the trouble with love

Chapter thirty four A mirror’s view

He jumped out of his bed when someone was pounding on his door and screaming his name through it. his assurance to be right there did little to sooth hisitositor.

When he opened the door Valthroman was surprised to see the lady of the Golden Wood. But his surprise grew when she immediately pushed him back in. “Lock the door” she told Elrond who entered after her.

On his way to Thranduil Elrond had bumped into Galadriel and he told her what had transpired in Melpomean’s room. After hearing it she had instantly dragged Elrond along to her room, where she had hurriedly collected a few objects, and then continued to drag him here, whishing more than once she hadn’t left the peace of ‘Lóriën.

She stayed silent as she made the preparations, letting Elrond explain things. “We are sorry for this intrusion, but there are some mysteries we need solved. And you are going to watch with us.” At first Valthroman didn’t understand what Elrond was talking about, but slowly it dawned on him. Elrond continued: “We trust you to keep this a secret.” The soldier nodded his understanding and placed his hand over his chest in promise.

Galadriel was done and ushered them closer. Two heads bowed over the water-surface of the travel-size mirror. Galadriel didn’t need to see the images with her eyes, they would appear in her mind as well.

Slowly the water turned pitch-black, the signal the ‘show’ is about to start. Images flashed before them, quickly changing and following each other in high speed. They saw Valthroman leaving Sealbeth alone, walking away from him. The image then changed to a little Sealbeth, who was full of wounds, hiding behind a chair in fear. They saw how Sealbeth got the wounds; they saw someone beat him. Elrond and Galadriel both recognized him. Once again the first image showed to change into an even worse picture. Sealbeth laying on the floor, blood seeping from his wrists and neck.

Valthroman didn’t understand much, but the last picture put the fear into his heart. He practically ran to the door. But Galadriel’s voice called him back. “You can’t do this on impulse, Valthroman. You will only succeed in pushing him away.” When the soldier looked at Elrond for answers the half-elf extended his hand and gave him the key. “I never understood why Sealbeth never showed his emotions. But now we know.” There was sadness in his voice, but it was all he would say on the matter.

Galadriel and Elrond watched how Valthroman ran away. They shared a look. “If only he would have spoken…” Galadriel’s voice was sad and a hint of guilt could be heard. But Elrond shook his head. “He spoke, but no one heard him. For that I am eternally sorry.”

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When he awoke he felt two arms around him, holding him place. He felt soothed by them as well as protected. He smiled and turned in the embrace. “Adar.” He sat up shocked when the face he saw didn’t belong to his father. His eyes looked at the other elf in anger. But suddenly his face lit up and the anger faded away. “Elladan.” Elladan smiled too. For a moment he had been afraid Elvil had forgotten everything or that Elvil would go back to hating him. “Aye, it is I. What do you remember?” He knew he probably shouldn’t be asking this, but Elladan was too curious. He needed to know. He was wondering if Elvil would remember his past, and what that past would be. And if he remembered, would he have forgotten his time here or not? But it was promising that Elvil remembered Elladan.

Elvil on the other hand didn’t know what to make of things. To him it was like waking up after a long dream and find the dream standing in front of you, staring you in the face. He needed to think, but he didn’t want to be alone.

Elladan could still read his face, for he opened his arms, telling him he would stay right here, holding him for as long as Elvil wished it. The younger elf happily accepted the invitation and laid back down. He wiggled a bit until he was securely wrapped between Elladan’s legs arms, resting his head on the older elf’s chest. He didn’t change his position throughout his thinking. It was long and hard for him to think it all through, and when he reached his decision sleep overtook him. Elladan was still holding him, combing his hair. Elladan felt more and more at peace. He realised he never wanted to stop holding Elvil.

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“Get out!”

Even though he was weak and tired it didn’t show in his voice. Melpomean had finally gotten Sealbeth to calm down and fall asleep when Valthroman had burst into the room. He had searched everywhere for Sealbeth, getting more and more troubled with every passing second. He did not want to be too late.

He sighed relieved when he saw Sealbeth asleep in the secretary’s arms. He hadn’t expected such a hostile attitude, but he did not back away. The image the mirror had shown him was enough for him to face Melpomean’s tongue. Sealbeth had told him enough to know he should fear it. He strode into the room and approached the bed. “He’s coming with me”; he announced, before gently lifting the sleeping Sealbeth into his arms. He knew just how to move the sleeping elf without waking him. He turned and walked out again, cradling his love to his chest, paying little attention to Melpomean’s arguments. “Quiet, or he will waken.” was all he said. Melpomean didn’t have a choice but to let it happen. He hoped things wouldn’t get worse.

Valthroman was able to carry the sleeping Sealbeth to the advisor’s own rooms. Sealbeth didn’t wake and he hadn’t stirred once. The secretary only woke when he felt himself being lowered onto something soft and how his face was gently petted afterwards. In his foggy brain he remembered his break down. He groaned when he realised Elrond had witnessed it.

Expecting Melpomean at his side Sealbeth opened his eyes only to close them again in shock as he saw it wasn’t Melpomean holding him, but Valthroman. He half wished the image to remain and he half hoped it would fade away when he opened his eyes again. He carefully peeked out of one eye, looking through under his lashes. He was still there, sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at Sealbeth with love and affection.

When the Mirkwood elf realised Sealbeth was awake he looked straight at him. “Sealbeth, I…. we need to talk.” He mentally berated himself. He had had a whole speech planned and rehearsed inside his mind, but now nothing would come out.

Sealbeth averted his eyes. “There’s nothing to talk about. You left.” Valthroman reached out his hand to turn the other’s head back, but thought better of it and stopped midair before pulling his hand back. “I love you and you love me. I can’t be without you. You do love me, don’t you?”

Sealbeth sighed annoyed. “Avá carë sin ata!”

“I’m not. I just need proof, I guess.”

Sealbeth was stunned. “Proof? What proof?” Didn’t he proof it enough?

Valthroman nodded and was very serious. “A promise.” Sealbeth squinted his eyes. He would do anything for Valthroman, who continued: “Promise me that you’ll never leave me! Not even when we’re apart.”

Looking deep into his eyes Sealbeth could see how desperate Valthroman needed this. And he found himself forced to say: “I will never ever leave you Val. No matter what! Not even when we’re apart.” The words were easier than he had expected them to be. And liberating too. Now tha had had said the words it felt as if a big, heavy log was lifted from his shoulders. He saw how Valthroman’s face lit up in a large smile.

The warrior leaned in to kiss his lover. “Ni méla te, cuilenya” Sealbeth felt tears gliding down his cheeks when he heard this admission. Especially because it was in Quenya and it must have been difficult for Valthroman to form those words for hardly anyone spoke it in Mirkwood anymore. But he could never say the same words, so he deepened the kiss, pouring his feelings into it.

“Today’s the last of Imladris’ celebrations. Tomorrow I will have to escort the others back to Mirkwood.” Valthroman’s voice was filled with sadness.

Sealbeth forced him to lay on the bed, cuddling in his arms, and said: “That doesn’t matter now. Serat yonin” Val happily obliged his smiling lover.

End chapter thirty four
TBC

Translations:

Avá carë sin ata! means Don’t start that again!
Ni méla te, cuilenya means I love you, my life
Serat yonin means rest with me