than another groundless attack on his herald. Elrond did not have to be present to draw the ire of Greenwood’s leader. His very existence seemed to be all that was required to unhinge the elf. This loss of self-control had gone unchallenged beyond the king’s heated defense of the peredhel.

/I have known for quite some time our arrangement no longer satisfied Oropher, but I never asked why. He has long been on edge and lashing out at anyone caught too close to his barbed tongue. When did a casual affair become so complicated? How did I fail to see he had fallen in love with me? Or that my indifference hurt him so deeply? I took him to my bed when it pleased me, but ignored him otherwise./

Downing his third glass of brandy, he sat staring into the empty crystal seeking, but finding no answers to excuse his behavior. /When Oropher came to court so long ago, he was still grieving the loss of his wife. He deeply loved her. His pain and loss gave him a… fragile air. He was so beautiful and I have always had a weakness for beauty./

Raking angry fingers through his tussled hair, he forced himself to face his mistakes. /I should have seen it was folly to take someone so vulnerable to my bed… especially one whose good will we will need to maintain any alliance against Sauron. Celeborn warned me… I am not likely to forget his uncharacteristically crude assessment…“thinking with my cock” I believe he called it, but I failed to heed his advice. I never meant to hurt Oropher, but I could not lie and pretend I had feelings for him that I do not. I was… am fond of him, but I never deluded myself… or him for that matter that I loved him. Or did I?/

Plunking his empty glass down hard onto his desk, he poured another drink. The heady rush of the first three was beginning to numb his thoughts and he wanted to aid their progress. Taking another sip, the bitter accusations flung at him the night before echoed in his head.

“I love you. Am I not enough for you, oh great king? What can he offer you that I cannot?” demanded the golden-haired elf.

Startled, Ereinion had professed his confusion over his lover’s words. “He? Who is this he of whom you speak? I tell you there is no other he. I have not had a lover save for you in years, Oropher.”

A bitter laugh had followed in response to his protests. “Then you are the only one not to know of whom I speak… to see what is so obvious to everyone else. Wait… I take that back for the object of your love and desire is equally oblivious. You make a perfect pair!”

“Who is it you think I love? I am not in love with anyone…” Too late he realized how telling his response had been. He saw the pain explode in the pale green eyes of the King of Greenwood. “Oropher…”

“Nay, do not bother. You made me no promises… have offered no declarations of love, so you owe me nothing. That has been true since I first came to your bed and I cannot claim to have been mislead.” His head held high, the Silvan elf turned toward the door.

Over his shoulder he continued. “I have made plans to leave on the morrow. Had you not invited me to join you, I would have broken my own rule and paid you a call to inform you of my intent. I will not be returning. I have neglected my duties long enough and have left the burdens of my office for too long on the shoulders of my son.”

“Oropher…? Please… can we not talk. I never meant to hurt…” Ereinion began.

Rounding back on his former lover, Oropher faced him with eyes blazing. “Talk?! I think it is well past that time, my king. You have not found the time to talk with me in almost ten years so do not think I can be placated in one night… the eve of my leaving.”

Sneering at the obvious confusion of the face of the Noldor, he taunted “No, I will leave you to pine away another night for your mongrel. I will not wait around watching this farce any longer. I have stayed too long as it is. I let myself forget you are a Noldor. Perhaps one such as he is a more suitable mate for a kinslayer!”

/Mongrel? What did he mean by that? I have often heard him refer to Elrond in that matter… it was one of the few things I ever got truly mad at him about. How did he come to this insane belief I ‘pine’ for Elrond? His anger has truly unhinged his mind for him to think thus. I have never made any advances in that direction, beautiful though Elrond is. I regret my failure for not seeing what was happening to Oropher… for taking appropriate action to support my lover. He has become paranoid and delusional if he thinks there is something going on between Elrond and myself./

Draining the last of his brandy, he let the glass tumble from his hands onto the rug under his desk. Exhausted from the lack of sleep the night before… for many nights before, he cradled his head in his arms on the top of the desk. Within minutes, he had drifted into an uneasy sleep… sleep filled with images he was not yet able to acknowledge… images of a beautiful face lit by silver eyes and framed by thick dark hair. A soft moan of desire slipped from his throat.

*****

A/N --- * Yes, I know this is not canon, but from Peter Jackson’s scripts. I considered this matter seriously before I decided to use the movie’s plot of having the elves at Helm’s Deep. To put it simply, it worked better for my story for Haldir to be reborn from his death in the battle and for Elrond/Galadriel to have aided Rohan. The reasons for my decision will become clear as the story continues.