rate_review Reviews

First, I know Tolkien has probably reached China with all the spinning he is doing - and not just with Fifteen Years, but with the majority of the LOTR stuff on AFF! So, I really have a problem with the canon fanatics - if you don't like this kind of AU, go elsewhere.

And Thranduil being all sweetness and light to his courtesans, while Celeborn is cruel? Oh, please. I'm certain Thranduil plays lots of dark games - but Ertia chose not to dwell on this, for whatever reason. After all, on Legolas' first day with Celeborn, he has to pick BDSM toys from Celeborn's chest. Ertia pointed out that Legolas had often played this game in the Greenwood. Just how do you think Legolas learned the art of BDSM? Legolas is just as insatiable as his father when it comes to sex. Dear ol' dad was likely instrumental in his sexual upbringing, including BDSM. Perhaps even presented him his own toys when he came of age! And we know Legolas was rough with at least 2 Greenwood courtesans, probably more - does Ertia have to detail everything?

Legolas knew what he was getting into when he signed the contract. Now he has to be the submissive, but he certainly didn't seem to mind his first day with Celeborn. Celeborn's size seemed to be Legolas' biggest problem (pardon the pun), not the BDSM activities. Ertia has allowed Legolas to partake in many non-BDSM sex romps in Lorien, but the naysayers haven't mentioned this. Ertia doesn't usually go into great detail on the het sex, or the pleasant M/M sex, but that's her choice!

Ertia - I love Fifteen Years, and was thrilled you were one of the first to come back to AFF. I'd love to see some long het sex scenes, especially threesomes. Maybe Iliene and Celeborn both making it up to Legolas? After all, they promised!

Sorry to refer to you in the 3rd person so much - I just had to give my 2 cents worth (but 2 cents ain't worth much these days....). I went through severe withdrawal last summer when you had to stop posting. I hope the ache in your heart has eased somewhat over time.

Good day, Miss Ertia. I'm afraid I'm not at my best. Haldir and I had quite a night of it and we managed to use up all his stock of dwarvish ale he had left over from the Moria days before the balrog came. We're in the Lady Galadriel's bad books now after getting piss drunk and singing the naughty version of the Lay of Luthien under her talan. But then she had a look at this story in her mirror, and she understands where we were coming from.

Please, no more rewrites. It doesn't get any better. No spankings. I'm not into that. You remind me of the old joke:

Masochist: "Oh hurt me, please!"

Sadist:: "No."

If you want a spanking or any kind of negotiation on your contract, talk to my alter ego in Lorien or his whoremaster, child manipulating father. My Adar and I don't own slaves either.

Nope, I didn't mind the oral a few chapters ago, because I seemed to handle it just fine without gagging and nearly drowning. Not sure why it was that way this time, but I assumed either you or Celeborn were making it rougher than necessary to teach me a lesson about speaking up for myself.

I (or at least my alter ego) never minded the sex -- not even the riding crop and the nipple clamps. I minded the humiliation, which you had me angsting about. If you'd said I enjoyed Celeborn's manly assertiveness in turning me over that bed, or having Haldir sneer at me while I was strapped to that table (Oooh, Haldir!) I'd have wondered about my sanity, but I'd have accepted it as your OC AU view of my personality. Of course, I was blaming myself for having disobeyed Lady Galadriel until you made it clear it was a set up for failure that no male could have resisted. Did you notice my surprise when Iliene spilled the beans?

"Now, would you be so kind as to tell your dear Sarnlass that you ordered him not to climax and then intentionally pressured him to do so.?"

Legolas could not hold back his surprise, and knew it must show on his face."

That's me, realizing my new owners will set traps for me. That one was cute, but I seriously worried that Celeborn might be tricking me later:

""My lord." Legolas gasped, fear shooting through him. There was no right answer. A cleverly laid trap? Was Celeborn so vicious to have laid such? "

Now I'm a little scared, especially after what comes next. I realize I'm in Lorien for the next fifteen years minus three weeks, playing BDSM games without a 'safe word.' I can't exactly go home now, can I?

So, I'm only with Celeborn for the next five years, and then I get to serve the whole court or go to the borders. Will I have to service any Warden or soldier who orders me? I'm really looking forward to that!

King Thranduil's son is the warrior. King Thranduil's son fought the forest fire and came to Iliene's defense, however misguided. The passive, subservient Sarnlass waits for permission before taking action. I was slapped for not being Sarnlass. Sarnlass will not be much use in a battle, and neither will Prince Legolas if he loses sight of who he really is.

Please don't call me a Mirkwood git, for you seem to know little about braiding techniques. You described me as:
"Longingly, he twisted it into a single braid and stood looking in the mirror."

'Twisted' into a single braid down my back. Not 'plaited' as with a three strand braid. One 'twists' hair into a rope braid (two strands, twist counterclockwise, left over right, repeat) which comes undone immediately. Since I don't have any hair ties -- as a wearer of the collar, I'd need them about as much as an ellon needs a straight razor -- the minute I stopped staring at myself sadly in the mirror and let go of it and lay down to sleep, it was unraveling. By the time Iliene came in, it was gone. That's what would happen the way you described it, anyway.

I do have an eye for fine detail, Miss, and I didn't think you suggested I'd be stupid enough to risk more punishment after what had happened the previous evening. Or maybe you did, but you did not explain it well. The fact that I needed the self comfort was very telling, though. I'm wondering why this is forbidden the courtesans even in the privacy of their own bedrooms. To remind them of their complete lack of status at all times?

Defiance, huh? Maybe that's why I can 'get it up' metaphorically speaking the next morning and go out to fight.

Oh, and when Haldir shows up, am I supposed to follow orders and get away from him, or can I hang onto Orophin until Haldir gets to his side? That's the problem with orders -- you sometimes have to ignore them in certain situations. A prince knows that, but a slave might get a little confused.

To the next young lady, honey, I love AU. Thanks to the professor, it's the only kind of fiction where I can get any sex. But I don't like AU that makes me and the other elves so OC as to be unrecognisable to our own naneths.

Er, I'm all too familiar with the stories where Ada was instrumental in my sexual upbringing. No thank you! About the dark games -- you're assuming facts not in evidence. Authors show, not tell, and Ertia showed him being gentle with Mirie and Ferdal. Anything else, and she should have showed it, not just assumed it or conveniently remembered it 20 chapters in.

Hell yes, my alter ego was into "tie me up and paddle me,' but he and Eferell took turns and it was consensual. I imagine there was some sodomy too. No problem with either of those things in Lorien. It's just when it starts getting rough and nasty that it isn't fun to read about.

Legolas Thranduilion 'rough' with women? My alter ego remembers being selfish and that's all, so let's not start a rumor. Young males can, ah, have little woopsies that make them finish before their partners, and I'm sure Mirie and Ninsewel were well trained enough to act like it was perfectly fine. Blame the system, not the elf. Celeborn seems to be having the same problem, only he's old enough to know better.

If he was rough, then Mandos take him. I'd have no sympathy for anything that happened to him from then on. Show us, Ertia, and we won't care about Sarnlass anymore.

But I'd rather Mandos take the writers of stories that take it so OC that they're using the names, the faces and the locations with no other resemblance to the fandom.

But hey, if my alter ego likes what's happening to him and he's getting off on it, then go to it! I'm getting the picture now.

Pardon me while I go nurse my hangover. Haldir is grousing and insisting he'd never buy flimsy furniture, and Celeborn is still locked in his talan. Only now, he's insisting he's been put off sex for good, and Galadriel doesn't look happy about that.

I wasn't going to show up again, but calling me a git who's rough with women just made me lose it. What movies have you been watching?

OMG! Poor Orophin. Was he just trying to play diplomat with the filthy men? I hope Legolas and Haldir manage to kill a lot of them. More story soon please.

Ada was hitting the Dorwinion pretty heavily last night, and I asked him what was eating at him so badly. It took three more flagons before he fessed up and gave me this link.

Sweet Iluvatar's Holy Light! What have I ever done to you that you should enjoy watching me suffer? (I'm relying here on Miss Gabby's statement that: "Don?t think for a minute Ertia or ANY author isn?t fully aware of what she is doing and the psychological implications of her character?s acts.") That is, what have I done besides being inordinately fair of face even for an elf, and having been played on screen by an actor handsome enough to inspire 1001 erotic fantasies? I wouldn't mind, but why do 999 of those erotic fantasies have to involve my rectum?

By my own count, it's no more than three weeks into my fifteen year stay in Lothlorien, and already Celeborn is leaving bruises and having to be reminded to use lube. I fear for the future, I truly do. The only lesson I've learned is that no good deed goes unpunished.

Oh, I see you've been so kind as to write an alternate version of that scene, in which Celeborn most generously allows me to blow him instead of taking me rough:

". Legolas had to draw back quickly, wrapping his hand around the base of the Lord's erection to keep from gagging.
With chagrin, he thought to himself that perhaps it would have been easier to allow himself to be taken as he retrained his focus on his task."

Oh great! Now I get to choke on a big dick. I guess you've taught me not to protest my treatment. The point was, the mighty lord Celeborn couldn't be bothered to take the time to use oil and a few fingers with his little toy. I'll ask you, Mistress Ertia -- would I have been allowed to say 'no, not this afternoon' period? I think that part about me managing a small smile despite my pounding heart indicates I knew 'no' wasn't an option. I probably would have been better off bending over and taking it -- at least I could have been lying down. On the bright side, it seems to have spared me an extra set of bruises on my thighs.

Would you mind writing the scene back in Mirkwood where I treated Mirie or Ninsewel that way -- without Ada having my ears in a jar on his desk for abusing the help? No, it was "Good morning, Mirie, thank you for the 'head,' which was your idea, Mirie, is there anything I can do for you?" Notice how Ada waited for Mirie's signal before taking her on his desk and how he made sure she came before he did. That's what he taught us too, and that's why Ferdal loves him. Too bad the rules are different in Lorien.

I'm sorry I accused your precious Lord Celeborn of almost rape. I don't hold with people who don't say no and then call it rape later. Except in a case like mine and Iliene's where the contract says we have to say yes and smile about it too.

Of course, you've turned me into such a little lapdog that I just loove Lord Celeborn, because he makes me feel sooo special. I especially love how in the new chapter he's sent me out to sneak through the trees in a cream linen tunic with my hair blowing free to get in my eyes and catch in my bowstring. Way to get your favorite concubine killed m'lord!

I have a message for my AU alter-ego in Lorien: Dude, grow a spine! Use your knife to pry off that collar, climb out the window, and haul ass out of there. Don't worry about Celeborn -- elf lords who have to be reminded to use lube on their catamites deserve to have their sex toys taken away. He's got a wife, if he needs sex.. A really fine wife. She's a GILF, if you want the truth.

And if Celeborn expects you to help him fight his war, he's got some nerve. He can't smack the warrior out of you one night and expect you to find that warrior the next morning. You can't turn it on and off like a light switch. You don't owe anything to a realm where you were treated like the lowest of the low. How grateful was he to you for fighting that orchard fire half naked? Not very! He had you chained to a table and eating peaches from that same orchard off you not ten days later. You weren't in on their little game, and they might have skipped it this time around, considering.

Don't worry about that evil wight back in Mirkwood who claims to be your father. He made it plain you're expendable. He's got plenty more heirs where you came from to help him fight off the spiders and the orcs. (That's okay, Ada, I know it really isn't you.)

Steal a horse, ride straight to Mithlond, and get yourself on a boat to Valinor. Of course, that means you won't be around to watch Aragorn's back when the Ring Quest rolls around, but tough sh*t for Middle-earth. Those elves deserve to go down, and the Edain aren't much better. Too bad about the Hobbits, though.

The way Ertia has set it up, running for it makes you an oath-breaker, but don't worry about that either. Manwe Sulimo will release you from that oath. In fact, when he finds out that the elves of the three realms are keeping sex slaves, he's probably going to march in and put that area 100 feet below sea level the way he did with Beleriand. We haven't had that kind of thing since Thangorodrim, and it was Melkor doing it.

See what happens, Mistress Ertia, when you make people suffer for their noble impulses? Every AU has its consequences.

Or else, Bro, you can stay, hunker down, and learn the attitude of cringing servility they seem to want from you. You're doing it for Ferdal, remember? He wouldn't have lasted long, what with Celeborn leaving bruises and taking him rough every time ruling Lorien got a little stressful. I'm not sure what use you're going to be to anyone by the time fifteen years is up, or how you're going to be able to go home and look your father in the eye. But since Miss Ertia broke you, maybe she can fix you.

Take my advice though, and never get within 100 miles of Lothlorien ever again. I can't see you accepting a pretty bow from them with a look of joy on your face. I'd be sticking that bow where Anor doesn't shine -- somewhere involving Celeborn.

Gotta go. I promised I'd get Ada some aspirin, and then I'm having a beer with Haldir. It's been a tough week for him, what with his boss locking himself in his talan and refusing to come out. After Miss Gabby stole his miruvor, all they've been able to hear is him moaning about how he's never going to eat peaches again. But Ada says Cousin Celeborn was always the sensitive type.

Your Uncooperative Servant,

Legolas (Nobody's Catamite) Thranduilion, Prince of Mirkwood

PS To Crowdaughter and justso, thank you for the words of support. Without them, this rant would have been worse. Much worse.

Please forgive this addendum, but Ada has just reminded me of my manners.

I would like to extend my best wishes and hopes for a speedy recovery to Master Orophin, who has never done anything to harm me in any way. I rather like his brother Rumil, and I am sure that I will come to like and respect Marchwarden Haldir once we get to know each other and have had the opportunity to settle our differences like adult elves.

I owe him an apology for my hasty misjudgement of Iliene's accident, although we all seem to have been skillfully misled.

Your Obedient Servant,

Legolas (Still Nobody's Catamite) Thranduilion

Prince Legolas,

How good of you to drop by!
I was actually wondering how long it would take for your father to tattle on me. I take it I'm in for a spanking?

The alternate scene that I posted to my personal website is one of about a dozen different scenarios that I spent my weekend re-visiting, re-writing, and struggling over. I interviewed Lord Celeborn and you, yourself, about them, in attempts to understand better where I may be losing sight of the story-line. If you are truly interested, I might be convinced to send them to you in exchange for, oh say, a three year reduction to my current contract?

Because, frankly, to quote a certain Goblin King I know, I am exhausted from living up to your expectations of me. If I attempt one more rewrite or second-guess over that scene, I'm likely to fade entirely!

I must note that you didn't seem particularly disturbed by oral sex a few chapters back. Nor by the varieties of sex you've enjoyed since coming to Lothlorien. You may complain however you like about honey and peaches, but if you try to tell me you didn't enjoy being licked clean by Celeborn's skilled mouth, then you are deluding yourself. Overall, I think you are handling yourself admirably for one so new to the Courtesanship. Remember, you are only contracted exclusively to Celeborn for the first five years, which is common ritual for the exchange, and then you will have greater freedom and more autonomy. Things are difficult right now, but rarely does Lothlorien face such trials, and things do improve.

This constant reference to the slap across the face as "smacking the warrior out of you" is tripe and based on preferences that have little place in this story. Are you telling me that a Prince of Mirkwood can't take a little slap across the face for disobeying a direct order? Would you rather a manly slap across the face and sent to your quarters, or turned over Celeborn's knee, spanked like a baby, and given a time-out in the corner? I very specifically enforced Celeborn's having you rise and face him as an equal, rather than keep you on your knees in disgrace. Really, I think you are more than strong enough to handle what you are going through.

Now, something has been irking me. I was going to try to say this politely, but I can't. LOOK, you foolish Mirkwood git, YOUR HAIR IS BRAIDED! You braided it yourself in your room after Celeborn sent you there. You braided your hair in an act of comfort and defiance and fell asleep. Iliene woke you, and you were disturbed by Celeborn with news of the war. You dressed hastily and went for your weapons. Your hair is still braided. Everyone has been to busy to notice, except perhaps Seldayan, and I'm sure he finds it an amusing foible of a young new Courtesan. And believe me, you are going to bless the Valar for those cream-colored linens before the end of the next chapter.

You will learn that in my longer stories, details are everything. If I included it, it's there for a purpose. It's highly unlike you to not pay attention to fine detail, and I confess I find myself disappointed. Perhaps I'll have to see about putting the details in bold print? Or italicizing them?

As for suggesting that you would refuse to fight for Lothlorien, I thought I knew you better than that! Leave an Elven realm to fall to the destruction of Men? If nothing else, what of Rumil? Would you truly abandon the fight knowing one you call friend may be in mortal peril? I do not believe that of you, however fed up you may be with Lord Celeborn's recent lack of consideration.

Thank you for your concern for Orophin. He has had a rough time of it, and I fear greatly for him, as well for the fate of his brother. They need you, Legolas. Please do not abandon them now in their time of need.

Ever Your Lost Love Slave,
Ertia

Hey Ertia!

I don't normally review much, but this discussion did have the power to draw me in, as I had been having much the same concerns as 'Thranduil Oropherion'. Particularly passing rape off as a light matter outside the darkfic. I don't feel you have crossed the line, at least not for me, though there are many issues that raise my hackles, the treatment of Legolas by his "superiors" in particular. I have begun to think that Mirie was either unbelieveably cruel or wanting to pay back Legolas/Thranduil for something the readers know nothing about. It is obvious that Legolas did not expect to be treated in this degrading way. He seems rather selfless character, if a bit thoughtless due to his youth, not one to intentionally harm anyone.
'Crowdaughter' expressed my thoughts better than I could have myself, but just a few more words. There might be a reason why Legolas thinks he deserves being treated like dirt, but I do not see any justifiable reason for Celeborn to exhibit this "kick the dog" syndrome. Taking out your frustrations on someone unable to fight back indicates weak personality and lack of control. The same could be said about Haldir. It looks like they are the ones in need of character development.

I wish you would hurry up and post more so we can reach the happy end, look back to entire fic and see the reason why everything had to happen the way it did. We lack sufficient information at the moment. I fully understand why 'Thranduil Oropherion' kept reading even with all the concerns listed - you hope to see an explanation and a turn for the better.

PS. There was a fic in another archive I had to stop reading when I had cried my eyes out in symphaty for the main character and then noticed that author had listed humour alongside with angst in warnings. It was an engrossing story of date rape with aggravating circumstances (i.e. being raped by your best friend) and author seemed to think the main character should only worry about whether he is gay or not. The fic was heading towards the main character going back for more of the same, falling in love with his abuser and all. I could see this happening, but not as a humorous tale. It was rather well written except for this aspect. So, mixing humour and darkfic elements is a risky business. I was not so much galled by the happenings in the story as by the author's attitude to what is happening.

Once more, best luck and post more soon!

Ertia,

Please don't spend your time and effort answering this person point for point, who obviously will *never* be happy with your fic. Instead channel your efforts into writing another wickedly wonderful chapter for us, with all these characters you have splendidly crafted and created, and please keep them untarnished and unchanged by this person's disapproval. Think of all the readers who normally read and then fire off one or two lines to you asking for "More" and "Quickly". These are your audience, not this sanctimonious malcontent.

This fandon is jammed packed with people who have issues with the kinds of sexual and power situations authors put their characters into, and/or who object to any diversion at all from Tolkein cannon. Yet like a horrifying train wreck, these people can't seem to turn away. They pruriently watch and read as long as they can stand (often months or even years), and then when finally they feel they have sullied themselves to the point of self-disgust, they fire off letters and reviews blaming the author for insidiously corrupting the innocents; exactly as our 'Mirkwood King' has done above. Yet this particular person takes it one step further by implying that you too are a victim of your own craft. "I find the fact that you and your positive reviewers seem unaware of the casual cruelty being expressed in this story, and that you find the spectacle of an elf's spirit being slowly broken to be erotic, to be the most chilling of all." HA!!! I guess those are the dangers we all face when we unsuspectingly wade into the swamp of online pornography.

"By the way, I very much enjoyed "Lessons." Everyone in that story had a good time and no one was hurt or humiliated. That is why I gave this one a try, to my everlasting grief." So I ask, oh Mirkwood King, why not spare yourself further grief and read elsewhere? Why didn't you stop reading after Glorfindel 'broke' Legolas in the forest? Don't tell me it was because the lack of warnings lured you into believing this story was going to be nothing but sweetness and light!? You were enjoying the fic. Sure you can say the light, frivolous and innocent parts lured you along, but then the disturbing darkfic elements started creeping in. Many of us would say that is simply good writing. Ertia is amazing at being able to weave the two so artfully together. (Side note to Thranduil Oropherion; your patronizing remark to go read up on the Stockholm Syndrome was pathetic. Don’t think for a minute Ertia or ANY author isn’t fully aware of what she is doing and the psychological implications of her character’s acts.)

Ertia, there is hope!! Our Mirkwood King writes; “I am quite familiar with the early chapters of this story, and the reviews of them. I noted that after two early protests the critics gave up and went away.” Hummmmmm…

This is all I will write on this matter here, for this board should be for left for reviews of Ertia’s story, and I am instead making the offense of reviewing the review.

Gabby

Hi, again!
Reading this whole discussion with your 'Thranduil Oropherion' reviewer kindled some questions in me, so I take the luxury to give another review.
Thinking about Haldir's attitude towards Sarnlass and the male courtesan given to himself had me puzzled. Come to think of it: Why *is* haughty Haldir such an ass about the male courtesans? Given the rules of courtesanship, as you describe them in earlier chapters, he should know that the committment to the collar is only temporary and the elves he is scorning and looking down at will most likely sometimes be free again, rid of the collar, and then not very likely to be favorable or thinking very well of him. Also, the very fact that he thinks of himself above their station - or of Sarnlass acting above *his* station towards him when the courtesan wasn't humble and submissive enough for his liking - seems to be a disturbing irritation of perspective to me. If the courtesanship is a willing path chosen by consent of the ones who submit to it, and reversible, there should be no base for Haldir thinking himself better than any of the elves temporarily in that situation. ven more, Haldir seems to be taking out his problems with the former courtesan of Celeborn on another one from Rivendell who had absolutely notghing to do with what happened to him before. So, Haldir's attitude seems to imply that the courtesanship is indeed *more* than some kind of pact to willingly offer sexual service to anybody in need for a time, but something atht indeed besmirches the Elves submitting to the collar or good. I'm astonished then, that he is not warned off this attitude by anyone, but encouraged in doing so by Celeborn. This is puzzling to me, even more so because Celeborn's attitude towards Sarnlass shows that being a courtesan does not necessarily mean to shed all warrior skills or give up on other duties for the community, so there should be no reason to despise anyone taking the collar, especially not stating that 'all the courtesans are unthrustworty', like Haldir does. Or does his attitude resembles the one many human men take toward prostitutes? Taken advantage of them and buying their services is fine, but the women providing those services are still scum to their mind? But then, why would he treat female courtesans differently?

Will you explain Haldir's attitude in a future chapter? Otherwise, I can only hope that he will be humbled thouroughly by Legolas when Legolas has shed the collar and his 'Sarnlass' persona once and for all, either before Legolas returns to Mirkwood, or afterwards, when he comes back to Lothlorien with the Ringquest. Because I do not think that Haldir's attitude is justified,*whatever* another courtesan some tiimes in the past did to him, and he needs some severe dressing down for it!

Otherwise, the institution of temporarily courtesanship you created in this story is an intriguing one that has me very interested. I'm thinking about the social consequences, too. But I also think that the danger for any Elf taking the collar to develop the mindset of a true slave - and having trouble to get rid of it again afterwards - is very real, especially if there are Elves around who *treat* the ones who take the collar as true slaves. As Haldir seems to do, at least with his own courtesan and Legolas. In so far, some of the concerns of 'Thranduil Oropherion' about the courtesanship resembling intendured slavery and the oath of the collar meaning giving up the right of consent are not entirely unfounded, in my view. However, I trust you to resolve this riddle and give more background information about this later in your story, and I hope you will at some point in the future deal with it again; perhaps, showing us how Legolas view of the oath develops in time with his experiences of courtesanship in regard to the way he felt about it in the chapter with Glorfindel helping him to accept it.

Anyway. *I* really like your story. I think the harsher warnings are okay, but I never had any problems with your universe before you took to them, too. There *are* a few stories at aff.net where I *have* problems to read, in spite of my own very dark tale of utter slavery and non-consent; for example, Esteliel's 'Cuil Eden' and 'Anestel' are hard to read for me, because they push some buttons for me that make me squirm and shudder away from them. But that does *not* mean they aren't masterfully written, and I do *not* need to give negative feedback. I simply do not read them anymore after I found out they are not my cup of tea at some pointt in early chapters. I wonder why the one reviewing under the name of Thranduil Oropherion did not follow that rule with your fic.

Write on, please, because this story is truly interesting!

Cheers, Aislynn Crowdaughter

My Dear Miss Ertia,

You accuse me of underhanded tactics of which I am not guilty. I rated your story as many times as I reviewed it. You have my word on that.

The new set of warnings are much better, however they are still inadequate. I am quite familiar with the early chapters of this story, and the reviews of them. I noted that after two early protests the critics gave up and went away. I thought it might be time for a little reality check.

This story starts out, as you say, seemingly charming and innocent, enough to lure you into expecting a jolly sex romp for Prince Legolas in Lothlorien. What's not to like? But then you seem to lose control of it, introducing elements of darkfic that are all the more upsetting because of the light and humorous tones of the early chapters. Legolas's tears in the forest as Glorfindel has him recite the oath of courtesanship and divest himself of his name and identity was where it all began to go wrong. That wax a psychotic break, my dear, and you don't even seem to know it.

Then we have Galadriel's hilarious sex prank on Legolas so that he may be punished for Celeborn to enjoy and Haldir to sneer at -- and this after Mirie had told him it was ennobling to give oneself in trust to another. His new owners cannot be trusted, as it was obvious this had been planned all along.

And then the scene between Legolas and Celeborn, which comes as close as possible to a 'marital rape' as one can get. His only consent to that was signing the contract and swearing the oath. He can now look forward to fourteen and a half more years of the same, or worse, if it suits his lord and owner. And view his response to it -- "I deserved that because I've treated courtesans selfishly in the past." If Legolas has indeed ever treated acourtesan or any other elf that way, those scenes were missing from the early chapters. Legolas's BDSM affair with the Mirkwood guard was consensual, and his blowjob from Mirie was actually at her ionstigation.

In fact, if any elf is guilty discourtesy towards those he considers to be his inferiors, it would be Marchwarden Haldir with his blatant contempt for the male courtesans.

I'm sure you intended Legolas's submission to the 'rough sex' and the slap to be a charming humility. Some of us are seeing it as Stockholm Syndrome. Read up on it.

I am most sorry to lob a rotten tomato at your work of art, but you can expect a few of them if you write a story like this one. At least 'Celebrian' and 'An Orcish Surprise' were upfront and honest about what they were.

By the way, I very much enjoyed "Lessons." Everyone in that story had a good time and no one was hurt or humiliated. That is why I gave this one a try, to my everlasting grief.

Oh, and that whirring sound? It's Prof. Tolkien spinning in his grave.