An Elf's Rose

CHAPTER 14





Rose sat slumped in the school desk, waiting for class to begin. The traffic on the 405 had been hideous and she had not slept well at all the night before, disturbed by dreams of Orlando falling, over and over, with that look of surprise on his face. She always tried to stop him, grab him, but he always slipped through her fingers.



“Hiya.”



Rose looked up to see the boy from the day before sit in the desk next to hers. He was very cute – in a little boy sort of way, with his short, spiky brown hair and wide brown puppy-dog eyes. He even had a tiny gold bangle earring in his right ear lobe. She sat up and combed her hair back with her fingers. She felt very old.



“Hi. Thomas, right?”



He smiled widely. “Yeah. You’re Rose, right?” He held out his hand.



She nodded, smiling half-heartedly, and took it in hers. “Nice to meet you. Again.”



“Same here. Hope you don’t mind my saying so, but you look – well, like you had a nightlong fight with your pillow.”



Rose laughed weakly. “I did. How’d you guess?”



He put a finger to his eye and drew the bottom lid down a bit. “I’m very observant. I am going to be a writer, so I watch everything.”



“Me too. A writer, I mean.”



Thomas grinned. “Oh yeah? Great! I’m sure we’ll be taking lots of classes together then.”



“I guess so.”



“What’s your last class today?”



“Composition and grammar from two to three thirty.”



“Oh that’s perfect. There’s a bunch of us freshmen getting together at four and 2heading to the beach at Marina del Rey. We were gonna grab some burgers at Islands and maybe catch some waves at sunset. Meet us at the student lounge when your class is over.”



“I –“ Rose was torn. She wanted very much to go and meet other students and yearned to hang out and have a good time. But there was a stronger pull on her heart. “I’d love to, really, but I have to feed and walk Maude and then I have to go to the hospital.”



“Oh.” Long pause. “You’re boyfriend?”



“Yes.”



Thomas nodded, tapping his pencil on his organizer. “Hey, I understand. Maybe, uh, some other time then.” He shifted in the seat. “Is he, uh, doing better?”



“Yes and no.” She shrugged. “It’s been very hard on everyone, especially him.”



“Yeah. I guess it would be.” Thomas sat back in the desk chair. He was obviously very disappointed she wasn’t coming.



Rose didn’t know what made her do it, but she opened her purse and took out the snapshot she’d begged from Robert that first night at the house when she saw it in his room. It was a close-up of Orlando, Sean and Marc at a party somewhere, arms around each other’s shoulders, holding beers and grinning like maniacs. Orlando looked positively gorgeous with his sculpted cheekbones flushed with alcohol and laughter, a wicked glint in his ocean grey eyes, his dimple deepened by his wide smile and his gold silk braid hanging down his chest.



Rose handed the picture to Thomas and pointed him out. “That’s my Orlando,” she told him softly, a shiver of pleasure running through her belly. ”He’s an Elf.”



Thomas looked at it a long time, expressionless, then handed it back to her, nodding to himself. “Can’t compete with that, now can I?” he muttered.



“What do you mean?” she asked, puzzled. “We can be friends, can’t we?”



“Sure. Yeah, of course.” He tapped his pencil again and smiled ruefully at her. “I hope he treats you well, Rose.”



She looked at Orlando’s photo again. “Yes. Yes, he does.”



~~~



When Rose got to Cedars later that evening, she found that Orlando had been moved to a private room, and all of his plants and flowers moved in with him, making it look like a jungle. The room also held Robert, his office manager Sondra, Marc and Sean, who were all talking quietly. Sean spotted her first, hovering at the doorway. He walked over.



“Hey,” he said softly, giving her a hug.



“Hey.” She hugged him tightly back and let go, looking up at him. “Your black eye looks better.”



“Yeah, it’s going down. You look like hell, though.” He frowned as he brushed her unruly curls out of her eyes with his fingers.



Rose grimaced. “I guess I do since you’re not the first one to point it out to me.” She rubbed her face with her hands. “I didn’t sleep very well last night and traffic was just hellish today. How is he doing?”



Sean shrugged. “Well, you know. He’s pretty freaked. He hasn’t said much at all. He won’t even talk to his dad or Sondra. He just turns his head away.”



“Turns his head?”



“Yeah, they took him off that horror movie contraption. They got him laying his head on this doughnut pw, tw, the kind you sit on when your ass hurts.” He breathed a ghost of a laugh. “Marc tried to get him to react by telling him that he’s always known Orli was a hemorrhoid, and this was proof positive.”



Rose snickered, despite herself. “Did he? React, I mean.”



“No. He just lays there like he’s still in the fucking coma.” Sean swiped at his eyes. “Shit. I never thought I’d see Orli brought so low, man. He’s always been like our rock, you know? Even when we got him to do crazy shit, we always knew that he’d be alright, and we’d be alright.” He pulled his cigarette pack from his pocket. “I need a smoke.” He walked away without a backward glance.



Rose still felt trepidation and she stayed in the doorway. Sondra finally looked up from her seat at Orlando’s side.



“Robert,” Sondra said softly, pointing with her chin towards Rose. He turned and smiled.



“Sweetheart.” He went to her and embraced her gently. “How’re things? Getting along well on campus? Making friends?” She nodded into his dress shirt, inhaling his cologne. Her grip tightened and he responded by caressing her back. “Are you alright, love?”



She wondered at how he could think of her and her petty concerns when his son lay unresponsive and despondent in a hospital bed. “He’s still not --?”



Robert sighed. “It’s going to take some time but he’ll adjust. He’s just had a bad day – lots of prodding and questions. And the move to this room exhausted him. He hates feeling so helpless.” He pushed back her curls like Sean had done. “A bit of good news, though.”



“Oh?”



“Yes, I got a call back from the foundation and they gave me the phone numbers of a few surgeons back East that are specializing in some new techniques. I called their offices and they’ve requested Orli’s X-rays and charts, to see if he’s a good candidate for it. We’ll find out in a couple of days if any are willing to fly out.”



Rose nodded, still resisting coming into the room. “That’s certainly good news.”



“Rosie,” Robert urged, pulling on her hand, “Come talk to him. I know it’s difficult, and it’s not going to get any easier. But please, don’t give up on him.”



Rose watched as Sondra got up from her chair and leaned over and kissed Orlando’s forehead. He didn’t respond, staring at the ceiling with unseeing eyes.



Marc followed her out, a look of puzzlement and sorrow on his normally cheerful features. He smiled at Rose weakly and shrugged. “Maybe you can help him to get out of this funk, Rosie. He might not be able to ignore you.”



The three of them left her alone, after a small but strong push into the room by Robert. He closed the door behind him. To gather coe, Re, Rose stood silently watching him breathe.



“Who’s there?” Orlando asked, turning his head on the pillow, eyes moving restlessly. “Who is it? I don’t want any more goddam needles.”



She didn’t answer but moved forward, her Keds silent on the tile. He wore a hospital gown now, and it made him look thin.



“Orlando,” she whispered, placing a hand gently on his right wrist, avoiding both the intravenous tubing and jarring his broken hand.



He flinched and grimaced, pulling his arm away from her touch. “Rose,” he gasped. “What are you doing here?”



“What am I doing here?” she asked, incredulously.



“You should be home. You’ve got better things to do.”



“I can’t think of one, “ she whispered. Her heart hurt at the pain in his face.



“Jesus.” He took a deep breath. “Rose, I can’t – can’t let you burden yourself with this. It’s not right.”



“Orlando –“



“No. No, I won’t let you! You have no idea what it’s like to care for someone in a wheelchair!” he told her, raising his voice.



Rose felt her own temper flare. “Oh? And what makes you such an expert --?”



“Because I know what it is, damn you! My grandfather was sick and in a wheelchair for ten years! My mother had to bathe him and fucking wipe his arse! I won’t even be able to take a piss by myself, for chrissakes!” He turned his head away from her, his breathing erratic and catching in his throat from swallowing his sobs.



Robert poked his head in the door in alarm, but Rose motioned him out. He nodded and disappeared.



“I’m not giving up on you, Orlando Bloom. And I’m not going to let you give up on yourself.”



“I’m not doing it,” he whispered, voice hoarse with emotion.



“What? Not doing what?”



“I’m not going to live like that. That’s no life.”



“Lot’s of handicapped people lead –“



“You don’t get it, do you?” he snarled, turning back to her. Rose winced at the look on his face. “I am not doing it,” he repeated, enunciating carefully.



“Orlando, I know it’s a shock and you’re upset right now but–“



He turned away again, interrupting her. “You think you’ll be able to handle it now. You think you have the strength and the patience and the tolerance. And maybe you will for a while. But how long will it last, Rose? What about in six months? A year? This is going to be for the rest of my damn life,” he panted, voice ragged. “You’ll be involved in school and meet lots of new people and you’ll start – resenting me. You’re a beautiful girl, Rosie. How long do you think it’ll be before there’s a young man pursuing you, a man that can take you places and do things I can’t. A man that can take care of you the way you deserve? Not long at all, I’m sure.”



Rose felt sick to her stomach. He was voicing fears that even she had refused to acknowledge. And how could he know about Thomas and his invitations?



“I don’t want your pity, Rose,” Orlando whispered. “But it’s all moot anyway. I won’t be around that long to see it happen.”



“Wha—what do you mean?” Rose asked, the hair prickling at the back of her neck. He shrugged a shoulder but didn’t answer.



Rose was surprised at how furious she became. She breathed heavily through her nose and clenched her fists at her sides. “You’re lucky you have a head injury,” she hissed, “because I really want to bitch-slap you right now.”



Orlando pulled up his shoulders and crossed his arms over his chest but didn’t reply.



“You – “ Rose bit her lip, trying to control the volume of her voice. goi going to forget everything you just said, because it seems all your good sense got knocked out, along with your brains.”



She moved around the bed and grabbed the sides of his head in both hands so he couldn’t turn away anymore. He grimaced and squeezed his eyes shut.



“How DARE you threaten me with suicide! How could you even contemplate doing such a horrible, cowardly thing? Do you have any—“ Rose choked on her ire, drawing a shaky breath. “—any idea how many people love you? How many people showed up to offer encouragement and prayers? That your father would gladly put himself in the poorhouse to give you every chance possible? That Sean and Marc would gladly take turns to wipe your ass if you asked it? Even if you didn’t ask it?”



She let go of his head abruptly, suddenly very tired. “Where is the sensei that taught me that strength is not only in the arms and legs, but in the head and heart? Where is the sensei that saw strength in me that I didn’t even know existed? Can’t he see it in himself?”



She looked down at him, heart breaking to see the tears flowing from under his lids and his arms trembling as he gripped himself. His lips were parted and grimacing, and he gasped and sobbed and swallowed convulsively.



Orlando opened his eyes, and she saw his soul revealed to her in those ocean grey depths, with all his fear and pain androw.row. She placed a hand on his forehead, to calm him.



~~~



Orli felt her warm hand on him like a benediction. He was in an agony of conflicting emotions. Dear God, he didn’t want to lose her. He wanted her with him for always. But it was inevitable. She would find someone who wasn’t such a burden to her and it would kill him. He couldn’t bear the thought of it.



“Rose,” he whimpered. “I’m so afraid! Oh God, I’ve never been so afraid! Please, d – don’t leave me. I can’t bear it.”



He felt her warm breath against his face. “I’ll never leave you,” she whispered, and kissed his mouth hard.