The Music in My Heart
folder
Lord of the Rings Movies › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
75
Views:
3,762
Reviews:
11
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Lord of the Rings Movies › Slash - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
75
Views:
3,762
Reviews:
11
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Lord of the Rings book series and movie series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 11 Among Friends
Title: The Music in My Heart, Chapter 11
Author:
Fandom/Pairing: Elrond/OFC, Glorfindel/Haldir, Elladan/OFC, Elrohir/Legolas, others implied
Rating:.PG13
Warning: AU --- Story set 770 years after ROTK; Some slash but, mostly het
Feedback: This is my first fanfic, so constructive feedback appreciated.
Archive:
Acknowledgements: Many thanks to Alex Cat for her help in betaing this fic.
Disclaimer: Any of the residents of Middle-earth and Aman that you recognize belong to Prof. Tolkien’s estate. The same is true about Middle-earth and Aman. I’m only visiting and admiring the “views”.
Summary: Sauron may be gone, but his legacy of evil still lingers. As Middle-earth faces the threat of another dark lord, a party of elves departs Aman on a mission for the Valar, a mission of mercy long delayed.
Chapter 11 --– Among Friends
“Counsel, conversation, encouragement, consolation, sometimes even criticism
are found at their best among friends.”
Cicero
*****
The two elves sat in companionable silence letting the peace of the morning wash over them. With the ease of old friends, the plate of pastries and fruit was shared and enjoyed. Tea cups were refreshed.
A cool morning breeze drifted across the balcony scented with an earthy mix of the mist off the waterfalls, the fragrance of roses and lavender, and the rich soil of the nearby woods. It was a scent both knew by heart. It was the scent of summer in Imladris. The scent and the quite morning ritual had been sorely missed touchstones of their friendship; ones neither had thought to share again on Middle-earth. For once, both were happy to have been wrong.
*****
Reaching over to see if the pot of tea would stretch to a third cup, Elrond studied his friend through the cover of his unbraided hair. The care lines marking his forehead and the deep grooves near his mouth had not been there at their last meeting. The face of his friend spoke of the pains and burdens he had endured these last 750 years. The timeless beauty of Erestor’s face had aged.
Hating to end the peace of the moment, Elrond took his time and considered how best to ask. Finding no easy way to broach the topic, he began. “How are you, mellon nin? Is there anything I can do to aid or comfort you?”
A small, sad smile ghosted over his face as he turned his head to meet his friend’s eyes. “Your friendship is all the aid or comfort I could ask, Elrond, and I have long known I had that.”
“I am so very sorry I was not here for you when you needed me to be. I know there was little I could have done to have changed what happened, but I would have been at your side.” Pausing he considered his next words before continuing. “I thank the Valar for the gift of your friendship and your counsel these many years. I do not know how I would have endured without your support when Celebrian was attacked, when she sailed. Your friendship offered great comfort and gave me strength. Though it is late in coming, I would offer whatever support I can as I see clearly how deeply you grieve, Gwanur-nîn.” (my brother)
In the manner of two long comfortable with sharing confidences, Erestor nodded his head and said, “Aye, I do, mellon nin. I miss her and the pain has not lessoned nor can it for we do not know what happened to her and her guard. She was the part of my soul I knew was missing and had stopped expecting to fill. Laurea brought passion and joy to my heart; she was my balance and I hers.”
“If it had not been for my daughter, I do not know how I would have found the will to survive. Seere was just a toddler when her mother disappeared. She needed me and I needed her. And now, with her visions…” He stopped speaking abruptly. “I speak out of turn. You will hear of that when you talk with her. Suffice it to say, my hopes have been raised and dashed depending on how I chose to hear them and I am confused. My daughter was deeply grieved knowing what they could do to me. It took Celeborn and me some time to convince her to tell us as she wanted to spare me.”
“But it is all part of a bigger whole and my feelings can not be protected with so much at stake.” Sighing, he added, “I should say no more. Bur you are right. The grief of my wife’s disappearance threatens to overwhelm me once again. I confess I have been waiting without any patience for your insight into her visions hoping we may yet find an answer. Seere needs guidance in understanding her gift sometimes and there are none in Imladris that can help.”
Elrond nodded his head hearing this and asked, “How great is her gift?”
“I would say she will be as powerful as you or Galadriel when she has full command of her gift. Her Maia blood runs true it seems. And, like you, she does not need an object to focus her dreams and visions. They come to her unbidden, mostly in her dreams at this point, but she is developing greater affinity for waking visions of late. Galadriel has tried to counsel her through Celeborn, but secondhand counsel through farspeak lacks the direct interaction she needs to truly understand and hone her gift. I have been hoping you might offer her that.” Erestor, as was his habit, let his tone ask the question of his friend.
“I will gladly aid her all I can, mellon nin. Since Celeborn first told me of your daughter’s gift, but refused to tell me more, I too must confess I have been waiting for the opportunity to talk with her with ill-concealed impatience.” Seeing the grin lighting his friend’s dark eyes, he smiled. “I see that does not surprise you.”
Erestor started to chuckle. “Elrond, for you, patience means events or others accommodating your time and schedule, never the other way around!”
“Aye, I learned from the best. Ereinion had less willingness to wait than any elf I have ever met!” the elf lord smirked.
“Very true. Speaking of Ereinion, has he been rehoused and returned to us?”
Elrond’s face fell. “Nay, I could find no sign nor find any word of his fate. Unless he hides from his family and friends, it seems he has not yet left the Halls of Waiting… or he has elected to go on to Eru, unable to face the pain of his life and death.”
A troubled sigh slipped from the half-elf as he stopped to ponder the fate of his friend. “I looked, Erestor. Seeing him again… being together with Celebrian in Aman... these were my hopes for so long. They gave me comfort and strength. Now…” Elrond lapsed into silence.
“May I ask what happened with Celebrian?” came the gentle question.
A profound look of sadness clouded the handsome face, dulled the silver eyes. “The Valar have granted our petition to end our marriage.”
Seeing the distressed look on Erestor’s face, he continued. “I can now see our relationship was sundered beyond repair by the time she sailed, maybe even for longer than that, but I could not face that possibility for a long time after I arrived in the Blessed Lands.”
“To her credit, she was waiting for me when I arrived and greeted me with sincere affection. I was too weak and filled with grief at the loss of Arwen to see that she had made her decision long before I got there.” Turning to look into Erestor’s eyes, he went on, “Celebrian took me home and took care of me until I was strong enough to face the truth. Though, the fact that she had prepared separate rooms for me should have been a clue... though separate rooms were hardly new to us,” he observed in a self mocking tone.
“I even believed for a while her excuse that we needed time to readjust and get to know each other again after being apart for so long. Sleeping alone was not what I had expected nor wanted, but my hopes had already been dismissed before I arrived. She was just biding her time to be polite and proper.” Elrond cringed at the hurt lingering in his voice.
“She has found no healing from her injuries and torments?” Erestor quietly asked.
“Aye, she has. She came to see me before I sailed to tell me she will remarry later this year. I suspect she has long been involved with this new mate, but she was circumspect out of duty and respect.” Frowning, he added, “Form has ever been important to Celebrian.”
Sighing, he continued, “We never made a real bond between us. Once the Valar accepted our petition, there was not much left. Even here, our children were the only thing we truly shared in the years before she was attacked. She had moved into her own rooms as you know and no longer welcomed my visits. I deluded myself that Aman would heal what was broken and we would at last form a real bond. Celeborn was right in the end, though I have no plan to tell him that. We were not right for each other and could never make each other a true life partner. Still our marriage gave me my children and that alone makes it worthwhile for they have been my greatest gift.”
He concluded, “In most ways, I was relieved by the news of her upcoming marriage as it closed the door on our life together and freed us both to move on with our lives. I have been alone and lonely for a long time. If the Valar will it, perhaps that will change.”
Turning his gaze back to the garden, he missed seeing the shadow that drifted over Erestor’s face. The Chief Counsellor has seen his friend’s reaction to his daughter the day before. He had also seen hers.
Remembering his conversation with Celeborn several months earlier, an internal battle began --- over-protective father vs. a trusting friend that recognized in Elrond all that any father could wish as a mate for his beloved daughter. He was not yet ready, however, to put into words what he had seen happen the day before. Is a father ever prepared to easily acknowledge that his best friend and his daughter had fallen deeply in love at first sight?
*****
Legolas stopped to look back at Elrohir. The later had paused in the shadow of the trees near his father’s balcony and appeared to be listening to the conversation of the two elves seated there.
Gliding back to his side without a sound, he asked, “What distresses you, melme?” as he reached to take his lover’s hand.
“I was listening to Ada tell Erestor about the ending of my parent’s marriage. I had not realized how much it hurt him; how sad and wounded it has left him.”
Frowning, the blonde elf said, “You told me he said much of that to you when he discussed the matter with you and Elladan. What did you hear differently now?”
“I heard his sadness. My father is very good at masking such feelings from everyone. I guess it surprised me how truthful he is being with Erestor. I would have hoped he would share his feelings with his sons as we are also grieved for the end of their marriage,” he said.
Moving closer to Elrohir, Legolas cupped the half-elf’s face in his hands and said, “Beloved, in some things you will always be his son first. I doubt Elrond would be able to bring himself to discuss the intimate details of the end of his marriage with you and Elladan because it would feel to him like putting you in the middle or opening the door to their bed chamber. I also doubt he would be comfortable discussing his hurt and anger much less his sexual frustration with his sons.”
Seeing Elrohir flinch at the mention of his father having a sex life, not to mention the fact that it would have included his naneth, Legolas smiled and leaned over for a brief kiss, his lips still swollen from their loving making by the river. “Considering the fact you believe him to have been faithful to your mother before he sailed and his apparent lack of a lover since they ended the marriage, he has been celibate for well over a thousand years. Honorable as his conduct has been, I would image this has been quite a blow to his male pride on top of his frustration.”
Smirking at the look on his lover’s face, he pointed out, “Erestor has been one of his closest friends for many millennia and has suffered his own loss of a wife, though from very different circumstances. Be happy your father has such a friend to confide his problems to and be very glad he spared you hearing these things from him!”
Elrohir grinned at Legolas’s comment, having to agree it would have been embarrassing for all three had his ada ‘shared’ so much with his brother and him. His face quickly sobered as a new thought came to him. “Ada has never had the comfort of a true mate to support and comfort him in his burdens. He deserves more and has lost so many from his life that he held dear. I will pray to the Valar to help him find someone to share his life. I would have him find his life partner as I have with you, Maltaren-nîn.” (my golden Prince)
“As will I, Meleth-nîn. I would also like to see the day soon come when you tell him of our betrothal,” Legolas added, his eyes searching his lover’s for an indication of his readiness to take this step.
“Let him have a little time to settle into Imladris before we tell him. Before the end of the year, I will share I news with Ada, melme. This I promise. I cannot wait to tell the whole of Arda that you love me and have agreed to share my life.”
/I only hope Ada will accept us as he becomes so angry whenever anyone suggests he might have been Gil-Galad’s lover. I wonder…? Nay, he does not sound defensive, so I doubt it. And, he has never shown any interest in bedding a male, but that does not mean he would oppose my loving another ellon. He has never shown any discomfort or prejudice against such unions and has performed the marriage of several ellon couples over the years. Still, I hope he accepts my love for I will never give him up./
*****
Author:
Fandom/Pairing: Elrond/OFC, Glorfindel/Haldir, Elladan/OFC, Elrohir/Legolas, others implied
Rating:.PG13
Warning: AU --- Story set 770 years after ROTK; Some slash but, mostly het
Feedback: This is my first fanfic, so constructive feedback appreciated.
Archive:
Acknowledgements: Many thanks to Alex Cat for her help in betaing this fic.
Disclaimer: Any of the residents of Middle-earth and Aman that you recognize belong to Prof. Tolkien’s estate. The same is true about Middle-earth and Aman. I’m only visiting and admiring the “views”.
Summary: Sauron may be gone, but his legacy of evil still lingers. As Middle-earth faces the threat of another dark lord, a party of elves departs Aman on a mission for the Valar, a mission of mercy long delayed.
Chapter 11 --– Among Friends
“Counsel, conversation, encouragement, consolation, sometimes even criticism
are found at their best among friends.”
Cicero
*****
The two elves sat in companionable silence letting the peace of the morning wash over them. With the ease of old friends, the plate of pastries and fruit was shared and enjoyed. Tea cups were refreshed.
A cool morning breeze drifted across the balcony scented with an earthy mix of the mist off the waterfalls, the fragrance of roses and lavender, and the rich soil of the nearby woods. It was a scent both knew by heart. It was the scent of summer in Imladris. The scent and the quite morning ritual had been sorely missed touchstones of their friendship; ones neither had thought to share again on Middle-earth. For once, both were happy to have been wrong.
*****
Reaching over to see if the pot of tea would stretch to a third cup, Elrond studied his friend through the cover of his unbraided hair. The care lines marking his forehead and the deep grooves near his mouth had not been there at their last meeting. The face of his friend spoke of the pains and burdens he had endured these last 750 years. The timeless beauty of Erestor’s face had aged.
Hating to end the peace of the moment, Elrond took his time and considered how best to ask. Finding no easy way to broach the topic, he began. “How are you, mellon nin? Is there anything I can do to aid or comfort you?”
A small, sad smile ghosted over his face as he turned his head to meet his friend’s eyes. “Your friendship is all the aid or comfort I could ask, Elrond, and I have long known I had that.”
“I am so very sorry I was not here for you when you needed me to be. I know there was little I could have done to have changed what happened, but I would have been at your side.” Pausing he considered his next words before continuing. “I thank the Valar for the gift of your friendship and your counsel these many years. I do not know how I would have endured without your support when Celebrian was attacked, when she sailed. Your friendship offered great comfort and gave me strength. Though it is late in coming, I would offer whatever support I can as I see clearly how deeply you grieve, Gwanur-nîn.” (my brother)
In the manner of two long comfortable with sharing confidences, Erestor nodded his head and said, “Aye, I do, mellon nin. I miss her and the pain has not lessoned nor can it for we do not know what happened to her and her guard. She was the part of my soul I knew was missing and had stopped expecting to fill. Laurea brought passion and joy to my heart; she was my balance and I hers.”
“If it had not been for my daughter, I do not know how I would have found the will to survive. Seere was just a toddler when her mother disappeared. She needed me and I needed her. And now, with her visions…” He stopped speaking abruptly. “I speak out of turn. You will hear of that when you talk with her. Suffice it to say, my hopes have been raised and dashed depending on how I chose to hear them and I am confused. My daughter was deeply grieved knowing what they could do to me. It took Celeborn and me some time to convince her to tell us as she wanted to spare me.”
“But it is all part of a bigger whole and my feelings can not be protected with so much at stake.” Sighing, he added, “I should say no more. Bur you are right. The grief of my wife’s disappearance threatens to overwhelm me once again. I confess I have been waiting without any patience for your insight into her visions hoping we may yet find an answer. Seere needs guidance in understanding her gift sometimes and there are none in Imladris that can help.”
Elrond nodded his head hearing this and asked, “How great is her gift?”
“I would say she will be as powerful as you or Galadriel when she has full command of her gift. Her Maia blood runs true it seems. And, like you, she does not need an object to focus her dreams and visions. They come to her unbidden, mostly in her dreams at this point, but she is developing greater affinity for waking visions of late. Galadriel has tried to counsel her through Celeborn, but secondhand counsel through farspeak lacks the direct interaction she needs to truly understand and hone her gift. I have been hoping you might offer her that.” Erestor, as was his habit, let his tone ask the question of his friend.
“I will gladly aid her all I can, mellon nin. Since Celeborn first told me of your daughter’s gift, but refused to tell me more, I too must confess I have been waiting for the opportunity to talk with her with ill-concealed impatience.” Seeing the grin lighting his friend’s dark eyes, he smiled. “I see that does not surprise you.”
Erestor started to chuckle. “Elrond, for you, patience means events or others accommodating your time and schedule, never the other way around!”
“Aye, I learned from the best. Ereinion had less willingness to wait than any elf I have ever met!” the elf lord smirked.
“Very true. Speaking of Ereinion, has he been rehoused and returned to us?”
Elrond’s face fell. “Nay, I could find no sign nor find any word of his fate. Unless he hides from his family and friends, it seems he has not yet left the Halls of Waiting… or he has elected to go on to Eru, unable to face the pain of his life and death.”
A troubled sigh slipped from the half-elf as he stopped to ponder the fate of his friend. “I looked, Erestor. Seeing him again… being together with Celebrian in Aman... these were my hopes for so long. They gave me comfort and strength. Now…” Elrond lapsed into silence.
“May I ask what happened with Celebrian?” came the gentle question.
A profound look of sadness clouded the handsome face, dulled the silver eyes. “The Valar have granted our petition to end our marriage.”
Seeing the distressed look on Erestor’s face, he continued. “I can now see our relationship was sundered beyond repair by the time she sailed, maybe even for longer than that, but I could not face that possibility for a long time after I arrived in the Blessed Lands.”
“To her credit, she was waiting for me when I arrived and greeted me with sincere affection. I was too weak and filled with grief at the loss of Arwen to see that she had made her decision long before I got there.” Turning to look into Erestor’s eyes, he went on, “Celebrian took me home and took care of me until I was strong enough to face the truth. Though, the fact that she had prepared separate rooms for me should have been a clue... though separate rooms were hardly new to us,” he observed in a self mocking tone.
“I even believed for a while her excuse that we needed time to readjust and get to know each other again after being apart for so long. Sleeping alone was not what I had expected nor wanted, but my hopes had already been dismissed before I arrived. She was just biding her time to be polite and proper.” Elrond cringed at the hurt lingering in his voice.
“She has found no healing from her injuries and torments?” Erestor quietly asked.
“Aye, she has. She came to see me before I sailed to tell me she will remarry later this year. I suspect she has long been involved with this new mate, but she was circumspect out of duty and respect.” Frowning, he added, “Form has ever been important to Celebrian.”
Sighing, he continued, “We never made a real bond between us. Once the Valar accepted our petition, there was not much left. Even here, our children were the only thing we truly shared in the years before she was attacked. She had moved into her own rooms as you know and no longer welcomed my visits. I deluded myself that Aman would heal what was broken and we would at last form a real bond. Celeborn was right in the end, though I have no plan to tell him that. We were not right for each other and could never make each other a true life partner. Still our marriage gave me my children and that alone makes it worthwhile for they have been my greatest gift.”
He concluded, “In most ways, I was relieved by the news of her upcoming marriage as it closed the door on our life together and freed us both to move on with our lives. I have been alone and lonely for a long time. If the Valar will it, perhaps that will change.”
Turning his gaze back to the garden, he missed seeing the shadow that drifted over Erestor’s face. The Chief Counsellor has seen his friend’s reaction to his daughter the day before. He had also seen hers.
Remembering his conversation with Celeborn several months earlier, an internal battle began --- over-protective father vs. a trusting friend that recognized in Elrond all that any father could wish as a mate for his beloved daughter. He was not yet ready, however, to put into words what he had seen happen the day before. Is a father ever prepared to easily acknowledge that his best friend and his daughter had fallen deeply in love at first sight?
*****
Legolas stopped to look back at Elrohir. The later had paused in the shadow of the trees near his father’s balcony and appeared to be listening to the conversation of the two elves seated there.
Gliding back to his side without a sound, he asked, “What distresses you, melme?” as he reached to take his lover’s hand.
“I was listening to Ada tell Erestor about the ending of my parent’s marriage. I had not realized how much it hurt him; how sad and wounded it has left him.”
Frowning, the blonde elf said, “You told me he said much of that to you when he discussed the matter with you and Elladan. What did you hear differently now?”
“I heard his sadness. My father is very good at masking such feelings from everyone. I guess it surprised me how truthful he is being with Erestor. I would have hoped he would share his feelings with his sons as we are also grieved for the end of their marriage,” he said.
Moving closer to Elrohir, Legolas cupped the half-elf’s face in his hands and said, “Beloved, in some things you will always be his son first. I doubt Elrond would be able to bring himself to discuss the intimate details of the end of his marriage with you and Elladan because it would feel to him like putting you in the middle or opening the door to their bed chamber. I also doubt he would be comfortable discussing his hurt and anger much less his sexual frustration with his sons.”
Seeing Elrohir flinch at the mention of his father having a sex life, not to mention the fact that it would have included his naneth, Legolas smiled and leaned over for a brief kiss, his lips still swollen from their loving making by the river. “Considering the fact you believe him to have been faithful to your mother before he sailed and his apparent lack of a lover since they ended the marriage, he has been celibate for well over a thousand years. Honorable as his conduct has been, I would image this has been quite a blow to his male pride on top of his frustration.”
Smirking at the look on his lover’s face, he pointed out, “Erestor has been one of his closest friends for many millennia and has suffered his own loss of a wife, though from very different circumstances. Be happy your father has such a friend to confide his problems to and be very glad he spared you hearing these things from him!”
Elrohir grinned at Legolas’s comment, having to agree it would have been embarrassing for all three had his ada ‘shared’ so much with his brother and him. His face quickly sobered as a new thought came to him. “Ada has never had the comfort of a true mate to support and comfort him in his burdens. He deserves more and has lost so many from his life that he held dear. I will pray to the Valar to help him find someone to share his life. I would have him find his life partner as I have with you, Maltaren-nîn.” (my golden Prince)
“As will I, Meleth-nîn. I would also like to see the day soon come when you tell him of our betrothal,” Legolas added, his eyes searching his lover’s for an indication of his readiness to take this step.
“Let him have a little time to settle into Imladris before we tell him. Before the end of the year, I will share I news with Ada, melme. This I promise. I cannot wait to tell the whole of Arda that you love me and have agreed to share my life.”
/I only hope Ada will accept us as he becomes so angry whenever anyone suggests he might have been Gil-Galad’s lover. I wonder…? Nay, he does not sound defensive, so I doubt it. And, he has never shown any interest in bedding a male, but that does not mean he would oppose my loving another ellon. He has never shown any discomfort or prejudice against such unions and has performed the marriage of several ellon couples over the years. Still, I hope he accepts my love for I will never give him up./
*****