A Lonely Love
folder
-Multi-Age › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
19
Views:
12,386
Reviews:
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Category:
-Multi-Age › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
19
Views:
12,386
Reviews:
103
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 14
Chapter 14
The following day found Erestor unchanged. Elrond was pacing back and forth in his study. He did not want to give up on Erestor, though he knew he had to send him to the Havens as quickly as possible. Making plans in his mind as to whom would accompany Erestor on his journey, he heard a knock at the sturdy wooden door. Sighing heavily at the intrusion into his thoughts, he called out in an annoyed voice. "Enter!"
The door opened to reveal a weary looking Carandhol. Elrond practically growled at him. "What is it that you want, captain?"
"M-my Lord Elrond," he bowed, "I wish to speak of Erestor”.
"Ha! Now suddenly you have a voice for his concern." Elrond sneered, no longer holding back his disdain for this elf's actions and inactions.
"Please, my lord, hear me out, I -I owe this much to Erestor, to you, and to Imladris." Carandhol pleaded into Elrond's eyes.
Elrond looked deeply into the red-haired captain’s eyes and saw only sincerity. "Very well, speak, whilst I can stand you in front of me."
"W-will Erestor fade?" Carandhol whispered to Elrond's straining ears.
"He is fading as we speak." Elrond's eyes glistened with anger and unshed tears.
Carandhol visibly gulped and his hands were shaking. "Of all that I dislike in Erestor, I do not wish this for him. He has done nothing to deserve such an end." Elrond let him speak without interrupting him.
"When I first saw him, I thought he an ellith," Carandhol slightly laughed. "He was as always lean, and his hair so long, in addition to wearing robes," he shook his head in remembrance, "even his fair countenance spoke of maideness. Though I was used to lying with warriors, he was beautiful and peaked my interest."
Elrond could not believe what he was hearing, Erestor lay fading, and he speaks of their coupling.
Carandhol sighed heavily and continued, "I soon grew bored, and we had nothing in common… I began to take lovers...he, he never told me to stop… so I took it as a silent acceptance.”
"Erestor was just barely past majority, he knew not warrior ways!" Elrond replied through clenched teeth. "Did you ever talk to him about your needs?"
"NO! No I did not!" Carandhol raised his voice faintly. “I have wanted out of this marriage since the very first year we were wed!"
"Then why did you agree to this?" Elrond tried to understand it all.
"I did it for my King, I did it for Gil-Galad. I am a warrior, I was his warrior, and would do anything he so asked of me--I pledged my sword to him in allegiance." Carandhol looked down, adding, "It was my duty."
"After Eregion fell and we followed you to Imladris, I have ever pledged my sword to you, my Lord Elrond." Carandhol could not meet Elrond’s gaze.
"I-I am nothing but a warrior, that is all I know, and now, my brothers-in arms shun me." Carandhol said defeated.
"Carandhol, you have always served Imladris well, that I cannot deny," Elrond softened his voice. "Though the abuse you put my chief advisor and friend through was lecherous indeed!"
"May, may I see him?" Carandhol asked Elrond weakly.
"Why?"
"So, so I may ask his forgiveness."
"And then what?"
“And then I will say good…bye.” Here the captain’s voice hitched in his speech.
Elrond nodded his answer, “Follow me, but be wary, Glorfindel is with him.”
“Glorfindel?” Carandhol asked and inwardly shuddered. “Why?” Elrond did not answer him.
Elrond told Carandhol to wait outside the room while he went in to check on Erestor. Glorfindel looked up upon seeing his lord enter. He was immediately on his feet whence he saw the look in Elrond’s eyes and the deep crease in his brow. “What is it, my lord?” he asked.
“Glorfindel, you will heed what I say.” Elrond told his seneschal with all the authority he could muster at that moment.
Glorfindel nodded once in reply, wondering what was about to take place.
“Carandhol is outside and wishes to see Erestor, and you will do nothing to stop him.” Elrond held up his hand to silence Glorfindel before he could say anything. “You will go to the far corner of the room and stay there, understood?” Here, Elrond raised an eyebrow in query.
Glorfindel was fuming! What could Cara possibly want with Erestor? He walked to the far corner and watched. He would not go against Elrond’s orders. All his instincts were honed and ready to strike at a moments notice.
Elrond walked to the door and gestured for Carandhol to bid entrance. Slowly, the red-haired captain did so, and found he could not look upon Erestor. Elrond gestured for him to continue on to the bedside.
Elrond then went to stand next to Glorfindel. They would not leave Erestor alone, not after what Elrond had overheard the last time Carandhol was alone with Erestor.
Carandhol forced himself to look upon the fading elf before him. They were together for millennia. He did not wish Erestor to fade. He deserved no such fate. He just knew that they were not meant to be. Erestor’s eyes closed in this unnatural sleep bothered the captain the most, for in all those years together he had never seen Erestor close his eyes in sleep…not once.
Sighing and gathering all the strength he could muster together, Cara walked to Erestor’s side. He gazed upon that face he knew as well as his own. “Why did you never fight back?” He whispered for Erestor’s ears only. Erestor’s head moved at the sound of his husband’s voice.
Glorfindel moved to go to his beloved’s side upon seeing that reaction from Erestor. Elrond moved his arm across the warrior’s chest to restrain him. “Stop, ‘Fin,” he commanded, “he has caused no harm to Erestor,” sighed Elrond, “at least he has responded, this is a good sign, he has not given up his struggle.” Glorfindel relaxed once more under Elrond’s touch, though he wished only to protect Erestor from the one beside him.
“Never once did you fight by my side, not in Eregion, not during the Last Alliance.” Carandhol sighed. “I never understood you… how one could be so passive all the time… perhaps, that in itself, is a strength all it’s own.” Here he paused, “ however, that is not my way, Erestor, and I found that I cannot respect that in you.” Here Carandhol shook his head and winced form the pain it caused his face. “Your gentleness does not appeal to me, I am sorry.”
Here Carandhol leaned down and kissed Erestor’s brow. “I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you as my husband, for here, I am the weak one… I had not the strength to be a good husband to you and not the strength to let you go…but I will now. I will let you go of our vows made so very long ago.” Carandhol sighed heavily, and he looked at Elrond. “Is this possible my lord?”
Glorfindel growled, “of all the selfish, heartless things to ask in front of Erestor!”
Elrond looked harshly at Glorfindel, “Calm yourself, Glorfindel!” Elrond warned him as he moved to Erestor’s side. “Your heart will not let your head think clearly!”
“Why do you seek this now Carandhol?” Elrond urged him as he checked Erestor’s pulse. Erestor’s pulse felt stronger than this morning.
“I, I want Erestor to be at peace, to not be burdened by our vows any longer. So he can be free of the constraints of this façade we are entangled in.” He answered deep into Elrond’s eyes.
“I suspect you wish to be able to be free for your own pursuits as well?” asked Elrond skeptically, “for I do not believe that suddenly you have become altruistic in regards to Erestor.”
Carandhol was unable to hold his lord’s gaze now. “I have done lots of pondering on this contract between the two of you, as between all made during that unstable time. Those who called this into being are no longer with us on Arda. The lands for which this contract was writ are also no longer. There was never a bond of love between the two of you, am I right?” Elrond asked.
“Aye, you are right.” Carandhol replied heavily.
“Your marriage was for political gain, and as such, was a contract; a contract that has served it’s purpose…. long ago….” Here, Elrond smoothed Erestor’s hair back in a gesture of empathy and comfort. “If Erestor awakens, then I will grant you this pardon if he so desires it.”
Carandhol nodded once and moved to whisper to Erestor once more. “Forgive me for all the pain I have caused you, and awaken to those who would have you….” Carandhol stood and looked directly at the golden warrior in the corner, whose hands were clenched in restraint at his side. He turned and left the room.
TBC
The following day found Erestor unchanged. Elrond was pacing back and forth in his study. He did not want to give up on Erestor, though he knew he had to send him to the Havens as quickly as possible. Making plans in his mind as to whom would accompany Erestor on his journey, he heard a knock at the sturdy wooden door. Sighing heavily at the intrusion into his thoughts, he called out in an annoyed voice. "Enter!"
The door opened to reveal a weary looking Carandhol. Elrond practically growled at him. "What is it that you want, captain?"
"M-my Lord Elrond," he bowed, "I wish to speak of Erestor”.
"Ha! Now suddenly you have a voice for his concern." Elrond sneered, no longer holding back his disdain for this elf's actions and inactions.
"Please, my lord, hear me out, I -I owe this much to Erestor, to you, and to Imladris." Carandhol pleaded into Elrond's eyes.
Elrond looked deeply into the red-haired captain’s eyes and saw only sincerity. "Very well, speak, whilst I can stand you in front of me."
"W-will Erestor fade?" Carandhol whispered to Elrond's straining ears.
"He is fading as we speak." Elrond's eyes glistened with anger and unshed tears.
Carandhol visibly gulped and his hands were shaking. "Of all that I dislike in Erestor, I do not wish this for him. He has done nothing to deserve such an end." Elrond let him speak without interrupting him.
"When I first saw him, I thought he an ellith," Carandhol slightly laughed. "He was as always lean, and his hair so long, in addition to wearing robes," he shook his head in remembrance, "even his fair countenance spoke of maideness. Though I was used to lying with warriors, he was beautiful and peaked my interest."
Elrond could not believe what he was hearing, Erestor lay fading, and he speaks of their coupling.
Carandhol sighed heavily and continued, "I soon grew bored, and we had nothing in common… I began to take lovers...he, he never told me to stop… so I took it as a silent acceptance.”
"Erestor was just barely past majority, he knew not warrior ways!" Elrond replied through clenched teeth. "Did you ever talk to him about your needs?"
"NO! No I did not!" Carandhol raised his voice faintly. “I have wanted out of this marriage since the very first year we were wed!"
"Then why did you agree to this?" Elrond tried to understand it all.
"I did it for my King, I did it for Gil-Galad. I am a warrior, I was his warrior, and would do anything he so asked of me--I pledged my sword to him in allegiance." Carandhol looked down, adding, "It was my duty."
"After Eregion fell and we followed you to Imladris, I have ever pledged my sword to you, my Lord Elrond." Carandhol could not meet Elrond’s gaze.
"I-I am nothing but a warrior, that is all I know, and now, my brothers-in arms shun me." Carandhol said defeated.
"Carandhol, you have always served Imladris well, that I cannot deny," Elrond softened his voice. "Though the abuse you put my chief advisor and friend through was lecherous indeed!"
"May, may I see him?" Carandhol asked Elrond weakly.
"Why?"
"So, so I may ask his forgiveness."
"And then what?"
“And then I will say good…bye.” Here the captain’s voice hitched in his speech.
Elrond nodded his answer, “Follow me, but be wary, Glorfindel is with him.”
“Glorfindel?” Carandhol asked and inwardly shuddered. “Why?” Elrond did not answer him.
Elrond told Carandhol to wait outside the room while he went in to check on Erestor. Glorfindel looked up upon seeing his lord enter. He was immediately on his feet whence he saw the look in Elrond’s eyes and the deep crease in his brow. “What is it, my lord?” he asked.
“Glorfindel, you will heed what I say.” Elrond told his seneschal with all the authority he could muster at that moment.
Glorfindel nodded once in reply, wondering what was about to take place.
“Carandhol is outside and wishes to see Erestor, and you will do nothing to stop him.” Elrond held up his hand to silence Glorfindel before he could say anything. “You will go to the far corner of the room and stay there, understood?” Here, Elrond raised an eyebrow in query.
Glorfindel was fuming! What could Cara possibly want with Erestor? He walked to the far corner and watched. He would not go against Elrond’s orders. All his instincts were honed and ready to strike at a moments notice.
Elrond walked to the door and gestured for Carandhol to bid entrance. Slowly, the red-haired captain did so, and found he could not look upon Erestor. Elrond gestured for him to continue on to the bedside.
Elrond then went to stand next to Glorfindel. They would not leave Erestor alone, not after what Elrond had overheard the last time Carandhol was alone with Erestor.
Carandhol forced himself to look upon the fading elf before him. They were together for millennia. He did not wish Erestor to fade. He deserved no such fate. He just knew that they were not meant to be. Erestor’s eyes closed in this unnatural sleep bothered the captain the most, for in all those years together he had never seen Erestor close his eyes in sleep…not once.
Sighing and gathering all the strength he could muster together, Cara walked to Erestor’s side. He gazed upon that face he knew as well as his own. “Why did you never fight back?” He whispered for Erestor’s ears only. Erestor’s head moved at the sound of his husband’s voice.
Glorfindel moved to go to his beloved’s side upon seeing that reaction from Erestor. Elrond moved his arm across the warrior’s chest to restrain him. “Stop, ‘Fin,” he commanded, “he has caused no harm to Erestor,” sighed Elrond, “at least he has responded, this is a good sign, he has not given up his struggle.” Glorfindel relaxed once more under Elrond’s touch, though he wished only to protect Erestor from the one beside him.
“Never once did you fight by my side, not in Eregion, not during the Last Alliance.” Carandhol sighed. “I never understood you… how one could be so passive all the time… perhaps, that in itself, is a strength all it’s own.” Here he paused, “ however, that is not my way, Erestor, and I found that I cannot respect that in you.” Here Carandhol shook his head and winced form the pain it caused his face. “Your gentleness does not appeal to me, I am sorry.”
Here Carandhol leaned down and kissed Erestor’s brow. “I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you as my husband, for here, I am the weak one… I had not the strength to be a good husband to you and not the strength to let you go…but I will now. I will let you go of our vows made so very long ago.” Carandhol sighed heavily, and he looked at Elrond. “Is this possible my lord?”
Glorfindel growled, “of all the selfish, heartless things to ask in front of Erestor!”
Elrond looked harshly at Glorfindel, “Calm yourself, Glorfindel!” Elrond warned him as he moved to Erestor’s side. “Your heart will not let your head think clearly!”
“Why do you seek this now Carandhol?” Elrond urged him as he checked Erestor’s pulse. Erestor’s pulse felt stronger than this morning.
“I, I want Erestor to be at peace, to not be burdened by our vows any longer. So he can be free of the constraints of this façade we are entangled in.” He answered deep into Elrond’s eyes.
“I suspect you wish to be able to be free for your own pursuits as well?” asked Elrond skeptically, “for I do not believe that suddenly you have become altruistic in regards to Erestor.”
Carandhol was unable to hold his lord’s gaze now. “I have done lots of pondering on this contract between the two of you, as between all made during that unstable time. Those who called this into being are no longer with us on Arda. The lands for which this contract was writ are also no longer. There was never a bond of love between the two of you, am I right?” Elrond asked.
“Aye, you are right.” Carandhol replied heavily.
“Your marriage was for political gain, and as such, was a contract; a contract that has served it’s purpose…. long ago….” Here, Elrond smoothed Erestor’s hair back in a gesture of empathy and comfort. “If Erestor awakens, then I will grant you this pardon if he so desires it.”
Carandhol nodded once and moved to whisper to Erestor once more. “Forgive me for all the pain I have caused you, and awaken to those who would have you….” Carandhol stood and looked directly at the golden warrior in the corner, whose hands were clenched in restraint at his side. He turned and left the room.
TBC