the trouble with love

Chapter fortysix Remember

Glorfindel smiled gratefully when the party disappeared from sight. He knew things would go well and he had left instructions the men were not to return until the prisoners were on the ship and the ship out of sight and Elrond had written a letter for the elves of the Grey-Haven, informing them what sort of elves they were.

He momentarily closed his eyes, thinking of the following hours. He opened them again real soon. /I should bring him a gift. But what? I never was good at that, not even then and certainly not now./

But he soon decided on something very suitable and, after retrieving his present, made his way to Ecthelion’s rooms.

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“Where’s Elvil!”
Elsilá shook her head and sighed. “As if you haven’t been told already three times…. He is with your grandfather, Lord Elrond, for an examination. You were to sleep apart and no, you cannot stay up any longer. It is long past your bedtime already, my little prince.”
He pouted but smiled at her. “Oh, all right. But I am not tired.”
She smiled and tugged him in. “Then simply lay still; your body will rest that way.”
He snuffed. “But that’s boring and no fun at all. I’m not tired. I slept too much lately anyway.”
She sat down and placed a strand of hair behind his ear. “No, little prince, either you try to sleep or you rest, but are going to bed. And before you say anything, I can understand. Know what I always did when I was little and had to sleep, but wasn’t tired? I looked around the room, mostly just straight at my ceiling and I started imaging things. I created countries on it and kings that ruled it and such… Maybe you can try that?”
He frowned and considered it.

After she left he actually did give it a go, but he couldn’t concentrate. The blankets were too confining and he didn’t want to be in bed. He jumped out and, dragging his sheets with them, went to the balcony. For a while he stood there staring out in the dark night, but he soon decided he wanted another place and left.

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Orophin closed his eyes and smiled, remembering the last hour. He sat back up and ld atd at the door longingly. Elrohir had been summoned to aid Erestor with something and had left, but not without promising to continue when he was back and that he would hurry. And now the ‘Lóriën guard had trouble staying awake, though anticipation and desire went through him in huge waves. /Ro, hurry, please./

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Erestor shook his head and smiled. “What’s on your mind, Elrohir? You make one mistake after another.”
Elrohir blushed and shook his head. “I’m sorry, Erestor. It won’t happen again.”
Erestor laughed warmly. “That’s what you said the last fifteen times. Why don’t you tell me what it is? I might be able to help.”
Elrohir plunged down and sighed. “It’s nothing. Really. Just eager to return to Phin.”
Erestor’s eyebrow went up at that and he smiled knowing“I’d“I’d say you’d get there faster if you concentrate here. I would let you go if I could, but I’m afraid you’re the only help I’ve got at the moment. Sealbeth and Melpomean are both healing. Elladan needs to look after Elvil and Elrond is busy himself.”
Elrohir shrugged. “It’s all right. And I don’t mind, it’s just…”
Erestor laughed warmly. “You’re eager to get back to your lover.”

Elrohir’s eyes widened. “What? How?”
Erestor smiled. “I am the chief counsellor for a reason, pen-neth. And you just gave yourself away. Come, not much more.”
Elrohir nodded but didn’t start. “Erestor, please don’t tell others. Phin wants to keep it a secret for now.”
Erestor nodded. “Of course. If you ever need an ear, you can always come to me.”
Elrohir smiled gratefully. “Thank you. Times spent without him will be even harder than before. I never really realised how horrid it must be for you and Thrilmaldur. To be such close friends and that tight to different realms.”
Erestor smiled. “We go back a long way and knew how it would be from the start. And so do you and Orophin. You’ll make it work, don’t worry.”
Elrohir smiled and nodded, turning back to work, forcing himself to focus.

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Elrond smiled at the elf before him. “Well, I think I have some news for you.”
Elvil shook his head. “Ata.” It sounded warningly.
Elrond laughed at the tone, recognizing it from Elladan. “Eating Lembas will not harm you, though I strongly advice against it.” He raised his hand to stop the flow of words. “Even though it will kill the desire it also enhances the senses. And, considering the fact you stay here and do not go on patrol, your senses aren’t needed for alertness. Therefore, whether you will want it or not, your senses will naturally focus on what you want it to: Elladan. And thus countering the side-effect.”

Elvil groaned and lowered his head. “So I’m facing a quarter of a century of agony!”
Elrond smiled understandingly and placed a hand on his arm. “No. You will not, unless Elladan is determined to push you away that long.” Elvil looked at him surprised and Elrond smiled warmly. “It is as I thought. The spell, combined with the medallion’s magic, aged you. Not much, you are still not mature, but older than you were.” He smiled. “From what I can tell you now have the body of a forty year old.”

Elvil’s look of surprise grew and he shook his head. “So no matter what I do, I am Elnihir’s elder now? But that f wro wrong.”
Elrond sighed. “Only by five years, Elvil, and you were always more mature than he was.” He kneeled next to the boy. “There are several things you can do now. One: you can go on as things are, be forty and be Elvil. Two: you can return to your previous life. Three: you can try the Lembas, thoit wit will probably do nothing for you. But you cannot go back to the way things were. You are now a forty year old and even if I take your memory away it will not change your body back. And Glorfindel is right: the memories will only resurface later and more vigorously than they did now.”

Elvil sighed and nodded. “But how do we explain everything?”
Elrond nodded. “There’s nothing to explain. The elves that need to know, know.”
“No, I mean Elnihir. He will not understand. I hardly understand.”
Elrond smiled. “Only time will tell how he will take it, but I shall ask Legolas to keep an eye on him.” Elvil nodded and grinned.

“He’s a lot like you and Elrohir.”

Elrond raised his eyebrow and Elvil blushed. “I… I got jealous when I saw Legolas comfort Elladan and I just snapped, I guess. Elnihir hit me and calmly told me to behave, the way you or Elrohir would.”
Elrond laughed and smiled. “Well, that’s promising for the future.”

He hugged Elvil. “Why don’t you go, it is half an hour before your bedtime. Don’t waste it by sitting here.”
Elvil smiled. “I am very fortunate Onar brought me here. You are the best father I can have.”
Elrond smiled warmly at the compliment and hugged him again. “And you are a son to me as well. Whether you and Elladan work out or not. But that’s all in the future.”

He smiled as Elvil walked to the door and yelped. “Elvil, wait. I almost forgot.” He retrieved a letter from his desk. “Here, a letter from Lady Onardodya. She’s returning soon.”
Elvil’s eyes warmed. “I finally get to thank her for what she did. And she should go back again. She’ll never have a real life if she stays here.”
Elrond smiled but shook his head. “I do not agree, Elvil. You are her life, her son. She made her decision twenty five years ago. Her brothers returned but she stayed, for you. And Elnihir quickly claimed her maternal feelings as well.”
“But she doesn’t have children of her own. I know humans wish to see them wed and such but she’ll be dead long before either Elnihir or I even think of that.”
Elrond smiled and nodded, understanding his train of thoughts. “That’s not how she sees things, Elvil. She feels herself the most fortunate woman in the world. She looks upon you and Elnihir as her children. And yes, what you say is true, for most. But not her. She once said she would still be able to mother you when she was eighty. If she had gone back and married and gotten children, they would have grown up and left her and only occasionally she would have been able to look after her grandchildren. But with you and Elvil she has children that stay young for the duration of her life.”
Elvil’s eyes twinkled in understanding and happiness for her. “I understand ata. I’ve got to tell Elnihir she’s coming. He’ll like to know.”
Elrond nodded. “And I know you want to be the one to tell him. And please, if you see Legolas, hand him this note.” Elvil nodded and grabbed the paper before storming out.

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Ecthelion smiled and hurried to open the door. His eyes warmed when seeing Glorfindel stand on the threshold. “Please come in. I’ve bought some nice wine for us. Promise me you won’t drink anything more? I need you sober if we are to talk about Gondolin.”
Glorfindel nodded and promised. “And here, this is for you.”
Ecthelion unwrapped the gift and grinned when he saw the contends. “I’m surprised you remembered. It is beautiful, thank you.”
Glorfindel smiled. “And it changes colours if you turn this knob or if you hold it against the light, see.”

Ecthelion laughed when he saw the colours change as Glorfindel turned the knob at the side. “It’s really lovely, Glorfindel, thanks. I shall spend many hours watching it. What colours are in it? I see green, yellow, white, blue, red but also pink. Each time it’s a different colour.”
Glorfindel nodded. “It contains several sheets with blending varieties of just one colour. But if you hold it against the light the underlying colour, which you can alter with the other knob mixes with it.”
“Granting a endless number of possibilities. It is lovely. Thank you.”

He leaned in forward and pressed a gentle kiss on the Seneschal’s cheek, who could not help but blush at the contact and quickly averted his head. Ecthelion would have been surprised at that movement, but he wasn’t; he was too surprised by his own feelings flowing through him at the time.

He quickly sat down and poured in a glass. “Are you sure you do not mind? Erestor toldyou you don’t really like to talk about Gondolin.”
Glorfindel smiled at him, but shook his head. “That’s different. You were there.” He would not elaborate further and let Ecthelion explain his remark any way he wished to do.

He sipped his wine and continued to smile. “So, what do you want to talk about?”
Ecthelion shrugged. “Don’t know really. There’s so little I remember. Perhaps something common, or someone we both knew?”
Glorfindel nodded and started talking about the streets, shops and the surroundings. He wanted to wait talking about the elves till later. He was unsure what that would provoke in the other and he knew you could not rush the remembering.

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“Hee there, you are supposed to be asleep in your bed.”

Guiltily, Elnihir turned around and smiled when he saw Legolas standing before him. “I know, but I am not tired and I wanted to watch the stars. Is my great grandfather really up there?”
Legolas nodded and sat down. “Aye, he is. Do you know the tale?”
Elnihir shook his head and Legolas sighed, realising he now had to tell or the other would never stop asking.

He stood back up. “Come, if you really desire to remain awake, let us do so somewhere else, lest your father or grandfather find you here. What do you say to the roof?”
Elnihir jumped up, almost letting his blanket slip and nodded. He beamed when Legolas grabbed his hand and started walking.

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Elrond smiled when he walked into Melpomean’s room. The other was combing his hair and presenting Elrond with a highly sensual sight. Knowing the other would sense him soon he cleared his throat and stepped inside, closing the door behind him.

“I thought I might find you here. Are you all right?”
Melpomean smiled and nodded. “I had no idea when you would be done and I didn’t want to wait for you in your rooms.”
Elrond frowned. “Why not?” He smiled when the other blushed and he drew him close, kissing him tenderly. “I don’t care if someone would have found you naked in my room, melamin. Anyone may know I love you.”

Seeing the sadness descent on Melpomean, Elrond decided to change the subject. “You look smashing. Let me update you on the Elvil-front. He’s now a forty year old.”
Melpomean grinned. “Poor Elladan. Five years instead of twenty-five.”
Elrond raised his eyebrow. “Five?”
Melpomean nodded. “Aye. Do you really believe Elvil will wait ten?”
Elrond grinned and shook his head. “Nay, I guess not. But I do worry about Elnihir. Elrohir might react a little too protective now that Elvil will be preoccupied more and more.”

Melpomean shook his head and leaned in closer, claiming another kiss, both surprising and pleasing Elrond, who eagerly yielded, with his initiative. “I think Legolas’ presence will make up for it. Haven’t you noticed Elnihir’s favouritism towards our blond prince?”
Elrond nodded. “I have, but that’s only because Legolas was one of the nine.”
Melpomean frowned. “Perhaps that started it, but I no longer think that is the sole reason. Nay, I do believe he’s befriending him. He may even be the salvation Legolas needs.”
“Salvation? Elnihir? What did you see that I missed?”
Melpomean shrugged. “Don’t know. Not much anyway, with only one eye.” He smirked at his own humour. “But he spends more and more time with Legolas.”

Elrond sighed. “That might well be, but Legolas will soon tire of it. I should ask Elnihir to stop looking for him so much before it hunts him away.”
Melpomean shook his head. “Nay, you will not. Legolas seeks out Elnihir just as much and maybe even more. The little one’s company does him good; he makes him laugh, Elrond. When’s the last time Legolas laughed? Really laughed? Elnihir draws him from his shell. As does Legolas him.”
Now Elrond was really baffled. “Elnihir in a shell? What are you talking about?”
“His height, Elrond. He’s short, but not as short as he sees himself. Legolas will render that. He will take his mind of his height.”

Elrond groaned. “I don’t want to talk anymore. It is giving me a headache.” He pulled his love down on the bed. “Can I stay here?”
Melpomean nodded, his smile warming. “Aye.”

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Ecthelion stood in the window, watching the valley, shrouded in the dark night.
He wondered what was happening. The more Glorfindel told, the more images he saw, fitting in with the blond’s tale and adding to it. It hadn’t unnerved him… until he had seen Glorfindel.
Now he was at a loss. Those images had made his stomach summersault and he now stood in the window, trying to regain control over his breathing and body. But the images kept assaulting him and suddenly he couldn’t take it anymore.
He yelped as his knees gave way.

Glorfindel rushed forward and was just in time to catch the falling elf. “Ecthelion? Ecthelion, are you all right? What is wrong? Do you need rest?” His voice was filled with worry and even some of his love seeped through, which he had masterfully managed to conceal the whole evening.
Ecthelion’s breath came in gasps and he looked panicked. “Can’t breath.”

Glorfindel needed no further encouragement. He lifted the body of the floor and planted him on the bed. “Try to stay calm, I’m getting Elrond.”

He ran from the room as fast as his legs could carry him, meanwhile asking everybody where he could find Elrond. He had made it to Melpomean’s room in no time and ruffled on the door while he opened it and ran inside. “Elrond! Hurry! Ecthelion can’t breathe.”
Elrond was up and instantly came to life. “Melpomean, run to the healers, tell them I need athalas and the reviving herbs. Hurry.” He followed Glorfindel through the corridors, his robes fanning about his legs.

He gasped when he saw Ecthelion fighting for air. He sat down and smiled. “Try not to panic or to focus on your breathing. It will only aggravate if you do. Glorfindel, I need some water.”
Before he had even finished the sentence the seneschal’s hand already dangled before him, holding a glass of water. “Now, Ecthelion, I am going to make you drink this. Take one sip and swallow, then take a small breath, then another sip and so on.”

Ecthelion nodded, though his eyes were still filled with fear. But having the other two there was calming him down a bit. He had been petrified he would die. The drinking did the trick, it calmed him down and forced him to focus on something else enough to make his breath become normal.

Elrond smiled and gently lowered the elf back on the bedow, ow, what happened?”
Ecthelion shook his head and started trembling a little. He smiled at Glorfindel, who immediately placed a blanket around him. “I don’t know, Elrond. I just suddenly couldn’t bre any anymore.”
Glorfindel shrugged when Elrond looked at him. “It’s true. He suddenly fell down. We’ve been talking about Gondolin, can it be…”
Elrond smiled and nodded. “Ecthelion, where you seeing things? Images about…” He stopped when Ecthelion started laughing. “Elrond, no need to be careful or gentle. I remember. It started when I read books in the library. That’s why Glorfindel told me about Gondolin. I want to remember.” He sighed. “And I do.”

He smiled at Glorfindel. “You were the captain of the Golden Flower. And my bestest friend.”
Glorfindel nodded. “Aye.”
Elrond smiled. “Well, there’s your answer. You just remembered a bit too much at once.” /Aiya, I hope you will cope remembering your death./

Ecthelion smiled and nodded, thanking Elrond for his care, but his eyes remained locked with Glorfindel’s.

When Melpomean entered Elrond sighed relieved. He was starting to feel too much. “Ah, melamin, thank you, but it appears it’s not necessary. But I didn’t know that. Come, lets go and leave them alone. I feel quite too much in this room.”
Melpomean smiled. “Come on then.”
Elrond looked at him and smiled. “Your room or mine?”
Melpomean smiled. “Mine. My bed is smaller.”
Elrond grinned and lovingly scooped up his lover, kissing him when he started to blush.

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Glorfindel sat down and placed a strand of wayward hair behind Ecthelion’s ear. “Are you all right?” He wondered how much Ecthelion did remember. He wasn’t going to risk it.
Ecthelion nodded. “I am. But I fear remembering my death. It’s only logical to conclude I didn’t survive the attack. Or was I already dead?”
Glorfindel shook his head. “Nay. I watched you die during the attack.” /And I didn’t want to live without you and that death wish made me challenge that balrog. I never met you there./

Ecthelion smiled. “Poor Turgon. As proud as he was of Gondolin, I don’t think he would have built it had he known how it would be destroyed.”
Glorfindel smiled. “I do not regrettimetime there.”
Ecthelion smiled at him. “Granted, it was fun there, but still…” He closed his eyes to keep his tears inside. “I’m sorry for ruining your evening, glorthar.”

Glorfindel’s eyes lighted up with happiness and he couldn’t stop his happy tears from flowing down his cheeks. He shrugged when Ecthelion brushed them away, looking questioningly. “You called me Glorthar.”
Ecthelion’s frown became deeper. “Did I? Why? I called you that in Gondolin, I suppose.”
Glorfindel nodded, wiping his tears, that continued to flow, away, smiling giddily at his love.

Ecthelion frowned and studied Glorfindel. /I remember so much now and you are in most of them. Why do I have the feeling you were more to me than just my best friend?/ Suddenly he mentally kicked himself. /`Ecthelion`… I’m the one you were talking to, aren’t I, Glorfindel? I know I am, I must be. I was the only Ecthelion in Gondolin. But that means we were lovers./
He grinned. /Well, at least that explains why I am attracted to you. Lovers. Yes, I am starting to remember now./

Suddenly he gasped, screamed and grabbed Glorfindel with all the strength he had. The blond instantly sat down and pulled him close. He recognized the signals. “Ecthelion, this is Imladris. You are in Imladris. Focus on my voice.” Slowly the elf in his arms calmed down and passed out.

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Elrond shook his head. “I never said you weren’t right, but yes, seeing it with my own eyes does make it more real. But let’s not think or talk about any relative of mine, or anything else tonight.” He ruthlessly dragged Melpomean along. “Let Legolas care for him tonight and fight Ro in the morning.” He should never have left the room. Next time his lover wanted to watch the stars they would go outside.

Legolas grinned when he heard the words. He had pretended to be asleep and smiled now that were once again alone. “Don’t you worry, Elnihir, I will not allow anything or anyone to hurt you.” He pulled the little sleeping elf closer and settled down for the night.

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Ecthelion flared up and looked around dazed. Then he smiled, recognizing his surroundings. “Now I finally know why I was always afraid. Not of the unknown, but subconsciously I must have feared not finding you. We really were lovers.”
Uncaring about anything he ruthlessly clamed Glorfindel’s lips in a passionate kiss. Slowly awareness returned to the blue orbs he loved so much in the past and even more in the present. “Wake up, Glortharnya.”

Glorfindel smiled at him but worry and anxiety marred his features. “I love you, ever since my first breakfast here, when you told me about coffee, remember?”
Glorfindel nodded, and couldn’t help but feel a little sense of disappointment. Echtelion smiled and blanketed his lover. “Why didn’t you tell me we were lovers? Did I do this to you? Reduce you to a drunk that needs the bottle?”
Glorfindel sighed relieved and pulled him as close as possible, claiming those lovely lips. “Nay, I did that myself. I couldn’t live without you, it was too painful, but I couldn’t die. There was no balrog this time. And I didn’t even see you there.”
Ecthelion released some fresh tears. “My fault. The moment I entered his halls I begged Mandos to remove my memory. I didn’t want to remember us, or you. It would have been to painful. He must have kept you away to spare you.”
Glorfindel nodded and pulled him closer still. “Let’s not talk about that. We’ve got a future together again.”
Ecthelion nodded and rested his head on his chest. “Aye. Together. Forever.”

End chapter 46
TBC
Glorthar means golden warrior.