Underneath it all

UIA 11- the letters

The day had gone fast. Too fast for my taste, and when dusk approached, Elrohir had gathered his cloak. "Well…" he said and bit his lip; "I guess I will see you tomorrow."

"Yes of course you will." I said and smiled. I was sad that he had to leave, but I missed Haldir too. My mind crossed the thought of them both in bed curling up to me, and a chuckle escaped.

"Meet me at the pond then tomorrow afternoon," he said. "I would love to take you to my bed, but…" he closed his cloak and pulled up the hood, leaving his face in darkness, "I fear that Haldir would not like it, and I share chambers with Elladan. So, ehm..." he trailed off.

"I understand," I said and smiled "Tomorrow afternoon by the pond, I will wait for you there."

He stepped up to me and wraphis his arms around me. "Have you thought about Celeborn's question?"

"About the birth?" I asked and rested my head on his shoulder. "No I have not, but I promise I will have an answer for you tomorrow." I closed my eyes. Why did I say something so stupid? Now I would have to come up with an answer for him.

He kissed my cheek. "You might want to change the bed linen," he giggled.

I smiled and felt him let go of me. "I will my love, see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," he repeated before he walked out the door.

I felt ever so abandoned when he left, and in lack of other things to do I started to rip off the linen from the bed. It had Elrohir's scent on it and reminded me most of all of water lilies.

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I was sitting in a comfortable chair trying to read, but my gaze kept wandering off into the storm. Where could Haldir be? Was he unharmed? What about the birth? Should he go to Rivendell? What about Elladan? The questions mounted up in my head until I had to massage my temples.

I almost jumped up from the chair when a cloaked elf entered the door. He stepped further in, followed by two more. "You are all safe!" I exclaimed and stood up.

Haldir pushed back the hood, "Of course you silly child." He laughed, "'tis but a thunder storm."

"But it has lasted for so long," I reasoned and offered to take Haldir's wet cloak.

"Would you be a dear and fetch some towels?" The silverhaired elf said and hung his cloak.

"I will build a fire," Orophin said and removed his wet boots.

"And I will put over some hot water," Rumil offered.

And suddenly the whole talan was buzzing with activity. Haldir sat down and looked at me, "You look absolutely radiant my sweet, what happened?"

I felt myself blush and then Rumil, the ever tactful, chuckled and sat down next to me. "I think the younger prince of Rivendell happened." At these words I blushed even more, and Rumil cheered out in victory. "I knew it! I told you so Orophin, I was right!"

Orophin smiled and came to sit with them. "So what is he like?" He asked as he offered me a cup.

I looked nervously over at Haldir, but he seemed to be listening just as intently as his brothers. "Uhm…he is gentle," I said and fingered my tunic sleeve.

Rumil was moving around, apparently not satisfied with my answer. "Is he a good lover?" He asked, and as always, received a slap in the back of his head by Orophin. "Rumil, your manners!" he hissed. "What?" Rumil whined, "That is what we all want to know, isn't it?"

With all three elves gazing upon me I had to confess, "Aye he is."

"Good!" Rumil said and padded my shoulder before wandering off to lie in front of the fireplace. Orophin just shook his head and joined his brother. Now I sat there alone with Haldir looking upon me.

"You look happy," he said and smiled.

"I am," I said and smiled back.

Haldir looked like he suddenly remembered something. "Oh I nearly forgot! We met the messenger, you remember Imbë don't you?"

I nodded and gestured for Haldir to continue.

"Well he gave me this for you," Haldir said and pulled out a scroll from his saddlebag next to his chair.

"My letters?" I said and felt tears stinging my eyes. "Someone has written me back."

"Yes your letters," Haldir said and handed them to me, observing me as he did so.

"Oh thank the Valar," I whispered as I opened the seal with trembling hands. There were two letters inside, one from the healer and one from Edwen.

I began to slowly read the one from the healer. He asked me if I were well, and if the life in Lorien became me well. He said that Thranduil had not punished him too bad. He had been made to tend to the horses for some weeks, and deprived from the privileges as one from the court, but still it was water compared to what he had done to me. And then he asked me of all the obligatory questions such as if my pregnancy was going like it should, and who was going to deliver the child and so on. Haldir asked me what the letter said, and I answered him. He offered to paint me, so we could send the healer a picture of my belly, and I happily agreed, well aware that I would properly look like a bellflower or such by the time Haldir had painted the picture.

The other letter was more depressing by far. It was Edwen telling me that my father had been in a terrible mood, and that he even had to sneak this letter through the healer's letter, which my father apparently had allowed. He told me that he had slapped one of the advisors for saying that expelling me was a bad decision, for now he had no heir to the throne, and Thranduil had apparently had a fit raving on about that he needed no heir. The elves were afraid to mention my name, and even those who had been amongst my friends was talking about me as *that one*. .

I felt my tears run over my cheeks, and I bit my lip as I continued to read.

Edwen wrote that he had the keys for my chambers that Thranduil kept locked up, so if I wanted some small artefact from there he could sneak it out for me. The second half of the letter was Telin, who had written on the same parcel. He told me that he had been deprived of food for two days for giving me his bow, and he was no longer allowed to patrol. He was to stay around the royal talan, looking for spider alerts and trespassers. But he did not regret giving it to me and claimed he would do it all over again, thanking over and over that I had thought of him when I wrote my letters. He said that he would pray the Valar to keep both my baby and me healthy.
But then he had added more words later with another pen. There he said that he and Edwen had a discussion about this, and Edwen did not want to tell me, but he thought I had the right to know. He was now adding it, he said, as the messenger to Lorien was waiting next to him. Apparently Thranduil had cried when he had gotten my letter before throwing it into the fire. He then ordered my 'defiled' bed burned as well. Telin had hope that this meant that the king knew he had acted rash and unjust.

I finished reading and looked up seeing Haldir in tears as well. "He b-burned my b-bed," I stammered, handing the letter to Haldir.

"I am so sorr," Haldir smiled and put the letter away before rising from his chair to come to sit next to me, gathering me in a embrace. It did not take long before his brothers joined in.

Orophin whispered something to Rumil, and he nodded before saying, "Then we bid you both a good night. We will go home to get a nights rest."

Haldir nodded and smiled at his brothers, "You deserve it."

They hurried getting out of the door, leaving us alone in the chair in front of the fireplace. "Did you ask Galadriel?" Haldir finally said.

"No, I asked Elrohir to do so, and she told him no," I said and rested my head on Haldir's ch

"She did? Did she give any reason why?" He began to stroke my hair gently.

"She is the lady of light Haldir, she does not have to have a reason," I chided him and chuckled. "But in fact she said that I did not need the mirror, I knew in my heart already."

"Oh," Haldir said. "I wish she would stop speaking in riddles sometimes."

"So do all," I said and yawned. "Haldir, I am tired will you come with me and sleep?"

The marchwarden nodded and gently slipped down from the armrest. He walked over to the bed, removing his tunic. "Did you put fresh linen on just for me?" he said happily.

"Yes," I said, and in a way that was the truth.

I dressed myself in my nightshirt. It felt strangely alien now that I hadn't been wearing it for two days. Haldir yawned and laid down curling up to a little ball. I joined him and curled up with my back to him. After some time I sighed, "Haldir?"

"Yes," he mumbled and turned to his back.

"What is wrong?" I whispered.

"Nothing," he whispered back and yawned once more.

"Then why are you laying with your back to me, you never did that before." I said and turned to my back too.

He turned his head and looked at me. "I just thought that with Elrohir... I was afraid it would be improper of me," he confessed.

"No, you silly elf," I said with a smile and turned my head to look at him, "You will always hold a special part of my heart Haldir, and to tell the truth, even though I have had Elrohir with me, which I am more than eternally grateful for, I have still missed you."

Haldir seemed to relax. He smiled while cuddling up to me. "I missed you too," he whispered as he rested his hand on my belly.

-tbc-

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- This is beated by Steph. hugs to you my internet saviour :)
I want feedback - as always *smiles*


Az.