Pen-Estel

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Glorfindel grinned when he entered his bedroom and found Legolas still asleep. He had woken very early today – even before Gloriel woke and demanded to be fed – and so he had already organised for their breakfast to be brought to his rooms in an hour. But until then, he planned on keeping Legolas awake, and busy…

He pounced onto the youth, growling threateningly into his ear, but instead of the reaction he had hoped for – sudden fear quickly morphing into hungry submission – all his effort got him was a frightened yelp, quickly followed by an annoyed look and a huff as Legolas turned to his belly.

Glorfindel frowned. “Are you begging me for a spanking, roch neth?” he purred, waiting for the inevitable trembling, the rush of desire, the soft, pleading moan that so far had always shown how just the merest suggestion of this excited the youth – but not so this time.

“I am sorry. I was… I am still tired,” Legolas said softly, and while the remorse in his voice was true, it was still lacking the warmth of desire. As if to make up for his earlier reaction, he quickly kicked the blanket away before he spread himself out on the bed, obediently offering himself up to his Lord. And even tough this was the submission Glorfindel had wanted, the absolute surrender that he cherished more than anything else, something was still different.

But then, they had a demanding little child to care for, and maybe Legolas really was simply tired, and thus so strangely passive.

Glorfindel pressed a kiss to Legolas’ nape, breathing in his scent while he allowed his hands to follow the elegant lines of the youth’s body. No punishment today, then – instead he would make certain that he would rest some more, later on. There was always time for wilder games tomorrow, and for now, he would be satisfied with claiming him slowly… slowly, but deeply, and so completely that he would have Legolas begging for release long before he would allow it.

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Oh, he was so wonderful like this – when he was sleepy and relaxed. Glorfindel slid deep inside Legolas for what might have been the hundredth time, enjoying the heat and the way his body had to continually adjust to take him.

“Ah, roch neth!” he groaned appreciatively. “You feel so good!” Legolas moaned longingly in answer and Glorfindel grinned, reaching around to take hold of his neglected hardness. He stroked Legolas slowly in time with his lazy thrusts in and out, over and over again, until the youth was whimpering and incoherent.

“Do you want to come?” he asked wickedly, stopping to listen to Legolas’ answer.

“Please, my Lord!” he gasped, and Glorfindel felt a warm glow in his victory, resuming the slow movements again without another word, smiling secretly to himself when Legolas moaned again in frustrated desire.

Only a few minutes later… or was the hour nearly up? Glorfindel decided to take mercy on him at last. Truly, he had woken up now, and Glorfindel squeezed his shaft one last time before giving the order, anticipating the way Legolas would clench around him so surely that he almost came himself before he realised it wasn’t there.

Stunned, he pulled out and turned Legolas over quickly. Perhaps he hadn’t heard. His eyes were glazed over in helpless lust and his body was shaking with the nearness of orgasm. Glorfindel relaxed, and began to caress Legolas again without resuming the penetration. For now, he just wanted to assert his control over the youth.

“Now, Legolas,” he commanded, and although Legolas shivered and moaned, he didn’t come.

“Please!” he begged, as if Glorfindel hadn’t said anything. Then to Glorfindel’s astonishment, Legolas reached down and grabbed hold of his wrist, looking deeply into his eyes, holding his hand still before actually thrusting in and out of the grip provided by his fingers.

Feeling almost insulted, Glorfindel quickly yanked his hand away, ignoring Legolas moan of distress. “Well, roch neth,” he began. “It would appear you are in need of some training.” Legolas immediately looked panicked and he shook his head, his eyes wide at last in awareness.

“No, please! I am sorry. I just couldn’t!” Glorfindel ignored the desperate protest, and wondered what the best way would be to teach him – then he laughed softly.

“When I tell you come, you will do it, roch neth,” he said threateningly, then held Legolas down and claimed one of the swollen nipples with his lips. He pulled on Legolas deliberately and deeply, as hard as he could, feeling the supple body arch up beneath him so suddenly that his own weight almost wasn’t enough to keep Legolas down. He didn’t stop though – he swallowed – and then he suckled again. He could hear the youth’s frantic sobs and cries, but it didn’t encourage his leniency, not even when he felt the warmth of Legolas’ release on his thigh.

After fully two minutes, he pulled back, and regarded the sight. Legolas was spent completely now, his gaze vacant and glassy, as if he slept. But he didn’t sleep. He whispered words of contrite apology and pleas for it to stop even now, as though he could still feel it. His body still hummed with tension, even and despite his orgasm, and so Glorfindel lowered his head to the opposite nipple, giving that one the same treatment.

When he was done this time, Legolas had changed. Now his trembling was so slight he hardly moved, and his eyes were closed as if were mortal. Sweat had broken out all over him, and he still moaned on every outward breath. Glorfindel looked down only to find that the youth had climaxed more than once, and he suddenly felt guilty.

“Legolas?” he said softly, and the youth’s eyes flew open and fixed on him.

“Not again!” he suddenly begged. “Please! I cannot!” Glorfindel shook his head and Legolas reached out to him desperately. “I’m sorry, my Lord. I will do better next time, but please, don’t do that anymore!”

“Shh, Legolas,” Glorfindel murmured and pulled the youth into his arms, hoping that the warmth of his embrace would stop the shudders that still ran through Legolas’ body.

“I am sorry!” Legolas whimpered, desperately clinging to Glorfindel when the Lord continued to soothe him.

“I know, Legolas… hush now,” Glorfindel whispered, pressing gentle kisses to his hair while he ran his hands over Legolas’ back. “It is over, I promise – no more now.”

Inwardly, Glorfindel wondered at himself. How could he not have realised what this was doing to Legolas? He had punished him similarly many times, and always they had both been aware that in truth this so called punishment brought much more pleasure than pain for Legolas.

Had he grown so complacent, so certain of himself that he expected the same reaction every time, no matter the circumstances? Legolas had come several times, yes, so there had been pleasure for him – but he was clearly distraught now, and Glorfindel could not help but feel that he had let him down.

He should have paid more attention – he vowed that he would not make that mistake again. For a while he continued to whisper soothing words into Legolas’ ear while he gently stroked his body, and only when the youth had finally relaxed did he get up again. He fetched a cloth to clean them both, and then readied a bath, smiling a little when Legolas did not even protest as he scooped him up to carry him into the bathroom.

Once they were both settled in the hot water, Legolas sweetly boneless and pliant in his arms, Glorfindel took up the slow, gentle caresses again. Legolas sighed softly but did not speak, and for the moment Glorfindel was content to simply enjoy their closeness. After a while, he gently pushed Legolas forward to wash his hair, with Legolas returning the favour afterwards. But just when Glorfindel began to contemplate whether he should ask Legolas why his reaction had been so different today, they heard the sound of small feet racing through their bedroom only to be followed by a disappointed groan when the intruder found their bed deserted.

Glorfindel chuckled softly. “Look who has woken as well – stay in the water, he can just as well join us for the bath. That way at least we can make certain that he does not get himself into trouble.”

Glorfindel rose from the bath, dripping wet, and entered their bedroom in the same way, roaring like a monster and opening his arms to chase Gîlríon around the room for a few times to the child’s delight. In the end, he scooped a giggling Gîl up in his arms to carry him towards the bath, taking the tray with breakfast with him, which somebody had left on a table in the meantime.

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“And then what?” a sleepy voice demanded. Glorfindel started, drawn from his recollections of panic and fire and death by his son. He cleared his throat.

“And then, I said to the monster: ‘I will kill you!’ And it laughed,” he said in mock astonishment.

“It laughed?” Glorfindel began to get the impression he wasn’t believed, and he turned to regard Gîlríon with a look of utmost seriousness on his face. Their son was in bed, and he was fighting reverie… but not for much longer. Glorfindel saw the unfocusing of his eyes, and he leaned over to tuck the covers gently around the tiny figure in the small bed. He smiled.

“Yes, it laughed. I will tell you why tomorrow, ion nín.”

“Remember, though,” Gîl murmured at the last before his breathing slowed in sleep. Glorfindel stood up straight and smiled a little sadly.

“I’ll remember,” he promised. But I won’t necessarily tell you, he thought. He made his way into their bedroom slowly, glancing at Legolas who held Gloriel in his arms.

He sat in his favourite chair, waiting for his lover to join him. It had been two months since the birth now. Two glorious, exciting months during which he had tried to make up for all of their lost time. He said nothing when Legolas came in and closed the nursery door softly, only waited expectantly. He watched Legolas pad over to the chest that contained all of their toys and take out the collar. It had become a ritual by now, and Glorfindel’s eyes narrowed in desire at what he was going to do.

Every day seemed to last an eternity when the presence of Gîl meant they couldn’t be as intimate as they might want. Of course, sometimes he had the nurse care for their children, when Legolas was just too tempting, but evening was by far and away his favourite time of day.

He settled back in his chair and relaxed as Legolas came to kneel before him without a word, holding out the collar with his head bowed. Glorfindel smiled, and began to reach out, but then he frowned. There was something wrong in Legolas’ posture. Something different. He took the collar anyway, and noted how Legolas moved to hold his hair away from his neck, then Glorfindel shook his head.

“Look at me, aras neth,” he said softly, fingering the collar thoughtfully. His lover looked up in confusion.

“My Lord?” But there was something else, wasn’t there? What was it…? Resignation? Glorfindel took a deep, deliberating breath while Legolas looked into his eyes submissively.

“I don’t think we will use the collar tonight, roch neth,” he said, troubled, pressing the strip of leather back into Legolas’ hands. “Go and put it back.” Legolas’ eyes fell, but not in disappointment. The sigh was so slight he almost didn’t hear it, but it was there.

Glorfindel watched him in disbelief, feeling both insulted and angry. What was happening here? He just did not understand Legolas, and suddenly he felt a deep sadness when he watched the youth put the collar back.

Was this what Legolas wanted? Did he truly no longer desire to play their games? For that was what it looked like to Glorfindel. Why else would he behave as if the collar was no more than an unloved duty for him?

Glorfindel stood and turned away. “Go to bed, Legolas,” he said tiredly. “It is late, and you must be exhausted. I will join you later – I still have some work left to do.”

He did not look back when he left the room, although he felt a tinge of shame at what felt like fleeing from Legolas to him. But he could not stay, not when he felt so confused. Something was not right – it was time he finally admitted it. For so long now, he had told himself that Legolas’ strange passivity was because he was tired, that the excitement would return once Gloriel was a little older and things were no longer so stressful – but the truth was that it had not been like this when Gîl had been at this age.

There was something else, and Glorfindel knew that he had only denied it for so long because he was afraid that he already knew the answer. And truly, in the light of that terrible relief in Legolas’ eyes when he had told him that they would not play tonight, there was only one answer he could see.

All of Legolas’ reactions had shown him that the youth did not want to play their games anymore. And for once, Glorfindel found himself so deeply shocked that he did not know what to say or do. He certainly could not sit down at his desk or return to their bed, so instead he found himself wandering through empty corridors, barely seeing his surroundings as he wondered what he should do.

The easiest solution would of course be to simply ask Legolas whether something was wrong – but what if the answer was that Legolas truly did not enjoy their games?

Glorfindel stopped and leaned against the wall. He loved Legolas, more than he had ever loved anyone else in his life, and he loved him for more than his sweet submission which had always seemed so natural – but to do completely without?

Glorfindel shook his head in despair. If that was what was asked of him now, he did not think he could do it.

Lost in his thoughts, he almost jumped when arms closed around him from behind. How could he have let someone sneak up on him? Even… even Legolas. Glorfindel smiled secretly despite his confusion, realising that this was a side of Legolas he hadn’t enjoyed before.

The old Legolas would have stayed in his rooms – waiting for him. But this confident Legolas had followed him – and now…

“My Lord,” he said softly, his arms sliding around Glorfindel’s waist as he insinuated himself between Glorfindel and the wall. “What is wrong?” Legolas tilted his head up for a kiss, and Glorfindel found himself giving in for the first time to the youth’s simple expectation, helpless to stop it. Just the taste of Legolas’ sweetness was enough to make him hungry for more, and he felt Legolas moan into the kiss as his hands roamed over Glorfindel’s chest, coming to rest on his shoulders to pull him closer.

“Legolas,” he whispered against the youth’s lips, dropping all their other names, wanting to say so many things, but somehow unable to frame them. In a kind of frustration he cupped Legolas’ buttocks with his hands and pulled him close, almost off his feet, as he began the kiss anew.

As always, he knew the pleasure of feeling Legolas melt against him as though they were made to be together like this. He rubbed his arousal against the youth’s, it finally entering his head that Legolas was just as hard as he. Suddenly he broke the kiss and pulled back just a little to look down at his lover.

Images tumbled through his mind as he saw that Legolas was not merely enduring this, but that he invited it, that Legolas was just as lost and helpless, that somehow, despite everything, this love was still real. And so was Legolas’ submission to him.

He tried to keep in mind just what he knew he had in his arms – what Legolas had given him. The children, his love and devotion, his forgiveness, but he couldn’t. Legolas’ eyes were half-closed in lust, his lips parted and reddened by their kiss, and all Glorfindel could think of was claiming him.

“I will have you here,” he said, as a command, wondering if that would end the strange passivity at last. “Now.” Legolas’ eyes opened wide, but there was no hint of the fear and alarm he would have expected. Instead, there was such passion that Glorfindel’s breath was momentarily taken away by it.

“Yes! Oh, yes! Please!” Stunned, Glorfindel realised that Legolas was too confident to be afraid, and although it merited thought, he couldn’t care when he felt Legolas hooking one leg behind him, standing on tiptoe, making it easy.

Underneath the robe he wore, he was naked. Glorfindel saw that now, because it had fallen open and he looked down the front of Legolas’ body, finding himself automatically holding the youth in position for him to… A quick forceful movement up and forward and it was all so perfect. So hot and tight around him. Legolas inhaled sharply in pain or surprise.

“Hold me,” he pleaded, and Glorfindel kissed Legolas’ neck, thinking as he felt his flesh squeezed and encompassed by Legolas’ body that he wanted the same thing… Hold me.

“Is this what you want?” Glorfindel groaned quietly, resisting the temptation to fuck Legolas where they stood until the youth begged for it to stop. The only answer he received was a needy, incoherent moan – a trembling of the youth’s body that was so beautiful Glorfindel closed his eyes. It didn’t matter anymore. Whatever was wrong with Legolas would have to wait for him… for this.

“Yes… I want it. Please!” Legolas moaned, clutching at Glorfindel as if he were afraid that he would fall, although Glorfindel held him pressed against the wall.

“I want it too… I want you,” Glorfindel groaned in answer, throwing all his earlier doubts to the wind. All that mattered now was that Legolas was his, in the way that mattered most. “Always be mine, Legolas,” he whispered into his ear, pulling out of him only to push back inside, hard and fast, confident that Legolas could take it. If there had been an answer, it was lost in the soft cry Legolas could not keep back, and Glorfindel continued to take him at an almost brutal pace, driven by Legolas’ sounds of pleasure. There could be no games now – it was too late for that, even for Glorfindel. And when he finally spent himself with a groan that sounded far too desperate even to himself, Legolas quickly followed him as if Glorfindel’s release had been the command he was waiting for.

Glorfindel rested his head against the wall, breathing hard, and enjoyed the way Legolas’ body still trembled against him with the last shocks of pleasure.

“I will always be yours,” Legolas sighed softly, and now Glorfindel was the one who trembled when he felt Legolas’ lips move against his throat. “Do you doubt me?”

Glorfindel swallowed and suddenly felt ashamed for his earlier doubts. Maybe it had been his fault after all – maybe he had simply misread the youth. There was no denying that Legolas had enjoyed it, and there had been no passivity in their encounter at all. Maybe he had truly been simply too tired for games earlier, and the fault was all his for doubting Legolas and seeing problems where there were none?

“I do not doubt you,” he answered hoarsely, but still kept his face hidden in Legolas’ hair.

“Then why won’t you look at me? Please, my Lord,” Legolas said gently, “I know you just as well as you know me. There is no work you have to do, at least not here in the corridor. Why did you leave? Something must have upset you…”

Glorfindel finally looked at Legolas, at his request, and felt suddenly foolish, because what he was about to say sounded so silly. But he couldn’t help it.

“You seemed so accepting. I began to wonder if you really wanted to play,” he said, troubled. His state of mind at the confession was not helped by the giggle that bubbled forth from Legolas.

“Oh!” he said at length, as if he had thought of something. “Did you want me to resist, my Lord?” Legolas was teasing him! Glorfindel was completely taken aback at this turn of events, and he shook his head slightly before withdrawing and letting Legolas go. But it still wasn’t that easy, and Glorfindel found himself being led back down the corridor to their rooms by his lover.

“Come, my Lord. You can play and I will fight you if that is what you want.” He spoke merrily, almost too offhand, and suddenly Glorfindel stopped so that Legolas almost stumbled when the hand he was leading refused to budge.

“What do you want?” he asked seriously, taking note of the eager way Legolas turned to him at the question… or maybe it was what he was getting away with all of a sudden. Yes, perhaps that was it. Legolas smiled.

“I want you. However I can get you.” Glorfindel allowed himself to be led again at that little reassurance, but he began to wonder in his heart. What if the ‘however’ wasn’t enough?

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This was much more satisfying. And if the truth be told, probably much closer to what Elrond had meant than the collar and chain. Glorfindel nodded to himself as he tied the last knot, looking down at his bed and feeling a moan of lust rise in his throat. This was the way they played now. At first, Legolas was always animated and aware of what was being done to him… but now… Glorfindel took in his flushed cheeks, the lost little whimpers he was sure Legolas didn’t realise he was giving out, and he knew that Legolas was his completely.

As a finishing touch, he placed a blindfold around the youth’s eyes, smirking when Legolas only sighed fitfully and struggled to raise his body from the bed so that Glorfindel might touch him somewhere else.

A sudden knocking at the door threw Glorfindel off his stride when he would have teased the youth with fleeting touches and kisses, and he strode to the door quickly, only opening it slightly to see who was on the other side. It was just the nurse, knocking to say that she was leaving for the night. She had family of her own now, too. Glorfindel saw her walking away from the door, and silently closed it again, turning to look back at Legolas at the same time.

There was a reward for being ignorant, it seemed. Legolas must have heard the door, and now he lay still on the bed, breathing quick and shallowly, trembling, looking so delectable in his fear that Glorfindel really couldn’t help himself. They didn’t have an audience… but Legolas didn’t need to know that, did he?

“You are so beautiful,” Glorfindel said softly, smiling at Legolas’ answering moan. “I can see how much you want me… how much you need me. Is that not true, Legolas?”

“It is, my Lord,” Legolas moaned, trembling harder.

“And what is it you need from me? Tell me what you want, Legolas!”

“I want your hands on me, my Lord! You can do anything to me, anything you want, but please, touch me!” Legolas pleaded, still trembling with excitement and fear, although Glorfindel was certain that the youth was trying to tell himself that his Lord would never allow another to observe him so.

“You are so beautiful when you beg,” Glorfindel sighed, then smiled at what he was going to do next. “Don’t you agree, Elrond?”

Legolas gasped and froze, and Glorfindel almost chuckled when he saw how despite Legolas’ reaction, he grew even harder at the idea of being watched.

“Show Elrond how you moan for me,” Glorfindel suggested, finally stepping close enough to run his fingertips slowly over Legolas’ chest. “Let him see how your body burns for me, roch neth - don’t hold back. I want him to enjoy this as well.”

Glorfindel let his fingers circle around a nipple, teasing it to hardness only to gently pinch and tug until Legolas no longer resisted but instead moaned and whimpered as Glorfindel had commanded.

“I could play with you all night when you are like this,” Glorfindel said warmly. “Never give you more than the touch of my fingers, exploring all of your body, teasing and torturing all the places that give you pleasure until you are so sensitive that the lightest touch would make you come – and yet I would not allow it. Not until I were certain that you have shown Elrond how well you can submit, how much you can bear if I ask it of you. Shall I do that today?”

Legolas whimpered, his body already as taut as a bowstring although Glorfindel had not even begun to put his words into action.

“Or would you beg for mercy? You can, you know… in fact, that is the only thing you can still do. Beg and plead.” Glorfindel laughed softly when that forced another moan from Legolas. “Apart from that, there is nothing you could do to make me stop, no matter what I choose to do to you. But remember that we are not alone today, roch neth - if you embarrass me in front of Elrond, I will let him watch while I punish you.”

“Please!” Legolas gasped, and Glorfindel smiled secretly at his reaction to the threat. He moved his hand down so that he could drag his fingertips lightly up the inside of Legolas’ thigh. “Glorfindel!” he cried out then, in desperate need, his body arched up as much as possible considering the restraints, trying to encourage Glorfindel to give him more.

“Are you begging for punishment, roch neth?” he asked evilly, his fingers moving to play with the globes of flesh between the youth’s legs. “It sounds that way.”

He couldn’t see Legolas’ eyes behind the blindfold, but he knew perfectly the look of confusion and helplessness that he would wear, and he efficiently reached inside his leggings and began to stroke himself with his other hand at the thought of it. “No, my Lord,” Legolas whimpered. “I…” He stopped, shivering as though he would find release.

“No?” Glorfindel asked in a whisper, continuing with the intimate caress, wanting to see Legolas lose the fight, but still feeling overcome with lust and pride when he didn’t, remaining on edge and needy. Then, to his surprise, Legolas turned his head on the bed, which was about the only movement left to him.

“Elrond…?” he said timidly, uncertainly, and Glorfindel was surprised at the rush of feeling he felt. It wasn’t quite jealousy, but it was powerful. All of sudden the games were too much, and he found himself wanting to claim Legolas as his own again.

“Pay attention to me, Legolas!” he ordered harshly, moving his hand to take the shaft of the youth in a sure, firm grip. He stroked with the intention to undo Legolas, to make him come.

“Oh, please!” Legolas almost whined, and Glorfindel could feel the heat pouring from his body like a fire out of control. “My Lords…” To hear Legolas beg them both was one of the most arousing things Glorfindel had ever heard from Legolas’ lips – and he had heard many things. For a moment he didn’t register the warm, sticky wetness on his hand that meant the youth had climaxed, and he continued with the demanding caress for a moment or two before resting his hand heavily on Legolas’ hip, still stroking himself with the other.

“I’m sorry!” Legolas whimpered, mortified to have disobeyed, but Glorfindel didn’t even hear it. Instead he found himself almost wishing that they weren’t alone, because he wanted to see what Legolas would do and say when he saw Elrond watching him. If Elrond had been here, Glorfindel would surely have taken the blindfold away now just to observe Legolas’ reaction. And it was with that thought in his mind – the thought that he wanted Elrond there with them – that he came himself, seeing the white of his seed fall onto the bound and helpless body before him.

Glorfindel bit back a moan when he looked down at Legolas. The youth’s body was limp with pleasure, his skin still flushed and gleaming with sweat, and Glorfindel now truly regretted that Elrond was not with them, because such trust did not deserve to be rewarded with a lie. He did not even know why he had said it – but at that moment, it had seemed like the perfect way to tease Legolas, and although he did not know if he would still feel this way if Elrond were truly in the room right now, the thought of having him witness Legolas’ submission made him groan.

He knew that he should end the game now, but when he thought of seeing the disappointment in Legolas’ eyes once he realised that they were alone, he hesitated. He did not want it to end, not yet… In the end, this had come to him as almost as much of a surprise as it must have been for Legolas, and he did not want to stop until he fully understood what it meant.

“You are sorry?” he asked slowly, his voice still a little hoarse. “I told you to behave for the sake of our guest, and what do you do?” He rested his hand on Legolas’ belly, slowly rubbing their mixed seed into Legolas’ skin while he felt the youth trembling again with fearful excitement at his words. “You wilfully disobey, and all you can do is say you are sorry? That is not enough, roch neth… that is far from enough to make up for what you did. I am starting to believe that you want to make me punish you. But then we have to make certain that our guest stays entertained, and seeing you well punished is something I am certain he will enjoy just as much as I do. What shall I do with you, Legolas? I will let you choose – choose something that will be entertaining for Elrond to watch, and at the same time be an appropriate punishment for your misdoing.”