Awakenings

Part 20.B.


Glorfindel narrowed his eyes as yet another scribe, warrior and maiden approached his beloved and asked for his hand in a dance. He had received his fare share of requests himself, but he couldn’t help feel possessive and on guard as Erestor received so much attention. It was understandable really, Erestor was, in his eyes, at any time of day or night, breathtakingly beautiful, but this evening he had outdone himself. He had made no drastic changes to his attire, just small things. Such as wearing his hair differently, with small sparkly beads entwined into the dark mass. Instead of his black robes, he wore dark navy blue velvet that, much to Glorfindel’s chagrin, was less concealing of the advisor’s lithe figure than his other sombre robes. He was stunning, and Glorfindel sighed as he gazed upon his lover.

His cheeks reddened slightly as Erestor intercepted his longing look and smiled knowingly at the warrior. Glorfindel stood up straight from where he had been leaning against one of the pillars, and watched as Erestor steadily sauntered over to his lover. It was no secret that there was something between them, and it amused him how others seemed to try and figure out their exact relationship. But there was little left for one to interpret as Erestor reached up and kissed him sweetly upon the lips and wrapped his arms around the warrior’s waist, staking his obvious claim.

“I believe this is the first Yule in many a year I have enjoyed so much,” he mumbled happily into the blond’s neck.

“Aye, all is perfection this year. The decorations, the music, friends and family. You.” He wrapped his arms around Erestor’s shoulders and rested his cheek on silken dark hair. All was perfect. Yet he sensed an unease in his lover, he leaned back and observed the almost sad expression on the advisor’s face.

“Erestor? What is wrong?”

“Look, Glorfindel…” Erestor nodded over to a lonely corner of the hall.

There stood an Elfling, looking impossibly sad. The little girl’s chin trembled as she looked down at her dress sadly and back up to where all other Elflings danced in pairs. Her face was hidden behind golden ringlets, she wiped at her eyes quickly before squaring her shoulders and clutching her hands behind her back as she waited to be asked to dance. But her chin continued to tremble.

Glorfindel felt his heart expand for the small she elf. He looked to his lover, however, when Erestor pulled from his arms, and seemed to be looking for something.

“Erestor, what are you doing?”

The advisor smiled as he reached for one of the decorations and pulled loose one of the long stemmed lilies.

“I will be right back, my love. I must go make a little girl smile.” With a kiss to Glorfindel’s cheek he made his way across the hall. The warrior watched with a fond and somewhat proud smile as Erestor crossed the hall.

Erestor came to stand before the small Elfling who blushed and suddenly grew incredibly shy.

“Hello, my fair lady, what might your name be?” he asked with a gentle smile.

“My name is Lara,” she replied quietly, fiddling nervously with the front of her dress.

Erestor smiled, it seemed that they were kindred spirits.

“Well, Lara, may I have the honour of dancing with you?” Erestor bowed and presented the flower to the young girl, just as all the other young boys had with the other she elves. The young girl covered her instant smile with her hand, after regaining some poise, she let her hand fall back to her side, and nodded her head yes.

“I would like that very much, Councilor Erestor,” she replied quietly.

Erestor was surprised and impressed that a child of her age knew of his title, let alone his name. He again bowed and offered her his hand. When the smaller delicate hand slipped into his own he led her to where the other Elflings danced, fighting down an embarrassed blush when noticing that he was taller than all the other dancers by at least three feet. Being a perfect gentleman he leaned down somewhat awkwardly as he held her by the hand and small waist; all traces of her tears disappeared and the young girl smiled brightly.

Soon enough all others had backed away from the unique couple and watched them dance. Lara beamed the entire time as she noticed the other girls’ envious and impressed stares, but mostly she felt special because she had finally been asked to dance. She giggled as Erestor twirled her under his arm, and finally, when the music came to an end Erestor bowed before his partner and kissed her hand, giving her a wink and a handsome smile.

“Thank you, Lara, you are a wonderful dancer,” he said so that others heard his endearment.

“Thank you, Erestor,” she whispered, on tip toes she reached up and kissed the advisor upon the cheek, blushing furiously at her boldness. Erestor smiled adoringly at the innocence in the nervous kiss to his cheek. With one more smile he turned to look for his lover who seemed to have disappeared, smiling at how, as soon as he had left the floor, all the other she elves swarmed around Lara in admiration.

~*~

Glorfindel covered his mouth as he laughed at the scene before him. He was not alone as other grown elves beside him sighed and expressed how thoughtful and sweet it was of the advisor to do such a thing. He watched as the young she elf’s eyes practically glowed as she was swirled and treated like a princess, though from the corner of his eye something else caught his attention. He watched with a curious expression as Elladan ran from the hall, tears streaming down his cheeks, with Elrohir in hot pursuit. With a worried expression, he headed out after them.

~*~

Elladan sighed as he sat behind one of the flowing drapes, hiding from the many young she elves that insisting on dancing with him. He did not wish to miss the festivities, but he also did not wish to dance anymore, he much preferred dancing with his brother. It was just at that moment when thinking of his brother that Elrohir came into view.

Elrohir was straining his neck in search of his brother, he spotted Elladan peering, with a smile, from behind one of the drapes and thought to join his brother in the excellent hiding place, when a young she elf appeared before him.

“Dance with me, Elrohir?”

“Uh…I, I have no more flowers, I’m afraid.”

“That’s alright, I just wish to dance with you.”

“All-all right, I guess.”

Elrohir held out his hand but was surprised as the young she elf attached herself to him, hugging his middle as she rested her head against his chest. He stood there for a few moments with a wide eyed expression, totally at a loss as to what to do. He looked over to Elladan, who seemed equally as shocked. Seeing no help was to come from his brother, Elrohir slowly brought his hands to rest gently against the young girl’s back. Feeling as uncomfortable as he looked, he gently began to sway.

An entire lifetime seemed to pass before the music finally ended; he had not noticed Elladan’s glare or the young girl’s flicker of lashes. He was about to thank his partner for the dance, as his Nana had always told him to, when he was taken by surprise as she tilted her head up and pressed her lips to his. He stood frozen on the spot, completely paralysed with shock. Finally the young girl released her hold on him and stepped back with a furious blush, waiting for Elrohir to say something.

“Uh…thank you?” was all he could think of to say. That was without a doubt the oddest thing he had ever experienced, and was not sure that he cared for it much.

The young girl smiled brilliantly and with a giggle turned and left to find her friends. Still feeling rather dazed Elrohir turned back to again find his brother, and was, once more that evening, surprised at what he saw. Elladan stood there, fists clenched at his sides, with a fierce scowl and tears running down his cheeks.

“Elladan?” He stepped towards his brother, but Elladan fled, out of the hall and into the gardens. “Elladan!” Nearly knocking over those in his path, Elrohir ran after his brother.

Elladan did not know why seeing that girl kiss his brother had angered him so, neither did he know why it had hurt, but he knew he had to run away. He did not wish for anyone to see him at that moment, as hot tears fell down his cheeks.

When a safe distance from the gathering, Elladan sat himself beneath an old willow tree, one he and Elrohir loved to climb and hide in. He hugged his knees and hiccupped as he pictured Elrohir with the girl. He was so lost in his own sobs that he did not realize Elrohir was beside him until his brother had wrapped his arms around him.

“Elladan, what is wrong? Why are you crying?” When Elladan did not answer, kept crying and even try to pull away, he continued. “Are you angry with me? Why?”

“You kissed that girl!” Elladan accused as he wiped at his eyes with the back of his sleeve.

“She kissed me!”

“That doesn’t matter; you were still kissing!”

“But…Elladan…” He tried touching his brother’s shoulder again, and bit his lip as Elladan shrugged away from the touch. “I did not even want her to kiss me! She just did it!”

“Did…did you like it?” Elladan glanced back at Elrohir with large wet eyes, his mouth in a firm downward bow shape.

“No! I didn’t! I did not ask her to kiss me honestly. Elladan…why are you upset about her kissing me?” he whispered. Elladan looked away and shrugged, not truly knowing himself.

“I don’t know...” he began quietly, “…I just didn’t want her to kiss you; I don’t want anyone to kiss you.”

“Why? Is this because I was kissed before you were?”

“No!” Elladan replied in indignation. “I just…you are mine ‘Ro, mine.”

They were quiet for a few moments, neither quite knowing what to say, and both thoroughly confused. Chewing his bottom lip, Elrohir moved to sit closely in front of his brother.

“Elladan?” he whispered, touching his brother’s knees and moving them so as they did not obstruct the view of his brother’s face. Elladan allowed him to move him so, but kept his sad gaze directed at the ground.

“Elladan?” Elrohir tried again, and when Elladan looked up, Elrohir was but mere inches before his face.

Elrohir smiled sweetly, and pressed his lips to his brother’s. It was an innocent kiss, lips closed and pressed softly together. Elladan had been taken by surprise, at first, but eventually closed his eyes. When they pulled apart, they looked at each other nervously before both smiled and giggled.

“That was much better than kissing that girl,” Elrohir whispered.

“Elrohir?”

“Yes, ‘Dan?”

“I love you, you’re my best friend.”

“I love you too.” Elrohir leaned forwards and drew his brother into a loving hug. When they pulled apart they kneeled, facing each other, simply staring and smiling at their mirror image.

“Please don’t kiss anyone else, Elrohir,” Elladan whispered.

“I won’t.”

Elladan quirked his brow as his brother then held out his little finger.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re making a promise, this is what you do when you make a big, big promise that you can never break. Hold out your little finger, like mine.”

Elladan grinned at his brother’s silliness and did as he was bid. He giggled as Elrohir than hooked their fingers together.

“A promise, ‘Dan, to be best friends forever, to be…to be, everything to each other, forever.”

Elladan smiled and pulled his brother into another hug.

“Love you, ‘Ro.”

“Love you, ‘Dan.”

Little did the boys know, but a dear friend and tutor has just witnessed what had passed between the brothers with, at first, apprehension and concern, then adoring protectiveness. They were still unaware of the blond’s presence even as Glorfindel’s eyes went wide, as he clutched at his chest, breathing hard and fell to his knees as vivid flashes of the missing parts of his life flashed before his eyes with stunning intensity.

A picture of Erestor and himself, in the shadow of the palace flashed before him. Erestor, pushed against the wall with his legs resting over the warrior’s shoulders as he was swallowed whole with an intensity that made the advisor scream, mirrored by another scream of pleasure not to far off in the shadows.

The image before his eyes shifted, and then changed completely. Still in Gondolin, he was now looking down at the city as the branches of a willow swung lazily before him in a warm summer’s breeze. He was sitting with his back against a great willow tree, with Erestor comfortably nestled in his arms. They stared out at the dark orange sky, watching the approaching sunset. He could hear Erestor giggle as the advisor squirmed away, only to be pulled back by himself and held closely. It was a perfect, beautiful moment, such a tiny precious moment that fitted perfectly into a small, empty, waiting space in his heart.

The next image that flashed before his eyes made tears run hotly down his cheeks as he watched the scene play out. This particular memory came to him painfully clear and accurately. Fire and destruction surrounded them, yet it was a quiet hum in the background as Erestor stood before him, clinging and begging; pleading with him not to leave, not to go where he would not allow him to follow. Each word rang in his ears with deafening clarity.

**~**~**

His arms shook as he held Erestor tightly, his eyes closed and tears fell silently as Erestor already moaned in anguish of what was to come. And then he saw it, he saw his fate, a Balrog with a fiery whip and sword. He tried to pull away from Erestor, but his beloved began to scream as he did so. No words in particular, just noise, screams of pure terror and denial. Eventually he managed to hold Erestor’s face firmly in front of him, his heart breaking at the wide brown eyes reflecting pure agony and begging in vain for some other option.

“It’s only good bye for a little while, not forever.”

He could tell Erestor was trying desperately to say something, but he shook too badly, everything was happening too fast for him. Where as strangely, for Glorfindel, everything seemed to be in slow motion. Eventually he managed to speak, but all he could say was one word, desperately, over and over again.

“No, no, no, no, no, no, NO! NO! NO!NO!”

Cupping his small quivering chin he managed to still Erestor’s shaking form for a few moments.

“Erestor, you remember the promises we made to each other?”

A shaky nod.

“All will be fulfilled. You must live and I must die.”

Again Erestor began his screaming and protesting but Glorfindel held him firmly and forced him to regain some semblance of control for their last few moments together.

“You promised me you would live, I hold you to that, And I swear to you, Erestor, I *swear* that I will return.”

“J-just let me come with you, p-please...”

“No, Erestor. We will love in life not death. And I can not bear for you to die, for if you did, then everything, everything I have fought for here, today, was in vain. You swore to me you would live. You must do this for me, for that is the only way I can do this. Let me die an honourable death, I beg you.”

“But…I can not wait to sail, if, if I live, then I am needed here...”

“Precisely, and I swore to you I would find a way back. I will, I will find a way back to Arda. And we will live and love. Until then remember our happiest moments, remember our first kiss, remember reading to me under blue skies beneath the old oak, until I return to build new memories with you.”

Erestor could only nod, holding on to the arms that held the sides of his head firmly as their brows touched, the beast in the background looming closer and closer.

“One last kiss.” The warrior whispered, and shakily touched their lips together.

“This is not the end.” He whispered into Erestor’s ear, before forcefully pushing him away.

‘I love you’ was mouthed by Erestor who could not find his voice.

Glorfindel took one last look at his beloved. There was no fear in his eyes, because he was dying so that his love could live. He squared his shoulders, picked up the sword he had not realized he had dropped, and turned.

When he fell, it was with relief in knowing that the beast had fallen also. Whilst death consumed him, his mind was not filled with images of fire and darkness, but with a picture of two young boys, beneath an old oak sharing a first innocent kiss. He was the only soldier that day to die with a smile upon his lips. He did not hear the enraged screams of the young elf he fell in love with so long ago, and he did not see him being dragged away to safety. What next he saw was mist and fog, extinguishing the pain and fire, before someone, something so mighty and knowing took him into their arms and through the cooling fog.


**~**~**

He could barely breathe; he had remembered small snippets of his death before, the pain and smoke. But never had he recalled such pain, not the physical aspect, but the pain of seeing Erestor scream and beg, the pain of leaving Erestor, uncertain of how, but defiant on returning. The pain of leaving his sweet Erestor alone, with none but his grief to keep him company.

He moaned as other images assailed him, images of the Halls of Waiting. He could not make out the form of the great being, who he knew to be the Valar of Death, but he felt his power. He remembered hollering, screaming to be released, he remembered Ecthelion pleading with his last breath for Glorfindel to be returned, he remembered his blatant refusal to heal, his refusal to abide by the natural ways of healing, his refusal to succumb to the cool fog that wanted only to ease his burns. And he remembered hearing the reasons for his necessary loss of memory, finally understanding why it was he did not, could not have remembered Erestor to begin with.

He lay face down in the garden, breathing heavily, his brow covered with sweat as he rolled onto his side and closed his eyes tightly. One last memory, the last piece of the puzzle of his fuzzy and unclear memory was falling into place. The final and one of the most important of all memories. For though created from love and pure innocence, that single promise shaped his and Erestor’s fate. They were in his rooms….

**~**~**

Glorfindel smiled at his friend, there was no limit to the love he felt for his closest friend. Kneeling up he pulled his leggings back up to cover himself before pulling Erestor into arms to help wipe away his mess and for a loving hug. He pulled away only slightly so as to rest their brows together. Erestor looked to him with a bemused expression when he held out his little finger, waiting for something.

“What are you doing?” Erestor giggled.

“We are making a pact, ‘Fin and ‘Res style,” he stated proudly, making Erestor’s smile widen. “Hold out your little finger like I have.”

When Erestor mimicked Glorfindel’s actions the blond hooked their fingers together, and smiled at Erestor, their brows still leaning together.

“A promise, to be each other’s firsts, to never forget our bond that no one but us can understand, and to being best friends. Forever.”

“Forever,” Erestor whispered.

Both still smiled faintly, but took their pact seriously, simply looking into each other’s eyes, and engraving the moment into their memories for all time.

**~**~**

Finally he managed to pull himself to his feet; he leaned heavily upon the bark of a tree as he panted and wiped the tears from his face. He remembered everything. He knew who he was with an unfathomable certainty. Everything finally made sense and fit into place, his soul and heart were whole entirely. Whole, yet wanting and waiting, waiting for his beloved. A slow smile covered his face as a choked sob of joy left his lips. He had endured the hardships; any pain and prolonged torture of wishing and waiting was over. He had paid his dues, and now it was time for him to live. He knew with blissful, undeniable knowledge that the rest of his life would be devoted to love and pleasure.

After managing to stand up on his own, without support of a tree…he glanced at the tree he had been leaning upon, noting the irony with a smile that it was an old tall oak tree. He took a few more deep breaths and straightened his tunic. He glanced through the leaves and noted the twins were now gone and had never noticed his presence. He laughed, a joyous, hearty laugh; Erestor and he must be, without a doubt, the oldest virgins to walk Arda. Shaking his head, still chuckling to himself he made his way back to his own rooms. He had preparations to make, and then he would send for Erestor.

~*~*~*~*~

Erestor had been searching for Glorfindel the entire evening and was about to check the gardens when he was approached by one of the house staff.

“Master Erestor, I have come to deliver a message to you. Lord Glorfindel bids you to meet him in his rooms, urgently.”

“Did he say what it was about?” he asked with a worried frown.

“Nay, councilor.”

“Very well, thank you.” With a nod he passed the house attendant and left for the warrior’s rooms.

He did not knock; he had grown accustomed to simply letting himself into Glorfindel’s rooms, as Glorfindel had his. When catching sight of the flickering lights he paused in his steadfast stride and stood with mouth open as he observed his surroundings. He smiled when realizing Glorfindel had turned his rooms to a private haven. He closed the doors behind him and called for his lover.

“Glorfindel, you sneak, where are you?” he giggled.

“I am right here, love.”

Erestor turned to see Glorfindel coming out from the bathroom, wearing nothing but his leggings and carefully holding two large lit candles in his hands. He watched as Glorfindel placed one on either side of the bed, along with what must have been a hundred other candles. When the warrior turned, Erestor’s breath caught in his throat, and heat pooled in his loins. The low lighting flickered and played against Glorfindel’s golden skin, casting shadows across his heavily muscled form.

“Glorfindel?” he whispered. A shiver ran through him as Glorfindel slowly, and with obvious purpose known only to himself at that moment, advanced towards him. He opened his mouth to again speak but was silenced as Glorfindel pulled him towards him by a hand at the nape of Erestor’s neck, and engaged Erestor in a deep and dominating kiss. He was swept up into the warrior’s arms and gasped when his lips were finally released.

“What is this?” his voice trembled. There was more to this than Glorfindel simply being playful. He giggled as Glorfindel laughed with unrestrained joy and spun him around in his arms.

“I have a gift for you.”

“You do?” Erestor grinned, he watched as Glorfindel dashed over to one of his chest of drawers to retrieve something after having set Erestor back on his feet.

With an excited grin Glorfindel presented Erestor with a small box. Erestor had chuckled softly when realizing what it was, for he had watched the Elflings of Imladris engage in this age old tradition but a few hours ago.

“You know, the last time I received one of these, some very insolent and rather horrible young boys put a piece of coal in my box. But then this…handsome, charming, all round loveable blond haired heir of the Golden Flower gave me a gift that chased away my tears.”

“The toy soldier,” Glorfindel answered, again wrapping his hands around Erestor’s waist as the advisor curiously turned the box over in his hands.

“Actually, I was going to say my first kiss, but it was I who gave you *your* first kiss now that I think on it,” he laughed.

“Indeed, you brazen young thing. Are you going to open it?”

Erestor had to giggle at the almost childish excitement the warrior expressed, there was definitely something different about Glorfindel. Carefully he opened the box and peered inside.

“GLORFINDEL!”

The warrior threw his head back and laughed, as he moved away from the advisor, taking in, with much mirth and pleasure, the councilor’s reaction. Erestor stood before him with a playful glare, though giggling helplessly as he held up a plastic yellow duck.

“I know you have an affinity for the tiny creatures,” he chuckled, backing away as Erestor stalked towards him. “Give it a little squeeze!”

Erestor paused and looked at his new bathroom toy; he squeezed the toy and closed his eyes with a groan as it made a loud squeak.

“You can call him Squeaky!” the warrior chuckled. He peered down at the petite elf as Erestor came to stand before him with a dangerous grin.

“Aye, and everyone will hear the repeated squeaks as I beat you with it!”

Erestor lunged to, in fact, beat Glorfindel with the small yellow plastic duck, but Glorfindel quickly dodged him and actually managed to hoist Erestor over his shoulder. He chuckled as the squeak that sounded in his ear did not come from this new gift. He patted the councilor’s behind before gently lowering Erestor onto the middle of the satin sheet covered bed. He grinned down at Erestor as he straddled the bemused advisor’s hips and plucked the duck from his grip and set it aside. He smiled blissfully as Erestor reached up with a curious frown and brushed his cheek.

“Something is different.”

“Aye, it is. Look at me, Erestor, can you see it?” he asked excitedly.

Erestor leaned up on his hand as he continued to gently touch his lover’s face, a look of curious concentration, mingled with hope and fear, passed over his face. Glorfindel cupped the advisor’s face with his hands and leaned their brows together.

“See me, Erestor, see the boy you fell in love with so many years ago. For I am he, I am here. Not the shell of the best friend and beloved that was returned to you, I am who I have always been….I remember, Erestor, everything, I remember.” He finished with a whisper.

“W-what? But how…what…I don’t understand how…”

“One thing triggered it. I had to see it happen again, Erestor, in an honest, true and innocent form; I had to see it again to remember who I am. I had to see a promise made, an oath, made by two innocents, a promise of love made by two star crossed youngsters, who are destined for hardships and trial. I had to see it to remember, Erestor.” He was shaking with pure elation and had a blissful countenance.

Erestor gasped as Glorfindel held up his smallest finger in offering, smiling a smile that when coming to Imladris, Glorfindel had never truly mastered or achieved until now. A smile that his Glorfindel of Gondolin, his best friend and intended used to smile.

A choked sob left the advisor’s lips as he wrapped his own finger around Glorfindel’s. He smiled through his tears as Glorfindel brought their small symbol of love and oaths to his lips to gently kiss.

“Now I know why you always kissed the littlest twice,” he whispered.

Erestor simply nodded his head yes, his shoulders shaking as small desperate sounds left his mouth, though happy tears streamed his cheeks.

“Shhh now, all is well. I am here, I have travelled far for you and I am here. You weep now if you need to, I will hold you, and tell you what happened during our separation, and why it was I did not remember you.”

They lay there for a long while, until the moon was riding high in the sky and the stars bright. They had both shed silent tears, and Erestor had been taking in everything Glorfindel had said with wide eyed awe. Glorfindel had defied the ways of their kind and their masters; he had defied the Valar of Death for him.

They both lay silently on their sides, their gaze unbreakable as both smiled with pure contentment and peace.

“Ecthelion,” Erestor said with obvious fondness and love.

“Aye, always he has aided us. A true friend he is.”

“Again I am in his debt; I wish I could tell him how much I love him. How grateful I am for having met him, for having had his friendship and loyalty,” Erestor sighed.

“In Valinor, my love, he will be content with greeting us on the white shores, hand in hand, as bonded mates. He would want for nothing more.”

“Bonded?” Erestor hid part of his face in the pillow he rested on as he looked at Glorfindel with a blissful smile. Glorfindel laughed adoringly and pulled Erestor into his arms, letting his nose gently touch Erestor’s.

“Aye, bonded,” he confirmed.

“You have filled the room with candles.” Erestor spoke softly.

“Aye.”

“You have filled the room with flowers.”

“Aye.”

“You have laid satin sheets upon a soft bed.”

“Aye.”

“Just as you promised.”

“Aye.”

“Glorfindel?”

“Yes, my love?”

“Bond with me.”

“Aye, my love.”

Erestor pulled Glorfindel to him, and as he rolled onto his back he pulled Glorfindel along with him so that the warrior lay above him and between his legs. Dark hair was brushed back as light hair fell forwards, their lips met and both sighed, each could feel something within them tingle and shimmer. They could feel their very souls stir with anticipation and readiness at finally being granted the ability to reach out to its mate, to fuse and bind.

Though they had come far, and waited long, they did not rush. They knew they had the rest of forever to bask in each others perfection. Erestor smiled at his lover as Glorfindel slowly disrobed him. As they both lay in their leggings Erestor let his hands trail down the muscular back to rest upon the waistband of his lover’s leggings. Slowly he pushed them over the mounds of Glorfindel’s perfectly formed backside; Erestor felt his already hard length throb and tighten at the sight.

Never taking his eyes from Erestor, Glorfindel aided the advisor in removing his leggings. He then eagerly, yet still gently and with barely controlled movements, pushed down the advisor’s. When both were finally naked Glorfindel lay himself back down between Erestor’s spread legs and let their bodies reach out and touch each other.

Both sighed and moaned softly as heated skin touched and grafted itself to its partner’s. They rocked gently as they kissed, hands touching everywhere as if it were for the first time. Erestor opened his eyes when Glorfindel’s lips were no longer upon his own, seeing Glorfindel look down at him as he was, he knew without words what the warrior was asking, and he silently nodded his assent.

Glorfindel touched their lips together once more, both smiling into the kiss before they again momentarily parted. He reached over to a side drawer next to his bed and pulled it open. He pulled out the small vial of oil, his fingers finding it instantly. He paused a moment, to turn the duck that had been facing the bed away, knowing he could not make love to Erestor with a plastic yellow duck watching, and mostly to hear Erestor laugh at his silliness.

But seriousness gripped them.

“I love you, Erestor, and I will be yours forever. I bind myself to you, my intended, my love. We will pass through this world, the next and all the others to come, together, fused, melded and bound as one, my love, my life.”

“I love you, Glorfindel, you who has defied all worldly good and evil to reach me, your intended, your love. And for you I have lived, and waited. We will pass through this world, the next and all to come together, fused, melded and bound as one, my love, my life.”

They kissed, tendrils of their souls like a white light visibly reaching out desperately to connect with its mate as their lips again parted. Foreplay was not needed, for this was not play. This was a joining. Glorfindel kissed his way down Erestor’s body, worshiping his lover. He knelt between Erestor’s legs, and uncorked the vial.

Erestor spread his legs apart and presented his lover, the other part of his being, his entrance, the still virginal place where, through the most intimate of acts, they would join and remain connected for all eternity.

Glorfindel slicked his digits, the first slid in with ease, for this was something they had practiced many a time. But when it came to the second digit, they looked at each other, realizing that this would be the furthest, the closest yet that they had come to what it was they had desired for so long. Slowly and as gently as possible Glorfindel slid in the second digit, resting his cheek against the inside of Erestor’s thigh as he watched his lover, checking for any sign of discomfort, though Erestor smiled back at him, and raised his hips, pleading for more. A third digit was entered and Erestor did let out a small hiss; Glorfindel’s hand immediately stilled. When Erestor opened his eyes, he actually laughed.

“My love, by now I think it obvious that to gain the truly beautiful, most passionately hoped and longed for release, one must bear the pain to gain the pleasure. Please…don’t stop. Never stop. I need it.”

Glorfindel gently rotated his digits, always watching his beloved, though what Erestor had said was all too true, he still would not willing cause him pain if he could prevent it. And then Erestor bucked, he moaned, he arched and writhed. He was ready.

Coating his own painfully hard arousal Glorfindel positioned himself at his lover’s entrance. Twining their fingers together Glorfindel held their hands at the sides of Erestor’s head. Resting their brows together he took a deep breath and slowly pushed forwards.

Erestor gasped and his mouth fell open in surprise. Their skin crackled, white light flickered across their bodies in what could have been passed off as a trick of the candle light, were it not for the sensation of rolling, beaming and consuming magic that accompanied it.

Erestor let out a wide-eyed cry as he was finally filled. Glorfindel let go of the breath he had been holding. They stayed that way for a moment, trying to rein the intense sensations that shook their cores.

Still feeling somewhat dazed, Glorfindel smiled as he felt Erestor’s legs wrap around him, he smiled feeling Erestor’s chest heave beneath his own, and he smiled seeing the shock and wonder in his lover’s eyes. He pressed his lips to Erestor’s, gasping as white light blinded their vision behind closed lids. When they parted, Erestor thrust his hips upwards giving permission, permission to be claimed in every way possible, permission to bind their hearts that rang indescribably yet beautifully. In a symphony of prayer and worship, in a melody of searching and longing, in a cry of exquisite rightness and perfection. This was where their lives had led them, what their trials and grievances, their every struggle had led them to. To a peace, a oneness that could never have been achieved in any other way. These two creatures, born as white light had been spilt in two before their creation, and were now finally joined as they had always meant to be.

Slowly Glorfindel pulled out, and even slower, pushed back in. Erestor breathed in unison with the thrusts, their sighs echoed as one. Glorfindel moved above him, inside him, in a steady and slow rhythm, never breaking eye contact.

Erestor began to whimper, a delicious bliss building up where their bodies connected. His head lolled from side to side, words of no meaning spilled from his lips as he was claimed. He raised his hips with each thrust, he arched clear off the bed, as Glorfindel found, crafted and wielded his every pleasure in his giving. Tears descended his cheeks, tears of intense pressure and need.

Glorfindel slowly licked the tear track up to the dark pools of rippling pleasure that were Erestor’s eyes, where he kissed each lid.

“Your tears…are my tears,” he rasped out.

Glorfindel growled, he cried out like a wild animal, he panted ferociously, he began to whimper and moaned helplessly, his strength and willpower slipping from him. He bit into his lip, desperate to keep his hips from ramming into his lover as he slowly picked up their speed of thrusting. He did not realize that blood dripped down his chin until it was slowly licked away, and when Erestor reached the bruised and broken lip, he kissed it, tasting the tang of blood in his mouth.

“Your blood…is my blood,” he breathed.

“Too much, it’s too much…” Glorfindel wept.

When Erestor pulled his hands free of Glorfindel’s hold he quickly held Glorfindel around his middle, supporting his lover who wept and panted. Glorfindel ran his fingers through pitch black hair, pulling it away from Erestor’s flushed face as he leaned on his forearms and moved his hips farther, deeper.

“It’s alright, more…do it….” Erestor panted as he let one hand grasp one of the blond’s cheeks tightly, and pushed Glorfindel into him deeper. “Fill me….please…I beg you…”

Glorfindel groaned loudly, so loudly. He pushed himself up on one arm, letting his other trail down Erestor’s side, grasping Erestor’s hip as he pushed farther, deeper, harder. With their brows still pressed together their breaths clashed in heated tandem.

“Your breath…” Glorfindel began in a pant.

“…Is my breath,” Erestor finished desperately.

Glorfindel cried out, his eyes were closed tightly in the exquisite pain. Erestor clutched at his lover, needing a deeper penetration, needing to push them tightly into each other, until there was nothing left but one single perfect love.

“Ai, Ai, Ai! Oh Erestor! Erestor! ERESTOR!” He plunged deeper; he needed more, he needed it all.

“Take me, Glorfindel! Now! Let go, fill me, tear me, rip me, I want all of it, all of you, hurt me and pleasure me, I need you! Ai, GLORFINDEL!” he screamed.

And Glorfindel did as his body, and Erestor’s, told him. He threw his head back, and pushed as hard as he could, his scream lost in Erestor’s mouth. He pumped his hips into Erestor’s tight and steaming hot body. Erestor arched beneath him, and came with a scream of his name, yet he kept thrusting, wildly and with abandon.

“Oh help me, help me…” Erestor whimpered, clinging to his lover for dear life. Again he arched and screamed, spilling himself a second time, white light crackling violently around them, but unheeded.

“Oh Erestor…Erestor…help me, I can’t...get…deep enough, I love you…love you…love…”

“Let go, I want it…it all…” Erestor begged, his hands grasping desperately at the slippery back.

“I’m coming…I’m coming…” He gasped, thrusting wildly. He desperately pressed their brows together, needing to see deep into his lover, as deep as he felt. He felt his climax rapidly approaching, but before his own blissful release came to him, Erestor arched beneath him once more.

“Oh, gods, oh, oh, oh! Oh! I…I…I’m…I….” With eyes wide and mouth open he arched clear off of he bed and screamed his lover’s name as he came for a third time. He clenched down on the hard rod inside of him, falling helplessly and limply back onto the bed.

The tight heat that spasmed around his length undid him. Glorfindel screamed his pleasure, closed his eyes tight and held onto Erestor desperately. He tensed, thrust once more brutally into the tight heat and with a final cry of Erestor’s name he filled his lover with his seed. His come burst violently from the slit of his length, splashing hotly against Erestor’s insides. It seemed to last forever, he came and came, and came again. Even as his length was still buried deep inside of his lover, his white seed leaked and spilled out around his shaft and onto the satin sheets. A ripple spread unnoticed through the air, a soft sigh blew the leaves of the surrounding trees of Imladris as a love was realized and affirmed, two souls born as one, were finally united.


He collapsed onto Erestor, panting harshly and weeping uncontrollably.

“Shhh, baby, I’m here, I’ve got you.” Erestor whispered as he shakily brought his arms up and around his lover, holding him as tightly as he could as Glorfindel wept onto his shoulder.

The stars for a moment shone brilliantly, and across the great sea, in the west two figures sat beneath a large and grand oak tree on one of the many rolling, beautiful hills of Valinor. They watched amazed as the stars blazed, and one slowly stood, a smile spreading across his face. He wept and threw his arms in the air; he cried his joy to the world. He pulled his partner to his feet and danced wildly. Ecthelion rejoiced for his friends; he twirled Garon wildly in his arms as they both sang of the wonders of the world. All was finally right.

~*~*~*~*~

Glorfindel ever so slowly and reluctantly pulled out of his lover. Both sighed at the loss of that physical connection, yet they held each other close. They had wiped away the monumental mess they had made with the satin sheets and lay in each others arms, naked. Their limbs entwined, their bodies hummed and sang as one, they were forever and always as one. No words were needed, the silence between them was astounding in their aftermath. Hands stroked, and lips brushed against skin and hair.

Erestor smiled as Glorfindel began to hum a melody he knew well. He nuzzled into Glorfindel’s neck kissing the soft flesh and snuggled closer as Glorfindel sang to him gently, changing the words only slightly, as this time, it was he who sang for Erestor.

~*~

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousands winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there. I did not die.

~*~

The end.


Notes: Again, poem used was by Mary Frye from 1932 titled "Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep".