Shadow of Hate [formerly known as Witnesses]

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Prologue – Thorien: The Grey Wizard [The Dwarf and The Wizard]

It is the day I have finally went out for the sun. I have been inside the cottage where me and my mentor, Mr. Gandalf, have been studying more spells. Yes, I am a student of Mr. Gandalf himself, one of the nine men who went to save the Middle Earth from destruction. I was in utter shocked when he asked me to be his apprentice, seeing that I am really a warrior, not a wizard.

Gandalf went outside also, carrying some bagges. “Thorien, would you please bring Shadowfax here? I reckon that we should get going.”

“Where are we going, master? If you don’t mind me asking…” I said while I walked towards Shadowfax and brought her towards Gandalf.

Gandalf smiled. “It’s been seven years since we have defeated Sauron, and the Fellowhip of the Ring will gather on the Kingdom of Minas Tirith, in Gondor.”

I stand shocked. “In Minas Tirith? I’ll be on Minas Tirith?”

Gandalf laughed as he prepared Shadowfax, “I would believe that it is, Mr. Thorien.”
I starin ain awe at Gandalf, and then laughed and jumped, mixed emotions filling my heart. “Oh, master Gandalf! I’ve never been happy in all my life! Surely, I have met all of them, but to be on the City of Kings, to be with all of the Fellowships, I—I cannot explain how happy I am!”

As in cue, Shadowfax heed, as if he was feeling the same as I feel. Gaf laf laughed at the both of us. “Hush now, little one. Even Shadowfax cannot control his happiness!” he paused for a moment, and then spoken again, “But there is another reason why we would travel towards Minas Tirith, young one. You are to be honored as the Grey Wizard of Atorie* and Gondor.”

“I am…what?”

Shadowfax, and then my horse Naured, leaped out from joy.

He clasped his hands over my shouder, as if to stop me from shivering. “You deserve to be called the Grey Wizard, young one. Even at a young age, you have proven enough. Within five years of teaching you wizardy, I might say myself you are a fast learner.”

“With the help of the White Wizard, of course,” I said in matter-of-factly. I smiled ang hugged Gandalf. “I am too pleased to hear that news, Master Gandalf.”

“And I know your parents will be also pleased, knowing that after all, there’s a wizard running in the family.”

I nod as I went towards Naured and patted her, “I am glad that they have accepted that I am a wizard, not a soldier. I think I would be off to be a wizard. Sometimes I could be a little bit of a coward.”

“Whether you are in shields and swords or in clad and staff, you are great.”

“Ah, master. You talk to highly of me.”

“Young one, you are to be talked highly. I might say myself, you are the best student I have handled,” he replied as he rode Shadowfax.

“Thank you, master. Thank you for everything.”

We then rode off towards Minas Tirith, great happiness eveloped us both.

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Nights turned into days, and days turned into nights. As we draw nearer and nearer towards Gondor, my excitement was suddenly turning into nervousness. What if Gandalf is mistaken? What if I am not desrving to be the Grey Wizard? I am only on my post-twenties, a little too young to be a wizard. They might question me, as to what background I came from. What should I say? Should I say that my ancestors were great Generals and soldiers of Rohan and Atorie or shall I simulate them, let alone believe that I am a traveler, and that I asked Gandalf to teach me? What shall I do?

I sighed deeply. My mind is flooded with questions, but I do not have any answer at all. Best is to let it be until tomorrow.

I snapped out from my reverie as Gandalf the puts out the fire and laid on his bedroll. “Sleep well, nessa quen. Don’t be too nervous about it. Tomorrow is where we will reach the gates of Minas Tirith, and I do not want the people blaming me that I tire the *soon-to-be* Grey Wizard. Go to sleep then.”

I merely laughed at the last statement Gandalf had said, “Yes, master. I will take my sleep.” With that, Gandalf closed his eyes and started to sleep.

I sat under the tree, where my bedroll is placed. I put my hands on my nape, and then lay on the bark of the tree where I could see the stars. They are bright at this time of the night, indeed they are.

Maybe Gandalf was right; maybe I am destined to be the Grey Wizard.

I chuckled softly, just so as not to awaken my master. I think of it, *Thorien the Grey*. It’s little bit humorous, so to say, because I am going to be in less than a day.

And then a single star glow. And it reminds me of someone.

Legolas.

I should barely stop this nonsense in my head. I know for the fact that he does not love me, and that he belongs to someone else.

As my mind starts to ache because of my thoughts, I then decided to go in sweet slumber. Until then, let the gods of heaven and Elbereth protect us until we reach Minas Tirith.

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“This is it, Thorien. Minas Tirith, the Capital City of Gondor.”

I starred in amusement as I saw first gate. It was huge and made of steel. “I feel like I’m a dwarf,” I murmured silently to myself. Gandalf raised his staff and used his brightly light to signal that we have arrived. My stomach did a-tumbling while I gulped hard.

“Raise the gate!” a soldier called.

“Raise the gate,” another replied.

And soon enough, the gates were raised, and then there…I saw the Fellowship including Prince Faramir and his wife, Princess Eowyn, King Elrond, King Eomer. I felt so little as I stared at them.

“Welcome back, Gandalf!”

“It’s good to see you again, Gandalf!”

Everybody mobbed him like swarm of bees, as I steadied Naured. I felt the urge to talk to them one by one, shaking hands with them, and then push up a conversation. I felt my stomach again go a-tumbling, but then I stayed as composed as possible.

I smiled at everybody; they seemed to miss my master so much. Who wouldn’t have, I thought. My master has such a kind heart that people adores him. As everybody swarms my master, one of the men of the Fellowship approached me. He was ridding a white horse, his hair blond and braided on his sides, his dress in silver. My heart thumped in irregular beats, faster and faster as this man approached.

Legolas.

The man I have learned to love and not yet have learned to let him go.

He approached me with his loving smile that send thousands of fireworks flying over my head. I shook my head, bad thought…
“Good ‘morrow, Legolas,” I finally said.

“Good ‘morrow, Mr. Thorien,” he smiled at me as he went down from his horse. I also did the same, Naured was almost as happy to see Legolas than I am. He patted Naured and Naured responded eagerly, leaping higher. We both smiled at him for he adoregolegolas as much as I do. “I have missed you.”

I smiled at him. “He did miss you too.”

“I was talking to you, Mr. Thorien,” he smiled at me again, but now with tenderness. Naured leaped, as if to say he’s happy, that Legolas and I are together again. “I think he’s very happy to see you, Legolas.”

He chuckled a bit; his caresses were now on Naured’s flame-like hair. “It has been three years then, isn’t it?” He asked with his eyes transfixed still on Naured.

“I am glad I have seen you again, Legolas. Come, I think they are finished with welcoming Gandalf,” I rode Naured again, as he rode his horse, and then rode up to the castle.

Legolas and I have met three years ago, when him and Mr. Gimli visited us. They were again on travel, searching for another quest. When I first saw him I thought he was an elven woman with a bow and arrow, but then when he was introduced, I fell in utter shocked. They all laughed at me, Gimli almost stubling down because of happiness. I told him that I am sorry for having him mistaken as such, and he accepted whole-heartedly.

They have stayed for a year in Atorie, a long rest from their travels, or so we thought. Gandalf had convinced Gimli to stay, and after that, Legolas and I have discovered something about them. I usually chuckled whenever they would excuse themselves for *herbs* along the trails of Atorie. It would take them more or less five days, and they would go back at our cottage bring no herbs. They usually say that they have used it for some experiments, and after hearing it, Legolas and I would laugh.

It was evident that they are in love with each other. A dwarf and aard,ard, it might be awkward, but at least love surrounds them both.

Other things we would usually do is tending Naured together while we tell him stories about great horses. Shadowfax would be there also, listening to every story he has to say. He likes Naured, and Naured likes him very much.

Along those days that Legolas and I were alone, he would usually teach me elvish, and I taught him more of herbs and medicines. At night, we would cliimb on a top of a tree, and look at the stars. He usually sings elvish songs to me, which really soothes me, not only physically but spiritually. My soul’s like floating on air, and my body relaxes, releasing every tension. There was one time when he put his head on my shoulder, his voice seemed to be sad. I thought it was just a mere feeling, an attachment to his character, but I felt something greater…much greater.

And from that time on, I know that someone have captured my heart, unknowingly.

But then, when darkness has fallen and everybody’s in deep slumber, I heard Legolas’ cry. He was a few feet away from me, drenched in sweat. I shoot up and tried as much as possible to be on his side, and calm him. My feet caught up in a tangle with my bedsheet, and then I heard him again cry again, and I know it wasn’t mine, for he was in pure ecstasy when he called his name. It broke my heart; my tangled feet lay forgotten. I stared at him with blank eyes as I felt my soul slowly easing its way out of me. My love was sucked out in just one cry, and then I felt it…

I felt… *empty*

After that, I started to forget, tried to forget. But then I think it would be too imposible to say so. But I should stay focused. They left, him and Gimli, to take another journey. Gimli and Gandalf had a long goodbye, Gandalf still insisting Gimli to stay. But then Gimli was strong to his decision, and Gandalf had let go. Legolas kissed me on my cheeks, and he patted Naured goodbye. They rode off, still empty.

I then realize it is not good to grieve on this loss, for I know that I have a purpose to reach. I tried hard to be as good as Gandalf, and focused on my entire being on my goal. This, I guess, made my heart hide in the coners of my own, until it mend, then we shall see.


But then I am here again, staring at his face, looking so deeply at his blue eyes, wanting him just like in that tree, his head on my shoulders, singing me his elvish songs…

…I am falling again.

Elbereth, may you give me strength…’tis a moment of my grievance again.

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