Lord Of The Rings Parody
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-Multi-Age › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
14
Views:
1,388
Reviews:
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Currently Reading:
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Category:
-Multi-Age › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
14
Views:
1,388
Reviews:
0
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Parody 4
Legolas:Gandalf laughs and steps over the fence walks up the path and whacks his staff on the door. From inside you hear a gun cock.”Who is it?” Says a voice sounding very sweet.
Gandalf: Its your old Handsome Friend Gandalf!
Bilbo: ( peeks out the door and sighs) Oh Good I thought you where those annoying ShakeVillbaggines I swear I see another one I’ll shot um come on in though your welcome, Again thank the valar its you I don’t want to have to shot someone before my birthday party! They are driving me crazy
Gandalf : (ducks in the door and Bilbo shuts and locks it behind him Gandalf takes Bilbo’s Gun )
Bilbo: Hey give me that back!
Gandalf: No you might hurt yourself or Shot Frodo you don’t know how to use one and I can see your clearly Crazy now lets sit down and have a nice tea.
(Legolas: Gandalf tries not to make any sudden moves so he won’t crake his head! He did look very large in the hobbit hole Bilbo pouts then they go and have a lovely talk and tea. Though he did try and get the gun back from Gandalf when the SackvilleBaggines again knocked on the door. Gandalf wouldn’t let Bilbo shot them cause Gandalf was also crazy but not that crazy! )
Bilbo: I think I spread too much butter on my toast!
Gandalf: I would say so are you going to fallow throw with your plans to go to The Rivendell Retirement Village?
Bilbo: Yes and it’s not a Retirement Village it’s the Home of Elrond Halfelven and I need somewhere quite where I can finishes My Book! Frodo is always bringing his noisy cousins and friends over I mean I love the Kid but he is also driving me insane I have to get away! I’m leaving him everything!
Gandalf: yes that will be best
Bilbo: Yes its time Frodo started looking after himself he is of age now though I pray he won’t look after himself off a cliff that lad is accident-prone but if Sam is around maybe he will be all right. He gets his clumsiness from The Took Side I would think.
Gandalf: I wouldn’t doubt it my friend, say lets have a smoke tell the party Hey?
Bilbo: I like your thinking! (So they both sit outside and get very high and Gandalf blows lots of shapes in his smoke rings amusing the both of them) Gandalf my old Friend this will be a night to remember!
(Legolas: All right Time for a Brake! Before my hand falls off!
(Puts up a sign Gone to Luncheon Be back in 5 hours thanks Legolas) Merry To Pippin: We are never going to get into this film! (Says from there spots in the Party Scene)
No wonder Legolas wasn't in The Movies Much he was always Late or took to Long! Is shot with an arrow for her commint THINKS SOMEONE IS ARROW HAPPY!)
Legolas: ( FINALLY! Comes Back it is now 5:55pm the next evening) “Wow that sure was a nice brake so what was I doing? ( Merry and Pippin can’t be found anywhere)
Gimli: ( rolls eyes) Telling the LOTR if you forget again I’ll……. ( He stops as Legolas causally strings a arrow to his bow and points it at Gimli)
Legolas: You’ll what?
Gimli: Sit quietly tell my scene ( says flouding his hands in his lap)
Legolas: That’s what I thought ( leans back on his chair and begins to go on) SO Suddenly out of no where there is BIG Fireworks crashing suddenly and Gandalf and Bilbo are both at the party suddenly and there is music and dancing Hobbits doing there Hobbit jig and some hobbits trying to dance. Somewhere playing banjoes and drums. Hey get that electric guitar out of here this is Middle Earth for gosh sakes!
E Guitar Player: Hey it rocks Man peace out! ( throws up a peace sign)
Legolas: I said get it out! ( shots an arrow over his head just barely missing him)
EGP: Ok Ok! Sheesh chill! (he leaves)
Legolas: SO The party goes on happily and we come to Sam who is nervously drinking an ale while Rosie dances around behind him trying to get his attention after Frodo did his dance he came over and sat with Sam He laughs
Frodo: Well this party couldn’t be any better huh Sam exsapt that my Birthday could have been at lest mentioned I mean come on I’m turning 33 here this is a BIG deal right? I mean J.R.R Tolkien at lest said something about it you know.”
Sam: I think I’ll go have another ale Mr. Frodo...........
Frodo: ( grabs Sam by the shirt collar) OH No you don’t Mr. Sam! You have had enough Ale why don’t you go dance it off with that Rosie lass I know you have it so bad for.
Sam: Oh I don’t know Mr. Frodo what if she thinks I’m Fat?
Frodo: Your not Fat your gifted in the Middle now go! ( shoves Sam into the dancing twirling worling Rosie who sweeps him away)
Sam: Ouch my foot (Rosie giggles)
Frodo: ( Laughs at this sitting down )
Legolas: OK whose feet are smelling Like Corn Chips! Who took off there Boots I’m dieing here I think I lost all my nose hairs from that stink!( Sees Aragron sitting with his feet on the table)..........
Aragron: Hey you try walking around in your boots bear foot and see how your feet smell!
Legolas: No thanks I’ll pass on that Aragron I don’t go around trying to make myself stink go wash your feet child it makes me Ill!
Aragron: You can’t tell me what to do your not my boss! I’m older then you anyways!
Legolas: You wish Stinky feet Lad now be out of my sent range before I shoot you! ( Aragron can’t think of anything else to say so he gets up and goes and acts like he is going to the bathroom he’ll show Legolas how stinky he can be) Anyways So Bilbo and Frodo are hiding from The Shackvillbaggines Bilbo shows Frodo the little handgun in his breast pocket but Frodo Takes it from him
Bilbo: Hey give it here that’s my gun!
Frodo: No there are NO Guns in Middle Earth Bilbo now quit with the guns its annoying me and everyone else I think well me anyways ( Frodo puts the Gun out of Bilbo’s reach)
Bilbo: bratty Lad I can’t wait to get away from him! ( he mutters)
Frodo: Bilbo I’m right here you know.
Bilbo: so I’m going to go drink some Gaffers home brew good stuff my lad ( he goes and gets his ale) We then come to the scene with a chart full of fireworks Gandalf takes a couple laughing insanely cause he loves fire and he loves to play with it. (Waits for about 5 minutes no Merry or Pippin)
( Legolas: Where is Merry and Pippin?! ) ( Then a door off set flies open Merry and Pippin run in)
Merry: Sorry we got lost.
Pippin: Yeah in the Fangorn Forest set!
Merry: Plus we waited so long for you Legolas!
Pippin: We just had to wonder off I mean come on what do you exsapt No More 5 hour brakes!
Legolas: Ok Ok No more but please stop finishing each other’s sentences
Merry: Sorry Pippin: about that! Legolas: Yeah me to now get in your places! ( Merry and Pippin get in there places and they pop up looking around for Gandalf who is still happily playing with the fireworks laughing and having an amusing time with himself. )
Pippin: Merry give me a boost! ( Merry links his fingers together and pushes Pippin on to the chart and Pippin picks up a lil blue one)
Merry: Come on get the big Dragon head and hurry before Gandalf comes back! ( Pippin dose as Merry says and leaps down with it but as he is running he catches his neck on the tent line and falls back words knocking into Merry who had just gone to bite the apple Merry fell to the ground and Pippin fell on top of him and the firework landed on top of Pippin)
Gandalf: ( comes back he frowns and dose this brissly thing with his eye brows they look like caterpillars with Mohawks)
Pippin: whispers to Merry I think his eyebrows are alive Merry. Merry: You think so? Gandalf: Merry Brandybuck and Peregrin Took I might have known
Merry: ( thinking quick) you don’t know nothing you never saw us its only a dream! ( pushes Pippin up runs away with him and the firework)
Gandalf: Hmmmm I hope for there sake this better be!
(Legolas: Hmm I’m tired I think I’ll take another Brake Yawns!)
(Merry&Pippin: WHAT!!!! That is sooo not right!)
(Legolas: I’ll go on after I have a nice sleep Ok! Tell then you can wonder if Gandalf will do anything to you or not have a nice night ( walks away)
( Merry: I think I’m going to kill him
Pippin: good luck he is one hard elf to kill I bet? Why don’t we tell the story)?
(Merry: Nah to Much work Lets go find a Pub to knock over
Pippin: Can we really knock it over?
Merry: sigh Just come with me (takes Pippin and they go find a Pub and the Party scene Freezes)
Gandalf: Its your old Handsome Friend Gandalf!
Bilbo: ( peeks out the door and sighs) Oh Good I thought you where those annoying ShakeVillbaggines I swear I see another one I’ll shot um come on in though your welcome, Again thank the valar its you I don’t want to have to shot someone before my birthday party! They are driving me crazy
Gandalf : (ducks in the door and Bilbo shuts and locks it behind him Gandalf takes Bilbo’s Gun )
Bilbo: Hey give me that back!
Gandalf: No you might hurt yourself or Shot Frodo you don’t know how to use one and I can see your clearly Crazy now lets sit down and have a nice tea.
(Legolas: Gandalf tries not to make any sudden moves so he won’t crake his head! He did look very large in the hobbit hole Bilbo pouts then they go and have a lovely talk and tea. Though he did try and get the gun back from Gandalf when the SackvilleBaggines again knocked on the door. Gandalf wouldn’t let Bilbo shot them cause Gandalf was also crazy but not that crazy! )
Bilbo: I think I spread too much butter on my toast!
Gandalf: I would say so are you going to fallow throw with your plans to go to The Rivendell Retirement Village?
Bilbo: Yes and it’s not a Retirement Village it’s the Home of Elrond Halfelven and I need somewhere quite where I can finishes My Book! Frodo is always bringing his noisy cousins and friends over I mean I love the Kid but he is also driving me insane I have to get away! I’m leaving him everything!
Gandalf: yes that will be best
Bilbo: Yes its time Frodo started looking after himself he is of age now though I pray he won’t look after himself off a cliff that lad is accident-prone but if Sam is around maybe he will be all right. He gets his clumsiness from The Took Side I would think.
Gandalf: I wouldn’t doubt it my friend, say lets have a smoke tell the party Hey?
Bilbo: I like your thinking! (So they both sit outside and get very high and Gandalf blows lots of shapes in his smoke rings amusing the both of them) Gandalf my old Friend this will be a night to remember!
(Legolas: All right Time for a Brake! Before my hand falls off!
(Puts up a sign Gone to Luncheon Be back in 5 hours thanks Legolas) Merry To Pippin: We are never going to get into this film! (Says from there spots in the Party Scene)
No wonder Legolas wasn't in The Movies Much he was always Late or took to Long! Is shot with an arrow for her commint THINKS SOMEONE IS ARROW HAPPY!)
Legolas: ( FINALLY! Comes Back it is now 5:55pm the next evening) “Wow that sure was a nice brake so what was I doing? ( Merry and Pippin can’t be found anywhere)
Gimli: ( rolls eyes) Telling the LOTR if you forget again I’ll……. ( He stops as Legolas causally strings a arrow to his bow and points it at Gimli)
Legolas: You’ll what?
Gimli: Sit quietly tell my scene ( says flouding his hands in his lap)
Legolas: That’s what I thought ( leans back on his chair and begins to go on) SO Suddenly out of no where there is BIG Fireworks crashing suddenly and Gandalf and Bilbo are both at the party suddenly and there is music and dancing Hobbits doing there Hobbit jig and some hobbits trying to dance. Somewhere playing banjoes and drums. Hey get that electric guitar out of here this is Middle Earth for gosh sakes!
E Guitar Player: Hey it rocks Man peace out! ( throws up a peace sign)
Legolas: I said get it out! ( shots an arrow over his head just barely missing him)
EGP: Ok Ok! Sheesh chill! (he leaves)
Legolas: SO The party goes on happily and we come to Sam who is nervously drinking an ale while Rosie dances around behind him trying to get his attention after Frodo did his dance he came over and sat with Sam He laughs
Frodo: Well this party couldn’t be any better huh Sam exsapt that my Birthday could have been at lest mentioned I mean come on I’m turning 33 here this is a BIG deal right? I mean J.R.R Tolkien at lest said something about it you know.”
Sam: I think I’ll go have another ale Mr. Frodo...........
Frodo: ( grabs Sam by the shirt collar) OH No you don’t Mr. Sam! You have had enough Ale why don’t you go dance it off with that Rosie lass I know you have it so bad for.
Sam: Oh I don’t know Mr. Frodo what if she thinks I’m Fat?
Frodo: Your not Fat your gifted in the Middle now go! ( shoves Sam into the dancing twirling worling Rosie who sweeps him away)
Sam: Ouch my foot (Rosie giggles)
Frodo: ( Laughs at this sitting down )
Legolas: OK whose feet are smelling Like Corn Chips! Who took off there Boots I’m dieing here I think I lost all my nose hairs from that stink!( Sees Aragron sitting with his feet on the table)..........
Aragron: Hey you try walking around in your boots bear foot and see how your feet smell!
Legolas: No thanks I’ll pass on that Aragron I don’t go around trying to make myself stink go wash your feet child it makes me Ill!
Aragron: You can’t tell me what to do your not my boss! I’m older then you anyways!
Legolas: You wish Stinky feet Lad now be out of my sent range before I shoot you! ( Aragron can’t think of anything else to say so he gets up and goes and acts like he is going to the bathroom he’ll show Legolas how stinky he can be) Anyways So Bilbo and Frodo are hiding from The Shackvillbaggines Bilbo shows Frodo the little handgun in his breast pocket but Frodo Takes it from him
Bilbo: Hey give it here that’s my gun!
Frodo: No there are NO Guns in Middle Earth Bilbo now quit with the guns its annoying me and everyone else I think well me anyways ( Frodo puts the Gun out of Bilbo’s reach)
Bilbo: bratty Lad I can’t wait to get away from him! ( he mutters)
Frodo: Bilbo I’m right here you know.
Bilbo: so I’m going to go drink some Gaffers home brew good stuff my lad ( he goes and gets his ale) We then come to the scene with a chart full of fireworks Gandalf takes a couple laughing insanely cause he loves fire and he loves to play with it. (Waits for about 5 minutes no Merry or Pippin)
( Legolas: Where is Merry and Pippin?! ) ( Then a door off set flies open Merry and Pippin run in)
Merry: Sorry we got lost.
Pippin: Yeah in the Fangorn Forest set!
Merry: Plus we waited so long for you Legolas!
Pippin: We just had to wonder off I mean come on what do you exsapt No More 5 hour brakes!
Legolas: Ok Ok No more but please stop finishing each other’s sentences
Merry: Sorry Pippin: about that! Legolas: Yeah me to now get in your places! ( Merry and Pippin get in there places and they pop up looking around for Gandalf who is still happily playing with the fireworks laughing and having an amusing time with himself. )
Pippin: Merry give me a boost! ( Merry links his fingers together and pushes Pippin on to the chart and Pippin picks up a lil blue one)
Merry: Come on get the big Dragon head and hurry before Gandalf comes back! ( Pippin dose as Merry says and leaps down with it but as he is running he catches his neck on the tent line and falls back words knocking into Merry who had just gone to bite the apple Merry fell to the ground and Pippin fell on top of him and the firework landed on top of Pippin)
Gandalf: ( comes back he frowns and dose this brissly thing with his eye brows they look like caterpillars with Mohawks)
Pippin: whispers to Merry I think his eyebrows are alive Merry. Merry: You think so? Gandalf: Merry Brandybuck and Peregrin Took I might have known
Merry: ( thinking quick) you don’t know nothing you never saw us its only a dream! ( pushes Pippin up runs away with him and the firework)
Gandalf: Hmmmm I hope for there sake this better be!
(Legolas: Hmm I’m tired I think I’ll take another Brake Yawns!)
(Merry&Pippin: WHAT!!!! That is sooo not right!)
(Legolas: I’ll go on after I have a nice sleep Ok! Tell then you can wonder if Gandalf will do anything to you or not have a nice night ( walks away)
( Merry: I think I’m going to kill him
Pippin: good luck he is one hard elf to kill I bet? Why don’t we tell the story)?
(Merry: Nah to Much work Lets go find a Pub to knock over
Pippin: Can we really knock it over?
Merry: sigh Just come with me (takes Pippin and they go find a Pub and the Party scene Freezes)