Pen-Estel

Finally more Glorfindel and Legolas... Enjoy! :)

ElenadiVita: Ohh, but nothing says "I love you" more than putting a collar onto someone - at least in Glorfindel's opinion. *g*

Nim: Don't worry, Glorfindel wouldn't truly hurt Legoas, not after all that has happened - but that doesn't mean that he is going to stop playing his games. ;)


Chapter Twenty-Eight

Legolas stretched languidly when he woke, revelling in the warmth of Glorfindel’s arms around him, and the knowledge that this was how he would wake every morning from now on once more. “Good morning, my Lord,” he sighed happily, leaning back when Glorfindel’s hand stroked up his chest – only to freeze when it reached the collar that was still fastened securely around his throat.

Glorfindel chuckled softly. “Good morning, pet,” he purred, his fingertips moving along the collar while Legolas shivered in his arms. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yes, Faron,” Legolas said weakly, his eyes falling closed as he was once again transported back to the last night. What Glorfindel had done to him… what he had voluntarily done… Legolas could not hold back a moan when he remembered, and Glorfindel smiled against his shoulder.

“I have always found that exhausting a pet is quite an effective way to make sure it stays obedient. But for now, aras neth, I think it is time to feed you – we will need to keep up your strength so you can meet all my demands. And those of Gloriel, of course…” Glorfindel smirked, his hand moving back down Legolas’ chest, making certain to rub teasingly against a nipple.

Legolas gasped and arched up, and Glorfindel finally let go of him, laughing softly. “So eager, aras neth?”

“For you, always,” Legolas sighed longingly, giving Glorfindel a look from beneath lowered eyelids while his own hands moved up to circle his swollen nipples.

“Up! Now! Or do you want me to lead you to table on the chain?” Glorfindel growled, giving Legolas’ bottom a slap for good measure when the youth gave in and got up with a sigh. Legolas yelped and hurried away, drawing a bath for his Lord before Gloriel woke as well.

At last, when the bath was full of water, Legolas remained knelt beside it for a moment, swirling the water with his fingers, wondering if he dared to lean over and look at the collar that encircled his neck. He didn’t dare to touch it… but he could see.

Slowly, he leaned over the edge of the water, watching as the reflection settled, only to see Glorfindel stood behind him. Legolas cried out in shock, but before he could do anything, he felt a finger inserted under the back of the collar, pulling on it so that he stood up. Further still, until he found himself gasping for breath at the tightness of it, the length of his body pressed to Glorfindel, his arms straight by his sides so that his hands touched Glorfindel’s hips, his head thrown back on his Lord’s shoulder in an attempt to ease the restrictive pressure on his throat.

“Please,” he gasped after a minute or two of this torture, and then suddenly the collar was released. Legolas sagged against Glorfindel helplessly, already automatically reaching up with his hands only to find that his Lord had foreseen that reaction and had quickly trapped his hands by his sides.

When he had recovered a little, Glorfindel’s hands moved up his arms, stroking him so that he almost moaned and pressed back against the Lord. When he felt those warm hands encircle his neck he closed his eyes submissively, whimpering slightly when he felt the roughened fingertips sliding underneath the leather of the collar.

Before he knew quite what had happened, he was free and Glorfindel had taken the collar from his neck. “Good, Legolas,” Glorfindel praised, and whatever his feelings, Legolas felt his body responding to the praise. The Lord reached down then to caress him with one hand. “Very good.” Legolas moaned and was then turned around in Glorfindel arms. He felt the collar being pressed into his hand and he looked down at it.

“You know where this belongs, don’t you, Legolas? With everything else?” Legolas nodded dumbly, looking at the nondescript length of thick brown leather he held in his hands. He studied it further, and gasped when he saw a metal plate with something inscribed on it – aras neth – and he looked up at Glorfindel in a kind of slowly dawning horror.

“You had this made?” Legolas asked, blushing, and Glorfindel just laughed.

“Of course I did! That is why it fits you,” he said in amusement. Legolas just bit his lip and sighed, yelping when Glorfindel slapped his bottom again. “Now put it away, roch neth, then come back here. When we are alone in the evening, then I will expect you to take it out and bring it to me so that I can put it on you. Do you understand?”

“Yes, my Lord,” Legolas agreed readily as he went to obey Glorfindel’s instructions, feeling a little faint at the thought he would get to experience it again tonight.

As Legolas had foreseen, Gloriel woke only a few moments later. While he looked after her, Glorfindel in turn woke Gîl and helped him to wash and dress. By the time they were finished and the nurse had been summoned to keep watch over Gloriel, it was time to leave for breakfast.

The events of the last night had made Legolas forget everything but Glorfindel and the pleasure his Lord could give him, but now he once more thought of Elrond, and the knowledge that had come to him at last.

Elrond truly loved him - that he would push him away just so that Legolas could be happy was proof enough. Certainly it must have cost Elrond a lot...

Legolas sighed softly as he remembered how Elrond had looked for those short moments before he had entered his room. He had been utterly lonely and desolate, so much so that Legolas had felt a pain in his own heart at the sight. Even Elrond's declaration had changed nothing of what he felt.

He needed to let Elrond know that he forgave him - that he knew that what Elrond had done had been an utterly selfless act to ensure that Legolas no longer doubted himself. Yet at the same time, he had to make certain that Glorfindel would not find out what Elrond had tried to do. His Lord might have forgiven all that had happened in the past, yet Legolas was not so certain if he would be able to do so again.

He was silent while they made their way to Elrond’s table, but Glorfindel was distracted enough by Gîlríon’s curious questions about his new sister that he did not seem to notice. Legolas was glad of it, as he knew that he would never be able to hide his moods from Glorfindel.

And once they were seated, Legolas no longer had time to think about Elrond. This was the first time most of their friends and acquaintances had seen them since the birth, and there were even more curious questions waiting for them. The name Legolas had chosen was met with delighted approval, and even Elladan, who sat quiet and wan beside his father, gave Legolas a small smile before he quickly looked away again so that he would not rouse Glorfindel’s ire anew.

Despite the atmosphere, breakfast was really a quiet affair, and Legolas realised with a warm feeling that it was due to respect – no one wanted to overtire him. Once it was over, Elrond immediately got up to leave with a brief smile in Glorfindel’s direction. Quickly, Legolas turned to Glorfindel, for a moment scared but then confident when he saw how his Lord looked at him.

“My Lord, I have to see Elrond for a few moments,” he said quietly. To his surprise Glorfindel immediately looked concerned.

“What is it? Are you in pain, Legolas?” Legolas smiled and took Glorfindel’s hand in an attempt at reassurance.

“No… it’s nothing like that. I –” He stopped, uncertain how much to say. “I just need to speak with him. That’s all,” he said assuredly. Glorfindel nodded, and leaned close.

“Don’t be too long, roch neth,” he warned, and Legolas blushed slightly before nodding and taking himself from the table to follow Elrond. As he left, he looked back, and saw Glorfindel look thoughtfully at Elladan. That made him hesitate, but then he couldn’t stay and keep the peace. Elrond needed him. He had said hardly anything during the meal, and Legolas hoped that although he couldn’t offer Elrond any more than friendship, it would be enough to make him smile again.

At first he hurried after Elrond, but he soon forced himself to slow down. A confrontation in the corridors was the last thing they needed – and what he had to say could wait a few moments, for he knew Elrond well enough to know that he would go straight to his desk to start on his work for the day. For an hour, Elrond would stay there alone before one of his counsellors would come in to bring him more letters. In the past months, Legolas had often made a game of distracting Elrond during that time… and he hoped that despite what had happened, Elrond would still listen to him.

When he reached the door to Elrond’s office, he knocked and waited until Elrond called him inside, sounding rather startled at the interruption. Legolas smiled when he entered the room, remembering how he often had surprised Elrond like this, only to tease him until he stopped working – but the near panic on Elrond’s face quickly brought him back to the present.

“Elrond – I want to talk about yesterday,” he began, but when Elrond quickly got up from his chair to take a few steps back, he realised that he should have phrased his request differently.

“Didn’t I say enough yesterday?” Elrond asked, raising his hands as if to keep Legolas from coming closer. “Your reaction was clear enough!”

“Yes – you said enough,” Legolas said softly, his heart once again full with love while Elrond sighed and looked down, clearly expecting another rejection.

“I wanted to thank you. You are the best friend I have ever had. Nobody else would have done something like this for me.” Legolas’ smile widened when Elrond suddenly looked up. “Were you really willing to give up my friendship, just so that I would realise that I am not helpless? I know that that is what you were doing – you would never hurt me on purpose.”

Legolas took a step closer towards Elrond, but then he stopped. More than anything he wanted to embrace the Lord to show him that he had forgiven him, that he still loved him as a dear friend – but with all that had happened, he did not dare to. But hopefully, there would be a day in the future when all three of them would be able to forgive and forget, and to be friends once more. For now that Legolas knew what it was like to have a friend, he did not want to be without such friendship anymore.

He looked at Elrond to try and convey all these thoughts and feelings that way if he couldn’t embrace him, and what he saw made him falter. He lost his breath when he saw the desire in Elrond’s eyes, not because it surprised him, but because he felt an answering need in himself. He remembered all of their nights together, and although he knew he was happy with Glorfindel, he couldn’t help thinking of that moment the night before, when despite his submission he had thought of Elrond.

“I have to go,” Legolas said suddenly, and he noted Elrond’s relief with a wry smile.

“Yes. You should.” He didn’t stay any longer. To do so would be to invite temptation where it wasn’t wanted, and so he went back to his Lord’s rooms alone, reflecting on it all. By the time he had arrived back, he was sure it would get easier. Elrond was vulnerable now, and as much as he didn’t want to hurt the Lord, it would probably be best if he left Elrond alone for a while to come to terms with what had passed between them, and more, that it was now over.

Legolas stopped dead. Over. He wouldn’t be unfaithful to Glorfindel, but he couldn’t help mourning the loss of Elrond as his lover. It had been a simple choice, an obvious one, but it wasn’t easy. The sense of equality he had felt with Elrond had been real. And he would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit that he was going to miss taking the Lord. That was something he would never know again, and Legolas found himself hungering for it now that he knew what it was, and what it felt like.

He sighed longingly, and then resumed walking faster than before when he remembered Glorfindel warning him not to be long. At the thought of whom he truly belonged to, his heart felt light and his pulse quickened. Strangely, the thought of never knowing Glorfindel that way didn’t bother him in the least. In fact, the thought that he was to submit to the Lord always only excited him. Oh, he had made the right decision! He wondered if Glorfindel would play with him some more before the day began in earnest. Legolas hoped so, because he wanted it, and because the submission might make him forget for a while what he had given up.

He was to be disappointed though, because when he reached their rooms he heard more than one voice. He frowned, and then almost groaned. Elladan. Why? Legolas remembered how angry Glorfindel had been with Elladan and he dashed the last few steps to throw open the door before trouble could break out. There had been more than enough trouble on his account lately.

“You promised you wouldn’t hurt him!” he cried, only to feel very foolish when instead of the scenario he had imagined – Elladan bruised and bloody, or cowering while Glorfindel threatened him with knife or sword – he found both unharmed. There were no raised weapons, but there was a tension in the air that spoke of the argument he had interrupted.

“I have not hurt him – at least not yet,” Glorfindel said, giving Elladan a contemptuous look. “Although the Valar know he would deserve it for what he did!”

“Can you not let it rest? I am here, and unharmed!” Legolas begged softly, at which Glorfindel snorted, while Elladan looked away.

“Unharmed! He might not have wounded you, but he did abduct you! And the baby, Legolas, our little Gloriel – certainly even you will realise into what danger this idiot brought both you and our daughter? I know that you cannot bear it to see someone hurt for your sake – and truly, my sweet little fool, I love you for it, although the Valar know that I sometimes think it a curse! – but he endangered the baby, Legolas! Just imagine what might have happened, if we had not ridden out to search for you!”

“I said that I am sorry!” Elladan growled. “What more do you want? I regret what I did! I will not harm him again! What else do you want to hear from me?”

“You are sorry?” Legolas’ eyes widened and he took a step back when for the first time he heard Glorfindel shout. He flinched when he heard the answering wail of the baby, feeling absurdly glad that the nursemaid was still with her. As much as he wanted to calm her, he knew that right now, his presence was needed here, or it might come to more than just shouting.

“See what you have done! You upset Gloriel – both of you!” he accused. “Please, let us simply forget what has happened! Both Gloriel and I are well, and Elladan has already promised that he would never harm the child!”

“Harm the child?” Glorfindel just barely managed to keep from shouting once more. “What kind of promise is that? What elf would harm a child? To have to promise something like that – it is unthinkable! Or is that your human blood showing at last, Elladan?”

Elladan had grown white, and when he spoke now, his voice trembled with rage – there were no traces of remorse left. “You forget yourself, seneschal! I will leave now – don’t ever talk to me like that again, or I will make you regret it!”

Legolas simply watched as Glorfindel stepped in front of Elladan to stop him from leaving as if he couldn’t intervene. And maybe he didn’t want to. His thoughts were in a whirl as what Glorfindel had said finally sank in. My little fool. Was that truly what Glorfindel thought of him? And the notion of love, thrown out carelessly like a hook to a fish… Legolas shook his head slightly.

He looked at Elladan, saw concern in his eyes and wondered if he looked ill. He couldn’t banish Glorfindel’s words from his mind – because he now knew what it was like to have a lover submit and to please you. Just knowing that made all the difference, because it made him aware of just what he did for Glorfindel. How much, and what it meant… my little fool. Legolas turned away from the scene in front of him and fled to the garden.

He sat calmly down on the grass in the sunlight and waited. Would the length of time it took Glorfindel to come to him mean anything? He wondered about that, as he recalled all of their games, and his willing submission to them. The things he and Glorfindel did were not the same as what he and Elrond had done. He knew that. With Elrond there had been a definite switch to fantasy, while with Glorfindel… Legolas swallowed. His submission to Glorfindel was such that it could come at any time – indeed, it was there all the time – all it required to make him play his part was a well-chosen word or action from Glorfindel.

Was he a fool? In these moments Legolas even wondered if he had made the right decision, as the time wore on and Glorfindel didn’t come to him. But then, suddenly, he felt body heat behind him and arms closing around him possessively. Legolas jerked as if he had been burned, and stood immediately, turning to face the Lord before he could fall under the familiar call again.

Glorfindel said nothing, and only reached for him. Legolas took a step back. It was the hardest retreat he had ever known. It felt wrong, but he had to know.

“No,” he said, and there was no sign of his inner weakness in his voice. Glorfindel looked nonplussed.

“Come, roch neth. Elladan is gone now. He won’t be bothering us again.” Legolas shook his head, because that wasn’t what this was about.

“You believe me to be a fool?” he asked, hurting, watching his Lord’s reaction carefully. Glorfindel’s expression hardened and he stood. Again, Legolas took a step back, maintaining the much-needed distance.

“Only because he would take advantage of it, Legolas! I was trying to protect you.”

Legolas felt a strange, humourless smile on his lips. “And you?” Legolas took a deep breath. “I forgive you too,” he said softly, thinking of all the things that he had already forgiven Glorfindel for. “Do you take advantage of it?”

Of course he did, but what Legolas meant was something a little more complicated. “If you despise my ability to forgive so much, how can you truly love me?” He carried on before Glorfindel could speak. “Or am I truly just a pet to you?” He thought of all the many nights he had spent with Elrond, nights when they hadn’t played, but talked, and it seemed a world away from what he knew with Glorfindel. “Do you even know me?”

In a flash, Glorfindel was with him, and there was no escaping his embrace this time. Legolas tried to resist, but eventually he leaned upon the Lord in quiet defeat and sighed as Glorfindel kissed his hair tenderly.

“Oh, I know you,” he said warmly, and Legolas moaned.

“Don’t,” he pleaded. “I need to know.”

“Do you take me for a shallow, self-serving lover, Legolas?” Glorfindel asked quietly, and Legolas shivered. “I know you. I have always known you, and I know what you don’t want to hear.”

Legolas let Glorfindel tilt his head up, but instead of the kiss he had been expecting, he found himself looking into his Lord’s eyes as he continued to speak. “You don’t want to hear that you are everything I need. Your beauty, submission, and yes, your capacity to forgive are perfect for me. But I say it anyway. What you need to know is that I can be your protector, your Master, and I will be such with care and attention. I love you because when we are together it pleases you as well as it pleases me. You might be happy for a day or an hour in someone else’s company – but you need me, Legolas. You need me to make you forget yourself. You need me as much as I need you, and I love that.”

He found himself drowning in Glorfindel’s words as he had so often drowned in the pleasure of his touch, and he pressed against the Lord in unspoken love and adoration. Glorfindel smiled, and it felt golden and blessed to Legolas.

“We need each other. We are a perfect compliment to each other, however our relationship differs to that of others. They don’t know us like we know each other. You realise that, don’t you, Legolas?”

“Yes,” Legolas sighed, realising that Glorfindel spoke the truth, but still there was a small part in him that just would not let go. “But still I am no fool.”

“I did not call you a fool,” Glorfindel protested, chuckling, and when Legolas frowned, he hurried to speak before he would be interrupted. “A sweet little fool, that was what I called you - my sweet little fool. And it is the truth; you are sweeter than honey, sweet as a birdsong, as the warmth of the sun on my face. And you are a little fool, too – for forgiving those who hurt you so easily. For forgiving Elladan, for forgiving Elrond – and me.” Glorfindel sighed, burying his face in Legolas’ hair. “You are a little fool… but I am a big fool. For hurting you, for sending you away, for blaming you for what I knew was all mine and Elrond’s fault.”

“And I have forgiven you for that,” Legolas said, his voice still a little cold. “You think it makes me a fool, to forgive so easily… But you do not know what it is like to grow up without friends. Even one more person who does not hate me is a gift, and I would rather have you call me a fool than live with Elladan’s enmity.”

“I know, Legolas,” Glorfindel sighed. “I understand… but can you not understand as well that to have you threatened, you and our children, is the one thing I fear most? I have already lost everyone I loved once – to think that the same could happen again, that I could lose you and Gîl and Gloriel… It frightens me more than the Dark Lord himself.”

“You are lucky I am so foolish,” Legolas said reluctantly, “for yet again I forgive you, because I love you, and yes, because I understand you. Still I wish you had not called me that – it makes me feel that you think me a girl, or a child. Someone who is foolish, but ultimately of no importance, so you call my foolishness sweet and indulge me. Yet I am not a girl, and I am not a child – you made certain of that yourself when you took my innocence and gave me a child of my own.”

Glorfindel looked guilty then, and suddenly Legolas felt bad for what he had said. But then it was all true, and he would not lie to himself anymore – not even to make Glorfindel feel better. He would not ignore his fears either, hard though it might be to face them. Following Elrond’s advice regarding his thoughts and behaviour had been difficult, and yet it led to new freedoms for him. He could live now without fearing the thoughts of others so much. And he knew that he couldn’t afford to slip back into the way he was before.

“Tell me something,” Legolas demanded, not pleading. He wanted to hear something that would put his mind at rest, and address his fear directly, not cover over it with words and compliments. He stared at Glorfindel, and then sighed, trying to break free of him when he said nothing.

“Legolas,” Glorfindel said softly, and he stayed to listen. “What you fear from me… that is why I want to make Elladan sorry. I fear the same things happening to you, and I will not allow anyone to treat you in that way. I don’t think of you that way myself.” Glorfindel looked troubled for a moment. “Not anymore,” he corrected. “I spoke without thinking. I do value your forgiveness. I am sorry.”

Legolas smiled secretly against Glorfindel’s chest. This was at last what he needed to hear, and he embraced the Lord happily, moving his head so that he could kiss Glorfindel’s neck. “And I know you are not a girl,” Glorfindel added wickedly, reaching down to caress his maleness so suddenly that Legolas cried out. He pressed himself into Glorfindel’s hand, struck with the sudden fear of being outside… and being observed.

“You know,” Glorfindel said suggestively, “Gîlríon and Gloriel are still with the nurse…” Legolas moaned and nuzzled the Lord’s throat hungrily as his body became hard and willing at Glorfindel’s touch. He felt himself scooped up as Glorfindel carried him back inside and he closed his eyes in surrender already.