In Her Words

Disclaimer: Tolkien owns them, I merely play with them.
Title: In Her Words
Author: Jade (aka Aragornsfavorite)
Email: elvenjade2@gmail.com
Warning: AU, angst, implied Slash.
Rating: R mostly
Type; FPH..FPS(implied)
Pairing: Elladan/OFC.
Chapter: 13/15
Feedback: more reviews means more chapters
Summary: Glorfindel reads from Anira's journal

A/N Only two more chapters after this. I hate to see it end but I already have the sequel in mind..

A/N2 In Her Words has been nominated for best origanal character for the 2007 MPA ( My Precious Awards)

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Chapter 13..

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Glorfindel was resting on his bed, Anira’s journal lay open in his lap as he flipped through the pages, reading some of the entries he had already read a few times. He considered giving the journal to Elladan to return it to Anira, he just was not sure he could part with it. It was all he had left of his daughter. He looked up as his door opened and saw Erestor step inside slowly.
“ It is almost time to join the others” Erestor said quietly as he took the book from Glorfindel. “ I promise no juice this time” he added teasingly. Glorfindel rolled his eyes as she sat on the edge of the bed.
“ I would hope not” Glorfindel replied.” I would hate for any elflings to go without juice should I take a linking to drinking it.”
Erestor chuckled, glad to catch a glimpse of his old friend again. The two of them shared a look then Glorfindel stood up, the journal in his hand and walked out of the room with Erestor. Both heading, in silence, to the hall of fire to join the others. As Glorfindel took his usual seat, he glanced over at Elladan. The older twin had a distant look in his eyes and appeared more tired then ever.
“ It is the reason I asked you not to wait on finishing Anira’s journal.” Elrond spoke quietly.” I do not think he will last more then a few days if he does not sail soon.”
Glorfindel nodded, knowing the elflord was right. As hard as it would be for all of them to see the twins leave, it was the only thing that would save Elladan at this point.
“It will be finished by tomorrow night.” Glorfindel replied.
“Then he will sail the day after that.” Elrond said, getting up to go sit next to Celebrian. After taking a sip of his drink, wine this time, Glorfindel opened the journal.

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I am sure we would have been there by now had Elladan not insisted we stop every now and then. I know why he is doing it as well and though I have assured him I could ride longer each time, his mind is made up. He will not having me riding for longer then needed. It is his way of showing how much he cares, though he does not have to prove this to me. As I am writing this, Elladan had taken it upon him self to give me a soothing back massage, judging by the way he leaned down and chuckled I am sure he is reading over my shoulder. I do not mind for I have nothing to hide. I have told him he can read my journal anytime he wishes but he assures me that he will not. He says I have a right to write down my personal thoughts, he should know by now that all my thoughts that I have written about are always about him. Though when I started this journal my thoughts of him were very much different then how they are now. It is still hard to believe that he has gone from being the most annoying elf I have ever met to the one I have bonded with. You cannot chose who you love and I do love him, even if he was still that annoying elf. Though if he was I am now in a better position to give him a taste of his own medicine. Somehow I doubt that is something I will ever have to worry about. That does not mean he does not still try and pull pranks on others especially when Elrohir is involved somehow. The twins will never change in that way and Rivendell would not be the same should either or both of them ever decided to leave.

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Glorfindel paused in his reading to look over at Elrond who had shifted suddenly, wrapping his arms around Celebrian. Elrohir was talking quietly to Elladan, though whatever had been said would remain between the twins only. He briefly considered closing the journal and putting t away for good. As he looked over at Erestor, who merely shook his head and he had to wonder if the other elf could read his mind of if he was just being that obvious. Once Elrond had Celebrian resting against him he nodded at Glorfindel to continue.

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Had we been anywhere else I would have been worried to be awake while Elladan is resting. However since we are still within the borders of Rivendell I know there is nothing to worry about. Elladan is more tired then he will admit. I know he has stayed up with me when I could not sleep before our wedding, or times when I was getting sick in the late ours of the night. He looks too peaceful now as he sleeps that I am enjoying watching him. Though I would not be surprised at all if he was suddenly awake and lecturing me for not getting any rest. We are a few hours away to the cabin and once again he had insisted we stop and rest. If he is making me rest this much now I wonder how long it will take us to return in a few weeks. We may have to leave a week early just to be sure we will return when we said we would.
I know he is awake now, he is playing with his ring, the one that matches the one I now wear. I had been hoping we would be on our way again soon but I know that look in his eye. The sweet seductive smile he is giving me. This rest may be lasting a while longer and I have to admit I do not mind at all.

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Elladan looked over briefly when Glorfindel had stopped reading, he was talking to Erestor though Elladan could not hear much of what was being said. He closed his eyes and could picture that day with Anira. He had wanted to get her to the cabin before anything had started between them but his desire for her had not let him wait that long. They had spent more then a few hours in that one place, taking their time to enjoy each other. By the time they had reached the cabin, Anira was riding with him. She had leaned back against him along the way and at some point had drifted off to sleep. Elladan remembered loving the feeling of having her ride with him. The soft sound of her light breathing as she rested. Once they had arrived at the cabin had had carried her inside, resting her in the bed they would share and moved to lay down with her. He had reached over and tucked her hair back behind her ear. Her eyes opened briefly, giving him a soft smile. She had whispered that she loved him and drifted back to sleep. He stayed awake most of the night just watching her sleep, his hand gently caressing her stomach.
“Elladan!” It was his father’s concerned voice that had broken through his memories. He slowly turned his head and looked towards him. Noticing his mother’s tears he looked over at his father questioningly
“Elrohir had called to you three times,” Elrond pointed out.
“ I…” Elladan looked around as saw the others all watching him. “ I was remembering.” He said quietly
“ No” Elrohir replied just as quietly.” You were fading, Elladan. I could feel it.”
Elladan looked up at his twin and saw not only the concern in his eyes but the fear as well.
“ I am sorry.” He whispered softly.
Elrohir closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath before looking back at the older twin.
“ You made me a promise” he said quietly. “ Do not break it now. If you fade then so will I.”
Elladan managed a small nod in reply, not trusting himself to speak. He felt so tired and the feeling of just giving up grew stronger each day. He was trying to hold on, to keep his promise to his twin. It was the hardest thing he was every trying to do. His reason for living was waiting for him in the Grey Havens and every time he closed his eyes he could see her waiting for him, hear her calling to him. All he wanted to do was to just close his eyes and go to her.
“Glorfindel” Elrond’s voice sounded throughout the room, catching everyone’s attention.” Read.”
Nodding, Glorfindel opened the journal again. He took a quick look at Elladan who merely nodded his way.

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I had not meant to fall asleep as we had rode the rest of the way to the cabin. The feel of Elladan behind me and his arms around me had not only made me feel relaxed but safe as well. I only vaguely remember waking up and whispering to him, seeing his sweet smile before I had drifted back to sleep. The next time I woke up the room was filled with flowers, white and red roses. Elladan had come into the room carrying a small tray full of food. It was not the first time that I was brought breakfast in bed but this time seemed different. Perhaps it was the fact that this time we were bound and enjoying just time alone. It is nice to have him all to myself for a while, not have to worry about anyone coming to the door and wishing to speak to one of us for some reason or another.

After we had finished our breakfast, Elladan led me to a small lake not to far from the cabin. I had not even known it was there. Of course I had been asleep for the last part of our trip and may have missed it. We swam for a short time then spent most of the day just relaxing on the grass, snacking of some fruit that Elladan had brought with us. After all the planning it took for the wedding, it was nice to have nothing to do for a change. A chance to just relax and enjoy each other’s company. Elladan often reached over to play in my hair or to just caress my stomach softly. He would lean over occasionally to kiss me softly then more often. The last one seemed to never end, nor had I wanted it to. It was nice to lose myself in his kiss and every single touch. He learned a while ago just how to get an reaction out of me and this time was no different.

It was almost dark when we returned and Elladan insisted we enjoy a nice warm bath. I was not going to saying no to that. I have always enjoyed bathing with him, not to mention seeing him all wet. One of my favorite views and to see him with his hair wet was even better. I wonder if he would agree to just pour water over himself whenever I asked him to. The image of seeing his clothes sticking tightly to his with his hair wet was too much to ignore. Elladan looked over at me and I realized I had let out a soft moan. He merely arched an eyebrow then chuckled lightly. I am sure he’ll question me about it later and he has a way of making me talk. I am sure he’ll use every single way as well until I give in and tell him.

I am not sure at what point we had both drifted off to sleep. It was morning again when I had woken up and was glad to see that Elladan was still sleeping, or at least I had thought he was. The minute I had started to get up he had sat up with me. I assured him that nothing was wrong and he seemed to relax. Regardless, we had not left the bed for a while anyway. If this is how every morning with him will be then I look forward to each and every morning. It will be waking up alone while he is away on Duty that will be hard for me. I know we share a bond now and that I will be able to sense him anytime I wish. I just worry that should I try and reach out to him that it would distract him and cause him to be injured. If that were ever the case I would never forgive myself. I believe it would be safer if he reached to me instead. I do not think I would be in any danger should I happen to be in the library when I suddenly feel him.

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Glorfindel looked up when he heard Erestor chuckled and arched an eyebrow.
“ She has obviously never found herself buried under a pile of books after a shelf had collapsed.” Erestor said.
“ Only you can manage something like that.” Elrond chuckled at his advisor.
“Well…” Elrohir grinned, getting the others attention.
“ What did you do?” Erestor asked
“ That shelf only collapsed after Elladan and I had loosened some of its nails.” He said.
Glorfindel laughed quietly at the look Erestor had given the twins, mumbling something under his breath and them being brats no matter what their age happen to be.

“ I am tired” Elladan replied when Elrohir had leaned over to ask how he was feeling.
“ Then we shall retire for the night.” Elrohir said. He did not want his twin to push himself, not when he barely had any strength left in him as it was.
“As will the rest of u s” Elrond had added.” We’ve all been up later then usual.”
Elrohir helped his twin to his feet and had bid good night to the others as they left.
Glorfindel sat there quietly finishing his drink, pouring himself just a bit more after the others were gone.
“ Will you not sleep again tonight?” Erestor asked as he sat back down next to him.
“Will you ever stop sneaking up on me? Glorfindel asked, giving him a small smile to let him know he had just been teasing.
“Come” Erestor said, taking Glorfindel by the arm and leading him out of the great hall.” I know ways to help you relax.”

Elrohir had opened the door and then followed his twin into the room.
“ Our things will be packed by this time tomorrow.” Elrohir pointed out.
“ I will not need to take much” Elladan replied, slowly pulling off his tunic. “ Elrohir, if you are unsure of leaving I can make…
Elrohir shook his head and had gripped the arms of the chair he had been sitting in. It was all he could do not to reach over and shake his twin.
“ I am sure” He replied. “ I can not see myself staying here if you have sailed.” He added.
Elladan sighed, to tired to try and argue. He did not want his twin regretting his decision to sail. Once they left there would be no coming back.
He watched silently as Elrohir had gotten out of the chair and moved to lay down in the spare bed. Turning onto his side, Elladan stared at the far wall before closing his eyes.
“we can talk more about it in the morning” He heard Elrohir say.
“If I do not fade during the night” Elladan whispered to himself after a long while. Once he closed his eyes, it had not taken long for him to drift off to sleep.

Elrohir was sure that Elladan had assumed he was already asleep and had not heard his comment. He had no plans to sleep at all now. He could only hope that he would sense it if Elladan was fading and would stay awake watching him all night if he had to..” One more night.” He whispered as he watched Elladan sleeping.” Just hold one a while longer.” He quietly pleaded. He was for once glad for the darkness of the room, not wanting Elladan to see his own tears should he wake up.

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TBC…