Feel so different
folder
-Multi-Age › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
17
Views:
8,495
Reviews:
41
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
-Multi-Age › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
17
Views:
8,495
Reviews:
41
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings (and associated) book series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Something I can never ever be.
Title; Feel so different (13/16)
Author; Az (ElladanadoresElrohir@gmx.net)
Parings; Legolas/Elrohir Glorfindel/Elladan –implied, sadly a smutless chapter
Warnings; MPREG, AU, Angst
Rating; none
Summary; after Legolas’ child is born, he finds that there are still loose ends that needs to be fixed.
Disclaimer; don’t own them, don't sue me
Authors note; this is the sequel to Underneath it all, I want to thank all of you who gave me such sweet fb when I really, really needed it. And I want FB as always (I live for it you know :P ) – hmmm I forgot that I cannot remember where it is I got Celendir from, but I know it had something to do with Miriel :*smiles*
- Please visit my homepage http://www.nad-no-ennas.net
This is betaed by Lisbet Karlsdottir – thanks sweetie.
-Az
********************************************************************’’
Come on, step inside, and you'll realize.
Tell me what you need, tell me what to be.
What's your vision?
You'll see, what do you expect of me?
I cant live that lie.
You!
Really want me to be a good son. Why?
You make me feel like no one.
Let me strip the pain, let me not give in.
Free me of your life, inside my heart dies.
Your dreams never achieved, don't lay that shit on me.
Let me live my... life.
Korn – Dead bodies everywhere
******************************************
Chapter 13 – Something I can never ever be.
Days passed in silence between Legolas and Elrohir, and even though the half-elf ached for some intimacy from his husband, he respected Legolas’ need for sorting out his thoughts before facing his father. The tension between them seemed to build the closer they came to Mirkwood. And once they steered onto the path that led right into the forest, Legolas no longer even tolerated the touch of his husband.
The last night they spent in the forest was also spent in silence, with Elrohir watching the flames, and Legolas sitting on the other side of the fire. Elrohir wanted to say something to sooth Legolas somehow, and reassure him that whatever happened, he would stay with him, but he remembered when he had tried to take Legolas’ hand earlier the blond had shied away from him.
Right now Elrohir wished he had never had this stupid idea that his husband would sort out what laid heavy on his mind. He wished they were home in Imladris, eating a proper dinner and watching Amcar struggling with his soft toy star, with squeals of happiness every time he dropped it in his own head. Elrohir sighed. If Legolas could endure this so could he, and he rolled up under his blanket, hoping he would get some sleep this night.
--
Next morning, they packed up and rode on, finally reaching the boundaries of Mirkwood, and now Elrohir felt a cold hand in his. He turned and smiled at Legolas who managed a strained smile back, and nodded to Elrohir. “I am ready,” he whispered and spurred his horse and rode with Elrohir into the woods.
After moments they heard a voice yell. “Halt, strangers!” cried an elf and he dropped down from a tree in front of them. He wore the uniform of Mirkwood. At first the elf looked sinister, and Elrohir thought about going for his sword, but then the guard's facial expression changed and now he only looked puzzled. “Your highness?” the guard whispered and stepped closer. “Prince Legolas? Is that really you?”
“A-aye,” Legolas whispered and squeezed Elrohir’s hand hard. “Will you grant me entrance, for I wish audience with my father.”
“My prince, do you not recognize me? It is I, Telin,” the guard said and pulled back his hood, allowing his own red-golden hair flow in the mild breeze.
“Telin?” Legolas said and looked over at Elrohir, and then back at the elf in front of them. “You gave me your bow.”
“Yes I did, and I hope it kept you safe,” Telin said and smiled.
“I still carry it,” Legolas answered. “So yes, it kept both me and my baby safe.”
“If you don’t mind me asking,” Telin started and moved closer to the horses.
“I had a son,” Legolas said, sensing the question. “His name is Amcar, but I left him in Lorien.”
“Congratulations!” Telin said and smiled. “Amcar is a beautiful name for a no doubt beautiful babe.”
They stopped the conversation there and Telin nodded to someone in the forest. “Ride on, my prince. I pray all goes well with your father.”
“So do I, and thank you for all you have done, Telin,” Legolas answered and spurred his horse as soon as the guard stepped off the trail.
And so they rode to the palace in the heart of Mirkwood.
--
His arrival made quite the uproar, and once outside his father’s door, he let go of Elrohir’s hand, and spoke to the guard at the door. “Will you say Legolas and Prince Elrohir are here, and we wish to see King Thranduil.”
The guard nodded and went into the hall, only to come out a second later deathly palThe The king will see you in his study,” he said.
Legolas nodded and began to move forward, as did Elrohir, but the guard stopped Elrohir. “Not you.”
And for the first time Elrohir spoke. “What? Why?”
“You are to come with me,” the guard said and shrugged. “The kings instructions.”
Legolas just nodded at Elrohir, who looked like he was in inner turmoil. “Please do as he says, Elrohir.”
“But I promised...” the Rivendell prince started, but Legolas cut him off with a hand gesture.
“I know, but this I apparently have to do myself,” Legolas answered and smiled before he turned and left towards his fathers study.
---
He walked down the familiar corridor on the huge talan, and knocked lightly on the door before he entered. He kept his gaze locked to the floor and his heart beat as wildly as a rabbit's. “Thank you for seeing me, Thranduil King,” he mumbled.
Thranduil looked Legolas up and down before he said softly, “Raise your head Legolas, look at me.”
Legolas looked up, and saw his father for the first time in what seemed decades. “I came to settle our differences if you wish your, your majesty,” he said and fought hard not to look at the floor once more.
“Legolas please, I am your father,” Thranduil said and stretched a hand towards his son, who immediately took it and stepped closer.
“I missed you, father,” he admitted.
“And I missed you,” Thranduil said. “So aou hou home to stay?”
“No,” Legolas said feeling guilty, and kneeled in front of his father’s chair, never letting go of the hand. “I will journey back with Elrohir to Lorien, and to my son.”
“Do you call that aberration your son?” Thranduil asked with genuine worry.
Legolas' face hardened. “Yes, he is my son, and he is not a freak father, he is my *son*, just as Elrohir is my husband.”
“Did that smitten half-elf father the child?” Thranduil said, still staring at his son in disbelief.
“He is my *husband* father, he is not smitten, nor did he father Amcar.”
“Pray tell son, who did father or what you call it, that *thing*,” the king said, keeping his iron grip on Legolas’ hand.
“The chief of the Galadhrim,” Legolas answered truthfully.
“A servant,” Thranduil stated. “A servant, and a half elf. Legolas, how could you?” he said in a blaming tone.
“Father – don’t,” Legolas said and looked at his father pleadingly.
“I am the king, child. I can think as I like,” Thranduil sneered in a tone that allowed no discussion.
“I wish only for a mending, father, there is no reason for a feud, please…” Legolas said and rested his head against his father's hand.
“There are no ill words between you and I, my son,” Thranduil said.
Legolas looked up again, and smiled. “Does this mean you will accept Elrohir and Amcar?”
The king chuckled. “Do not worry, my son. They need not to be a part of your life.”
The prince paled. “They are my husband and son, they *are* my life, father.”
Thranduil shook his head. “So young, and so naïve.”
Legolas let go of his father and quickly moved back from the king. “What did you do, father? Where is Elrohir?”
“Not in Mirkwood anymore,” Thranduil answered cryptically.
“Father!” Legolas exclaimed. “What did you do to Elrohir?” The prince was on the verge of screaming, but he resisted, and instead he ran a hand through his hair.
“He was escorted to the border, nothing more,” Thranduil said calmly and folded his hands under his chin.
“We are bound to one another, father, you had no right,” Legolas gasped and turned to leave his father's study.
“As I said, my son, I have every right to everything, I am the king, and besides I a I am your father,” Thranduil replied.
“I came for truce, father,” Legolas said and narrowed his eyes. “Banning my husband does not seem like a act of kindness to me.”
“Some day you will see I did you a favour, my son,” Thranduil whispered.
“I will rue the day,” Legolas hissed and picked something from his pocket and tossed it on the table.
“What is this?” Thranduil said and reached for the object.
“It is my royal pin,” Legolas said coldly. “You keep it, Thranduil king, for I have no need for it.”
Thranduil paled and looked up at Legolas. “You don’t really mean that, you'll see. You will forget about this foolish little fling of yours in time.”
“Father!” Legolas yelled, and slammed his fist into the wooden desk. “Amcar is my *son*, and Elrohir my husband; if you ban them from your kingdom, you ban me also.”
The king frowned. “Is that a fact? And who said you would be allowed to leave?”
“Are you going to shackle me up in your dungeon, father?” Legolas asked, fearing that this might be just what his father intended.
“Mayhap,” Thranduil chuckled.
My father has gone mad, Legolas thought to himself and shook his head. “I am sorry it had to be like this,” Legolas whispered, and felt ridiculously close to tears. He had loved his father once, and in so many ways he still did. He missed the elf that sat on the other side of the desk terribly. But his love for his child exceeded the love he had for his father. “Perhaps we will see each other again someday under better circumstances.” Legolas turned to leave. He heard Thranduil yell behind him, but he paid no heed to his words and angry warnings.
A guard tried to stop him, but he quickly drew his knives and hissed, “If you hold your life dear, fetch me my horse instead.” He was surprised when the guard complied, and he rushed after him to the stables. He was in too much of a hurry to pay attention to the pain in his heart. But things could be no other way.
**********
-tbc-
Author; Az (ElladanadoresElrohir@gmx.net)
Parings; Legolas/Elrohir Glorfindel/Elladan –implied, sadly a smutless chapter
Warnings; MPREG, AU, Angst
Rating; none
Summary; after Legolas’ child is born, he finds that there are still loose ends that needs to be fixed.
Disclaimer; don’t own them, don't sue me
Authors note; this is the sequel to Underneath it all, I want to thank all of you who gave me such sweet fb when I really, really needed it. And I want FB as always (I live for it you know :P ) – hmmm I forgot that I cannot remember where it is I got Celendir from, but I know it had something to do with Miriel :*smiles*
- Please visit my homepage http://www.nad-no-ennas.net
This is betaed by Lisbet Karlsdottir – thanks sweetie.
-Az
********************************************************************’’
Come on, step inside, and you'll realize.
Tell me what you need, tell me what to be.
What's your vision?
You'll see, what do you expect of me?
I cant live that lie.
You!
Really want me to be a good son. Why?
You make me feel like no one.
Let me strip the pain, let me not give in.
Free me of your life, inside my heart dies.
Your dreams never achieved, don't lay that shit on me.
Let me live my... life.
Korn – Dead bodies everywhere
******************************************
Chapter 13 – Something I can never ever be.
Days passed in silence between Legolas and Elrohir, and even though the half-elf ached for some intimacy from his husband, he respected Legolas’ need for sorting out his thoughts before facing his father. The tension between them seemed to build the closer they came to Mirkwood. And once they steered onto the path that led right into the forest, Legolas no longer even tolerated the touch of his husband.
The last night they spent in the forest was also spent in silence, with Elrohir watching the flames, and Legolas sitting on the other side of the fire. Elrohir wanted to say something to sooth Legolas somehow, and reassure him that whatever happened, he would stay with him, but he remembered when he had tried to take Legolas’ hand earlier the blond had shied away from him.
Right now Elrohir wished he had never had this stupid idea that his husband would sort out what laid heavy on his mind. He wished they were home in Imladris, eating a proper dinner and watching Amcar struggling with his soft toy star, with squeals of happiness every time he dropped it in his own head. Elrohir sighed. If Legolas could endure this so could he, and he rolled up under his blanket, hoping he would get some sleep this night.
--
Next morning, they packed up and rode on, finally reaching the boundaries of Mirkwood, and now Elrohir felt a cold hand in his. He turned and smiled at Legolas who managed a strained smile back, and nodded to Elrohir. “I am ready,” he whispered and spurred his horse and rode with Elrohir into the woods.
After moments they heard a voice yell. “Halt, strangers!” cried an elf and he dropped down from a tree in front of them. He wore the uniform of Mirkwood. At first the elf looked sinister, and Elrohir thought about going for his sword, but then the guard's facial expression changed and now he only looked puzzled. “Your highness?” the guard whispered and stepped closer. “Prince Legolas? Is that really you?”
“A-aye,” Legolas whispered and squeezed Elrohir’s hand hard. “Will you grant me entrance, for I wish audience with my father.”
“My prince, do you not recognize me? It is I, Telin,” the guard said and pulled back his hood, allowing his own red-golden hair flow in the mild breeze.
“Telin?” Legolas said and looked over at Elrohir, and then back at the elf in front of them. “You gave me your bow.”
“Yes I did, and I hope it kept you safe,” Telin said and smiled.
“I still carry it,” Legolas answered. “So yes, it kept both me and my baby safe.”
“If you don’t mind me asking,” Telin started and moved closer to the horses.
“I had a son,” Legolas said, sensing the question. “His name is Amcar, but I left him in Lorien.”
“Congratulations!” Telin said and smiled. “Amcar is a beautiful name for a no doubt beautiful babe.”
They stopped the conversation there and Telin nodded to someone in the forest. “Ride on, my prince. I pray all goes well with your father.”
“So do I, and thank you for all you have done, Telin,” Legolas answered and spurred his horse as soon as the guard stepped off the trail.
And so they rode to the palace in the heart of Mirkwood.
--
His arrival made quite the uproar, and once outside his father’s door, he let go of Elrohir’s hand, and spoke to the guard at the door. “Will you say Legolas and Prince Elrohir are here, and we wish to see King Thranduil.”
The guard nodded and went into the hall, only to come out a second later deathly palThe The king will see you in his study,” he said.
Legolas nodded and began to move forward, as did Elrohir, but the guard stopped Elrohir. “Not you.”
And for the first time Elrohir spoke. “What? Why?”
“You are to come with me,” the guard said and shrugged. “The kings instructions.”
Legolas just nodded at Elrohir, who looked like he was in inner turmoil. “Please do as he says, Elrohir.”
“But I promised...” the Rivendell prince started, but Legolas cut him off with a hand gesture.
“I know, but this I apparently have to do myself,” Legolas answered and smiled before he turned and left towards his fathers study.
---
He walked down the familiar corridor on the huge talan, and knocked lightly on the door before he entered. He kept his gaze locked to the floor and his heart beat as wildly as a rabbit's. “Thank you for seeing me, Thranduil King,” he mumbled.
Thranduil looked Legolas up and down before he said softly, “Raise your head Legolas, look at me.”
Legolas looked up, and saw his father for the first time in what seemed decades. “I came to settle our differences if you wish your, your majesty,” he said and fought hard not to look at the floor once more.
“Legolas please, I am your father,” Thranduil said and stretched a hand towards his son, who immediately took it and stepped closer.
“I missed you, father,” he admitted.
“And I missed you,” Thranduil said. “So aou hou home to stay?”
“No,” Legolas said feeling guilty, and kneeled in front of his father’s chair, never letting go of the hand. “I will journey back with Elrohir to Lorien, and to my son.”
“Do you call that aberration your son?” Thranduil asked with genuine worry.
Legolas' face hardened. “Yes, he is my son, and he is not a freak father, he is my *son*, just as Elrohir is my husband.”
“Did that smitten half-elf father the child?” Thranduil said, still staring at his son in disbelief.
“He is my *husband* father, he is not smitten, nor did he father Amcar.”
“Pray tell son, who did father or what you call it, that *thing*,” the king said, keeping his iron grip on Legolas’ hand.
“The chief of the Galadhrim,” Legolas answered truthfully.
“A servant,” Thranduil stated. “A servant, and a half elf. Legolas, how could you?” he said in a blaming tone.
“Father – don’t,” Legolas said and looked at his father pleadingly.
“I am the king, child. I can think as I like,” Thranduil sneered in a tone that allowed no discussion.
“I wish only for a mending, father, there is no reason for a feud, please…” Legolas said and rested his head against his father's hand.
“There are no ill words between you and I, my son,” Thranduil said.
Legolas looked up again, and smiled. “Does this mean you will accept Elrohir and Amcar?”
The king chuckled. “Do not worry, my son. They need not to be a part of your life.”
The prince paled. “They are my husband and son, they *are* my life, father.”
Thranduil shook his head. “So young, and so naïve.”
Legolas let go of his father and quickly moved back from the king. “What did you do, father? Where is Elrohir?”
“Not in Mirkwood anymore,” Thranduil answered cryptically.
“Father!” Legolas exclaimed. “What did you do to Elrohir?” The prince was on the verge of screaming, but he resisted, and instead he ran a hand through his hair.
“He was escorted to the border, nothing more,” Thranduil said calmly and folded his hands under his chin.
“We are bound to one another, father, you had no right,” Legolas gasped and turned to leave his father's study.
“As I said, my son, I have every right to everything, I am the king, and besides I a I am your father,” Thranduil replied.
“I came for truce, father,” Legolas said and narrowed his eyes. “Banning my husband does not seem like a act of kindness to me.”
“Some day you will see I did you a favour, my son,” Thranduil whispered.
“I will rue the day,” Legolas hissed and picked something from his pocket and tossed it on the table.
“What is this?” Thranduil said and reached for the object.
“It is my royal pin,” Legolas said coldly. “You keep it, Thranduil king, for I have no need for it.”
Thranduil paled and looked up at Legolas. “You don’t really mean that, you'll see. You will forget about this foolish little fling of yours in time.”
“Father!” Legolas yelled, and slammed his fist into the wooden desk. “Amcar is my *son*, and Elrohir my husband; if you ban them from your kingdom, you ban me also.”
The king frowned. “Is that a fact? And who said you would be allowed to leave?”
“Are you going to shackle me up in your dungeon, father?” Legolas asked, fearing that this might be just what his father intended.
“Mayhap,” Thranduil chuckled.
My father has gone mad, Legolas thought to himself and shook his head. “I am sorry it had to be like this,” Legolas whispered, and felt ridiculously close to tears. He had loved his father once, and in so many ways he still did. He missed the elf that sat on the other side of the desk terribly. But his love for his child exceeded the love he had for his father. “Perhaps we will see each other again someday under better circumstances.” Legolas turned to leave. He heard Thranduil yell behind him, but he paid no heed to his words and angry warnings.
A guard tried to stop him, but he quickly drew his knives and hissed, “If you hold your life dear, fetch me my horse instead.” He was surprised when the guard complied, and he rushed after him to the stables. He was in too much of a hurry to pay attention to the pain in his heart. But things could be no other way.
**********
-tbc-