Confessions of Longing

Glorfindel followed the path through a small wooded area that opened
upon the River Bruinen. The character of the river was
wont to change, never staying the same, always in flux, at times, calm
and tranquil at others rushing and violent. This ford was a
boundary line for Imladris and thus infused heavily with elemental
energy, the water itself alive and ready to respond if called upon.
It was a natural defense for Rivendell, one that had served its
purpose well in the past and would continue to do so as long as
Vilya was true.

Glorfindel listened for the water's response as he sent forth a
silent greeting and request for bathing, It was not
necessary to do so, but the seneschal had long been aware of the
fickle water energy and had learned to respect its power. The
golden Elf pricked his ears, for the water would speak softly, but
all that returned to him was low keening, The River seemed
ominously silent, a reflective pool, rather than a flowing current.
This was most strange for river had never flowed to a complete
stop since......Glorfindel paused mid thought. The river had not
returned his greeting either. The keening continued, increasing in
volume and intensity as he neared a clearing on the embankment. Hidden
among the trees still, the seneschal stood unmoving,
his eyes catching upon a site that nearly brought him to his knees.

Upon the shoreline lay the finely muscled body of Haldir, his
naked flesh trembling and luminous in the moonlight. Shudders of
despair wracked the prone Elf, as he bared his pain to the
night. Glorfindel pressed himself against the trunk of a nearby beech,
its rhythmic thrumming grounding his thoughts. Haldir was
not even aware of the effect he was having in his surroundings, so
caught up in his grief was he. The river had slowed to but a
ripple and the breeze stood silent, allowing the Elf's pain to reach
out to the stars unimpeded. Even the very trees had bowed their
golden heads in reverence for such a heartfelt emotional release.

Although every fiber of his being want to run to the March Warden's
side and help to bear his pain, the golden Elf knew that
this release was necessary and should be afforded the utmost privacy.
He should leave. But the seneschal could not move,
perhaps his own unspoken pain was somehow drawing him closer to the
Lorien Elf's despair.

Before his conscious mind could halt its course, Glorfindel thoughts
reached out towards the March Warden, easily piercing
the weakened barrier the Lorien Elf had in place at all times. Raw
pain flooded the seneschal's mind causing him to grasp the tree
for support. The pain of loss, the pain of love, the pain of
vengeance, all these emotions swirling about seeking release. The
seneschal reached out again, this time making his presence known,
curling his essence around Haldir, trying to comfort from a
distance. Words formed on Glorfindel lips, spoken softy, but directly
to the Lorien Elf's' mind.

" Let it go, lirimaer(lovely one), rel it it and be free."


Haldir's quiet sobbing ceased momentarily as the soft whispers of
Glorfindel's words stroked the suffering numbness of his mind, peeked
beneath the heavy cloak of his aching heart.

With much effort, he rolled onto his side, propping himself up on one
elbow, blinking through the hazy mask of grief. Before him stood the
golden Lord, clothed only in breeches, hair billowing in an ethereal
curtain around his noble visage. He seemed to absorb the moon's
radiance with every step and transform it into an aura of ochroid
brilliance as he reached a graceful hand towards the weeping
Galadhrim.

"Glorfindel?" Haldir asked uncertainly, for surely the vision before
him was a product of his imagination and not of this realm.

Glorfindel approached Haldir with care, he did not want to take the
Galadrhim by surprise, but he felt compelled to offer comfort. The
March Warden had turned his still unfocused dark blue eyes to meet
the seneschal's own , confusion mixing with the grief that still bode
heavy across his fair features.

Glorfindel kneeled in the sand and reached forward to push away the
flaxen hair that clung to Haldir's damp cheek.. "Yes Haldir "'tis
I....your grief has called to me and I am here."

Against his nature, Haldir flung his arms around Glorfindel and buried
his face in the soft strands of his iridescent hair.

"I am so. . . grateful for your presence on this eve, Herumin,"
Haldir mumbled into the long mane. "So very grateful."

He breathed in the comforting scent of the seneschal's warm body and
clung to him like an elfling in need of consolation.

Glorfindel did not expect such a reaction from the proud Galadhrim ,
his actions speaking volumes of the depth of his pain. Without
hesitation , the seneschal pulled the still trembling body of the
March Warden tightly to his own, cradling the Elf within his arms and
stoking his hair with gentle hands.

Glorfindel was shocked at the coolness of Haldir's skin, as if the
fire within him was quenched by the tears that flowed down his cheeks.
Glorfindel tightened his embrace sliding his hand to the small of
the March Warden's back.

Pressing his warmth in to the chill flesh. " Let it go, meleth , for
you do not have to bear it alone."

Haldir held himself against the seneschal and laughed bitterly. "How
do you endure it, mellon? Seeing me sob time after time as if I am a
weak-willed She-Elf. Certainly you have better ways to spend your
time than coddling the old wounds of a foolish March Warden."

" On the contrary March Warden" began the seneschal, his breath
stirring the silvered hair against his cheek. " It takes a warrior's
heart to release such pain, to admit hurt and weakness. I find no
weakness of will, just strength of spirit." Glorfindel traced the
curve of Haldir's spine with his fingertips. " I endure nothing,
except perhaps the comfort of you in my arms."

Haldir wound his hands through the golden tresses, hugging the
seneschal fiercely.

"Never have I met one with such purity of heart," Haldir confessed
genuinely, bringing his gaze at last to the other elf. "I am honored
to share your embrace."

He traced a finger along the finely chiseled jaw line, admiring the
splendid elegance of the seneschal, drinking it in with his dark eyes,
savoring the valor and compassion that seemed to emanate from within
his cerulean eyes.

Such magnificent beauty Glorfindel held within him!

As Haldir turned to face him Glorfindel seemed to lose himself in
tepid blue pools of the March Warden eyes. No longer did Glorfindel
see the haughty, arrogant Galadhrim, that bristled and sneered at
every command, but a warm, desirable soul in need of comfort and love.


He pushed down the urge to lower this ethereal creature to the soft
sand and ravage him with all of the passion he had built up over the
last centuries, choosing only to press his lips softly to the March
Warden's mouth in a soft kiss.

Haldir cupped Glorfindel's face with his hands gently and returned the
passion deeply, the salt of his tears mingling with the warmth of
Glorfindel's full, pliant mouth.

"Oh, meleth," he whispered tremulously, "forgive me for the shameful
indignation I forced upon you in the baths that fateful day, for never
have I experienced such a stirring within me as I feel at the very
moment and I must redeem you properly, for never did you deserve the
harshness of my hands upon your fair body in such a disgraceful
manner."

Glorfindel smoothed the back of his hand along the curve of Haldir's
jaw trailing his thumb over the swell of the March Warden' s parted
lips. Tipping the Elf's chin , he looked deep into the others
troubled eyes. " There is nothing to forgive Haldir, for it was not
your heart that swayed your hand but a darkness, bound on tearing
apart our very souls. I hold nothing against you meleth..."

Glorfindel paused. " I too bore you ill and for that I am ashamed. Let
it be behind us meleth-nin."

Haldir kissed Glorfindel once upon the cheek and then twice upon his
soft lips before placing his forehead against that of the other elf
and laying his hands upon the naked shoulders.

Within the depths of his mind, he slowly began an incantation of
mental healing in Elvish, feeling his hands grow warm with the words
that filtered through his mind and flowed into that of the seneschal.
Images of the heart of Llothlorien's most sacred of gardens meshed
with the beauty of the nature that surrounded them as Haldir opened
his mind to Glorfindel, seeking gently to walk within the corridors of
memory and share the most intimate of secrets that could not be
spoken.

The image of himself, naked an wounded, holding Feraphine materialized
and he allowed the other to share his grief, seeking only openness of
spirit in return. Haldir suddenly stood before himself, looking down
upon the scene before him, dressed in regal battle regalia, red cape
billowing proudly behind him as he invited Glorfindel to stand beside
him.

"Behold that which has never been seen by the eyes of another," the
Haldir Within said, his hand sweeping the scene before him. "This, I
share with you and you alone."

He turned to Glorfindel, hand outstretched. "Allow me to help heal
those past hurts that you fear to speak of, for that which you have
given me I can never repay with physical acts alone."

Glorfindel relaxed and let the waterfall of Haldir's memories wash
over him, leading him through the lush forests of Llothlorien, its
warm golden glow basking them in dappled sunlight, and taking him
deeper to source of the March Warden's pain. So intimate was this
exchange that the seneschal felt himself swoon slightly, grasping
Haldir's shoulders in support.

The image of the naked March Warden cradling his lost love imprinted
itself upon Glorfindel mind. This exchange wfar far deeper than any
physical touch and the seneschal was awestruck at Haldir's willingness
to share his pain.

Glorfindel leaned forward and sealed his lips over Haldir's , kissing
him deeply, the ancient elf needing far less concentration to allow
his mind to open. The seneschal took the March Warden to the gates of
Mandos, a memory that when shared would no doubt cause the March
Warden some reflection.

Taking him by the hand, Glorfindel led Haldir into the marbeled halls,
and past the gathered throng of those waiting to be judged to stand
with him . Placing kiss upon his lips the halls dissolved leaving them
to stand upon a beach head in front of a grave, covered in yellow
flowers.

"Here I lay, Haldir, awaiting my judgement again, and I show you this,
my deepest pain, for across these waters lay the Havens Grey, a land I
may never see, but remain upon this far shore forever."

The seneschal allowed Haldir to see the tears that flowed down his
cheeks, and let him feel the anguish of never seeing his people again.
With a shuddering breath, Glorfindel broke the exchange , laying the
March Warden gently down into the soft sand. "Meleth, you honor
me...." His words were soft and quiet.

"Oooh," Haldir breathed, his mind reeling from the images. "Oooh,
meleth nin.....oooh...." he pulled the ancient elf against him, not
fully understanding the pictures in his mind, but unable to ask for
clarification.

He stroked the pale, golden beauty before him, kissed the trembling
lips with the utmost of reverence.

"Aa' meleth lle, Glorfindel? " (May I love you?) he breathed softly,
nuzzling the supple flesh of the other's neck.

Glorfindel let all his cares fall away as he lay embraced against
Haldir's willing body,. The March Warden 's request sent shivers down
his spine, and a warm heat to spiral through groin. Huskily he
breathed his reply. " Amin naa lle Haldir, meleth-nin, Amin naa'
lle......" (I am yours, my love)

Haldir slid his hands over the sleekness of the other elf's body and
rolled him gently onto his back, unlacing his breeches and tugging the
supple leather from the seneschal's slender hips, kissing his way down
the taut stomach. He caressed the soft flesh of Glorfindel's inner
thighs, licking and nibbling, before slipping the seneschal into his
mouth for the most intimate of kisses, savoring the swollen throb of
the heated arousal, his tongue tracing a path down the length of the
shaft and back up again before swirling around the head and sucking
with urgently tender ferocity.


Glorfindel sunk softy into the sand, the March Warden's fervent
caresses causing him to arch his back with pleasure. Soft supple lips
enveloping his hardening arousal, taking his breath away with every
heated pull of the flesh, drawing him closer to the edge , but not
over, not yet.


"You are more beautiful than Elbereth's light, meleth. . .your touch
more sacred than that of the most revered of spirits. I. . .,"
Haldir paused, wanting to speak the words that threatened to spill
forth from his lips, but choosing instead to kiss Glorfindel's lips
once more to stop himself from confessing that which built and
fluttered inside of his chest, his heart hammering against his ribcage
in heated arrhythmia.

Haldir 's lips seeking his , parting softy eagerly allowing the
seneschal to taste of his own desire. Words such beautiful words
tumble from trembling lips, pausing between ragged breaths.

Drawing is leg up and across the March Warden's hip, Glorfindel rolled
the Lorien Elf beneath him silencing him with a crush of his lips.
Raising up on his hands and knees, the seneschal burned a trail of
heated kisses down Haldir's bared chest, a wake of golden hair
followingind.ind.

Glorfindel caught Haldir's dark gaze in his own as he neared the Elf's
growing desire, He wanted to watch the March Warden face as he took
him completely, watch as his tongue circled the Lorien elf 's hardened
shaft, watch as passion mounted in those deep blue eyes.

With moan from deep within his chest Glorfindel took Haldir with
utter pleasure, filling his mouth again and again with the throbbing
source of his desire.

Not without great regret , Glorfindel pulled away gently, and returned
to capture Haldir's lips. Breathing raggedly , seneschal gazed at
Haldir though heavy lidded eyes. "What is your pleasure Heru, would
you be the Hunter or the Hunted?"

Haldir's lips curved into a devious smile. "I do believe I owe you
the pleasure of bliss this time, meleth-nin."

He slid from beneath Glorfindel's embrace and gently laid the elf once
more on his back. He would do this right. . .love the seneschal the
way the ancient elf deserved to be loved, so thoroughly that it would
be forever imprinted with the minds of both. Haldir lifted the
seneschal's legs from the sandy embankment and settled them upon his
shoulders, reaching for the oil that Glorfindel had so thoughtfully
carried to the beach. Palming a generous quality, he began to caress
himself with smooth, languid strokes, moaning as he did so, allowing
Glorfindel to watch him.

"I will be gentle with you, Herumin," Haldir murmured huskily as he
leaned closer to the panting elf.
With the one hand, he roamed over the seneschal's firm buttocks,
sliding his fingers between them and probing gently, slipping one
finger into the tight opening and feeling the heated tightness that
dwelt there.

Glorfindel's lean body shuddered with pleasure as Haldir teased and
fondled him into readiness. Never before had he had taken such care
with another as he eased his weeping hardness into the space where his
hand had been, pulling the elf's body against his own. Gently, he
pushed past the tightness and into the warm vice of the seneschal's
inner self, a shuddering gasp escaping him as he bent over
Glorfindel's arching form, hands sinking deeply into the sand at his
sides.

"Ooooh.....Glorfindel. . ." Haldir moaned, unable to keep from
speaking the Elf's name over and over. "Glorfindel. .
.ooooh...aniron. . .aaaahhh...Glorfindel. . .aaaannniirrrron....."

The silvery tips of his hair dragged lightly over the seneschal's
chest as he penetrated him deeper still, lithe body convulsing in a
short spasm of pleasure's prequel, for the feeling of Glorfindel's
body gloved him in radiant warmth, melded his flesh into a part of
something far greater than he had ever dreamed and Haldir felt tears
of exultation spill from his eyes, splashing onto the pale chest of
the seneschal to mingle with the bits of river silt that clung there,
trailing a path down his ribs and into the sandy embankment.

Every thrust of the March Warden's body sent shockwaves of pleasure
through the seneschal' s tingling flesh, Glorfindel moved his hips in
time with each thrust, meeting every apex with a moan of eventual
surrender. The seneschal's hand moved to caress his own throbbing
need, each long deep stroke racing him closer to his release.

he seneschal firmed his grip and increased the speed and length of his
stroke, his long legs shaking at the intensity of the fire building
within his body. Throwing back his head in ecstacy, he let a growl of
pure pleasure escape.
Nor n'amin Haldir...!.' ( ride with me ...Haldir) Aiye!!!!!
Leithianamin ennas !( my release is near)

With those words echoing in the night, Glorfindel thrust into his
palm, his hot seed pumping from his throbbing member and spilling upon
his belly.

Haldir's breath quickened into a fevered gasp as he drove inside of
the golden Lord, the other's climax sending him spiraling over the
edge of his own blissful release, his body convulsing and shuddering
with such ferocity that he feared he may actually split Glorfindel in
two with the intensity of his desire. He collapsed atop the seneschal
in a panting heap, spent and sated beyond words. Yet words did linger
within his mind and he clung fiercely to them, staying his wanton
tongue, lest it reveal more than he wished to concede.

They lay joined still, their hearts pounding, their lungs laboring,
the aftershocks of their release still rippling thought them.
Glorfindel stroked the March Warden's luminous hair, letting his
overwhelming emotion spill out and over his flushed cheeks. Sensing
Haldir's need, and not trusting the inadequacy of words, the
seneschal opened his mind once more to the Lord of the March, a safe
haven of warmth and total trust. He gave himself over willingly and
without regret.

Into his mind the seneschal spoke words of reassurance and friendship.
"You are safe with me Haldir of Lorien, sleep now within my arms and
let us take comfort in what we have discovered."

Haldir sighed contentedly and snuggled into the seneschal's embrace,
knowing the other shared his unspoken sentiment. Only when he was
certain that the Elf slept, did he lift his head to look upon the
wondrous beauty beside him and from his lips came words so softly that
only the keen ears of nature could have heard them.

"Amin mela lle, Glorfindel. . ."