AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Adventers

by slayer-of-evil

person Anon
schedule August 1, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Please consider writing in your native language...
schedule May 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
you REALLY REALLY need a beta...i can't emphasize that enough...there's nothing to really tell when people are talking, the story is very choppy and barely any good descriptions at all [tis always better to hint than to just say outright]. is english your first language? i can't tell in this story if it is or not...and that is usually an indicator that you need a good beta.
schedule July 5, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Very nice story man.
Maybe you can add some more chapters.