Against all odds

Chapter thirty-six morning brings trouble

He groaned when the sun entered his eyes and, not wanting to fully awaken, he rolled onto his other side and immediately bumped into another’s body. Curious he opened his eyes and was temporarily stunned to see Legolas in his bed.
His obliviousness ended a second later when he remembered last week’s events. Every time when he awoke he was surprised to see the blond. And it never lasted long.

He smiled at the Prince’s beauty and sighed lovingly. He wanted that body, he wanted them to be fully together but he had never instigated anything more than caresses and kisses. On occasions he would go further and actually touch Legolas’ member, but he kept those times to a minimum. He knew they could not get intimate like that. If he did that he would die for sure.
Elrohir knew that even though Legolas might be sincere in his emotions, he could never keep his promise. The blond would leave him and Elrohir knew that. He had tried to address it but Legolas had merely kissed his fears away or made him laugh again, thinking it was nothing but a false fear or insecurity.

Legolas understood Elrohir had a lot to work through and needed to take this slow and he was more than willing to do just that. But Elrohir’s words hadn’t been spoken out of fear or insecurity, but out of knowledge. For the Peredhel knew Thranduil would never approve of their relationship and would forbid it and end it any way he could.
Elrohir did not fear for Legolas, for he knew the blond was strong enough, but he did fear for himself. If they became intimate he would lose his heart to Legolas completely and his fate would be sealed. He didn’t voice it, knowing Legolas would only disagree with him.

Pressing a loving kiss to the face he loved he nestled himself back into Legolas’ arms and easily went back to sleep.

The sensation of a caress being bestowed upon him and the growing amount of light touching Legolas’ face brought awareness back into the blue orbs.
He looked down at his charge and shook his head when he realised Elrohir was asleep again. /It’s amazing how fast he can go back to sleep./

He carefully disentangled hif anf and rose from the bed. Before going anywhere else he drew the curtains close, making sure the rising sun wouldn’t interfere Elrohir’s sleep. And then he silently dressed himself and left the room. He still hadn’t had time to speak to Elrond and now that he finally had a moment he decided to do it now, even if it meant interrupting Elrond and Erestor. With a determined stride he marched to Elrond’s new rooms, which the two lovers had taken as their own some days ago.

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Elrond woke when he no longer sensed a presence next to him. His eyes frantically searched the room and finally rested upon Erestor’s back.

The other elf had managed to leave the bed and drag a rocking chair to the patio without waking Elrond. He now sat in it, slowly rocking it, and gazed up at the stars. He never thought he could love the view anymore, but now he did. He had found his peace and he owed it all to Elrond. /My world now revolves around you./
Erestor chuckled at his thought. /It always has./
He knew he was still healing for he felt rather chilly but the image was so beautiful he was reluctant to leave and fetch a blanket. He startled when one was draped around him. He relaxed when he saw Elrond kneeling next to him.

“Your absence woke me. Why are you sitting here?”
Erestor smiled and returned to his gazing. “Because it’s lovely. And because I never thought I would feel like this again. Thank you.”
Elrond shook his head. “I did nothing. You’re the warrior and the fighter. Not I. I’ve never been one.” Erestor’s head snapped back with an alarming rate. His eyes spoke volumes. Elrond shrugged. “Let me rephrase that: I was never a good warrior, nor a successful one.”

Erestor narrowed his eyes and cocked his head, a sign he wasn’t buying the tale that was told. And yet, he read nothing but sincerity in Elrond’s eyes. Focusing on the link between them his eyes involuntarily widened when he felt Elrond’s guilt and pain.
Acting instinctively he kneeled beside his lover and cupped his face, staring him in the eyes. “Listen to me. You were not to blame. Every one made their own choice and nothing you could not have done would have changed the outcome. Please stop blaming yourself for his death.”
Elrond closed his eyes. His mind told him Erestor was right, and even his heart, but his soul refused to believe so. Erestor did not give up yet. “He knew he would, Elrond, or else he would not have given you Vilya when he did.”
He saw he was losing Elrond to the shadows of the past. /How long has this been going on? And I never noticed./ “Elrond, please, you have to fight this. Stay with me. I need you. I’m nothing without you.”

Suddenly he knew what Elrond needed to hear and he gently shook him to get his attention. “Listen, you call me a warrior, but you are so much more. -You- have saved me from going to Mandos’ halls. -You- alone called me back. Elrond, -you- alone have kept me alive and -you- have been my strength the last weeks.
“Elrond, you’ve founded Imladris. And the two of you are the same. You both are beautiful, caring, compassionate and loving. Fragile, for the defences are easily penetrated and yet unbreakably strong, and retaliation is always swift.
“You once asked me if I knew what I did to you and now I ask you the same question. You have saved me, more than you can ever imagine, maybe more than you’ll ever realise. Elrond, I no longer feel stained or dirty. No longer do I see their faces or feel their hands over my body. -You- have replaced them. You; with your kindness, your patience, your determination, and your will, your strength, your generosity and your love. You call me your warrior, I call you my sanctuary.”
He saw Elrond’s eyes had filled with tears and slowly the pain and guilt were replaced by hope and gratitude. And disbelief. Erestor grinned. “I mean it, Elrond. Or rather: Ahëa yánanya”
Elrond smiled lovingly at him. “You are a warrior, Erestor. You fought the shadows when it tried to consume me just now.” Erestor shook his head. “Nay, you did that yourself. I merely showed the way. And don’t you ever stop fighting, for I would be lost without you. Hold me?”

Elrond nodded and rose himself, settling on the rocking chair signalling for Erestor to settle down on his lap. When Erestor was comfortably settled he draped them both with the blanket. “I can deny you nothing.” Erestor’s smile widened and Elrond expected an exploitation but instead Erestor dryly stated: “Then kiss me.” He happily did so.
“There are still some hours left in the night. Do you wish to stay here?” Erestor nodded and rested his head against Elrond’s chest. “If you don’t mind.”

Elrond yawned and shook his head, making his hair caress Erestor’s face. He grinned when he hear the purr and smiled dotingly at the elf on his lap. “I do not. I might prefer this to you tossing and turning all night and stealing the blankets.” He felt a disapproving poke in his side and grinned. “Did I mention the snoring? I do believe you could wake a Dwarf with that, my dear. Though I should probably warn the poor creature to keep his axe far away because of your tendency to fight at night.”
“Elrond! Shut up and go to sleep.”
Elrond planted a kiss on his hair. “Anything you wish.”

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He groaned when he heard a knock upon his door. Irritated he turned around and smiled when that action brought him face to face with his beloved. Even though their wedding was months away Elladan had not wasted time by moving into his rooms.
Lindir knew better than to argue with the Peredhel and had allowed him. He had felt cornered and afraid at first. They weren’t wed yet and Lindir wanted to wait. But Elladan had never done more than caress him and slowly Lindir’s trust and faith in him grew.
And he found he enjoyed having Elladan this close, feeling his arms around him when he went to sleep or when he woke. It made him feel loved and cherished. A feeling he hadn’t had since his childhood. As soon as he had learned the truth about the herbs he had felt betrayed by his parents.

Lindir forced those gloomy thoughts away from his mind and focused on Elladan’s face. No matter what he wore, where he was or what he did he would always look incredibly beautiful to him. He smiled and leaned in closer to brush his lips to Elladan’s forehead. “I can’t wait until we’re wed and we can make love.”

Another knock entered his hearing and he reluctantly left his bed to head for the door. Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw and he couldn’t stop his shocked cry from leaving his mouth. All colour faded from his face as he staggered backwards, his eyes fixed on the door in disbelief.

Only a second later Elladan emerged at his side, his eyes filled with worry and concern. Lindir felt as if he had just been thrown in a whirling river and was quickly losing his composure. Finding Elladan by his side relieved him somewhat and he fell against his beloved’s body, holding on for dear life.
This fuelled Elladan’s concern and he looked around, wondering what had upset his lover so. Looking at the door he saw two strange elves, though he had the unpleasant fleeing he should know one of them.

The male was now quickly approaching them. “Lindir, calm yourself. We meant not to frighten you, but we couldn’t wait to see you. We came as soon as we heard the news. Lindir, why did you not write you were about to wed?”
Now the stranger hit himself over the head. “Hello there, you must be one of his friends. Of course, I recognize you now. Elladan or Elrohir. Would you give us some moments alone with our son? What joyous news indeed.”
Uncaring about the results he pulled Lindir into a tight hug. He knew Lindir never wanted any attention from them and blamed him for not stopping his mother eating the herbs, but that had only fuelled his attempts to show his love, care and affection. He knew Lindir would calm down soon.

Elladan realised he should leave and inclined his head. He was glad they were here. Lindir needed them here, even if he told everybody he didn’t. He decided to pay his brother a visit. Maybe he could tease him with Legolas. But suddenly the air was knocked from him and he fell to the ground in antagonizing speed.

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Elrond blinked his eyes open at the knocking sound. The view at the sky told him they had indeed slept some more hours, but now someone had interrupted their peace. One look told him Erestor was still sound asleep and he was not going to wake him. He didn’t have any problems with anyone seeing this so he softly called the visitor to enter. He smiled when he saw it was Legolas.

The blond swiftly and silently approached, returning the smile. “Forgive me for interrupting, but there’s something I would like to talk about.” He kept his voice to a mere whisper. Elrond nodded. Normally he would have asked Legolas to come back later but there was some hint of urgency in his voice that made Elrond incline his head, silently telling Legolas to continue.

After swallowing he started. “It’s about Elrohir. I don’t know what to do anymore. He’s still afraid of losing me and I don’t know how I can convince him I wont desert him.”
Elrond raised his eyebrow. “He’s told you of his fears?”
Legolas nodded. “Aye, some days after I had first arrived. Not about this though. I think he’s afraid I will leave the second he mentions it.”
Elrond nodded. “So you stay close instead. Makes sense. He’s fragile, Legolas, and needs time.”
Legolas shook his head. “I’m happy to give him that, but I’ve got the feelings there’s something else behind this. I see desire in his eyes and yet he holds back and not out of fear. No, there’s something else.”
Elrond frowned. “I don’t like the sound of this. And I’m afraid I can’t be of much help to you, Legolas. Even though they’re my sons, at times like this I feel I know nothing about them.” “O but you do, Yánanya.”

Erestor smiled when both other elves looked at him in confusion. “Just think for a moment. What’s Elrohir’s greatest fear?”
Elrond shrugged. “That the ones he loves will leave him.”
Legolas shook his head. “No, Elrond, his greatest fear is that he won’t be able to stop them.” Elrond closed his eyes at his own ignorance. “Of course. Celebrían.” He felt Erestor’s nod at his chest. Erestor’s previous words made him realise there was a connection between this and what had happened to Celebrían. He just didn’t see it.

A sudden knock at the door turned their heads into the direction of the already opening door. Elrond grinned, already knowing who it was. Only Glorfindel would do that. They twins did so too but after he and Erestor had gotten together they waited for the permission. Elrond smiled. The idea of walking in on their father must be terrifying to them.

Glorfindel smiled at them. “Ah, Legolas, I thought you might be here after I found Elrohir alone. Don’t worry; I didn’t wake him. This letter arrived for you.”

Legolas recognised his father’s seal and grabbed it from Glorfindel, drawing a chuckle from the ancient warrior. He opened it and greedily read its contends. Unable to believe the words he read them again and then his lips twisted into the biggest smile ever. Unable to hold his happiness to himself he hugged the other blond and then turned his gaze to Elrond and Erestor. “Father wrote they’ve found him. Dead. It’s safe for me to go home.”

Elrond and Glorfindel congratulated him but Erestor narrowed his eyes. “So what happens now, Legolas Thranduilion?” golagolas didn’t catch the hint of menace and answered joyfully. “I’m going home. I can’t wait to show Elrohir my home. O but wait, I’ve also invited Elladan, but will he come? I don’t think Lindir wants to travel and Elladan is not very likely to leave him behind. Which means Elrohir won’t come either. He won’t leave his twin.” This realisation saddened him.
Glorfindel grasped his shoulders. “Why don’t you ask them first? And I’ve got an idea. Humans tend to go on a vacation after they’ve exchanged their vows. A honeymoon, I believe, is what they call it. Maybe we can convince Elladan and Lindir to do something like that as well. In Mirkwood. Only this time before the wedding.” He frowned when he saw Elrond’s expression. The lively eyes had darkened and he looked at him questioningly.

Elrond had finally realised what Erestor had seen which they hadn’t. And instantly he knew Elrohir had seen it as well. “You came here for answers, Legolas, and I am finally able to provide them. I believe Elrohir is holding back to safe himself the heartbreak.”
Legolas’ eyes darkened in anger at the insinuation. “But I will never break it.”
Elrond sighed. “Not willingly, but you will.”

Seeing Legolas’ anger rise Glorfindel quickly intervened. “My lord.” Elrond was perplexed. Glorfindel only called him that when vexed. “I believe you owe Legolas an apology. If not an explanation for your words. And I honestly don’t understand you can even suggest such a thing.”
Elrond rose and gave the chair to Erestor. “It’s quite simple, Glorfindel. I said it because it’s the truth. None of us realised there will be another party involved. Except Elrohir.” Seeing these words only added to Glorfindel’s confusion Elrond sighed. “Legolas will go home soon, to his -father-.”
Legolas growled. “I’m not leaving without Elrohir. I already said that. And if I have to I will come back. How many times do I have to say that?”

Erestor rose and stood between the angry elves. “Calm down you three. Elrohir can do without us attacking each other. Legolas, please, think for a moment. We do not condemn you and Elrohir, far from it. We welcome it for you’ve brought the light back in his eyes and you’ve rekindled his spirit. We understand and welcome the way you feel towards each other. But we are Elrohir’s family. Not yours. And whether you go home with or without Elrohir, your feelings will show. And how will Thranduil, your father and sire, react?”
Legolas blinked his eyes. “He will be pleased I found my soul mate. Granted, it will take him some time to get used to it, but…”
Elrond raised his hand, silencing him. “Nay, Legolas, he won’t. Thranduil hates my kin and me. Were Elrohir anyone but my son, he would do as you say, but not now. Elrohir is my son. And therefore Half-Elven. Your father has not one, but three reasons to forbid your relationship. He’s an Imladrian elf, he’s a Peredhel, and my son to boot. Nay, Legolas, he will forbid this and force you to abandon Elrohir.”
Legolas sank to the floor. “But, but, why?” He shook his head. “Father only hated you and Galadriel because you both had a ring of power to protect your realm. And he hated you more because of what happened at the last alliance. But now Sauron and the ring are destroyed and Vilya and the other two no longer have their power. He would welcome the chance to make amends.” But he knew he was only trying to convince himself and hung his head in defeat.

Glorfindel picked him up and guided him to the door, sharing a look with the two dark-haired elves. A silent promise to Legolas passed between them.

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Once they had reached a silent corridor Glorfindel pulled Legolas towards himself, allowing him to let go and cry. “Ha forn, Legolas, nallo. Avgénich sî nan i-garel ed Elrohir henbich band. Pan heitha forn.”
Legolas shook his head. “How can things turn right? How, Glorfindel?”
The Elda sighed. He hated seeing anyone in distress. “Because you are both alright. You are not attached to each other, Elrohir has seen to that. And in time you and he will find others to love.”
Legolas shook. “Nay, I won’t.” lorflorfindel smiled at the passion in Legolas’ orbs. “Time heals all wounds, Legolas. Give it time and trust in the future.”
Legolas shook his head. “How can I trust in the future when it will only bring me death?”
This widened Glorfindel’s eyes. Had he missed something? But he didn’t think so.
Legolas sighed. “My heart already belongs to Elrohir. It beats for him. And I will die. Either I will obey my father, forsaking Elrohir, and thus slowly fade away or I shall go against his wishes to be with Elrohir, thereby abandoning my home and birthright and I shall also slowly die. Nay Glorfindel, do not tell me it will be all right for it won’t. Only death awaits me.”

He turned and walked away and Glorfindel already saw his light dimming. /We fix one elf and immediately another falls to pieces. Aye, Elbereth, how do we help him?/ Instead of going to the patrol as he had intended he went back to Elrond and Erestor. They needed to do something and they needed to do something soon.
When a servant came by he stopped her, instructing her to send Elladan and Lindir to Elrond as well. He could use their help too.

Turning another corner his eyes nearly bulged from their sockets when he saw Lindir attack Elladan. /Please let everything be all right./ He ran forward but halted when he heard Lindir’s voice. “You wrote them, why did you do that. I told you not to do that, I trusted you.”

End chapter 36
TBC

Translations:
Ahëa yánanya means my raging sanctuary

Ha forn, Legolas, nallo. Avgénich sî nan i-garel ed Elrohir henbich band. Pan heitha forn. Means It’s okey, Legolas, cry. You don’t see it now but Elrohir’s actions have kept you safe. All will be right. (Sindarin, except nan- but which is Quenya)