Underneath it all

Chapter two, the forest lake

I had been watching the moon. I used to find it alluring and beautiful, but now it felt like a ticking clock. It would not be long until the moon was full once more, and I had to tell my father.
In return the healer had not mentioned the use of my leather vest. Which I had to tighten more and more, as my belly had grown with alarming haste. The healer said that nothing looked as if it was not normal, as normal as a male pregnancy could be, that is.

The more my belly grew, the harder it was for me to ignore this fact. I was going to give birth to a child. My mind tried desperately to tell me this was ridiculous, but as I has to rip my leggings in the waist, to even get them on. This just got more and more impossible to ignore.

I had spent many an evening and night at my balcony, watching the moon rise. Half asleep, half awake.
To tired to stay awake, but too scared to sleep. Nightmares had followed me since that damned day the healer had sealed my doom. Maybe that was why I had so much anger directed at him. Because he was the one to say it loud, he treated this thing inside me as a normal child. And all this made me feel like a female, knowing I was not - then what am I?

I leaned back against the wall and sighed. My mind drifted and suddenly remembered the faint scent of flowers, with this scent, came the memory of silvery softness.

/Haldir/

I smiled to myself, as I remembered those days I spend in the golden woods. I had arrived with a message to the lord Celeborn, only to find Haldir and his brothers. It did not take me long until I found out that Haldir was used to getting what he wanted. When he wanted it.

-*flashback*-
I had carried out my duties, delivered the letter to Lord Celeborn, and as I walked over to the stables to collect my horse, to begin my journey home. I saw a elf standing in the doorframe to the stabled, leaning casually up against the left side. "Leaving already?" he said. I had smiled and walked over to him "Haldir, it has been long"
the silver-haired elf nodded "Yes, indeed prince Legolas, too long" I laughed and padded the Galadrim's shoulder, while moving past him, but just in that second he slammed his hand against the other side of the doorframe cutting off my way ou wou would not leave without a decent meal - would you?" he smirked. I dropped my head and shook it, but decided to play along, and I looked up at him smiling "Why?, are you cooking?"

the galadrim smiled a crooked smile "would I invite you, if I were not?"

"Nay, that would be rude" I answered and leaned against the side of the door where Haldir had had his hand before. "When do we dine then?"

Haldir let out a loud laugh "we are going hunting first, I do not think the rabbit will lay upon my plate of its own free will, no matter how persuasive I am"

"Indeed" I chuckled "But I am afraid I would not bee of too much use on a rabbit hunt"

"Strange, I seem to hear you are one of the best archers in all of middle earth" he said an pointed at the bow I had over my shoulder.

I gave up, and just shrugged, and let Haldir lead me away from the stables and into the forest. We had walked for some time, when Haldir suddenly stopped me with a gesture. And pointed at the grass just under a bush. And there was a little brown rabbit. He then looked at me and nodded towards my bow- apparently he wanted me to shoot the little animal.
I quickly drew a arrow, and send it flying right into the rabbit. And then looked at Haldir again, he smiled a wide smile and padded my back, before retrieving our dinner.

"What now?" I said and raised a brow

"Now we need to collect herbs and make a fire" Haldir said and ripped out the arrow of the rabbit, before wiping it off in the grass and handing it to me again.

"Did you plan on eating out here?" I said while placing the arrow back amongst the others.

"Of course" he said, but then looked up at me swinging the dead rabbit in front of me, so the blood dripped in the grass right next to my boots "but perhaps such like yourself, of royal blood, are perhaps not used to dining without rich tables and fine wines" he said in a taunting voice

"I will make the fire" I just said and turned around and walked into the woods, trying to hide my fury.
That.. That arrogant guardian!
I quickly gathered some firewood, and walked back to the clearing where we had shot the rabbit, and begun to build a fire.

Once I had the fire going Haldir had still not returned. So I sat down and then had a look down of myself, I was filthy and dusty, from the long ride, and then spending my day in the forest. I remembered that we had walked past a little forest lake right next to where I had made this fire.

"What are you thinking of prince?" I heard Haldir's voice say behind my back.

I spun around and looked up, Haldir stood there with three rabbits and a handful of herbs. "Three?" I asked

"I will not have it be told, that I do not care for the guests of the golden wood properly" he said and squatted down "now, will you tell me where your mind was before?"

I smiled. Haldir was a beautiful elf, I had always thought so, but now in the light of the flames, he looked even more brilliant than by daylight. "The little lake" I said, and hated myself for feeling a blush creep up in my face

"What a fantastic idea" he chuckled "go freshen yourself, while I finish up these rabbits"

"fine" I said and quickly stood up, and almost fled out of the campsite. I was right about the little lake though, it was just where I had remembered it to be. At least he could not taunt me about that, I thought to myself.

I got rid of my clothes and walked out in the lake; this was balm for the soul. The water was cool, and the last rays of sun between the mallon trees was a magnificent sight, I unbraided my hair and let myself float in the water, forgetting time and place. Until I heard Haldir's voice "I finished the dinner, and was wondering where you were, I worried you got lost in the woods"

"I did not" I snapped and heard my own voice as if were I an offended little elfling.

"No you were not" Haldir said and raised a brow before he began to remove his boots

"What are you doing?" I said

"The same as you, my prince" he said and shrugged off his tunic

"Oh" I said with in a little voice and tried to get back to just floating, looking at the star filled sky above me, but for some reason my mind could not stop from wondering where Haldir was, and when I heard him come into the water, I tensed, trying to listen after every little splash he made, when he suddenly emerged from the water, right next to my shoulder I could have screamed.

"It is a beautiful night, don't you think so, prince Legolas?" he said and looked at me, with a twinkle in his eyes that I knew all to well. But then again, I had known this could happen ever since I followed him into these woods, and had I not wanted him to come into the water with me?, did I not want to be here?

Yes I did, I wanted him to touch me, and taste me.

I turned my head and looked back at Haldir "yes it is beautiful, just as everything else in Lothlorien"

The Galadrim smiled and leaned over to kiss me, but I quickly let myself sink into the water and with swift stokes swam some paces away, before standing up "if you can catch me, you can have me" I laughed and swam further out in the lake.

Where Haldir had come from, or why I had neardeard him, I will never know, but suddenly I felt strong arms wrapping around my waist, pulling me into the water.
When we emerged once more, he had a firm grip on my arms "I yield, I yield" I laughed and was swirled around to face Haldir. "good" he said in a husky voice and this time claimed my lips in a bruising kiss, and only retreated when I was panting for air, he then turned me around once more, holding my back tightly against his own chest. His one hand trailed down between my legs, and I felt his own erection twitch against my buttock, as he found me to be hard too.

I rested my head against his shoulder and surrendered to the sensation of Haldir. "do your best galadrim" I whispered, knowing it would irritate him, but I just could not let this arrogant little elf, beat me at my own game.
And the result did not wait long.
He slammed himself inside me, not even taking the time to prepare me or coax me into submission, for he knew he had it already.
I bit my lip to stifle that scream that would have spilled from my lips, I would never give him the satisfaction of knowing he hurt me. It felt like fire spreading through my abdomen, and I clenched my fists, still not willing to let him know.
But he must have seen it, for he bit my shoulder gently and began to stoke my member with slow but hard stokes.

At first I thought he must have been the worst lover I had ever encountered, if this was his game, but when he gently turned my hear to claim my lips, on the same time as he stoke me, and changed his position behind me a little, which meant that he hit the little spot inside me with every stoke, he had me moaning softly quickly, and when a deep groan came from him, I had to close my eyes, and just feeling Haldir all around me, all over me, he was everywhere.

To my frustration he stopped as I felt the first soft waves of my upcoming orgasm. To just let his hands run over me, letting his fingers travel into my mouth, to then use the wet fingers to manipulate my nipples. I arched my back to just feel more

"P-Please, don't s-stop"

I heard my own voice shake, and the Galadrim chuckled, before pinching my nipple. But then continued as he had done before, this time he did not stop as he felt me shudder as the first indication of a climax. And then my legs buckled and Haldir's arm was the only thing keeping me up. My world felt as flowing lava, and the feeling of Haldir everywhere touching me, tipped the scale and I soon climaxed, spending myself in the water.
Not even feeling Haldir emptying himself inside me, I totally forgot where I was. But slowly returned to the world around me as I felt Haldir gently turning me around and kissing my brow.
Out of pure reflex I wrapped my arms around his neck, and he carried me to the shore. I was still panting when he placed me down next to my clothing.

We walked back to the camp and lay down next to the fire and dried off, before eating the rabbits. Spending the night out in the golden forest, we reacquainted ourselves several times that night, and Haldir indeed changed my mind about him being a bad lover.

And we ventured back to Caras Galadon in a good mood, jesting and laughing.
And when we reached the stables we met Haldir's brothers snickering while handing me some rations for my journey home, and fetching my horse. Haldir walked with me out to the large gates, and there he made me promise I would never return to Lothlorien without seeking out his talan. And I promised to cook for him next.
With that I left the fair woods, and travelled home.
-*end of flashback*-

It seemed so far away, now when I sat on my balcony, with a swollen belly and dark rings under my eyes, this one most delightful night in Lothlorien, Haldir was one of the four. But I prayed the Valar I would not have to ruin our friendship with a message like this, of course there had been Lord Elronds chief advisor too. But that was a different situation. We had never been friends, and only lovers for one night.

/one night is enough/

I sighed and rested my hand on my belly. Perhaps it would be best to just run, not to tell my father or any other living soul, but then who would deliver the child? I would need a skilled healer for that.
I would have to tell my father.
What 'could' I tell him? I knew nothing myself, I didn't even know who was the father of this 'thing'. And I was not to tell him that I had my theories of who it could be, he would be more angered with knowing that, than just believing that I was a hore. I wished I had someone I could draw some courage upon.

Tomorrow eve I would have to tell my father, or to break my vow to the healer, and I was sure that it would be better that ada would hear it from my lips, than from the healer.

The sun was rising as I stood up. This day was going to be terrible, and over too fast, much too fast.
I went into the bathroom to freshen up, I avoided the mirror, as it would only remind me of my sorry state. Upon looking at the water in the bowl, the answer stuck me

/Galadriel/

She would take me in, help me and heal me. She would never shun me, I hoped. And I could surely use a friend such as Haldir. Even should events be so, that he did not sire the child. He would hopefully stand by me.

The soft knock on the door indicated that it was time for me to attend the morning meal. And as I tightened the leather west as much as I could, I felt like I could cry. Why did this happen to me, me of all living beings on the face of middle earth. When I found out whose fault it was, I would rip their eyes out, and throw this damned thing inside me in their lap.
I shook myself out of my desperation some, and made a effort for a straight face before I walked out the door, facing yet another day.


-tbc-

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- This is not betaed, live with it :P, all faults here is mine.
I want feedback - as always *smiles*


Az.