In the Garden

Title: In the Garden, Chapter 14
Author: Sorsha
Fandom/Pairing: Elrond/OFC, others implied
Rating: R
Warning: AU (Story set several hundred years after ROTK in Aman); Het.
Feedback: Constructive feedback appreciated.
Archive: Adult Fanfiction; Fanfiction
Acknowledgements: Thanks to Lady Victoria for betaing this fic.
Disclaimer: Anything you recognize belongs to Prof. Tolkien. A quick check of my bank account should prove I’m not making anything off of writing my stories. Sigh!
Summary: Life in the Blessed Land has not been so blessed for Elrond. Can the happiness that has long eluded him be found in the words of a red-bound journal, the help of his scheming friends, and the granting of a wish that none thought possible?

Chapter 14 --- Lake Lorellin*

The rising moon lent a silvery glow to the lake, making its still surface as smooth and clear as a mirror. Sensing the approach of another, Elrond glanced over his shoulder… and found himself staring into eyes that could have been his own. “Welcome home, penneth. I have waited many long years for you to arrive.” (young one)

“I… know you.”

An amused smile touched the face of the other. “We have never met in the manner we are now… but yes, you know me.”

Sensing the magic that emanated from this lovely being, he knew instinctively she was not one of the eldar. “You are… a Maia.” His eyes widened as comprehension came to him. “You are my great-great grandmother… Melian.”

“Indeed I am, Elrond Eärendilion.” Tilting her head to one side as she studied him, ‘The Maia’* observed, “The last centuries have taken a toll on you, ion nin. I see the lines of grief and worry have only deepened since last I saw you.” (my son)

Startled by this comment, he asked, “You have seen me before today? In visions…?”

“In visions, yes, but I have seen you in person on many occasions, though you did not know who I was. Over the millennia, I made many trips to Middle-earth to be near you… to help you when I could.” Watching the emotions play across his face, Melian continued. “I guided Cirdan and your foster father to the cave where you and your twin had been left by Maglor. He brought you there at my bidding in atonement for his crimes and because he had grown fond of you both.”

Smiling, she added, “I often disguised myself and sought refuge in Imladris. You never failed to give me the protection of your valley and the welcome of your hall, regardless of the circumstances I offered upon my arrival.”

Staggered by this news, Elrond sank to the ground staring up in shock at the beautiful being that was his distant grandmother. A memory, one he had not had in millennia, came to him. “I saw you… that day in the cave. Elros told me I had imagined it, but… I saw you.”

“Aye, I suspected you had, for you looked directly into my eyes. Over the centuries, Olórin often reminded me that the magic of the Maiar runs strong and true in you. Your younger son inherited that trait, while Elladan is very like my Elwë, a born leader,” she mused. “You remind me much of my daughter, both in your gifts and in your looks.”

Surprised once again, he asked, “You think I look like Lúthien? Celeborn has always said my children are very like her in appearance… especially my Arwen. He has never suggested I favored her.”

Kneeling to sit beside him, she observed, “You have my eyes… they betray the magic of your spirit. Otherwise, you remind me of so many. I see my beloved husband in the stubborn set of your brow and chin. You have your mother’s lips, her smile… or frown. Your tall, lean form and the red tones to your black hair are from your father… but, chiefly, I see my daughter.”

Seeing the uncertain look on his face, she asked, “Has no one ever told you how beautiful you are?”

A bright blush spread over his face as Elrond ducked his head to avoid her probing look. “Nay, for I am not.”

Melian reached over to clasp his hands. “I am very much afraid I must argue that point, penneth. You bear the look of those most dear to my heart. How can I not think you beautiful? How can those that love you not see what I see, for your heart and spirit are a wondrous sight?” (young one)

Moved beyond words by the love that surrounded him, Elrond cautiously raised his eyes to meet hers. “I am not an elf, though I chose to be counted among the Firstborn. I am half-elven and I have not the splendor of the Eldar. My face is aged and I… have too many of the traits of the Edain.”

“And why would any of that diminish your beauty? It is exactly because you carry the blood of both the Eldar and the Edain… my Maiar blood, that you are special among all those that walk Arda.” Squeezing his hands, she declared, “You are more than beautiful. You are wise and caring… kind and loving. You possess greater passion that you yet know.”

Reaching over to brush a soft kiss to his forehead, she added, “I am a Maia of Estë and Vána. You carry the healing and nurturing magic of this place in your very being.”

The fears and doubts of his long life rose in his heart, and Elrond struggled to breath. “I am only…”

“You are only Elrond Peredhel, the son of Elwing and Eärendil! You are a wise and just leader, a kind and caring friend, a brave and resourceful warrior, the greatest healer and master of lore of Middle-earth… a proud and loving father. You are the beloved child of Eru Ilúvatar! There is no ‘only’ in any of that!” she exclaimed.

“But… for so long…”

“You give others too much power to hurt you, penneth. Those that have less in their natures will always envy and deride those so blessed as you. Let go of the hurts that weight at your spirit and breath free!” Pulling him into a comforting embrace, she whispered, “Long have I wanted to do this. I saw your grief… your burdens, but I was bound to remain unknown to you.” (young one)

Sagging in relief at the long-needed, long-denied comfort, he clung to her. “Naneth’ra!” (Grandmother)

“Indeed, pen vuil. We have waited for many long years for you to come home!” Tightening her hold on the quaking elf in her arms, she soothed, “Your mother has long despaired you would find your way to these healing waters before grief took you. We rejoice to see you here at last.” (dear one)

Tears streaming down his cheeks, Elrond looked up into the Maia’s eyes. “My mother? She did not want me to visit her. She does not want me! She left me…”

A second pair of arms wrapped themselves around his waist, as a warm body came to rest at his back. “Never that, ion nin! It broke my heart to leave your and your twin… as it broke the day I asked you to wait before coming to see me. If I had met you on your arrival or invited you to visit me, my presence would have become a bandage over the wounds that fester in your heart and they would never have healed. You need the healing of this place. I was forced to leave you to grieve until you found your way here.” (my son)

Whipping around, Elrond found tear-filled blue-grey eyes… blue-grey eyes he had not seen since he had been a tiny elfling. “Naneth?” (mother)

“Welcome home, my beloved child! I have lived for this moment since that horrible day so long ago! Your Ada watched with despair, your heartbreak when Elros chose the path of the mortal. He saw and told me of the many pains and losses you have endured. You were never alone, beloved one, for you were ever in my heart!” Elwing sobbed. “I have missed you so! We love you, Elrond! Never doubt that!”

“You love me… Ada watched?”

“Always, my son, I have always loved you, as has your Adar. From the first night his ship sailed the night sky, he watched over you. He knew you looked up to see him… sought his comfort. It grieved him he could do no more than shine his light to guide your way,” she whispered, her tears making her voice rough and thick.

“Can… can I see him again?”

Smiling, Elwing caressed his cheek, desperate to comfort her son. “Soon, penneth. When you have healed, we can travel to my tower. Each morning, my husband comes home to me, but cannot leave the tower for he is no longer a being of Arda, but of all Eä. When the night approaches, he boards his ship and sails the night sky bringing his comfort. I fly with him, while his ship is low in the sky. He still watches and told me you were on your way to Lorien, so I flew here to be with you as you heal.” (young one)

“But, I did not come here for healing. I came…”

Interrupting, Melian soothed, “While the needs of others brought you here, your spirit sought the peace of this place. Your fëa knew even if your heart has not yet formed the knowledge. It is time.” (spirit)

Wrapping her arms around her two descendants, she joyfully proclaimed, “By the grace of Valar, Lady Estë and Lord Irmo will grant you the healing and rest you sorely need.”

-----

It was late in the morning when Elrond slowly walked into the glade where his sons and friends waited. They had spent the night in talans hidden among the branches of the massive trees that surrounded them. He knew both Celebrian and Haldir had been taken to a pavilion on the opposite side of the lake by attendants of Estë. The Vala had bid them rest while she saw to their immediate care, but he knew his sons and friends were worried about them… and, likely, about him, as well.

“Ada! Where have you been? We could not find you when we looked… thought Mithrandir was certain you were safe,” Elrohir demanded, looking back and forth between the two dark-haired ladies at his father’s side.

Pulling his son into a quick hug, Elrond offered, “I am indeed sorry if I worried you, my son. I am well and am feeling better than… perhaps, better than I have since I was a small child.”

Before he could continue, Lindir spoke. “Lady Elwing? It is you! Thanks be to the Valar to see you again!”

Laughing, Elwing grabbed the minstrel’s hands. “Lindir! Tis good to see you, my friend! I owe you a debt beyond my ability to ever repay. You looked after my sons in my absence and have been as true a friend as I could ever have hoped for my family to have. Thank you, for I do not know how Elrond would have survived without you and your family!”

“Elwing? You are Elwing?” questioned Elladan, a dazed look overtaking his face as he looked back to his father for clarification. “I thought…”

“My sons, it is my pleasure to finally introduce you to your grandmother. Tis a long story that I will tell you later. Be content for now knowing the ending is happy!” Inclining his head toward his distant grandmother, he proudly offered, “And this is your many times over great grandmother, Melian.”

“Ai! Elrond, they look so much like you and your brother!” Elwing cried, clutching her son’s arm as her millennia old desire to meet them was realized.

Elrond nodded, hugging his mother to his side. “I have always thought they favored their uncle more.”

“Have you never looked in a mirror, ion? You and Elros were identical, so they look just as much like you!” she scolded. “Long have I waited for this day, pynneth. I heard of you from your Adar’ra observations and from Naneth’ra Melian’s visits, but it is never the same as finally meeting the ones that call to your heart.” (son) (young ones)

Snapping out of his daze, Elladan stepped forward and opened his arms, hoping for an embrace… needing the confirmation his grandmother was truly with them. Relieved beyond measure when she swiftly accepted his overture, he confessed, “We too have looked forward to this day, Naneth’ra!”

Approaching the pair, Elrohir wrapped them both in a tight hug. “We never thought to find you here in Lorien! We thought you lived on the coast… in a white tower. This is a great blessing to find you both!” With that, he reached out to capture the hand of his Maia foremother. Without hesitation, Melian joined the embrace.

“Aunt?”

So wrapped up were they in their reunion, they had failed to notice the approach of another elf. “Mae govannen, Celeborn. I am glad we have finally come to this day. Be at peace, for your daughter is in good hands and will be healed, if she allows it,” the Maia greeted, breaking away from her distant grandsons to accept the Sindar’s embrace. “Your uncle will be happy to see you again.” (Well met)

“My Adar told me you and our uncle lived near the Gardens. Is he not with you?” the tall Sindar asked.

“I left him in our garden as night fell yesterday, but I will be greatly surprised if he does not emerge from the woods in search of his long-lost kin sometime before Anor sets this day,” she offered, an affectionate smile lighting her features. “Dear Galadriel… tis good to see you, pen vuil. Take heart! We will see Celebrian and the brother of our young friends healed.” (dear one)

“My lady, tis a blessing to find you here! I can only imagine the joy that Elrond is feeling to find you both returned to his life… his sons’ lives,” she replied, accepting the embrace that was offered. “My daughter…”

“She still sleeps, but she has calmed. Soon, you will all be able to help her begin to rebuild her life, but for now, my lady bids me urge each of you to seek you own healing. Your struggles… the losses you suffered in Middle-earth, weight heavy upon your spirits.” Spreading her arms in welcome, the Maia announced, “Here shall you find the peace and healing you need. When you are ready, the waters will call to you.”

Hearing a pleased laugh behind her she turned to find the source. Seeing the grinning Maia standing next to the younger elves, Melian gave a cry of pleasure before pulling him into a tight hug. “Olórin, my old friend! I despaired we would ever see this day! I am thankful beyond words that you have helped guide them here, so that they will finally be healed. Your help to them all those years is deeply appreciated.”

“What began as a promise to you, my dear lady, long ago became my privilege. This family of elves… their friends, made me welcome and I grew to love them as my own.” Meeting Elrond’s gaze, he winked. “I too have prayed for this day.”

Laughing, Elrond shook his head and threw his arms around his sons needing the reassurance of feeling them close. “I would fear I am but dreaming, but I have never had such a dream as this. I finally begin to believe there is a home for us… me in these lands.”

“Never doubt that, ion. You are dear to us all and we could not bear to have you any other place than in our midst,” his mother soothed, responding to the slightly dazed look in her son’s eyes. Moving back to the three peredhil, she wrapped Elrond in a comforting embrace, sighing as her grandsons encircled the pair in their strong arms. (son)

-----

It was some time before Elwing stepped away from the embraces of her son and grandsons to approach the golden-haired warrior that had long had stood guard over those dear to her. “You must be Lord Glorfindel. As with my friend Lindir, I am in eternal debt to you, my lord! By your courage and sacrifice at Gondolin, you saved the lives of my husband and his parents. My sons… my family exist because of this.” Grasping his hands, she continued. “Your protection and friendship to Elrond and his family in your second life, humbles me. Thank you.”

“It has been millennia since I thought of my service to your son as anything other than my privilege and joy. They are my family as truly as my wife and sons,” he replied, his pleasure in his friend’s happiness evident in his eyes.

Sliding her arm through his, she guided him over to stand in front of the three awe-struck siblings. Smiling, she began, “I believe you will soon be my granddaughter. You will be a most welcome addition to our family for Elrohir’s happiness will be thus assured.”

Trading an amused look with Glorfindel at the shy, uncertain looks she was receiving, Elwing added, “Have faith, pynneth. Haldir will yet rally. He has already begun to accept responsibility for his actions and that is the first step he must take to find healing.” (young ones)

Before they could reply, a hardy voice boomed across the glade. “I do hope you have taken them to task for how long they have kept us waiting for this day!”

All eyes turned to stare at the elf leaning against a tree near the path to the lake. Stunned by the elf’s imposing height and mane of brilliant silver hair, it took them a moment before they focused on the dancing sky-blue eyes lighting his face. Warm smiles lit Celeborn and Galadriel’s faces as they recognized the new arrival.

“Behave yourself, my love, or you will frighten them off!” Melian scolded, a smile quirking her lips.

Walking over to wrap an arm over her shoulders, he teased, “Nonsense! If the orcs of Sauron… and Olórin’s newfound love of pipeweed have not caused them to run, I doubt a simple old elf like me will have that effect!”

“Simple… you are Elu Thingol!” Elrond exclaimed. “Adar’ra!”

Laughing, the former King of Doriath clasped his distant grandson in a tight embrace. “Indeed, ion. You and your house have been a credit to all that came before you. Welcome home!” (son)

-----

The day eased into evening, the excitement of the earlier hours had slowly waned as the weight of millennia of toil and grief pulled at their spirits. The elves ate, without enthusiasm, the meal they were given by the attendants of the Gardens. The peace and quiet of the night slowly settled around them, as exhaustion took its toll.

Looking to the west, the two Maiar rose to their feet. A bright shining light seemed to coalesce in the woods beyond their sight. They moved to stand to one side, kneeling silently as the light grew yet brighter.

Blinded for a moment by the radiance, the elves were slow to see the two glowing beings that had moved into their midst. Gasping in wonder, they fell to their knees as the earthy forms of the Valar became distinct. In a voice that whispered to the deepest corners of their hearts… their dreams, the Vala Irmo spoke. “Be at peace, children of Eru Ilúvatar. My wife and I have seen the pains of your heart… your spirits and will offer you respite and healing.”

Slowly, making eye-contact with each of those present, he studied each elf in turn before he continued. “Celebrian and Haldir still sleep. I have filled their dreams with memories of what they have done… the wrongs that weight at their spirits, so that they might understand their transgressions and the path they must follow to find healing… for themselves, as well as, those they injured. They will be given the insight to understand how their actions harmed others… feel the pain they thoughtlessly inflicted on those around them. Once they have achieved the necessary understanding, each of you will be given the opportunity to confront them… and, if you choose, assist them in finding their way back to us.”

“The road before them is long and difficult. Only they can decide if they wish to follow it.” Smiling gently at Himiel and her brothers, Estë offered, “Haldir gives us great hope, for he has already begun to focus on the task before him. He has begun to accept what we are showing him, knowing it is the only way he can help those that he harmed find peace. His guilt lies heavy on his heart. Accepting responsibility is the first step.”

Turning her head to address Galadriel and Celeborn, she continued. “Celebrian has yet to allow her spirit to acknowledge the wrongs she has committed. She struggles against accepting responsibility for what she has done to harm so many… her family and friends most egregiously of all. Until she does, her spirit will continue to fade. Have hope; she has much yet to see and to understand. We will not loose her… unless that is her final choice. I think she yet wants to live, so we have hope.”

“Once a wrong has been done… a hurt inflicted, it cannot be undone. Healing comes not in rewriting history to change what should never have been, but in learning to leave the grief and pain behind so that it no longer has the power to control your spirit. In the coming days, we will help each of you find a way to move away from your past… the strength to move forward with hope to meet your future, so that the peace your hearts crave will find you at last. Your fëar bleed, but together we will heal your wounds,” Estë promised, her voice a gentle caress.

“Those of your closest family and kin have been summoned here to join you, for the healing of one will aid in the healing of others. The burdens of Middle-earth weigh at your peoples and you, their leaders, must find peace before the others will likewise follow.” Looking at Elrond, Irmo added, “The school you seek to open will be a vital step in this, for many of your kin feel their presence in the Blessed Lands is unwanted by those that have always called it home. Sadly, there are those that do indeed feel thus. This must end.”

“Sleep well this night, pynneth,” Estë urged. “My husband will fill your eyes with dreams of your fondest memories. They will strengthen you for the days that come. In the nights that will follow, your dreams will be difficult, for they will revisit the deepest pains of your heart. He must do this to help you find new insight, so that you may understand the full truth of these memories.” (young ones)

Seeing the anxiety her words had caused, Estë soothed, “Do not worry, for you will not face any of this alone. We will be here and keep you safe, but you must have this insight if you are to release the anger and pain these memories bring to you. They hobble your spirits and keep you from moving forward in your lives.”

“Those we have summoned will arrive by the end of the day tomorrow. Have faith and a new beginning will soon be upon each of you.”

-----

*A/N --- Lake Lorellin lies in the Gardens of Lorien. The Vala Estë sleeps on an island in its center each day. The waters of the lake are the source of the healing waters of Lorien.

*A/N --- Melian was a Maia of Estë and Vána, who frequently traveled to Middle-earth in its early years. During the First Age, she met the Elven King Elu Thingol (Elwë) and they fell in love. Together they founded the Sindarin Kingdom of Doriath, which she kept secret by using her magic to create the Girdle of Melian. Their only child was Lúthien, reputed to be the most beautiful of all of the Children of Ilúvatar. She, in turn, fell in love with Beren, a prince of the first house of the Edain, a mortal. (If you haven’t read their story, stop reading this and go read the master!)

Long story short, after the death of her husband, Melian (who was often referred to as the Maia) is thought to have left Middle-earth. Her grandson Dior ruled Doriath for a time, but was killed when Doriath was sacked. The remaining elves of the Kingdom fled, most going to the Havens of Sirion. There Dior’s daughter and only known surviving child (another long story!), Elwing, met another peredhel, one named Eärendil.

Thus, Elrond and his twin were the descendants of the royal elven lines of the Noldor, the Sindar, and the Vanyar, the nobility of the three original houses of the Edain, and of the Maia, Melian… quite a pedigree! Elrond Half-elven was, in actual point of fact, nine-sixteenths elven, six-sixteenths Edain, and one-sixteenth Maiar. And, while he is often referred to as a Noldor, he actually had more Sindarin blood, though he and his sons were indeed the last of the Noldorian High Prices left in Middle-earth by the time of the WR.

[Source: Prof. Tolkien’s books, The Complete Guide to Middle-earth by Robert Foster, and the Encyclopedia of Arda (http://www.glyphweb.com/arda/default.asp).]


Thanks MarzBar! I'm sorry the last chapter made you cry. I bet this one did too! More soon!

Hi Zehla! Thanks for reading. I think this trip to the Garden will be good for everybody... even looney Celebrian!