Against all odds

Chapter thirty-four Firinasúlë

Elrond looked dotingly at his sleeping lover, enjoying the way the sun and water played with the perfect body in his arms. It was at times like this he was grateful for the thunderstorm that had upended their lives. For without it they still would be perfectly hiding their love. In his heart he even knew that it was the orcs that had made sure they were now together. For without the attack and its horrid results, Elrond and Erestor still might not have aded ted their love.
He didn’t d too too long on those thoughts. He’d rather focussed on the present and the future.

He smiled lovingly when Erestor stirred and awoke. “Go back to sleep, melmë, you need not awake yet”
Erestor returned the smile. “You’re watching me?” Elrond grinned. “A feast for my eyes.” “Hmpf. And that’s reason to hum me awake, is it?”
Elrond’s eyes widened. “I was humming?” Erestor nodded, grinning. “O, you most definitely were. I’ve never heard it before. Sing it for me?” Elrond smiled, he would do anything for Erestor and he feared Erestor knew just how to exploit that fact. “I didn’t know I was humming so I also don’t know what I was humming, melmë.”
To that Erestor hummed a few notes himself, noticing how Elrond reddened. “Not a decent song?” he teased. Elrond closed his eyes. “It’s decent. It’s just…I sang it that dreadful night, when you saved me.” To stop the horrid memories from attacking his lover he kissed him. “I ran out of songs to sing at some point and so I started making new ones. That was one of them.”
Erestor nodded in understanding. “It’s alright. It just sounded lovely. But I understand.”

Elrond sat up and gathered his clothes together. Erestor dressed himself as well, blaming Elrond’s sudden gloomy mood on his own inattentiveness. “I’m...” Elrond shook his head. “Don’t even say it. I will sing it, just not here. I don’t want others to hear my poor attempts at composing.” Erestor embraced him supportively. “You’re good at everything you do.” Elrond snorted. “Liar.”
A teasing banter was about to come to life but a soldier ran hastily towards them. Erestor jumped in the air and away from Elrond, who raised his eyebrow at those antics.

About to shout at the soldier for interrupting he saw the man’s worried expression and realised something was terribly wrong. “Man ëas? Varnassëlma nes terhatina?”
The soldier shook his head. “Ú, naier. Lindir harnaina. Collërontë Már Envinyalanna ‘r mauruvantë te. Hír Glorfindel ve nyarnë nin tuvë Elrohir ve. Massë polirnye?”
Elrond nodded, gathered his things and shook his head. “Erestor carituvas. Te túla yo ni.”

Erestor nodded and headed in the direction where Legolas and Elrohir had wandered off. He understood and shared Elrond’s fears of what might happen if the news wasn’t delivered carefully.
Elrond whistled for the horses. They came immediately and whinnied softly. He told the ones that belonged to Elrohir, Erestor and Legolas to follow Erestor, whilst he mounted his own. He told the soldier to ride Lindir’s steed and noticed only one horse remained. The soldier confirmed his suspicions.
Glorfindel had whistled for Asfaloth the moment he stumbled upon the soldier who belonged to the party that had found Lindir. Glorfindel was tracking down Elladan and Linyenwaer had galloped after the elves that carried the sick elf.
“Rúcas nin, Hír Elrond. Lindir né fír lá úfírlá.” Elrond told his horse to run as fast as possible, asking the soldier to tell him all he knew. The more he learned the more he feared for Lindir’s life. And the more he needed to know what happened between Elladan and the minstrel. Somehow that was the key and there laid the solution as well. He was glad Glorfindel was already tracking him down.

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Glorfindel hung forward in the saddle, reading the tracks as his horse flew through the trees. Asfaloth sensed Glorfindel’s need for speed.
Like Elrond he too had reached the conclusion the answer laid within Elladan. But he knew something the Peredhel didn’t. Only Elladan was able to bring Lindir back. If Elladan refused, or was unable to do so, Lindir might be lost forever and yet his spirit would never enter Mandos’ Halls. It was a fate worse than death for the dead could come back to life but an elf suffering this decease did not.
Glorfindel knew everything about the decease. He had seen it up close for himself. And he never wished to witness it again. It fuelled his determination to find the elusive twin. The longer it lasted the less change there was in getting Lindir back.

Suddenly Asfaloth reared and Glorfindel looked around, wondering why he had done so. /Elladan!/ Seeing the twin run not far away from him he realised Elladan ran blindly and maybe even in circles. If Asfaloth hadn’t seen him and reared Glorfindel would havee the the same idiotic track.
When Elladan seemed not to hear Glorfindel’s shouts Asfaloth sped up, allowing his rider to tackle the running Peredhel. When he suddenly saw the ground coming closer Elladan started to trash. He thought he was being attacked. “Peace, Elladan. It is I, Glorfindel.”

Hearing the elda’s voice in his ear Elladan calmed down and turned as the hold on his shoulders disappeared. “What did you do that for?” He rose and rubbed the dust of himself.
Glorfindel took in his sight, socked at his dreadful state. Apparently what had happened had not only affected Lindir. “You have to come with me. Lindir is injured.”
Elladan’s eyes widened in shock. “W-W-What? Injured? What happened?” He immediately felt guilty for leaving him alone. He would have been able to defend Lindir. ‘Why do you care what happens to him?’ his mind countered. ‘He played with you, remember?’

Glorfindel could see his struggle but dismissed it for now. His need to get Elladan to the healing house was greater. He jumped back on Asfaloth, pulling Elladan in front of him. The horse immediately broke into a run.
“What happened?” Realising Elladan would throw a tantrum if he wasn’t answered soon made Glorfindel sigh. “I don’t know, pen-neth. The returning patrol found him. Did the two of you fight?”
Elladan didn’t answer him but jumped off. The healing house had come into view and he knew he would reach it faster running on foot, cutting short through the bushes, than staying on Asfaloth. Glorfindel didn’t stop hi
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Elrond stormed inside the Healing House, already bellowing orders. “Someone get some scented candles and raid Lindir’s room for personal, cosy items; anything that might mean a lot to him. And place a harp in front of the window. I want the wind to play it.” Everybody rushed to carry out his instructions.

The soldiers had already delivered Lindir but had remained close, unable to believe Lindir was actually lying there, fighting for his life. One of the healers had briskly pushed them into a corner, where they weren’t in the way.
They were working in top speed, creating potions and salves and frantically looking for wounds. When no wounds were found they stopped their other activities, not understanding what was wrong. They never had an unwounded elf who appeared to be dying before and they knew it wasn’t the elven-illness. The process of fading was a slow one and they knew the signs. When Elrond entered the room they were debating whether or not they had missed the signs.

Elrond approached the bed and sat down, letting his gaze flow over the pale elf to draw his conclusions. Or rather, to confirm them. He sighed saddened as he found them correct. /Glorfindel, please, bring my son here fast./

Going over his options he realised he knew very little about Lindir. Ashamed he turned to the healers and soldiers. “Does anyone know of any friends Lindir has? Real friends I mean.”
They all shook their heads, but one soldier stepped forwards. “Lord Erestor might know.” Elrond’s questioning look urged him to explain. “He knows practically everything about everybody here.”
Elrond nodded, but feared the soldier was wrong. It was true Erestor knew a lot about the elves around here, but only because they told him freely. And Lindir wasn’t talkative. Chatty, but not talkative.

Another soldier stepped forward. “Elladan.” Elrond’s head snapped towards him in an alarming rate. “I mean, your son, my lord.” He bit his lip, unsure whether or not to continue, but the sight of Lindir on the bed was enough to bring the words to life. “Lord Erestor made me promise not to talk about this, but I think the situation breaks that.”
Elrond nodded, understanding dawning upon him. “Let me guess. You’re Avanaicandil.” The soldier nodded. “Aye.” “I know what Erestor told you. And I fear they’re not friends anymore. There was tension between them today.”

Avanaicandil ushered the others out the room, including the healers. He figured Elrond didn’t want everybody to know and since he already knew so much he might be of service. He sat down as well and asked Elrond to specify, which he did. Elrond also answered the questions he asked, realising Erestor had chosen him for a good reason.
Avanaicandil laid his head in his hands and rested his elbows on his knees. It was his favourite thinking position. After a while he cleared up. “It’s just a guess, but I think I know what happened.” Elrond signalled for him to continue. “You’ve already established that Elladan is love with Lindir, right? Well, my guess is that he told him.”
Elrond looked puzzled. “If that’s the case, Lindir wouldn’t be like this. Elladan is the reason, there’s no other explanation. But how can I fit that together?”
The soldier shrugged. “A miscommunication, I fear. Elladan told him, but Lindir misunderstood. Or Elladan merely thought he told him. I don’t know about you, my lord, but if I had told someone I love them and nothing happens, I would not be happy with things continuing as if nothing had happened. Or if the other walks away, I would pretend I didn’t mean it, if that would mean I at least had his friendship back. Either way, there’s bound to be some tension. I think something like that happened between Elladan and Lindir.”
Elrond nodded. “Either Elladan told him and Lindir rejected him, prompting Elladan to try as if nothing had happened. Or he thought he told him. Which would prompt the same reaction because he thinks he’s been rejected. Nice theory, but one problem.” Seeing the eyebrows rise, he smiled. “Elladan. A rejected Elladan is not a nice Elladan. He would throw a tantrum. If nothing else. If what you suggest happened I would be tending an injured Lindir back tolth.lth. Injuries caused by the sword or a blade.”
Avanaicandil sighed. There was something they were missing.

Just then the door burst open and the object of their discussion ran in. “Ata, what happened? Lindir...” He ran towards the bed and gasped at the sight. “He looks so dead.”
The first shock hadn’t fully registered when the next appeared. “I see no injuries. Glorfindel said he was wounded. Ata?”
Elladan looked at Elrond for answers. He also needed to see a well-known face to keep him from going insane with worry. He suddenly understood how Elrohir had felt when Elrond had been injured and Erestor had gone out after him.

Elrond drew in a big breath, mentally preparing himself for a fight. “What happened between the two of you?”
Elladan’s mouth became a thin line and he straightened himself, glaring at his father. He wanted answers, not questions. When Elrond placed his hand on Elladan’s shoulder, the younger elf snapped. He shrugged of the hand. “Damn it, ata. I asked you a simple question. Now answer me. What happened?”
“STOP IT.” Glorfindel entered the room and his sudden voice shut Elladan up but he didn’t stop glaring.

The blond quickly approached and pointed to the bed. Lindir was shaking like a leaf, with a pained and frightened expression on his face. Elrond looked confused. “How can he be having a nightmare?”
Seeing the shaking form and hearing his fathers words made Elladan calm down and he sat down on the bed, gathering Lindir in his arms, soothing him. It didn’t take long before Lindir calmed down completely and his breathing even steadied a bit.

Elrond’s eyes widened further, not understanding what just had happened. Glorfindel closed his eyes and drew another chair closer. He motioned for Elladan to stay where he currently was. Drawing in a deep breath he prepared himself for a difficult talk. But before he could open his mouth Erestor walked in. “Sorry for interrupting, but Legolas took Elrohir to his rooms. I figured you might want to know. How is he?”

He had wanted to remain near the doorway and leave as soon as he had his answer, but seeing Elrond so slumped in the chair made him enter. Seeing his lover come closer Elrond shifted a bit, so Erestor could sit on his lap. Erestor kissed him on the forehead as he did so, leaning against the bed. He blushed when he saw Avanaicandil’s smile.
The soldier saw the trepidation in Erestor’s eyes and hurried to soothe him. “Don’t worry. I won’t speak of it. And may I wish you both the best of luck. I am pleased you both found happiness.” He refrained from informing Erestor on the fact that most elves were aware of the bond that existed between Erestor and Elrond.
Glorfindel smiled as well, but it was a bitter smile.

“Glorfindel!” Elladan’s voice was laden with anger and he hadn’t finished speaking and a terrified expression appeared on Lindir’s face. “Lindir, shhh, ilyë nauva vandë.” His voice was shooting and Lindir calmed down again.

Glorfindel saw understanding dawn on Erestor and the counsellor opened his mouth to speak. He shot him a glance that told him to tread careful. Erestor rolled his eyes in answer. “That’s strange. Lindir got frightened because you had raised your voice in anger and when you spoke softly and soothingly, he calmed down again.” He thought for a while. “No, don’t tell me he’s got Firinasúlë?” Glorfindel nodded. “He does.”

Elladan frowned. He had never heard of that before. “What’s that?” Glorfindel smiled. “Well, it’s similar to fading in cause. But where fading happens slowly this is rather fast. When it strikes an elf is completely rendered unconscious within seconds.”
Elrond smiled at the hold Elladan had on Lindir but what pleased him more was the effect it was having on the ailing elf. “You said it had the same cause?”
Glorfindel nodded. “Aye, it does. A fading elf grieves for one that is lost to them. But mostly the losing is gradual as well or already known before the heart fell in love. Sometimes we need not even be aware of our heart being taken and the loved one gone and yet the decease strikes. But here the one affected always knows his heart gone.”
Erestoghedghed. “So he -can- be saved in lieu of?” Glorfindel shook his head. “Nay. A fading elf travels to Mandos and a saviour in lieu of has to do the same what Elrond has done to save you.” He ignored the glare Erestor shot him, knowing Erestor only got mad for Elrond’s sake. Once the counsellor was fully aware Elrond did not care who knew, Erestor would change. “But someone who has fallen to Firinasúlë isn’t dying. His heart has died, his light hasn’t. The suffering elf can only be brought back by the one who caused it.”

To this Avanaicandil shook his head. “That’s not true. I’ve heard of a case where the effected came back on his own.” Glorfindel nodded. “Aye. He did. His beloved did not return his feelings and he had fallen to this illness. His friends and family kept talking to him and made sure he had other reasons to come back. And he did. But he wasn’t the same. His heart was gone. It had died. We can get Lindir back, aye, but he wouldn’t be the same.”

“Unless I can do so.” Elladan now understood what had happened. Then his eyes widened as realisation sunk in. He gathered Lindir even closer. “Glorfindel, ata, what do I do? How can I make him?”

Elrond smiled at him reassuringly and stood up. Elladan needed to be alone with Lindir if he was to do this. He would never open up completely with all of them here as well. “Try to figure out what has triggered this. Follow your heart and let him know you want him to return. And why.” Elladan nodded and watched them leave. He hoped he had what it took to get Lindir back.

End chapter 34
TBC

Translations:
Man ëas? Varnassëlma nes terhatina? Means What is wrong? Has our security been breached?
Ú, naier. Lindir harnaina. Collërontë Már Envínyalanna ‘r mauruvantë te. Hír Glorfindel ve nyarnë nin tuvë Elrohir ve. Massë polirnye? MEANS No, if only. Lindir is wounded. They’ve taken him to the healing house and they will need you. Lord Glorfindel also told me to find Elrohir as well. Where can I find him?
Erestor carituvas. Te túla yo ni. Means Erestor will do that. you come with me.
Rúcas nin, Hír Elrond. Lindir né fír lá úfírlá means It frightens me, Lord Elrond. Lindir was more dead than alive.
Avanaicandil see chapter 26
Ilyë nauva vandë means all will be well.
Firinasúlë means dying heart it should be firinaenda but that doesn’t look nice. Súlë means spirit. And now that we’re being honest not firina but fírla. Firina is passive participle and we need the passive participle (fírla) but fírlasúlë or fírlaenda look awful so I took a little liberty.