Honour Before Love

Chapter Three - Sons of Elrond

Legolas was slightly startled when he heard a knock at the door.

'Enter,' he called, half expecting it to be a servant to call him to
dinner. Instead he was faced with Aragorn, who looked about as
pleased as his foster brothers had earlier.

Feeling worried, Legolas swung his legs round off the bed and stood
up to face him.

'Why the hell didn't you tell me?' Aragorn asked angrily, without
preamble.

'Tell you what?' asked Legolas almost wearily. He felt he had gone
through enough already today without his dearest friend shouting at
him.

'That there's a damn good reason why your presence here is met with
antagonism; why Mirkwood and Imladris have such ill-feeling towards
each other; and that you were involved with Elrond and then one day
just walked out.'

Legolas sighed, he had feared that coming here would finally reveal
to Aragorn about his relationship with Elrond, but had hoped that it
would not be so soon.

'I'm sorry, friend,' he said quietly. 'I know I should have told you
long ago, but I valued our friendship too much to risk it. I know
that was cowardly and I apologise.'

Aragorn stared at him, slightly taken aback to see his friend looking
so defeated. Slowly he sank down onto a chair, watching as Legolas
once again sat down on the bed.

'I've known you a long time,' Aragorn said, the heat no longer in his
voice. 'And I thought I knew you better than most. I just find it
hard to believe that you would walk away from someone you were
supposed to love.'

'Believe me, it was the hardest thing I have ever done,' Legolas
replied fervently. 'Tell me, how much do you know?'

'Very little,' the ranger confessed. 'Glorfindel would only tell me
that you had been involved with Elrond and then you left him - and
that was only because I demanded to know something. He told me to
come to you if I wanted to know the rest...so here I am.'

Legolas studied the face of his friend and saw only a wish for the
truth.

'I will tell you the truth,' he replied. 'In some ways it is not as
bad as it sounds...in other ways, worse.' The prince drew his legs
up to his chest and his blue eyes looked far away as he began to
talk.

'I had a brother - an older brother - and we were very close. When I
fell in love with Elrond he managed to persuade our father not to
disown me and to let me come and go from Imladris and Mirkwood as I
was wont.' He stopped for a moment and smiled faintly. 'Of course I
spent most of my time here, but it was good to know I was still
welcome home...even if my lover was not - one of the condition for my
freedom was that Elrond was to stay well away from Mirkwood and that
no one there was to know of our relationship.

'It was whilst I was here I received a message from my father telling
me that my brother had been sorely injured in an Orc attack. As soon
as I received the message I headed home, anxious to be by his side.
But when I arrived I discovered that the sword used to inflict the
wound had been poisoned with an unknown substance and there was
nothing any of our healers could do. I stayed by my brother's side
for three days watching him die.' He looked at Aragorn, his eyes
glistening with unshed tears. 'I was so full of grief that I did not
even realise the implications of his death until my father reminded
me. My brother had been betrothed, but had not yet married. So he
left no heirs. Therefore, I was now the crown prince of Mirkwood and
was expected to behave as one. I-I know it was weak, but I was so
stunned over Glarand's death that I accepted father's words without
argument. After all, what right did I have to be happy with my
brother gone?'

Aragorn nodded his head, but gave no answer, realising the question
was a rhetorical one

'So what happened next?' he prompted softly

'The next part is what I am most ashamed of,' Legolas replied, his
eyes showing his torment. 'Alemi, my brother's betrothed, was also
in a fearful state at his death and we almost believed she would
follow him. Somewhere, in all this madness, my father persuaded both
of us that we should marry, that it was what Glarand would have
wanted.' Legolas shook his head in disbelief and disgust. 'As if my
brother would have wanted me to marry his love! That he would have
expected me to give up the one I loved! But in our grief we listened
to father's *wise* council and agreed to it. It was almost like
being in a dream. And then, one day, we both woke up and realised
what a mistake we had made, but it was too late as we were already
married.

'We tried to make the best of it, but I am not my brother and it was
not long before Alemi became bitter that she was tied to one whose
love she could never win. And as for me, my guilt was so great over
what I had done that I could not even bring myself to write to Elrond
and reveal my betrayal. He only found out after Elrohir and Elladan
came to find me and would not leave without answers.' Legolas
fearfully waited for Aragorn's response. Two hundred years later and
he still felt the guilt clear in his mind. Why, he surmised, could
he ever expect his forgiveness, when he had never forgiven himself?

Therefore he was very shocked when he felt arms go around him and a
murmured 'I'm sorry, I understand now'.

Stunned, Legolas held onto the warmth of his best friend, his face
against his shoulder and let the tears fall. He cried for what
seemed like hours, he cried for all he had lost, all the suffering he
had caused, he cried for the death of his brother, his son and he
cried for the secrets he could not tell. But most of all he cried
for the fact that the arms holding him were not the ones he needed
and that the lips whispering words of comfort were not the ones he
cherished most in the world.

Eventually Aragorn left and Legolas somehow found the energy to wash
and change out of his riding clothes into something more suitable for
dinner. He guessed the habits of Rivendell would probably not have
changed over the years and so at the expected time, he headed towards
the dining room.

He had just reached the corridor to the main rooms when he
encountered the twins.

'What on Arda are you still doing here?' Elladan snarled at him
whilst Elrohir looked at him with loathing.

'Your father has invited me to attend the Council tomorrow,' Legolas
replied levelly, but unable to keep a look of defiance off his face.

'Then more fool him!' burst out Elrohir angrily. 'After the
suffering you've caused him, he should have had you thrown straight
out.'

'You are probably right,' the blond elf agreed. 'But I am grateful
that he has not. I do not yet know all that has occurred recently,
but I wish to help in any way I can.'

'We do not need *your* help, princeling,' Elrohir replied scornfully.

'We will see,' Legolas replied quietly.

'As soon as the Council is over I want you gone from here,' Elladan
said fiercely. 'You're not going to have the chance to hurt our
father again.'

'I think your father is perfectly capable ookiooking after himself,'
Legolas replied a little heatedly. He was starting to get a little
annoyed about the over-protectiveness they were showing for Elrond.
Anyone would think he was an elfling rather than a great warrior who
had fought in the Last Alliance.

'Have you never heard of grief?' Elladan asked bitterly. 'Once he
heard of your betrayal he sank into the depths of despair. If he was
not a Peredhil we would surely have lost him.'

Legolas turned pale. 'I do not believe it,' he whispered, shaking
his head in denial. 'Elrond is too strong to fade from grief.'
Though even as he said those words, it suddenly made sense why the
twins hated him so much. A broken love affair was one thing, but if
they had nearly lost their father because of it...

'It is true,' declared the younger twin. 'So if you have any
feelings for him at all in that so-called heart, you will stay away
from him.'

Legolas nodded numbly, unable to speak and all defiance drained out
of him. To think he had nearly caused the death of the one he
loved. The only comfort he had was that if Elrond had passed, he
would surely have followed him.

Elladan and Elrohir looking satisfied that their message had hit
home, left him to his reverie. Legolas, now having no stomach for
food, nor the courage to face the one he had nearly killed, instead
headed back to his room.

He threw open the doors to the balcony and breathed in the cool night
air. His fists clenched over the edge of the balcony and his eyes
shut tight as he unwigly gly relived how his father had trapped him...


Flashback

As the days went by and the grief over his brother's death slowly
started to dissipate, he realised what a terrible mistake he had
made - and from the way that Alemi was acting he knew she felt the
same way. As the fog lifted from his mind, he knew that all King
Thranduil had said was lies; Glarand would never have wanted him to
part from Elrond and least of all marry someone he barely knew so
quickly. Bitterly he realised why his father had been so insistent
that they marry so soon, he hadn't wanted to give either time to
really understand what they were doing.

It had now been a month since the wedding - four since he had left
Rivendell - and he had not yet got up the courage to write to his
love and tell him of his folly. It has also not helped that for the
last few days he had started to feel unwell and he had noticed his
stomach was slightly distended - though the amount of food he was
consuming probably had something to do with that.

The Healers were no help and Legolas started to worry that something
was seriously wrong with him. That was when Thranduil finally told
him the truth.

'I know exactly what's wrong with you,' he said, stony-faced.
Legolas looked at him in alarm.

'Then tell me!' he begged. 'I cannot go on without knowing.'

'Our family is cursed.' He replied.

'In what way?' the younger elf asked anxiously.

'Many, many years ago the Valar gave us what they termed a 'gift'.'
He looked at his son almost sorrowfully. 'It is the real reason why
I have always outlawed males laying with males. I hoped that after
all these years it might no longer be true, that it had not been
passed on to you...'

'Please father, just tell me what is wrong with me!'

Thranduil gave a deep sigh and then looked his son straight in the
eye.

'The gift the Valar gave us was the ability for males to bear
children.'

Legolas looked at him, stunned.

'You mean...I'm with child?' he asked in shock. He brought a hand
down to his stomach. 'I carry Elrond's child,' he murmured in
wonder. He didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

'It would seem so,' Thranduil replied.

Legolas looked at his father accusingly.

'So all this expecting me to marry a female to produce an heir was
totally unnecessary,' he spat out.

'Of course it wasn't,' protested Thranduil. 'As I said I wasn't even
sure it was still true and even if it was there can only ever be one
child and there is no assurance that it will be male.'

Suddenly Legolas gave a bitter laugh.

'So I could be carrying the future heir to Mirkwood fathered by the
Peredhil you despise and yet I am married to an elf-maiden I have no
feelings for because you convinced me it was the only way to beget an
heir. Sometimes life is truly ironic!' He fixed his father with an
angry stare. 'You do realise you have ruined my life? I should be
in Imladris with the one I love, but how can I go back when I am
bound to another?'

'You will never go back to Imladris,' Thranduil said coldly. 'Elrond
is far too proud an individual to take you back now. Besides this
must never get out, it would bring shame to the family and the
kingdom.'

'And how do you plan to hide it?' Legolas asked angrily. 'It will
soon become very obvious! And what about the baby? How would you
hide that?'

'When it becomes obvious you will have to stay in your quarters,'
Thranduil replied calmly. As soon as he had realised that his son
was pregnant, he had quickly decided on a course of action. 'Except
for a trusted few, everyone else will be told you are still suffering
from grief over your brother's death.'

'But what about the baby?' Legolas repeated, hardly believing what he
was hearing.

'I will shortly give out the joyous news that Alemi is with child.'

Legolas could not speak as it sank in what lengths his father would
go, to stop dishonour being spread on his family name.

Of course, Thranduil being Thranduil, everything went as planned. If
any of his subjects saw any discrepancies in what they were told,
they had the good sense not to say - Thranduil was not known for his
tolerance of any who displeased him.

The first time Legolas held his son and looked into his grey eye, he
knew he would always have a part of Elrond with him and he vowed that
one day he would tell him the truth.

End of Flashback

TBC