Lonely Hearts

Betaed by AP.Thanks !
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http://www.angelfire.com/al4/legolas_woods
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Glorfindel struggled to remain awake but his tired body didn't give up, it kept pulling him into a sleepy state. It had been fifteen minutes since Elrond disappeared into the other room to check on Erestor, had passed, but it felt longer for him.

He finally gave up and relaxed, letting go of everything while he traveled into the Elvin dreamscape.

The door opened and out came two raven haired elves, upon seeing Glorfindel sleeping one relieved sigh sounded throughout the room. Erestor couldn't believe his eyes as he saw Glorfindel sleeping, he felt like a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

Elrond smiled at his friend as he saw Erestor's gaze turn soft and the worry on his face disappear. He knew that Erestor didn't want to deal with the blonde elf right now and that Glorfindel's sleepy state must be the Valar's gift to him, for Erestor's fear was real and it was strong. He never knew that he would one day be the comfort to this cold (on - the "“ exterior) elf, but now he realized that the shell Erestor had built around himself for protection was breaking down, and all that was left, was a scared child afraid to seize the world.

Erestor went over to the bed to make sure the other elf was sleeping, not daring to touch him or even breathe. Why he was so scared, he didn't know. Glorfindel's presence always made him nervous but now it made him scared. He was scared of the rejection, he knew that, and although the comfort Elrond gave him made him a bit stronger, he still had big doubts.
Why was he such a coward, why didn't he just admit his feelings for Glorfindel to the whole world? *Why does it hurt to LOVE?*

He never got the silent answers to his questions, although deep down he knew what the solution was. He had to stop being an insecure elfling. He had to be a stronguregure and keep this bond from fading, because he loved enough for the both of them. Even if Glorfindel would never love him he had to admit his feelings to the other elf. There was no way out of it. The first thing he needed to do when Glorfindel woke up, was say those three little words to him, even if it meant that the sky would collapse the same second. He needed to do it. (Easier said, then done.) His reasonable thoughts tortured him but he knew his mind was already made up.

Elrond saw the play of emotions on Erestor's face and chuckled. He knew that Erestor was fighting a battle with his inner self and he knew from the expression on his face that Erestor had made a huge decision.
He wanted to ask what the other was thinking, but he stopped himself. He didn't want to disrupt the advisors musings so he took a seat in the nearby chair.


"Elrond, I am sorry to ask this, I don't want to be rude or anything, but.. Could you leave? I think I need a moment to myself before he awakens." Erestor whispered, as his gaze lingered on his husband.

"Sure my friend. You may have all the time you want. I am not offended and I am glad that you now have the strength to face your fears. I will be near if you need me."
Elrond whispered in reply as he came and squeezed the other's shoulders in a comforting grip.
"Between you and me, I think it is good idea that you decided to reveal your feelings. Do not fear, because you never know; he might actually return them..." With that Elrond turned and left the room, leaving a very shocked Erestor behind. *How does he know? I didn't tell him. Well, he never ceases to amaze *

He took a deep breath, and settled himself on the bed trying to get comfortable as his previous thoughts returned. He felt at ease although he knew he should feel panicked because soon he would admit everything to Glorfindel. He knew it was better to let it all go then to keep it all pent up inside where it could choke him.

He came closer to Glorfindel, raising his hand to bestow a gentle touch upon his husband's hair. The thought of this creature being his husband warmed him inside and it gave him the strength to fight this fear. Never had Erestor seen something so beautiful, and the sight of it made him tremble from desire to hold him, caress him, and make him his for eternity.

He knew when those beautiful eyes came to life, that there would be quons ons for him to answer. He was ready now and he prayed that his strength and patience would last till the end of his confession. Erestor moved his body closer to the other, and felt Glorfindel's breath on his hand. Erestor removed several of the blond strands from his husband's eyes and relaxed, letting the song of the birds lull him to sleep. They slept like that for a couple of hours. As Elrond came in to check on them, he smiled as he saw Erestor's arm wrapped aroulorflorfindel's middle.
He closed the door behind him and left them to get some rest.

The sound brought Glorfindel from his dreamscape and he felt warmth around his stomach area. He blinked a couple of times, trying to clear his sleepy eyes. As he turned to his left side, his face brushed some dark locks and he realized that it was not his hair, but Erestor's. He finally saw where and in what position he was lying down in and a small sound of the surprise escaped his lips. Erestor was holding his waist and they were snuggled up close together, so close that only the thin sheets separated their bodies. He tried to brush off a couple of locks from his lips, but he realized he couldn't move, one of his hands supported Erestor's head, and the other was tangled among the sheets.

He took a deep breath and inhalee ote other's scent. He tried to speak but instead decided to keep his mouth shut, he didn't want to disturb the other's rest. He knew that he had been a little harsh toward Erestor and he felt sorry for having upset him. He didn't know how to forgive Erestor's betrayal, even though his heart was telling him to.

Erestor felt somebody moving against him and instantly pulled himself from the Elvin dreamscape. First he felt disoriented, as his hair covered most of his vision but a second later he realized where he was and who was there with him. He pulled his hand from the other's waist while at the same time removing his dark locks from his eyes with his other hand. As he met his husband's gaze he started to fret. *Oh my Valar. He is awake*

"Glorfindel..." He said the name with a quaver in his voice, trying to calm himself. Glorfindel watched him with slight amusement and Erestor wondered how long had the other been awake.

"Erestor.." Glorfindel replied, his eyes locked with Erestor's. The silence around them was deafening and neither of them knew what to say to the other. Erestor felt embarrassed and averted his eyes.

"Erestor, what are you doing here? Especially lying so close to me? I know that I went to sleep alone and when I woke up, we were tangled like this."
Glorfindel demanded the answer of his husband, but realizing his anger laden voice immediately changed tonetone to eliminate the fear in Erestor's eyes.

"I don't know." Erestor lied. "I just fell asleep on my side of the bed and the next thing I knew we were entwined." He sighed as he lowered his head to the pillow, collecting the strength to go on with this conversation.

"I see, well, I am glad you came back. I've wanted to talk to you about that kiss earlier today and now that you are calm, I think we should. Erestor, what is going on with you? You kissed me today and I need to know why. Just because we are married doesn't mean we have to be intimate, and I swear if I find the way out of this bond I will gladly take it."

"There is no way out of it, unless you want to die and I will not allow that and nothing you say can change my mind. I also wanted to talk about that kiss, and I think there is something that I have to tell you. Something I have kept hidden for a long time."

"What is it. What do you have to tell me?" Glorfindel inquired, arching his eyebrow in confusion, he had a feeling that something big was about to be confessed.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Huor, I am here." The soft voice brought Huor from his reverie and he looked up to see  Semar's face above him. He tried to move his body a little but the wound on his stomach made it difficult.

"Oh, all right. Sit down. I need to speak to you."

"What about?" Asked the same voice and Huor detected fear coming from the other elf.

"It is about you spying on me. Semar, I saw you at the door an hour ago. What were you doing sneaking around, when you made it so clear that you cannot stand to be near me?"

"I wasn't sneaking. Why would I? You mean nothing to me. I just came back get back my knife, I forgot it. I left it on the bedside table." Semar pointed to the left side where his knife lay beside a couple of medicine jars.

"Oh, I see. Well, I saw your expression when you were there at the door and it seemed to me that you were jealous of the attention I gave to Calaglin. Were you, my pet?" Huor grinned wickedly, while Semar blushed profusely.

"What,? Me? Jealous? Of who? Are you mad?! I would have to feel something for you to be jealous. The only thing I feel for you is hate and loathing, and don't you dare to call me pet. I am not one of your cheap sex toys that you can discard after one night. Gods, you disgust me."

"Oh, aren't we in denial. Semar, I have you all figured out, and you can deny it all you want, but I can see it in your eyes. You want me, don't you?" Huor chucked as Semar's face became colored with fury and he knew that the other elf was about to burst into pieces. *Ai, this will be interesting.*

'What ? You...you... I actually don't know what to call you anymore, but a PIG. How dare you try to identify my feelings. I don't want you, get that through your thick skull. I would rather ride an orc into oblivion than ever lay with you!" Semar shouted, making the occupants in the adjoining room shudder. His voice was filled with anger and Huor almost regrettrovorovoking the other elf, realizing he was wounded and couldn't defend himself if Semar attacked him.

"Calm yourself. You are bringing more attention to this room then you should. Why do you always get worked up over something that you know is the truth? Why don't you admit to yourself that you are attracted to me?" Huor said in soft voice as he shifted his predatory gaze all over Semar's body.

"Never, because you speak a lie and you make believe that something is there when it isn't. Maybe you should rest yourself a bit more because obviously that fever damaged your brain cells." Semar said with cold as he felt that the other elf checking him out. "And keep your eyes on the wall if you know what's good for you."

"You cannot tell me what to do with my eyes, especially if I see something I like, and now, that thing is you
\
"Oh, gods. You never give up. If that is all you wanted to talk about, I think I just might stop wasting my time and leave. I cannot stand being here with you anymore." Semar groaned as the realized that this fight was lost to the other elf and that there wasn't anything left he could do to make this his game. He just wanted to leave Huor and to retreat into his shell where he would be safe from all of this, especially these unknown feelings that were ripping him apart.


"Leave!? You are not going anywhere until you tell me what you feel for me. I know what I saw on your face whenas has here with Calaglin. It was pain and jealousy. Call me crazy, but I know what I saw on your face."

"Damn you. You just can't give up. You always have to make me miserable. Fine, I will tell you. Yes, it was jealousy and yes it was hurt, but by the Valar I swear I will never show it again. You are not worthy of my so-called feelings, and it will stay that way forever. Leave me be. Now, if you will excuse me I have to go to my post. I will call Calaglin for you, so he can check up on your perverted head."

"It is just like you Semar, to run away. You are a coward who cannot face something as simple as the truth." Huor chuckled again but he knew he had gone too far.

"Don't you call me coward, you filthy piece of orc shit. Valar, how I have the urge to strangle you right now, but I wouldn't want to get my hands dirty touching something as filthy as you!" Semar took the pillow that was on the floor and threw it at Huor's body, hitting Huor's head in the process. Semar then stormed from the room not even saying good-bye to the elf he had left behind.

"Ah! Valar, he is childish. But he is the only one I want right now." Huor murmured and turned his head to the door where Calaglin stood laughing so hard he gripped his stomach. He wanted to laugh too, but he really didn't find it funny. Huor just smiled a little as he remembered what Semar had just admitted to him. *Yes, I thought so. He does feel soing ing for me!* He cursed himself for being so stupid as to chase Semar away. He didn't mean to embarrass the young one with his words, but his tongue went running on before he could stop it. He knew he needed to talk to the other elf more seriously next time, so he decided to do so when he got better. He decided to stay away from bedroom adventures for a while, at least until he figures out what it was about the guard that made him giddy inside. He had to behave himself ifwantwanted to get through to the other elf. But how?

~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Erestor you've been stalling here for about ten minutes. Now tell me: What is this big secret?" Glorfindel shook his head, on the edge of his patience, as he gazed at the advisor.

"It is so hard to tell you this, but,"

"No buts. Tell me now!" Glorfindel yelled, his voice becoming softer as Erestor jumped a little from the bed.

"Fine I will. You know that I consider you my friend and tacit within is that the only feelings I should feel for you are respect and admiration, but that is not all that I feel for you. For millennia, since the fist time I saw you, I felt something deep for you, something that only lovers feel for each other. You see, I love you." Erestor confessed, seeing Glorfindel's' gaze change into shock his lips parted in disbelief."

"Huh?" Glorfindel couldn't believe his ears. He never thought that this was what Erestor kept from him, it shocked him.

"Yes, that is the thing I wanted to tell you. Speak to me! Are you angry?"

"No, I am not, just shocked. Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"I am not sure why. I was so scared that you would reject me or even hate me. But now I don't care and I don't want to keep this to myself anymore."

"I would never hate you for that. I wouldn't reject you either. I just cannot understand why you thought so low of me?"

"It doesn't matter now. I knew that from the start that this love was foolish. About our future, well, first I think that we should stay bonded. When you get well, I will move into a separate room and you will have your privacy. Although I will be close at all times, you can have your bedmates and I won't interfere. We will keep this bond a secret." Erestor blurted out these sentences, feeling he might faint as the air around him suddenly became stuffy.

"Wait a minute. You just admitted your love to me and now yay iay it is foolish? What makes you think that you can plan our future alone? I've read in the library about bonds that made during the exchanged of life force. It says that the bonded cannot have any partners other than their husband or wife. It also says that in order for this bond to last said bonded have to mate and confess their mutual love for one another."

"Oh, Valar! I must have missed that!"

"Yes, you did. And are you aware that the bond-mate who gave his life force will become the maternal elf? The elf who bears children?"

"Children, WHAT? Are you sure it said that?" Erestor felt small goose bumps rising on hack.ack.

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TBC"¦

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Beta notes: sorry to all reading this, and the author it has been a hectic week and betaing was just no in the schedule"¦