The Corruption and Degredation of Mary Sue
folder
-Multi-Age › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
42
Views:
1,608
Reviews:
46
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
-Multi-Age › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
42
Views:
1,608
Reviews:
46
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Me? Ulterior Motives?
Chapter 3: Me? Ulterior Motives?
"Now what exactly does this 'cheerleading' involve?" asked Legolas, mildly annoyed at the breeze causing his perfect hair to flutter.
"Oh, well it's an actual sport no matter what anyone tells you," explained Celebe She She was relaxing and enjoying the attention this elven prince was giving her. "It's really loud and noisy, though, and elves aren't really into things like thate the they?"
She twirled a strand on her finger and fluttered her eyelashes a little.
"Depends entirely on the situation," quipped Legolas suggestively. Celebelen felt herself blush.
"You're so much nicer than that girl," sighed Celebelen.
"What, Kalina? She's lovely, really," protested Legolas.
"But she's so obnoxious! I mean, she's like never met me and she already hates me!" whined Celebelen.
"Kal"Kalina doesn't get on that well with other females. Except for Galadriel. They've got some weird thing going on there that they as yet haven't let me in on. But then they're weirdly like-minded on far too many levels," explained Legolas.
"What? Galadriel is like her? I though she was wise and powerful!"
"She is. She also knows how to have a good time. More tea?" Legolas offered. Celebelen shook her head, the same look of horror and disappointment written over her features. Galadriel had been one of her favourite characters in the book, so beautiful and powerful she was. Yet apparently she was also a moody bitch. Celebelen felt crestfallen. "Are you alright?" asked Legolas, noticing Celebelen's depressed look.
"I guess... it's just so different from what I imagined... and I miss my home and my boyfriend." Celebelen sighed. She'd always secretly hoped this would one day happen to her, but nothing had lived up to her expectations. Except Legolas. He seemed nice.
"Well, I'm sure you'll get back one day," said Legolas, looking into her eyes and smiling gently. He watched smugly as Celebelen began to melt (metaphorically, not literally because that would be rather unpleasant and wouldn't make sense). He was about to lean out and grasp Celebelen's hand, then gaze adoringly at her, then whisk her away somewhere private for a few hours and ply her full of booze, when Aragorn turned up, looking nervous.
"Is Kalina up?" he asked, hiding something under his arm.
"She was, but she said she was heading back to get dressed. Knowing her, she's probably passed out again until the first hit of caffeine starts to kick in properly, which can take a couple of hours," said Legolas.
"Shit. I need her to do something for me," he said, shifting the object under his arm slightly.
"That's just shameful. And with your fiancé under the same roof," Legolas chided mockingly.
"Piss off. Look. I had an argument with Arwen and I got panicky and thought she didn't love me anymore and so I did the obvious thing and stole her diary..."
"As opposed to just sitting down and talking to her like any sane person would," interjected Legolas. Aragorn made an obscene gesture at him and continued. "... and now that all that is sorted, I'd like to get it back to her before she discovers it's missing."
"Too late. She already has gone and accused Kalina. She got full blast of mace to the face for her efforts too," said Legolas.
"What, Arwen maced Kalina?!"
"No, you useless excuse for a lost heir. What, precious little Arwen using mace on her sister?" Legolas described a scene that neither of them could imagine. Arwen deemed herself a lady, thus resorting to the age-old melee style of bitch-slapping and hair-pulling. She could use a few small weapons just as a matter of course but lacked Kalina's innately violent approach to sibling rivalry.
"Good point. Oh, hello. I'm Aragorn, son of Arathorn..." he began, noticing Celebelen.
"The heir to Gondor!" gasped Celebelen. Well, perhaps things weren't what they seemed but nevertheless she was at least getting to associate with proper royalty.
"How does she know? WHO TOLD HER!?!?" Aragorn directed this at Legolas.
"I don't know! She appears to have some kind of knowledge of our future or some crap like that. From another time and all that. You know. You hear about them popping up every so often," said Legolas, ignoring Aragorn's mania.
"That's right! You eventually become ki-mghtff!!!!" Aragorn slapped his hand over Celebelen's mouth.
"YOU FOOL!! You can't tell me about my future! YOU'LL FUCK UP THE TIME-SPACE CONTIUUM!!!!" screamed Aragorn. Celebelen's eyes again widened with fear, this time at the clearly insane human raving at her. "Legolas, I'm sorry, but we need to kill her before she ruins EVERYTHING!!" Aragorn pulled out a substantially sized knife with a rather keen glint to the blade. A muffled shriek escaped Celebelen as Legolas grabbed Aragorn and slapped him.
"Excuse him. He's on edge and gets uptight whenever something threatens his future as king and so forth. Although it's probably better if you don't mention anything about his future around him. He's a bit unhinged, but then I think Kalina has been feeding him mushrooms again," said Legolas apologetically. He smacked Aragorn again. "Go! Find Kalina! Juo awo away until you're sane," said Legolas, shoving Aragorn in the general direction of away. He glared sulkily at the blonde elf and human, then slunk off towards Kalina's.
"Are you alright?" asked Legolas kindly. Celebelen shook her head, then started to cry. 'Fucking hell. NOW I remember why I spend so much time around Kalina. She doesn't sporadically start leaking at the eyeballs and thereby forcing me to deal with it.' Repressing these sentiments, Legolas feigned a look of concerned interest and reached out to Celebelen.
"Do you want to go for a walk?" asked Legolas, standing up. "It might help clear your head. I can't imagine what you're going through." Celebelen smiled at him gratefully through her tears and got to her feet. "Elrond's gardens are looking spectacularly fine today. In particular, there's a quiet place I like to go to be alone and think," said Legolas, not a flicker of remorse over the fact he was blatantly putting this act on. He led Celebelen onto the lawn and through a path leading to a small set of stone stairs leading to another level of garden.
By contrast to the higher lawn, this garden was more like a cross-section of forest, flawlessly reproduced on Elrond's property. A small stream trickled gently in the northeast corner of the garden, obscuring a small grassy secluded patch, surrounded by bluebells. Legolas gently led the timid human towards the spot, smiling.
"Now what exactly does this 'cheerleading' involve?" asked Legolas, mildly annoyed at the breeze causing his perfect hair to flutter.
"Oh, well it's an actual sport no matter what anyone tells you," explained Celebe She She was relaxing and enjoying the attention this elven prince was giving her. "It's really loud and noisy, though, and elves aren't really into things like thate the they?"
She twirled a strand on her finger and fluttered her eyelashes a little.
"Depends entirely on the situation," quipped Legolas suggestively. Celebelen felt herself blush.
"You're so much nicer than that girl," sighed Celebelen.
"What, Kalina? She's lovely, really," protested Legolas.
"But she's so obnoxious! I mean, she's like never met me and she already hates me!" whined Celebelen.
"Kal"Kalina doesn't get on that well with other females. Except for Galadriel. They've got some weird thing going on there that they as yet haven't let me in on. But then they're weirdly like-minded on far too many levels," explained Legolas.
"What? Galadriel is like her? I though she was wise and powerful!"
"She is. She also knows how to have a good time. More tea?" Legolas offered. Celebelen shook her head, the same look of horror and disappointment written over her features. Galadriel had been one of her favourite characters in the book, so beautiful and powerful she was. Yet apparently she was also a moody bitch. Celebelen felt crestfallen. "Are you alright?" asked Legolas, noticing Celebelen's depressed look.
"I guess... it's just so different from what I imagined... and I miss my home and my boyfriend." Celebelen sighed. She'd always secretly hoped this would one day happen to her, but nothing had lived up to her expectations. Except Legolas. He seemed nice.
"Well, I'm sure you'll get back one day," said Legolas, looking into her eyes and smiling gently. He watched smugly as Celebelen began to melt (metaphorically, not literally because that would be rather unpleasant and wouldn't make sense). He was about to lean out and grasp Celebelen's hand, then gaze adoringly at her, then whisk her away somewhere private for a few hours and ply her full of booze, when Aragorn turned up, looking nervous.
"Is Kalina up?" he asked, hiding something under his arm.
"She was, but she said she was heading back to get dressed. Knowing her, she's probably passed out again until the first hit of caffeine starts to kick in properly, which can take a couple of hours," said Legolas.
"Shit. I need her to do something for me," he said, shifting the object under his arm slightly.
"That's just shameful. And with your fiancé under the same roof," Legolas chided mockingly.
"Piss off. Look. I had an argument with Arwen and I got panicky and thought she didn't love me anymore and so I did the obvious thing and stole her diary..."
"As opposed to just sitting down and talking to her like any sane person would," interjected Legolas. Aragorn made an obscene gesture at him and continued. "... and now that all that is sorted, I'd like to get it back to her before she discovers it's missing."
"Too late. She already has gone and accused Kalina. She got full blast of mace to the face for her efforts too," said Legolas.
"What, Arwen maced Kalina?!"
"No, you useless excuse for a lost heir. What, precious little Arwen using mace on her sister?" Legolas described a scene that neither of them could imagine. Arwen deemed herself a lady, thus resorting to the age-old melee style of bitch-slapping and hair-pulling. She could use a few small weapons just as a matter of course but lacked Kalina's innately violent approach to sibling rivalry.
"Good point. Oh, hello. I'm Aragorn, son of Arathorn..." he began, noticing Celebelen.
"The heir to Gondor!" gasped Celebelen. Well, perhaps things weren't what they seemed but nevertheless she was at least getting to associate with proper royalty.
"How does she know? WHO TOLD HER!?!?" Aragorn directed this at Legolas.
"I don't know! She appears to have some kind of knowledge of our future or some crap like that. From another time and all that. You know. You hear about them popping up every so often," said Legolas, ignoring Aragorn's mania.
"That's right! You eventually become ki-mghtff!!!!" Aragorn slapped his hand over Celebelen's mouth.
"YOU FOOL!! You can't tell me about my future! YOU'LL FUCK UP THE TIME-SPACE CONTIUUM!!!!" screamed Aragorn. Celebelen's eyes again widened with fear, this time at the clearly insane human raving at her. "Legolas, I'm sorry, but we need to kill her before she ruins EVERYTHING!!" Aragorn pulled out a substantially sized knife with a rather keen glint to the blade. A muffled shriek escaped Celebelen as Legolas grabbed Aragorn and slapped him.
"Excuse him. He's on edge and gets uptight whenever something threatens his future as king and so forth. Although it's probably better if you don't mention anything about his future around him. He's a bit unhinged, but then I think Kalina has been feeding him mushrooms again," said Legolas apologetically. He smacked Aragorn again. "Go! Find Kalina! Juo awo away until you're sane," said Legolas, shoving Aragorn in the general direction of away. He glared sulkily at the blonde elf and human, then slunk off towards Kalina's.
"Are you alright?" asked Legolas kindly. Celebelen shook her head, then started to cry. 'Fucking hell. NOW I remember why I spend so much time around Kalina. She doesn't sporadically start leaking at the eyeballs and thereby forcing me to deal with it.' Repressing these sentiments, Legolas feigned a look of concerned interest and reached out to Celebelen.
"Do you want to go for a walk?" asked Legolas, standing up. "It might help clear your head. I can't imagine what you're going through." Celebelen smiled at him gratefully through her tears and got to her feet. "Elrond's gardens are looking spectacularly fine today. In particular, there's a quiet place I like to go to be alone and think," said Legolas, not a flicker of remorse over the fact he was blatantly putting this act on. He led Celebelen onto the lawn and through a path leading to a small set of stone stairs leading to another level of garden.
By contrast to the higher lawn, this garden was more like a cross-section of forest, flawlessly reproduced on Elrond's property. A small stream trickled gently in the northeast corner of the garden, obscuring a small grassy secluded patch, surrounded by bluebells. Legolas gently led the timid human towards the spot, smiling.