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January 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Wicked, wicked Haldir! *heart beating wildly* This is a great story! Keep updating!!! I love everything about it!!!! I wonder, will Haldir get both of them in the end like he hopes??? That would be rather interesting, wouldn't it! :)
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January 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
You are doing such a fantastic job with this story! I won't be redundant and repeat all of the previous reviewers praises, but do know that I am also in awe of your superb story telling abilities. :)
Your characterizations are outstanding, and the imagery and moods that you've created, fit the story perfectly. It is very easy for me imagine the setting and the mood. Fantastic! I didn't think that the sexual tension could get any thicker, but boy was I wrong!
Great work! I'll be on the look out for your next update.
Michelle...
Your characterizations are outstanding, and the imagery and moods that you've created, fit the story perfectly. It is very easy for me imagine the setting and the mood. Fantastic! I didn't think that the sexual tension could get any thicker, but boy was I wrong!
Great work! I'll be on the look out for your next update.
Michelle...
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January 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
You know, you are one of the very few people around here who can tell two chapters of a story with not much else happening apart from two people talking while they are sitting by the fire... and have the reader sit with eyes wide open, afraid to blink and perhaps miss a single second of it! :) And that again is one of the highest compliments I can give you, my dear! :)
I also quite enjoyed your author's notes at the beginning of your recent update. Your notes and comments were very insightful indeed when it comes to Haldir, his character and his motives. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my earlier thoughts regarding Haldir and his special gift! You apparently have given this story as well as the development of its characters a lot of thought and it really shows. The story really reminds me of a sensual chess game which is why I was glad to learn that Haldir will not use his powers to the max in order to get what he wants. Good to know! :)
I really hope you make this a wonderful long story such as "Between Friends" which, as you know, I enjoyed tremendously as well. And as for the elf smut you announced. *gives Haldir the naughty look* Who are we to argue with the author?... *veg* :D
I am running out of nice things to say and compliments to pay but I am sure you get the basic idea which is mainly that I still adore this story and the way you tell it, lol!
I also quite enjoyed your author's notes at the beginning of your recent update. Your notes and comments were very insightful indeed when it comes to Haldir, his character and his motives. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my earlier thoughts regarding Haldir and his special gift! You apparently have given this story as well as the development of its characters a lot of thought and it really shows. The story really reminds me of a sensual chess game which is why I was glad to learn that Haldir will not use his powers to the max in order to get what he wants. Good to know! :)
I really hope you make this a wonderful long story such as "Between Friends" which, as you know, I enjoyed tremendously as well. And as for the elf smut you announced. *gives Haldir the naughty look* Who are we to argue with the author?... *veg* :D
I am running out of nice things to say and compliments to pay but I am sure you get the basic idea which is mainly that I still adore this story and the way you tell it, lol!
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January 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
*Pondering if that was a yes or a no* Well I hope you update again soon, it's such a lovely story :D
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January 24, 2005 at 12:00 AM
*looks at Michelle's review and snorts*
I couldn't agree more, my dear, I couldn't agree more. Torn between two gorgeous elves... that is not a bad way to start the day! :D
I couldn't agree more, my dear, I couldn't agree more. Torn between two gorgeous elves... that is not a bad way to start the day! :D
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January 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Oh wow! This story just keeps more and more intense. I love it! She really is a strong woman if she can resist what Haldir is doing to her. He's certainly pulling out all of his tricks, isn't he?
You're doing a fantastic job creating sexual tension between these two. The storyline really is great. It's turning into quite a suspense; when, where, and how is she going to give into Haldir? LOL
But, I really do feel sorry for her. She's trying to stay true to Legolas, but is extremely attracted to Haldir. What a dilema?! Oh, if only I had those kinds of problems. *sigh*
Great job! I can't wait for your next update!
Michelle...
You're doing a fantastic job creating sexual tension between these two. The storyline really is great. It's turning into quite a suspense; when, where, and how is she going to give into Haldir? LOL
But, I really do feel sorry for her. She's trying to stay true to Legolas, but is extremely attracted to Haldir. What a dilema?! Oh, if only I had those kinds of problems. *sigh*
Great job! I can't wait for your next update!
Michelle...
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January 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Off we go...
Chapter 10:
"Haldir hid his smile as he slowly removed his tunic for her. But this time she was too busy pulling lembas and water from her pack to watch him. He was quite disappointed but knew there would be plenty more times in the very near future for him to tempt her with his bare torso and his desire. This he intended to do at every opportunity."
HALDIR, YOU OLD SHOW-OFF! :D He really is a peacock, isn't he, lol?! This really made me laugh out loud.
Loved how she stroked his hair while he was sleeping and how she threw the cloak over him. :)
One little thing (and I hope you don't mind this coming form me since I am not a native speaker): I think there are a few occasions in those three chapters where it should be "had to" instead of "must" since it is indirect speech. For example, in chapter 10 instead of: "She must take advantage of the opportunity before he came to his senses." it should be "She had to take advantage...".
No big deal though. :)
OK, on to the next chapter...
Chapter 10:
"Haldir hid his smile as he slowly removed his tunic for her. But this time she was too busy pulling lembas and water from her pack to watch him. He was quite disappointed but knew there would be plenty more times in the very near future for him to tempt her with his bare torso and his desire. This he intended to do at every opportunity."
HALDIR, YOU OLD SHOW-OFF! :D He really is a peacock, isn't he, lol?! This really made me laugh out loud.
Loved how she stroked his hair while he was sleeping and how she threw the cloak over him. :)
One little thing (and I hope you don't mind this coming form me since I am not a native speaker): I think there are a few occasions in those three chapters where it should be "had to" instead of "must" since it is indirect speech. For example, in chapter 10 instead of: "She must take advantage of the opportunity before he came to his senses." it should be "She had to take advantage...".
No big deal though. :)
OK, on to the next chapter...
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January 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 11:
Mmmh... mmmmhhhh... as far as I am concerned you con go on forever with this story. :D I think there are a few authors on this site that could take a leaf out of your book of writing so to speak when it comes to sensuality. This was such a wonderful example IMHO of how it should be done. And I said this before but once again you make wonderful use of ALL senses in this chapter while most authors only concentrate on sight and sound. You incorporate all of them. Very well done!
This chapter and the wonderfully delightful tension between the two of them was another joy to read. I love how you increase said tension from chapter to chapter and take the "art of vicious seduction from one chapter to the next.
It was fascinating to see how Haldir used his powers on Annowe and yet another interesting plot device. Personally though I hope that when she finally does give in to him, that it will be out of her free will and not because he simply plays out that power. I want her to give in to him because she cannot resist him and not because he manipulated her enough for her to want him. So you might be careful how you use that particular device. Then again, that is just my opinion, lol, but I hope you get my point. They are both strong characters and one shouldn't be forced to manipulate the other, I think. She would be drawn to him no matter what, so he doesn't really need those powers I think. :)
aaaaaaand on to the next chapter... *wipes sweat off forehead*
Mmmh... mmmmhhhh... as far as I am concerned you con go on forever with this story. :D I think there are a few authors on this site that could take a leaf out of your book of writing so to speak when it comes to sensuality. This was such a wonderful example IMHO of how it should be done. And I said this before but once again you make wonderful use of ALL senses in this chapter while most authors only concentrate on sight and sound. You incorporate all of them. Very well done!
This chapter and the wonderfully delightful tension between the two of them was another joy to read. I love how you increase said tension from chapter to chapter and take the "art of vicious seduction from one chapter to the next.
It was fascinating to see how Haldir used his powers on Annowe and yet another interesting plot device. Personally though I hope that when she finally does give in to him, that it will be out of her free will and not because he simply plays out that power. I want her to give in to him because she cannot resist him and not because he manipulated her enough for her to want him. So you might be careful how you use that particular device. Then again, that is just my opinion, lol, but I hope you get my point. They are both strong characters and one shouldn't be forced to manipulate the other, I think. She would be drawn to him no matter what, so he doesn't really need those powers I think. :)
aaaaaaand on to the next chapter... *wipes sweat off forehead*
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January 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 12:
*shakes her head*
I always felt that two people who are attracted to each other and use there "ten finger entertainment kit" rather then have great sex together is such a waste of sensual energy, lol! But once again the way you described this was masterful, particularly since Haldir refrained to only listen to her rather then watch her.
And I thought his sexual fantasy was very interesting! In chapter 11 I was at a bit of a loss, why Haldir would be so ecstatic at Annowe's wish to teach the use of his powers to Legolas. The penny dropped of course after having read chapter 12. Very nice twist once again. Until then I thought this was more about Haldir outdoing Legolas rather then incorporating him into his fantasies so it was a great little turn to see that Haldir would in fact love to enjoy the "best of both" so to speak. ;)
Again, have a look at the use of indirect speech in this chapter. "She must be mad to be feeling this way toward him!" IMO should be "She had to be mad..."
"She must shut it out." should be "She had to shut it out." and so on... However it is used correctly whenever you let your characters speak or think directly as in "I must not let this happen". Hope you don't mind me pointing this out again, really just a tiny detail. :)
OK, what else is left to say, but... MORE, MORE, MORE! :)
*shakes her head*
I always felt that two people who are attracted to each other and use there "ten finger entertainment kit" rather then have great sex together is such a waste of sensual energy, lol! But once again the way you described this was masterful, particularly since Haldir refrained to only listen to her rather then watch her.
And I thought his sexual fantasy was very interesting! In chapter 11 I was at a bit of a loss, why Haldir would be so ecstatic at Annowe's wish to teach the use of his powers to Legolas. The penny dropped of course after having read chapter 12. Very nice twist once again. Until then I thought this was more about Haldir outdoing Legolas rather then incorporating him into his fantasies so it was a great little turn to see that Haldir would in fact love to enjoy the "best of both" so to speak. ;)
Again, have a look at the use of indirect speech in this chapter. "She must be mad to be feeling this way toward him!" IMO should be "She had to be mad..."
"She must shut it out." should be "She had to shut it out." and so on... However it is used correctly whenever you let your characters speak or think directly as in "I must not let this happen". Hope you don't mind me pointing this out again, really just a tiny detail. :)
OK, what else is left to say, but... MORE, MORE, MORE! :)
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January 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
*laughs at your reply* You know he doesn't actually die in the books *hint hint*
Anyhow, ehm...well my other review in the book section where you placed it also is clear with what I think of your story...as you probably have found out. I'm really amazed by the quality of it...
Can I borrow Haldir for the night perhaps *smirks* Anyhow...I hope you update again soon, I can hardly wait
Anyhow, ehm...well my other review in the book section where you placed it also is clear with what I think of your story...as you probably have found out. I'm really amazed by the quality of it...
Can I borrow Haldir for the night perhaps *smirks* Anyhow...I hope you update again soon, I can hardly wait