The Corruption and Degredation of Mary Sue
folder
-Multi-Age › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
42
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1,635
Reviews:
46
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Currently Reading:
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Category:
-Multi-Age › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
42
Views:
1,635
Reviews:
46
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Uncle Glorfy Oversteps the Bounds of Trust
Chapter 28: Uncle Glorfy Oversteps the Bounds of Trust
Fearing Kalina’s retribution over smoking the majority of her weed, her companions had left her well alone for the rest of the afternoon and better part of the evening. She was currently sitting under a young willow, reading by a flickering torch stuck into the ground. It was a pleasantly warm evening, theoretically allowing Kalina to stay in the garden and keep out of trouble.
Setting her book aside and using her dagger to mark the page she was on, Kalina decided to roll another joint from the meagre remnants in her weed pouch. She eyed the general region of Elrond’s secret garden, still mildly miffed about her father having stolen her drugs the other day. His little patch of shire weed was about ready to be harvested anyway. Surely he wouldn’t miss a few leaves here and there, and if she stashed them near the fire in the great hall they’d dry out in no time.
Abandoning her possessions beside the willow, Kalina stood up and crept quietly through the garden to the oversized hedge. Running her hand along the evergreen plants, she found the hidden gap that allowed access to an entire plot of exotic looking plants when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
“I’ve always wanted a redhead for a wife,” said Saddam Hussein as Kalina jumped back and started to reach for her dagger….
Which she remembered was back by the willow in her book. The vile Iraqi dictator took a step towards Kalina who was continuing to reprimand her own stupidity.
“Me and Osama were just leaving. Care to join us?” offered Saddam, foolishly stepping within arm’s reach. Kalina reached out and grabbed the collar of his shirt and slammed her forehead into his face with surprising brutality. The former dictator slumped to the ground.
“I’M NOT A FUCKING REDHEAD. Are all you fucking humans colorblind or something? It’s fucking auburn!” Kalina spat, kicking Saddam in the kidneys for good measure.
Despite the battering, Saddam had enough wits about him to grab Kalina’s ankle and pull her off balance. She landed heavily on the ground and looked around for something to concuss the dictator with while trying to kick his hand with her free foot.
Suddenly a figuusheushed through from the secret drugs garden and grabbed the Iraqi and threw him aside. With a yelp, Saddam got to his feet and fled as Glorfindel turned to regard Kalina.
“Are you alright?” he asked, dropping down and offering Kalina a hand. She grasped it and pulled herself up, breathing deeply after the abrupt end to the scuffle. For some inexplicable reason, the sight of Glorfindel looking concerned over her welfare seemed to be impeding her ability to catch her breath.
“Fine. The fucker caught me by surprise and unarmed. What were you doing in Daddy’s garden?” inquired Kalina politely, feigning innocence as Glorfindel stood up beside her.
“Probably the exact same thing that brings YOU here,” replied Glorfindel evenly. Kalina wrinkled her nose indignantly at the accusation.
“Well, Daddy helped himself to at least an eighth and my so-called friends and that cunt Haldir smoked the majority of what was left,” muttered Kalina sulkily. A strand of her hair moved by the light breeze fell across her face. Glorfindel reached out and smoothed it back as Kalina started backwards, still tense, then relaxed and drew closer to the elf lord, taking his hand in her own.
‘Stop it, stop it, stop it,’ ordered the fragile remnants of Kalina’s dubious conscience. ‘He’s seen you tear off your clothes and run around screaming and naked during that important council your father was holding when you were four. This does not mean you are entitled to see him naked in return… although you’ve got to admit as far as your father’s friends go he IS stunning… have you checked out his arse recently?’
Kalina caught herself tilting her head around surreptitiously, trying to get a glimpse of Glorfindel’s behind. This was starting to feel more than a little awkward, and not just on her part.
Glorfindel couldn’t help but admire the beauty of his friend’s daughter, especially in conjunction with the rumours he had heard about her nocturnal antics. He’d made it no secret that she was his favourite of Elrond’s children although what he was feeling now started to overstep those bounds of the surrogate uncle he was regarded as. Not entirely certain of what to say, he uttered the first thing that came to his head.
“I’ve got some more weed back in my room… but you might have to do something for Uncle Glorfindel first that we’ll have to keep secret from your father…”
Somehow that didn’t come out quite the way he wanted it to sound, but it seemed to be working. Kalina was clearly rendered mute by the revelation of a horde of previously suppressed adolescent fantasies were about to come true. Attractive elves over the age of 3000 occasionally had this affect on her, particularly ones like Glorfindel whose very presence oozed with masculinity and centuries of firsthand knowledge of the most vulgar depravity know to any of the races, bar the really really nasty evil ones who took their corpse raping far too seriously.
She nodded vaguely and allowed herself to be led to Glorfindel’s bedroom, giving her plenty of time to confirm the belief that Glorfindel did indeed have a hot ass.
As soon as Kalina shut the door to his room behind her Glorfindel grabbed her and pushed her up against the door, his lips pressing against hers. He slid his hand down her neck and down the front of the loose shirt she wore, gently moving it over her breasts. Willing to put her trust in Glorfindel’s experience, Kalina felt little e need or desire to even attempt to dominate the situation.
“Rinc dad a lave-nín panno aes,”* whispered Glorfindel, pulling slightly away from Kalina and starting to hastily unbuckle his belt.
Feigning a look of alluring innocence, Kalina dropped down to her knees, looking up with a slight smile on her face as she moved away Glorfindel’s hands and loosened his trousers, letting them fall around his ankles. Grasping the considerable protrusion of flesh in one hand, Kalina extended her tongue and began to flick it gingerly over the throbbing head. An ecstatic gasp escaped his lips as the young elf continued to both pleasure and tease him with equal adeptness.
“Gar-ha pân, nûr-lanc enni,”* he panted, craving more gratification. Kalias oas only too willing to comply.
At about the time Kalina was giving in to Glorfindel’s desires and dropping down on her knees, Haldir was starting to get on Legolas’s nerves quite severely. In addition, he was feeling a little put-out by Kalina’s absence.
“Oh get over it. She’s probably snuck out somewhere with Aragorn or one of her brothers to get wasted and is still annoyed about you stealing her dope,” snorted Haldir, lying on Legolas’s bed and smoking a joint rolled from Kalina’s stash. He offered it to Legolas who glared at him.
“So what exactly are YOU smoking? Besides. She bought that off of me… well, bought isn’t the right word, but a transaction did occur and services were rendered for that eighth and she knows if I smoke too much I’ll replenish it,” griped Legolas. “Whereas you actively stuffed her smokeables up your rectum to avoid detection. I’m just glad you took the time to wrap them up first,” he added nastily.
“You’re just pissed off because your girlfriend is probably off fucking someone else and didn’t invite you,” taunted Haldir.
“Haldir, fuck off. I’m just not in the mood. Just go away,” snapped Legolas. He was still irked about the orc thing and Haldir had yet to apologise and stop blaming Kalina, which was getting extremely tiresome.
“Fine! Be a cunt. See if I fucking care!” snapped Haldir, sitting up and sliding off the bed. He sauntered out of Legolas’s room, slamming the door behind him. ‘No bloody respect from any of them. Fuckers. The lot of them.’
Brooding and sulky, Haldir marched out of the house and into the gardens and beyond, trying to take a walk to calm himself down and avoid thinking that just possibly he should apologise to Legolas and stop giving Kalina too much of a hard time if only for the sake of having the moral high ground. He walked for a good two miles before stopping to sit down on a nearby boulder and take in the dramatic night sky as the moonlight illuminated the peaks of the Misty Mountains eastwards.
“Arse, I probably HAVE been a cunt,” he sighed, closing his eyes. Legolas was generally very laid back and it took a good deal of effort to actually provoke him. And stealing Kalina’s stash had been a bit low, even if she was a permanently agitated trollop.
These thoughts churning through his mind, he did not hear the steps behind him and only realised something was happening as he turned, too late to stop a heavy branch slamming into his head.
“Cunt!” he managed to gasp as he lay on the ground, clutching his head and trying to make out his assailants in what appeared to be a deepening darkness…
“He’d better not be damaged,” warned Osama bin Laden, prodding the unconscious elf with his foot. “We need one of his kind to get a better understanding of this place if we are to fight for it.”
“Bah. At worst he’ll be concussed,” snorted Saddam.
“You carry him,” ordered Osama, turning and walking, leaving the Iraqi struggling to lift Haldir onto his shoulder, grumbling.
-----------------------------------------
* Go down and lick my enlarged meat
* Take it all, deep throat me
Fearing Kalina’s retribution over smoking the majority of her weed, her companions had left her well alone for the rest of the afternoon and better part of the evening. She was currently sitting under a young willow, reading by a flickering torch stuck into the ground. It was a pleasantly warm evening, theoretically allowing Kalina to stay in the garden and keep out of trouble.
Setting her book aside and using her dagger to mark the page she was on, Kalina decided to roll another joint from the meagre remnants in her weed pouch. She eyed the general region of Elrond’s secret garden, still mildly miffed about her father having stolen her drugs the other day. His little patch of shire weed was about ready to be harvested anyway. Surely he wouldn’t miss a few leaves here and there, and if she stashed them near the fire in the great hall they’d dry out in no time.
Abandoning her possessions beside the willow, Kalina stood up and crept quietly through the garden to the oversized hedge. Running her hand along the evergreen plants, she found the hidden gap that allowed access to an entire plot of exotic looking plants when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
“I’ve always wanted a redhead for a wife,” said Saddam Hussein as Kalina jumped back and started to reach for her dagger….
Which she remembered was back by the willow in her book. The vile Iraqi dictator took a step towards Kalina who was continuing to reprimand her own stupidity.
“Me and Osama were just leaving. Care to join us?” offered Saddam, foolishly stepping within arm’s reach. Kalina reached out and grabbed the collar of his shirt and slammed her forehead into his face with surprising brutality. The former dictator slumped to the ground.
“I’M NOT A FUCKING REDHEAD. Are all you fucking humans colorblind or something? It’s fucking auburn!” Kalina spat, kicking Saddam in the kidneys for good measure.
Despite the battering, Saddam had enough wits about him to grab Kalina’s ankle and pull her off balance. She landed heavily on the ground and looked around for something to concuss the dictator with while trying to kick his hand with her free foot.
Suddenly a figuusheushed through from the secret drugs garden and grabbed the Iraqi and threw him aside. With a yelp, Saddam got to his feet and fled as Glorfindel turned to regard Kalina.
“Are you alright?” he asked, dropping down and offering Kalina a hand. She grasped it and pulled herself up, breathing deeply after the abrupt end to the scuffle. For some inexplicable reason, the sight of Glorfindel looking concerned over her welfare seemed to be impeding her ability to catch her breath.
“Fine. The fucker caught me by surprise and unarmed. What were you doing in Daddy’s garden?” inquired Kalina politely, feigning innocence as Glorfindel stood up beside her.
“Probably the exact same thing that brings YOU here,” replied Glorfindel evenly. Kalina wrinkled her nose indignantly at the accusation.
“Well, Daddy helped himself to at least an eighth and my so-called friends and that cunt Haldir smoked the majority of what was left,” muttered Kalina sulkily. A strand of her hair moved by the light breeze fell across her face. Glorfindel reached out and smoothed it back as Kalina started backwards, still tense, then relaxed and drew closer to the elf lord, taking his hand in her own.
‘Stop it, stop it, stop it,’ ordered the fragile remnants of Kalina’s dubious conscience. ‘He’s seen you tear off your clothes and run around screaming and naked during that important council your father was holding when you were four. This does not mean you are entitled to see him naked in return… although you’ve got to admit as far as your father’s friends go he IS stunning… have you checked out his arse recently?’
Kalina caught herself tilting her head around surreptitiously, trying to get a glimpse of Glorfindel’s behind. This was starting to feel more than a little awkward, and not just on her part.
Glorfindel couldn’t help but admire the beauty of his friend’s daughter, especially in conjunction with the rumours he had heard about her nocturnal antics. He’d made it no secret that she was his favourite of Elrond’s children although what he was feeling now started to overstep those bounds of the surrogate uncle he was regarded as. Not entirely certain of what to say, he uttered the first thing that came to his head.
“I’ve got some more weed back in my room… but you might have to do something for Uncle Glorfindel first that we’ll have to keep secret from your father…”
Somehow that didn’t come out quite the way he wanted it to sound, but it seemed to be working. Kalina was clearly rendered mute by the revelation of a horde of previously suppressed adolescent fantasies were about to come true. Attractive elves over the age of 3000 occasionally had this affect on her, particularly ones like Glorfindel whose very presence oozed with masculinity and centuries of firsthand knowledge of the most vulgar depravity know to any of the races, bar the really really nasty evil ones who took their corpse raping far too seriously.
She nodded vaguely and allowed herself to be led to Glorfindel’s bedroom, giving her plenty of time to confirm the belief that Glorfindel did indeed have a hot ass.
As soon as Kalina shut the door to his room behind her Glorfindel grabbed her and pushed her up against the door, his lips pressing against hers. He slid his hand down her neck and down the front of the loose shirt she wore, gently moving it over her breasts. Willing to put her trust in Glorfindel’s experience, Kalina felt little e need or desire to even attempt to dominate the situation.
“Rinc dad a lave-nín panno aes,”* whispered Glorfindel, pulling slightly away from Kalina and starting to hastily unbuckle his belt.
Feigning a look of alluring innocence, Kalina dropped down to her knees, looking up with a slight smile on her face as she moved away Glorfindel’s hands and loosened his trousers, letting them fall around his ankles. Grasping the considerable protrusion of flesh in one hand, Kalina extended her tongue and began to flick it gingerly over the throbbing head. An ecstatic gasp escaped his lips as the young elf continued to both pleasure and tease him with equal adeptness.
“Gar-ha pân, nûr-lanc enni,”* he panted, craving more gratification. Kalias oas only too willing to comply.
At about the time Kalina was giving in to Glorfindel’s desires and dropping down on her knees, Haldir was starting to get on Legolas’s nerves quite severely. In addition, he was feeling a little put-out by Kalina’s absence.
“Oh get over it. She’s probably snuck out somewhere with Aragorn or one of her brothers to get wasted and is still annoyed about you stealing her dope,” snorted Haldir, lying on Legolas’s bed and smoking a joint rolled from Kalina’s stash. He offered it to Legolas who glared at him.
“So what exactly are YOU smoking? Besides. She bought that off of me… well, bought isn’t the right word, but a transaction did occur and services were rendered for that eighth and she knows if I smoke too much I’ll replenish it,” griped Legolas. “Whereas you actively stuffed her smokeables up your rectum to avoid detection. I’m just glad you took the time to wrap them up first,” he added nastily.
“You’re just pissed off because your girlfriend is probably off fucking someone else and didn’t invite you,” taunted Haldir.
“Haldir, fuck off. I’m just not in the mood. Just go away,” snapped Legolas. He was still irked about the orc thing and Haldir had yet to apologise and stop blaming Kalina, which was getting extremely tiresome.
“Fine! Be a cunt. See if I fucking care!” snapped Haldir, sitting up and sliding off the bed. He sauntered out of Legolas’s room, slamming the door behind him. ‘No bloody respect from any of them. Fuckers. The lot of them.’
Brooding and sulky, Haldir marched out of the house and into the gardens and beyond, trying to take a walk to calm himself down and avoid thinking that just possibly he should apologise to Legolas and stop giving Kalina too much of a hard time if only for the sake of having the moral high ground. He walked for a good two miles before stopping to sit down on a nearby boulder and take in the dramatic night sky as the moonlight illuminated the peaks of the Misty Mountains eastwards.
“Arse, I probably HAVE been a cunt,” he sighed, closing his eyes. Legolas was generally very laid back and it took a good deal of effort to actually provoke him. And stealing Kalina’s stash had been a bit low, even if she was a permanently agitated trollop.
These thoughts churning through his mind, he did not hear the steps behind him and only realised something was happening as he turned, too late to stop a heavy branch slamming into his head.
“Cunt!” he managed to gasp as he lay on the ground, clutching his head and trying to make out his assailants in what appeared to be a deepening darkness…
“He’d better not be damaged,” warned Osama bin Laden, prodding the unconscious elf with his foot. “We need one of his kind to get a better understanding of this place if we are to fight for it.”
“Bah. At worst he’ll be concussed,” snorted Saddam.
“You carry him,” ordered Osama, turning and walking, leaving the Iraqi struggling to lift Haldir onto his shoulder, grumbling.
-----------------------------------------
* Go down and lick my enlarged meat
* Take it all, deep throat me