The Crux of the Problem

Disclaimer: (In the spirit of Crimson Starlight)

In the kitchen…

Glorfindel: *standing at the counter in black silk boxers helping himself to cinnamon-raisin bread and sweet butter*

Haldir: *struts in wearing black cotton sleep pants adorned with graphics of mouths, tongues out and the message "LICK ME", goes to stand next to Glory, humming quietly*

Glorfindel: *smirks, offers Marchwarden a plate of buttered bread* Good night?

Haldir: *nods in thanks, takes plate* Oh yeah. And yours?

Shana: *pads in wearing a black silk slip, steps up behind Glory, wraps arms around his waist and rests her head against his back, closing her eyes with a soft sigh*

Haldir: *eyebrow*

Glorfindel: *HUGE smirk*

Haldir: Really?

Glorfindel: *BIGGER smirk*

Haldir: *smirks, nods head* Niiiice.

Glorfindel: *turns around in embrace, picks Shana up by hips*

Shana: *blushes, wraps arms around Glory's neck, giggles*

Shana and Glorfindel: *kissing shamelessly*

Haldir: *walks out with plate, shaking his head*

Legolas: *storms in, stops short* Oh bloody hell! Will two you just get a room already? *storms back out*

Haldir: *sticks head back in* Oh BTW Shanastay owns nothing other than her own original characters. All others belong to Tolkien and she and makes no profits on this in any way shape or form.

Chapter 3: Plotting

Janessa rummaged furiously through her saddlebags, trying to find her silver hoops. "Bloody fucking hell! I KNOW I packed those things!" A chuckle from behind her made Janessa turn to the doorway. Haldir's form was framed in the arch as he shook with barely repressed mirth. Her sharp voice gave him pause.

"That's ENOUGH from you Mr. Peanut Gallery. Now OUT! I'm not ready yet and you shouldn't be peeking!" Haldir deftly caught the small pillow hurled at him, bowing slightly before returning to the outer room.

Janessa shook her head at her own vehemence. She looked down at the clothing laid out across the bed. Not like he hasn't seen this outfit before. But I wasn't wearing it for him then and no one in Lothlorien has seen it other than his brother. Haldir should know better than to bother a lady when she's getting ready.

A knock on the doorframe brought a muttered curse from Janessa as she turned again, "Haldir I thought I told you…" Janessa's voice trailed off, her eyes widening.

Lord Celeborn stood in the doorway, an amused expression spread across his face. He quirked one brow at her gaping mouth as he gave her a look of frank appraisal. "You told Haldir what?"

Janessa's mouth closed with an audible snap. Janessa's eyes widened further and a blush rose up her chest as she became aware of her current state of dress. She was attired in only the sports bra and shorts she had become accustomed to wearing around Haldir's flat. Belatedly she dove into the bathing room for a robe, feeling Celeborn's eyes follow her movements.

Janessa emerged scant seconds later to find Celeborn flanked by Haldir, both now sporting highly amused expressions. Yanking at the ties to Haldir's robe, Janessa answered Celeborn's question. "I told him that he shouldn't disturb a lady when she's getting ready." Janessa threw a particularly angry look in the Marchwarden's direction.

"Ah," Celeborn nodded his head in understanding, turning his head to the shorter elf beside him, "don't tell me you were not aware of this?"

Haldir's eyebrows rose towards his hairline as he looked at his lord in disbelief. He threw his hands up muttering as he turned away, "I just can't win…" to the amusement of both Janessa and Celeborn. The Lorien lord laughed lightly as Haldir stalked away before turning back to the grinning red-head.

Celeborn winked at her with a smile. He then drew himself up to his full height, exuding a regal air. "Lady Galadriel has requested your presence as she prepares for this evening's festivities," Celeborn delivered the message with authority.

Janessa surveyed the Golden Lord for a moment before striding forward to look out into the main room. Her gaze happened upon a conspicuous bundle laid across the back of one of Haldir's chairs that had not been there before. She drew back and crossed her arms over her chest. Standing close to the significantly taller Celeborn she looked up and raised one red brow at him.

"She threw you out."

Celeborn visibly deflated knowing full well the perceptive woman before him would see right through his charade. "Yes." He leaned back against the doorframe his hands out to his sides in an expression of resignation. "My wife believes that your appearances should be a surprise to us on this evening."

"I think what you're trying to say is she wants some quality 'elleth-time' while she gets ready," Janessa astutely observed. Celeborn nodded, rolling his eyes before looking back to Jan. "Well, I guess I shouldn't keep milady waiting now should I?"

Celeborn's eyes followed Janessa as she moved about the room gathering what she would need to take with her until he felt a tug at his elbow. Turning toward the tug Celebron found himself looking into Haldir's simmering countenance. Celeborn followed Haldir's gaze to Janessa and back to Haldir's face. The Lorien lord was mildly amused at the emotion clearly displayed on the Marchwarden's face. You would like to believe she is yours wouldn't you Haldir? I hope she is unaware of how possessively you feel about her, otherwise she might react badly.

Celeborn allowed himself to be urged into the main room of the talan, away from the sight of Janessa removing Haldir's robe from her form and replacing it with an oversized tunic and loose leggings that clearly belonged to the Marchwarden.

Janessa emerged a moment later, a light cloak around her shoulders, the hood thrown up to cover her curler-covered head. Celeborn had tactfully chosen not to mention the comical figure she had posed when he had entered with her hair up in rollers. Janessa knew enough that if she didn't cover herself she would garner more than a few odd stares on her way to the royal talan. Janessa looked from Haldir glowering in a corner of the room to Celeborn visibly trying to restrain himself from laughing at something. She flashed the lord a grin as she swept out the talan, kicking Haldir in the shin as she passed, eliciting a rather undignified yelp from the proud elf.

Once Janessa made her exit Celeborn observed to his loyal guardian, still hopping on one foot, "She is quite a firebrand isn't she?" Haldir simply threw a rather nasty look in the lord's direction as he rubbed his shin.

*******

Janessa quickly made her way to the royal talan where she was ushered into Lady Galadriel's rooms. The Lady of the Wood smiled brightly as Janessa entered the room, gliding over to pull Jan further into the suite. A mischevious look gleamed in the Lady's eye as she took the bundle from Janessa, placing it on her bed and quickly spreading out the contents. The two females stood shoulder to shoulder surveying the bed before looking at each other and breaking into uncontrollable giggles.

"I can't believe you threw Celeborn out!" Janessa gasped.

"Neither could he. He thought I was joking at first. He was rather put out when he finally realized I was dead serious," Galadriel replied, trying to keep a straight face.

"Haldir was positively annoyed by Celeborn's arrival. That and I think he was pissed that your husband got a good look at me in my underclothes," Janessa confided.

"Did he now?" Galadriel inquired.

"Yes, though I think he was more amused by Haldir's reaction to the situation than necessarily impressed by the view."

"Don't underestimate the effect you have on males. You are very attractive and, how shall I say? Exotic to elvish eyes," the Lady explained. Seeing Janessa's anxious expression she reassured the young woman, "Celeborn can look as much as he wants. He knows better than to touch without my consent. Besides, he's all the more ardent when he comes back to my bed later," Galadriel winked.

Janessa blinked several times before bursting into peals of laughter, followed by the Golden Lady. Finally calming their mirth, Galadriel clapped her hands together, exclaiming, "Where shall we start?"

*******

Haldir brooded from his side of the room opposite Lord Celeborn, occasionally grumbling under his breath, much to the amusement of the Lorien lord. The Marchwarden finally let out a sigh, raising his eyes to observe the look of clear amusement on his liege's face.

"You find this all highly amusing don't you? You know they're up to something and with Janessa involved it can't be good." Haldir had heard more than a few stories while in Imladris about Janessa's willing complicity in many of the Perendhil twins numerous practical jokes. Apparently she had proven quite the able accomplice. Luckily he had not been on the receiving end of any such endeavors, yet.

Celeborn's brow shot up at the guardian's tone. He put up with the borderline insolence because he knew Haldir only let his emotions show like this around those he trusted. Celeborn had tried to be a father to the younger elf following the deaths of his parents at the hands of orcs. There was a familiarity and informality between the two in private that Celeborn allowed few to have with him.

"Are they? How can you be so sure? Perhaps the Lady simply craves the presence of another female whose company she enjoys and who she holds in high regard. Mayhap they simply wish to play with each other's hair and make themselves pretty. Females are like that. They cannot prepare alone, they feel the need to do so in groups," Celeborn offered.

Haldir snorted at the Lorien lord's explanation. "Do you truly believe that is what is happening? The Lady does not usually evict you when she has one of her hen gatherings, though she should."

Celeborn raised his brows in question to the Marchwarden's statement, indicating he should elaborate.

"Oh come now. Galadriel must know you eavesdrop on her little gatherings as well as doing everything you can to get a glimpse of scantily clad female forms. She's hiding something from us, from you. I bet anything Janessa's at the root of it."

"Indeed. But you forget. My wife is aptly capable of devious machinations on her own. How much worse could Janessa's presence make things?" Haldir may be right. This is definitely going to be an interesting evening, no doubt about it. "Come, we should follow the ladies' lead and prepare ourselves for the festivities. The evening draws close," Celeborn stated, pulling himself from the chair.

Haldir remained thoughtful for a moment before following his liege's lead. He knows more than he is revealing.

*********

The two females had stripped down to their underclothes and laid out Janessa's dress on the bed, her boots placed off to the side. Janessa looked sideways at the Golden Lady, "Did you get them?"

Galadriel's devious expression matched that of the red-head, "Of course, though it was quite the endeavor for my seamstress and the shoesmith to closely duplicate your outfit."

"Well? Let's see how they turned out!"

Galadriel dug around in the back of her closet before producing a medium-sized package. "I had a heck of a time hiding this from Celeborn. He's known something was up for the past week and has tried very hard to get it out of me. The lessons we gave him didn't dissuade his curiosity any."

"He can be quite persuasive then?"

"I said he TRIED. Though I did thoroughly enjoy his efforts, he did not succeed," Galadriel assured Janessa.

"Haldir caught me practicing in the talan and were it not for some quick thinking on my part the proverbial jig would be up." At Galadriel's questioning gaze Jan elaborated, grinning wickedly, "Let's just say I put all thought of my preceding actions out of his head."

Jan took the package from the Lady, spreading the contents on the bed next to her own attire. Janessa's eyes widened at what they beheld. "Well, it's nice to know I won't be upstaging you tonite."

Galdriel laughed lightly, "My dear, I believe we will both receive a great deal of attention on this eve and not just for our attire. I do believe our males will be, how did you say, catching flies when they behold our countenances."

Janessa laughed with the Lorien lady, "It doesn't take a clairvoyant to predict that. These are going to cause quite the scandal, you do realize that?"

"And the bookends we've turned my Marchwarden and husband into won't? It's about time I had a bit of excitement of the fun variety. Besides, you know full well that elves are quite comfortable with themselves. We don't have the social taboos that humans have," the Lady admonished lightly.

"True, but we are not going swimming or to the communal bathing area. This is a formal occasion," Janessa reminded. "I have no issue scandalizing the populace, I am just a woman, but you are the Golden Lady of the Wood."

"Oh posh! And as such I am not allowed to enjoy myself? Enough of this talk. Everything will go on as planned," Galadriel dismissed.

"Hey, I just wanted to make sure before we hit the point of no return."

The two females stared at each other for several moments before bursting into peals of laughter.

"They are SO going to kill us!"

*******

When the two powerful male elves faced each other after changing into their selected finery they were shocked to find their attire virtually identical. Celeborn in particular cut quite the striking figure having shed his customary robes for a different ensemble of Galadriel's choosing.

Celeborn was attired in deep sapphire blue leggings embellished with silver leaves and vines winding up the outer seams. On top he sported a shimmering silver tunic, belted in sapphire, open from the neck almost to the waist revealing a sliver of pale toned chest and stomach with blue leaves and vines crawling down the arms to the cuffs.

Haldir's was the same except his leggings were black with silver embellishment and of a tighter cut, emphasizing his powerful thighs. The tunic was silver with a bluish cast to it that brought out his eyes. The top was also of a tighter cut than Celeborn's revealing a wider expanse of skin down the front.

The two proud elves faced each other exclaiming, "They did this on purpose."

Resigning themselves to having been duped, Celeborn motioned for them to be seated while they waited for the time of the festivities to arrive. Celeborn asked Haldir about his visit to Imladris as the lord has not yet had the opportunity to hear of the trip.

Celeborn was surprised to hear of the circumstances of Haldir and Janessa's meeting. He was further amazed at Legolas' unorthodox method of exorcising Janessa's demon. How much of this is Galadriel aware of and not telling me? His curiosity now aroused Celeborn found the time for them to depart arriving all too quickly. I am going to have a LONG talk with my wife after this night.

The two elves headed out to the royal talan in silence to collect their escorts, lost in their own thoughts.

They arrived a short while later only to be denied entrance. Incensed, Celeborn shouted into the talan, "Now I am to be denied entrance to my own home?"

The guards at the door relayed their message a second time. "The ladies wished to convey their apologies and instruct you to proceed without them. They will meet you there."

Haldir's restraining hand on his arm was the only thing that kept Celeborn from trying to force the issue and storm the talan. The look on the Marchwarden's face was unmistakable. It read "I told you so," in screaming tall letters. Celeborn proceeded to storm off, followed by his faithful guardian, muttering about infernal females under his breath.

****

From the above balcony Galadriel and Janessa tried to stifle laughter at the scene Celeborn had caused just below them. "They didn't even think to look up," Janessa whispered, sending the two co-conspirators into another fit of giggles.

Once they were sure the two males had indeed vacated the premises the two females slipped out the back to make their way to the hall where the evening's festivities were being held.

****

Upon their arrival at the hall the gathered elves murmured at their Lord's stormy countenance and the lack of his Lady by his side. The two stayed near the entrance awaiting the arrival of the two conniving females.

As soon as the two males entered, a fair elleth approached the Marchwarden and curtseying offered him a small black leather satchel that he recognized as belonging to Janessa. Celeborn raised one golden brow at the other elf nodding that he should open it. The two bowed their heads over the bag to examine its contents, frowning, for revealed within was Janessa's treasured CD player, her mini speakers, and a small case containing more music discs.

Haldir looked up at his lord, "This does not bode well for us this eve."

"Indeed. Let us wait and see what it is they have planned for this MUST be good for all the trouble they've gone to."

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